NOTE: FLAMERS WELCOME!
Authors note: Ah, at last. We finally reach our first crossover, and so I give you the Hellsing version of my story! Also I offer you the greatest fan character ever as he makes his debut. So sit back, get a cup of tea, and enjoy my fourth chapter in this off the wall tale.
Chapter 4: Vampire Hunter
The Hellsing Saga
Inside a crypt, on a moonlit night, only a mad man would be seen hanging round in the graveyard of the undead. The dim light of the torches hanging from off the walls offers no calm to any passers by, but one man still striding onwards despite fear, despite imminent doom. Brushing his way through cobwebs, the grit crunching under his feet. He stops under a burning torch scanning the rest of the seemingly desolate crypt.
We finally get the full view of our new stupid, urm I mean brave warrior, yeah that'll stick. His long flowing Golden Blonde hair blew with the mild breeze passing through the crypts passages, before it settles elegantly on his shoulders. His eyes a graceful sky blue, sitting neatly amongst his smooth cheekbones and perfectly formed nose.
He cracked open a large twelve gauge Shotgun, gently resting it in his arm before fumbling around in the large classic Spitfire jacket. The collar was neatly turned up, to make himself feel cool. He's insecure like that. Eventually he got what he was looking for, he took the shells from his pocket and softly slid them in. With a quick lash of his arm, the Shotgun slammed shut with ease. Our new character walks onwards into the dark of the crypt, prepared for the fight for his life.
Now outside, our perspective changes to the ever ready Andrew Angelsword who now wields a large sword courtesy of the 'Elven Jackie Chan mutilation company'. Andrew cautiously peeks round the entrance to crypt.
"I have to go in here?" says Andrew jittering slightly.
"Don't worry little Andrew you can't die, you're the main character" echoes the disembodied voice of the Author reassuringly.
"Oh that's ok then" sighs Andrew.
"Well maybe not until later Chapters" murmurs the Author.
"What was that?"
"Nothing, nothing… Just kick some arse Andrew"
Back inside the crypt, the latest edition to the story, still ambles on further to the belly of the beast. Stopping alertly, he looked around again for the fiends he was hunting. A torch blew itself out behind him; he quickly looks over his shoulder, to see nothing but the glowing embers of the dying torch.
"It's quiet down here, too quiet" he whispers to himself in a stern British accent.
Proceeding on with even more caution, the crunching of grit under his feet becoming louder. He began to sweat slightly, but inside he knew he had to keep his cool. Walking further down the tunnel whispers of the damned could be heard, but it all stopped when the explorer came to doorway leading to a large room. It was the heart of the crypt. The lighting was slightly better than rest of the tunnels and passageways, a musky dry smell hung in the room. At the centre of seeming hall of hell was a small sandstone well, with writing carved into it. The man walks up to it and gently brushed away the dust to read the message.
'Death come on swift wings to whom ever enters this crypt'"That' just a bad rip o…"
Before he could finish his sentence, the adventurer flew to the floor with super fast strike from some being now standing in the corner of the room. Masses of ghouls appear from the shadows on the wall. The individual got up pointing his shotgun towards the head vampire.
"You shouldn't have come here human!" shouts the freakishly large and well-dressed Vampire.
You may have struck me down first but I assure you, that I will be the only "one leaving this crypt!" the explorer shouts back.
"I was going to make you one of my ghouls, but I think I'll have more fun watching my servants rip you apart" says the vampire cackling away.
"Cock it!" the young man grips his shotgun before letting out a loud scream.
"Kill him!"
He fires his shotgun into the mass of ghouls, three went flying backwards vaporising into dust as they hit floor. He fired again with his second shell, a perfect aim on one of the ghouls head, it exploded off leaving only its spinal cord flailing around before the ghoul turned into ash. The explorer effortlessly flicks open his twelve gauge and reloaded with two more cartridges, he flicks his arm again snapping the gun shut. Taking aim quickly two more ghouls fell to the floor becoming nothing more than ash.
Elsewhere in the crypt, Andrew crept through the passageways, with the super stealth move that he had read from Elven Jackie Chan's book. Angelsword jumps at the sound of shotgun blasts, he hurries onwards into the crypt to see what the cause of the ruckus was.
Piles of ashes scatter the room, while the explorer disposes the last of the ghouls, by pushing the bunt of his shotgun into the chest of one but lining another one behind. Without hesitation the trigger is pulled. The centre torsos are completely blasted away, both of them collapse and disintegrate.
"What! That shouldn't have happened! You're supposed to die!" shouts the head Vampire, angered by the explorer's ability to avoid death.
"I hope you burn in the deepest pits of hell!" says the explorer calmly, raising his shotgun.
"Do you think that pea shooter can harm me?" chuckles the vampire.
The vampire crouches back unusually, making the explorer drop his guard slightly, suddenly the vampire flies towards the mortal punching him and blasting backwards into the wall.
"Pitiful human, so fragile" he looks at his prey breathless from the knock.
The vampire leant down to bite the poor mortal's neck and turn him into the undead slave of his army.
"Stop right there, Vampire scum!" shouts Andrew standing in the doorway, brandishing his sword.
"Ah, you've made it here at last. I've been waiting nearly a Millennium for this" the vampire got to his feet, and smiles at Andrew.
"What are you talking about?" asks Angelsword.
Both of them poise for action, and leap at each other. They glance past just like in popular manga. The two duellists land gracefully, seconds pass in silence. But the outcome is obvious as the Vampires head slowly slides off his shoulders, with the body collapsing soon after. Andrew smiles, and walks over to the wounded explorer.
"Are you okay?" asks Andrew
"I'll survive" he raises a smile before coughing up some blood.
"What's your name explorer?"
"My name is Adam, Adam Lait, Vampire Hunter," he answers, still on the verge of dying.
"Let's get you out of here and carry on, this chapter's dragging on" mentions Andrew.
Andrew drags a limping Adam out of the crypt. Behind them the slain vampire begins to melt mysteriously, while the heroes make a valiant escape.
Back outside, Andrew continues to drag Adam outside. The cold air hit them sharply as the wind picked up pace.
"Let me go I'll be fine now" Adam pushes himself away from Andrew, and tries to find his footing.
"Are you sure you'll be ok?" asks Andrew rather timidly.
"Yes I'll be fine" Adam stops again to regain his breath, before continuing the conversation with Andrew. "I must do one thing before I can leave your presence"
What's that?" enquires Andrew.
"For saving my life, I owe you mine. So please except it, that I shan't leave your side in battle until my debt has been repaid to you" Adam made a slight curtsy in the direction of Andrew.
"Well, err, thank you. I think?" replies Andrew surprised by the unusual amount of good will towards him.
Wind picks up its pace again, rustling the trees more violently. The clouds clear revealing the might of a full moon. Two Dark blood red circles appear in the blackness of the night. They could only fit one person in particular. The figure gracefully strolls into the moonlight revealing himself to our two heroes.
"A perfect night for Vampires, no?" chuckles the all too familiar outline of Alucard.
With all the energy Adam had left over, he flung his shotgun aiming it at Alucard.
Alucard could only laugh at Adams attempt of trying to be serious.
"Shooting me with that toy would be unadvisable" he bellows. "I have watched your vampire killing prowess from inside the crypt, and I admit, it has impressed me. I know someone who could skills like yours"
"A vampire that wants us, to help him kill vampires. That makes no sense!" shouts Andrew feeling his head explode internally from all the plot holes coming out.
"Shut up and come with me otherwise the authors fucked for ideas!" yells Alucard.
"Well we better had, I don't want to be around for one chapter. Anyway if the author doesn't update soon this story will end up on page one hundred of Fan Fiction Crossovers! Rotting and going stagnant" Adam becomes stressed out with worry.
"Well that had happened before the author had started writing"
"If you wish for the story to continue follow me" continues Alucard ignoring both Andrews and Adams rants. "Follow me to my master"
PLEASE NOTE:
ANDREW ANGELSWORD HAS MADE A FULL APOLOGY TO SOVIET MAN AND MIGHT RETURN NEXT CHAPTER.
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This week Soviet Man and the Street Preaching Maniac are currently held up in a warehouse, hiding from the Hellsing organisation after certain… fics.
"Oh crap, what the hell are we going to do?" yells Soviet Man.
"Don't worry I've got the perfect plan" says Street Preaching Maniac rubbing his hands together.
KNOCK! KNOCK! KNOCK!
"Who is it?" mummers Street Preaching Maniac.
"Hellsing" says Alucard, in a board fashion.
"Come in… and take a look at this!" Street Preaching Maniac shoves a large silver cross in Alucards face.
"Oh please…" Alucard slowly raises his hand gently flicks Street Preaching Maniac in the face, sending the hapless author flying into the wall, killing him instantly.
Alucard pulls out his Jackal and points it at Soviet Man.
"Any last words, author" smiles Alucard.
"You remind me of Captain Scarlet"
Alucard loads his gun.
"Crap"
BANG!
Concept for previous sketch by Street Preaching Maniac.
Chapter 5 preview.
(Seras begins to speak)
"Next chapter on Mary Sue…"
(Andrew buts in)
"Want to go to the church?"
"What?"
"The Library?"
"What are talking about?"
"You'll find buried treasure!"
"How dare you talk like that to me!"
"Such a difficult girl, eh Adam?"