A/N: Again, thank you for the reviews. They lighten the writing!

Continued from chapter 7

/-

The red numbers on her alarm read 3:27. Samantha had been watching them slowly progress from 2:44 till their current state while wondering if watching made it feel like time went faster or slower.

3:28.

Right now she was thinking slower, definitely slower.

She could feel him behind her. He had been asleep for the last couple of hours, both, she suspected, as a result of their earlier activities and the long, stressful hours of the job. He never did get enough rest.

He was resting now, though. She could feel his even breath against the back of her neck, his body pressed against her back and his left arm draped lightly over her waist. She was the one who was awake. A tired smile showed briefly on her face. It was déjà vu all over again. Back when their affair was still on, she would often lay awake, watching him sleep. Back then, time had been moving too fast.

The recollection spurred something in her and she turned around to face him. Her movement made him stir, the arm at her waist pulling her closer ever so slightly before becoming limp again. Sam smiled again, despite herself. Typical Jack, he never could make up his mind.

And apparently, neither could she.

She immediately pushed the thought away; she wasn´t going to think about that now. She would have plenty of time to beat herself up and think about all the ramifications of this night soon enough. Right now, she wanted to just be in the moment and pretend that everything was all right with the world. Pretend that she didn´t just break every single promise she had ever made to herself. Pretend that she hadn´t cheated on Martin. Pretend that she wasn´t lying here in bed with Jack.

And most at all she wanted to pretend it didn´t feel so right when every single voice in her head were screaming it was wrong.

She sighed. Normally she was very good at pretending, but it had always been difficult with Jack and that didn´t seem to have changed. She wondered if anything had really changed at all.

Very carefully, she brushed a stray lock of hair away from his face. It always amazed her how peaceful he looked when he slept. She had commented on it once and it surprised him, but pleasantly. He said that it had to be because she was there with him. She had kissed him after that and they were both late for work that morning.

She propped herself onto her elbow to be able to see him better. He also looked younger when he slept. She had never cared about the age difference - that had more been one of Jack´s concerns. However, she had managed to nip that one in the bud pretty quickly by saying that with all the factors involved in their relationship that really should be the last thing on his mind.

At first she hadn´t really cared that he was married either and when that changed it was too late. Sam had found herself head over heels in love with her married boss and as much as that scared her, the thought of not loving him was even scarier. So she had settled. Settled for what he could give her and it had been so very, very difficult, but made tolerable because she knew deep down he was hers.

He showed it in so many ways; a look, a stolen touch, the smile that always lit up his eyes when he saw her again after a night´s separation only to be followed by the answering pain when he had to leave. She had known he would come to her whenever she needed him; he hadn´t had to prove that by risking his life for her then. She never felt safer than when she was with him, whether in a small café or in pursuit of a suspect didn´t matter.

All that mattered was that he was there.

When they were together, she was the sole focus of his attention and it made her feel cherished and wanted in a way no one else ever had. For hours he would quietly listen to her stress over the same minuscule details that had caused a case to end badly. He would hold her, stroke her hair and when she was calmer he would tell her it wasn´t anyone´s fault and that everything would be all right. In those moments, she had believed him. In those moments, she had been happy.

And then he broke her heart.

In fact, he kept breaking it over and over again, and she had let him, even assisted him at times.

Not again.

"Hey."

Sam smiled softly, slowly letting her fingertips brush against his face. "Did my incessant staring finally get to you?"

"No," Jack closed his eyes briefly as he felt her touch, a small smile of his own playing on his lips. "I´ve never minded that."

"Then why are you awake?"

He shrugged as much as was possible lying down, seeking out and holding her gaze. "Maybe I just missed you?"

She smiled again, but didn´t reply and just moved her hand a little to play with his slightly ruffled hair. Jack fell silent, too, but continued to watch her and Sam knew she would soon see a question emerge in his eyes. It was a question she wasn´t ready to answer yet. So she took the safe way out.

"Do you think we´ll find her?"

It was clear that he knew immediately who she was talking about, but also that it was probably the last thing he had expected her to say.

"I don´t know; Sam, it´s been more than 48 hours."

She lowered her gaze, focusing on his lips as she gently trailed them with a finger.

"Hey, that tickles," he complained good-humouredly and she felt his hot breath against her hand.

"Soak it up," she teased with a faint grin, her touch becoming almost feather light for emphasis. "You´re in my bed and my rules apply."

She saw amusement in his eyes, but he didn´t comment and just rolled fully onto his back to give her better access. Sam scooted closer, just stopping short of actually touching his body with hers. Instead she continued to caress his face tenderly, smoothing out an eyebrow or running a finger along a cheekbone, her expression one of intense concentration.

The expression on Jack´s face was closer to pure bliss and his eyelids began to close. Sam knew that if she kept this up, she would put him back to sleep soon. She wasn´t sure if she wanted that or not.

"It almost feels like you´re mapping me out." His voice was drowsy and content. "Like you´re memorizing everything."

"Maybe I am."

Her response had been innocent enough, but something in the way she had spoken made his eyes flutter right open and he reached up to still her hand. "Sam?"

All he saw was sadness.

"Sam, Sam no…" He rolled onto his side, pressing her hand against his chest. "Whatever you´re thinking, don´t."

"It´s okay, Jack."

"No, no, it´s not."

She saw the alarm in his eyes and searched for words to reassure him, but without success and she realized it was because she didn´t have any to offer.

"Please don´t say you regret this?"

"I don´t," she answered quietly and to her surprise, Sam realized it was the truth. It was fitting somehow. They had started out with her being the other woman, now they could finish it with him being the other man. The irony made her smile a little, but it was a smile that never made it to her eyes.

Jack regarded her for a moment, his expression growing somber. Then, abruptly, he moved in to capture her lips in a fierce kiss. Along with surprise, Sam felt desire instantly surge through her just like she always did with him; just as if she was still an awkward teenager experiencing love for the first time. In all their moments together, even when they had pretended it was only work or friendship, that the glances or the touches were casual and innocent, it never failed to fill her with warmth and excitement.

He had known it too. The backseats of several rental cars could testify to that.

"Jack…" she whispered, knowing that she should stop him, for both their sakes, but also realizing with absolute clarity that she wasn´t going to.

He quickly rolled her onto her back, following the movement and resting carefully above her, keeping most of his weight on his elbows. Just like in the past, she would have none of it and pulled him down onto her body. She felt him inhale sharply, knowing exactly what the full body contact did to him and she couldn´t help but smile.

"Sam…"

She silenced him with a kiss matching his previous fervour. She didn´t want to talk any more. All she wanted was him, to feel him, to hold him and to love him in the way she had had to restrain from for way too long. All she wanted was to allow herself that luxury one last time.

She wrapped her arms and legs around him and closed her eyes. He had lost weight since they were last together, but, like earlier, her body recognized the feel of him and responded accordingly. He kissed her deeply and she held his head firmly between her hands, returning the kiss with almost frantic intensity. Running a hand down his back, their teeth nearly clashed as she pulled him against her and he moaned into her mouth. Then she suddenly pulled away.

"What-?" Jack´s eyes were dark and hazy with desire.

She tried to catch her breath, placing a shaky hand on the side of his face to reassure him. "It´s okay. I just want us to slow down."

He swallowed visibly. "Slow down?"

"Yes," she smiled, and at that moment Jack thought she had never looked more beautiful, her face flushed and eyes shining. "I want it to last."

The look on his face slowly transformed into one of such tenderness that Sam felt her chest constrict almost painfully. He leaned down, kissing the soft swell of her breast before moving back to her lips, whispering against them, "Then let´s make it last."

After that, no real words were spoken and the silence was only broken by soft gasps and moans. Their movements slowed down, but not their passion as they rediscovered each other´s bodies without the urgency that marked their earlier encounter that night. This time it was Jack who was mapping her out, exploring every part of her with his hands and lips, his every touch burning into her memory as she trembled beneath him. He felt so good against her, so warm and strong and right.

When at last their sweat-slicked bodies joined and he moved inside her, she broke away from his kiss and buried her face against his neck, overwhelmed and almost frightened by the intensity of her feelings. Clinging to him, she held him as tightly as she could, feeling his body shudder in response.

"Samantha…"

The sound of her name on his lips was her final undoing and her quiet gasp was his.

Afterward he held her and she could hear his frantic heartbeat slowly calm down as he stroked her matted hair, gently combing it out with his fingers. She didn´t feel the need to speak and knew he didn´t either. She fell asleep with him still caressing her hair.

TBC…