Chapter five: Lily's confusion:

Lily turned and struggled, it was the fifth time today that Snape was looking at her. What does he want? He has been fixing her, studying her the whole week, if not longer… He was up to no good, she was sure of it…

Sirius was sitting at the common room next to the fireplace, (thinking about Remus, of course). Lily approached him, "What's happened Evans?" "Nothing the usual" said her sadly taking the sit beside Sirius.

"James uh?" asked Sirius blinking at her confidently.

"Kind of" purred her. Sirius smiled, she was such a beautiful girl, pity he didn't like girls!.

"He likes you, I am sure he does"replied him trying to conform her.

"Do you know if he is dating someone?" asked her impatiently.

"I don't know.." said Sirius frowning, he wasn't sure, he has been so "busy" with his "heart's problems" that he hasn't notice anything but maybe.. "I'll ask him"

"Thanks"

"Can I ask you something?" said Sirius after a hesitation moment, he really needs to ask this to someone and somehow Lily seems to be the perfect person right now. She nodded, what does Sirius want?

"How do you know you are in love?"

"um…" considered her for a moment, "I think cause you can't live without that person, cause you think about him/her all the time and his/her indifference makes you unhappy"

"What if you like that person let's say physically but you don't really care about her, you know what I mean?" said him with an embarrassed face, it wasn't easy to talk about this thing, you know!

"I guess it's not love Sirius, maybe it's just passion.. Can you live far away from that person? I mean, Will you life goes on normally without her?"

Sirius considered that for a moment…. Um… He could live fine without her, yes he could… but what about him?

"What if I care but I don't fell anything physically, at least not most of the time"

"Then is friendship"

"Friendship" if you care, "Passion" otherwise, um… he shocked his head, he could agree with the passion thing, but the other wasn't just friendship, Grrrrrr why is love so confusing!

At lunch the marauders didn't talk to each other, everybody looked at them suspiciously… Remus didn't show up and ignored them at potions and transfiguration' class. But James and Sirius understood he was totally out of his mind when Remus practically snapped at Snape in front of everybody else, the Slytherin got so surprised that forgot to curse or hex the smaller usually kind boy in front of him. Though he made a mental note to hex him next time!

"Prongs can we talk?" asked Sirius to James later that day, James was studying in a inter-house common room, he didn't fell like studying at Griffindor common room right now, better not find Remus today!

"Sure what's up? Wanna talk about Remus?"

"um.. not we better discuss him later…"

"yeah….better… so, What is it then, Life, love, girls?" asked James blinking at Sirius but fails in forcing a happy smile, they were both too worried about Remus.

"Lily?"

"Ah… her"

"I though you like her mate, she's really sad about your indifference. Don't you like her anymore?"

"I do Siri, I do" sighed James, He really likes her but he was kind of going out with someone else.

"So?"

"It's complicated, you won't understand"

"I see" said Sirius utterly hurt.

"Sorry, it's just … well… I don't want to talk about it"

"I though we were best friends"

"Yes we are, but… you have your secrets too, right? I mean you are in love too and you haven't say

with who"

Sirius blinked, James had a point, but he couldn't tell him who he was in love with, James will never understand, he wished he could talk about his problems with James, but he wasn't going to understand, he was sure... He nodded and left sadly, somehow their friendship was breaking, "Sorry mate" though both boys in unison, their secrets were splitting them apart…

Lily was looking for James, after Sirius' conversation she needed to find him. She wasn't sure about what to say or what to do, she just wanted to see him. She finally found him but he was obviously lost in his own thoughts.

"Hi" said her breaking his concentration, he turned and smiled. She felt something melting inside. He was so dam sexy…

"It's her" though him coming back to reality, how could he doubt it even for a second? It was her the girl mean to be his.. she was so beautiful and special, he definitely has to be with her!.

"Hello" tried her again, James blinked and came back to earth.

He slides a hand in her face, and got closer to her, not words were needed cause words are useless when feelings exists…. His eyes fixed on hers, she shivered with realization, her dream was about to become true. She closed her eyes, making clear he had free access to her. Her lips were trembling, he was getting closer and closer, she could fell now his warm breath, his lips hardly touching hers, heaven was so close…

"Get a room Potter" a cold silky too dam familiar voice broke the charming moment. Lily opened her eyes, James was already far, looking at Snape. Unconsciously she took James' arm; a fight was the last thing she wanted now. But James was still, not attempts to take his wand or fight.

Tension was on the air, James and Snape were fixing each other, not words, not movements, it was almost as if they were talking with their glances. Lily got scare, what was that? They didn't know each other good enough to talk through glances, but then hate was a powerful feeling…

"James let's go" said her pulling James out. He walked out smoothly, didn't try to stay. She gave a last glace to Snape and her heart shrinked, what has she just read in Snape's eyes? Was it…? No, it couldn't be, but she was sure, she knew that glance, he was jealous? But why?... um….Well that would explain his odd behaviour, he has been fixing her lately after all… But he couldn't like her, could he? No, of course no, but that was a dam confusing glance nevertheless…

"What was all that about?" asked her minutes later to James, who has been too quiet all the way back to the common room.

"What?"

"Snape and you" said her with a worried look, wasn't it obvious what she was talking about?

"There's not Snape and me" snapped James back. Lily flinched; she hasn't meant it that way, why was James so defensive?

"Sorry I need to go, see you" said James coldly, leaving a hurt and confused Lily!.

Next day….

At the library Lily, Peter and Remus were studying quietly. Remus was a little bit in a better mood, at least with Lily and Peter, though he couldn't stand James or Sirius yet. Sirius was sitting in another table not too far away, eyes fixing Remus. Remus ignoring him of course. He was about to start his charm's homework when Sirius snored loudly. "Snape" said Peter with a casual tone. To Remus though was kind of a personal insult!.

He didn't bother to look up he knew what was coming next. "There he goes" went on Peter "Following the Slytherin as usual" causal tone again, but Remus had to hold himself back to not slam the other boy, didn't he know how much those words bother him? Maybe he did…

James entered the library a minute later, he headed straight to his friend, if Moony was still mad at him he wasn't going to bother.

"Where's Sirius?" he asked when nobody look up at him. Somehow Lily's indifference made him fell sick…

"Potion's section" answered Remus coldly.

James headed to the potion's section, maybe Sirius could help him with his problems… obviously Remus was still angry at him, not to mention Evans!.

"Why did you do that? Snape is there as well!" asked Lily incredulity to Remus.

"So what, they have no secret between them beside they probably are a happy trio!" snapped Remus and left.

"What was he talking about? What trio?" asked Lily puzzle.

"Don't ask" said Peter, leaving as well. Library was not going to be a save place in a few seconds…

THREE…

At the potion's section a Slytherin and a Griffindor were unaware …

TWO….

That another Griffindor was arriving…

ONE…

……

ZERO!

"SIRIUUUUUUS?" James voice echoed loudly…. Peter smiled to his own cleverness, yes he has been right, library wasn't a save place anymore…