A.N: Continuation of R breakup, this is the previous chapter watched through Serena's eyes. Remember the episode in which Sailor Moon covered Rini with her body to protect her from the Black Moon and was told by Rubeus that she wasn't in the future. It is his words, not the episode's events, that are significant here.

Disclaimer: I don't own Sailor Moon. No wonder it's so easy for me to write depressing stories.

Why We Can't

Chapter Two: This Is Why Not

"Why?" She could feel hot tears splashing onto her cheeks. His blue eyes were so dark, so cold, like a stormy ocean. What had she done?

"We can't." Those words, like a knife, digging under her heart with an icy blade that stole her breath. She reached out with a trembling hand, then felt her heart shatter as he shoved it away. She gasped, vision blurring.

"But I need you! Darien!"

Her shoulders shook with tears; she hated herself for being such a baby in front of him. She hid her face as more sobs wracked her body. Why was he doing this?

"Leave."

His voice, so cold. She lifted her head, not bothering to wipe the tears from her eyes or her cheeks. Her throat burned.

"Darien…!"

She flinched from his emotionless gaze, like two bits of ice. Her throat sealed up. There was no more to say.

"Leave now, Serena."

But…in her frozen state, Serena felt a fresh anguish well up in her. Her lips parted before she could realize what she was doing; a voice that was her own and not her own cried out:

"Endymion!"

Serenity, calling out. Serena squeezed her eyes shut tight, hoping against hope…maybe Serenity could do what Serena could not. Maybe she would remind Darien what they were – what they had been.

She saw his eyes flicker. Her heart jumped to her throat. But then his face hardened, his lips moved.

"I don't love you anymore, Serenity."

She sucked in a breath, trying to soothe the gaping wound that he had just gouged in her chest. His words were salt.

"Just leave."

A cry tore from her lips. Her fingers dropped the golden object she had been desperately clutching like a good-luck charm. It fell to the floor between them with a clatter, and she ran.

"It hurts…" The words seeped into her pillow with her tears. She buried her head further, trying to muffle her crying. Maybe if she could drown out the sound of her tears, she could drown out the pain. "Darien…why?" She hiccoughed. "Why can't we…?"

Her ragged gasps eventually died away with the sunset, slipping her into a feverish sleep. The stars slowly emerged, glinting with tears in sympathy of her desolation.

A full moon ascended into the heavens, and sent down fingers of moonlight to caress her tearstained face. She moaned. Her breath began to quicken, and she tossed and turned under the blanket. No moonlight could soothe what the Earth's son had hurt.

"You can't mean it…Endymion… " Her eyes darted frantically beneath her eyelids, as she chased after him in the Sandman's realm. "Darien…why? Why?" Her voice trailed off to a sob.

Blonde hair swirled as she bolted up in bed, eyes wide and streaming. Shivering in her nightgown, she pulled her knees up to her chest and wrapped her arms around her legs. Back and forth, she rocked herself, back and forth, bloodshot blue eyes staring into the night shadows.

She had always felt like a flower in his arms. He was as unshakable, as immovable and invincible, as the earth that he was Guardian of, wrapping around her with the promise never to let go, never to let her be torn away, no matter how viciously the winds may blow. His gaze had been like sunlight, and she had stretched out to bask in his warmth.

But then the cloud had come.

The sun peeked tentatively over the horizon, washing the sky with a tangerine glow. She shivered slightly, unaccustomed to the early-morning mist that hung in the streets. Her pace, already at a snail's speed, slowed further, and she warily glanced out of the corner of her eyes. A small, sad smile curved her lips.

Do you think that I can't see you?

The tears she had cried had not blinded her. Goosebumps still followed the trail of his eyes across her skin.

I can still feel you. What is this game that you're playing?

A flash of color; she lifted a finger to pull the curtain of hair from her eyes, but the motorcycle revved and sped away in a blur of black, snatching her hope away with it.

A single flutter of a butterfly's wings could start a tsunami, or so her science book informed her. The thought forced her to bite her lip and wonder…did she do something to drive him away? Was she too loud? Too stupid? Too whiny?

I'm not perfect…but I thought you didn't care…

Another youma. A sigh escaped her lips as she dove out of the way of another grenade. She just wanted to be back in bed, huddled in her blankets, pretending that they were his arms around her. And yet, at the same time, she was relieved to have an excuse not to remain curled up and vulnerable to the relentless onslaught of nightmares.

But what was the use? What did it matter? Her whole life had become a nightmare, anyway – he didn't love her.

Her legs buckled with the weight of that statement, knocking her to her knees. Her stinging eyes focused on the grenade now speeding toward her. Her body froze. Her heart was ice.

"Sailor Moon!"

She heard the scream dimly, as though from a very long distance away. Her stomach flipped. Hands encircled her waist, pulling her back against a chest. Warmth seeped through her like syrup. Her stomach flipped again. She heard harsh breathing. Saw his blank mask. Felt his pulse throbbing beneath her wrists.

She stared at him, her lips pressed together to imprison the sobs that tried to tear free of her throat. She did not dare to speak, did not dare to move.

His footfalls echoed like gunshots in the stillness as he stepped away from her. Like gunshots to her heart. She closed her eyes to conceal the pain, wishing, for the first time, that she had a mask like his to hide behind.

She heard him leap away. By the time her eyes opened, he was nothing more than a dark shape blotting out stars as he bounded across the rooftops.

A deadened feeling smothered her as she slid back under her blankets; why did it feel like she was slipping into her own coffin? Her body trembled with the thought. Her fingers itched with the absence of the locket, her ears straining to hear the melody that wasn't there. Her heart groping outwards in the darkness for someone who wasn't there.

She could feel his presence lingering on the edge of her ragged mind, like a cobweb that had escaped spring cleaning. But for all the anguish it caused her, despite all the serrated memories it evoked, she couldn't brush it away. Instead, she snatched it and clasped it close.

Something rustled outside her window. She barely heard. The cobweb was warm, lulling her into an uneasy slumber.

Darien…

April showers bring May flowers. Rain pounded down on her neck as she trudged through the gardens and planted bleeding hearts.

She reached a bench and collapsed. The water dripped down her skin like the sweat that poured down her body after her nightmares. Thunder crashed, threatening to split the very sky in two.

She didn't flinch. Her friends would have fainted from shock. Thunder had always terrified her, before.

But now, what was there to be scared of? The event she had feared most had already come to pass. And now… thunder brought back memories of her, huddling in his protective embrace, his breath tickling her ear as he murmured reassuring words to her…those times had been wonderful.

How could she have hated those thunderstorms?

Her mouth tasted sour as she bolted up in bed, whimpering and pressing her pillow against her face to smother the scream that clawed at her throat. That taste in her mouth, so salty – had that truly been her own blood she'd been tasting, as her life slowly melted away? It had been such a wonderful dream…until the cloud came.

Tiny hiccoughs quaked her body; tears coated her face; she swiped them away hurriedly, almost in a panic, for they felt too much like the red liquid from her dream.

I've seen the future…

…and you're not in it!

She choked on a sob, her arms clutching around herself convulsively. Her limbs trembled violently. She would die. She felt it in her bones, felt it as vividly as she had felt the blood streaming out of her lips, down her face.

…the future…

…you're not in it…

…not in it…

She was going to die.

The realization descended upon her and wrapped around every contour of her being like a hissing cobra, pressing, squeezing, smothering her. She retched.

The night was silent. Unbearably, heartbreakingly silent. She lifted her throbbing head and looked outside the window, ignoring the fat full moon to stare desperately into the leaves outside.

I've seen the future…

A wordless, unintelligible wail tore from the depths of her heart, soaring to an animal crescendo that reverberated from every corner of her mind, deafening her.

The tree was empty.

…and you're not in it.

A/N: Wow, I'm crying… brushes away tears so she can see computer screen Maybe it's just me, though….tell me if this chapter seemed melodramatic, cause if it does, I need to fix it…I hope you guys liked this chapter. The ending was my favorite part of it…did you catch the double meaning?

As always, review and tell me if you caught it or not. Flames are totally welcome, provided there's no swearing. In your reviews, also tell me if you want me to add some plot, cause I might have an idea, but I don't want to ruin the story if you guys would prefer a short, heartbreaking, unresolved piece.

Lots of love!

P.S.: Serenity-hime, you're so marvelous. You always give such wonderful reviews…they make me so happy I could explode – or maybe that was the dynamite I swallowed at lunch… wink

Meg-chan, I'm not sure if you're reading this or not, cause you've already read this fic, but if you are, know that I'm thinking about you. You're awesome, and make sure you put your baka in his place!