Elmo Uncut
Scene – Elmo's House
Zoey – Thanks again for inviting me and Big Bird over Elmo.
Elmo – I have a little surprise for after we have something to drink. But it will only work if Big Bird's a girl.
Big Bird – I'm a girl as of two weeks ago. The wound is still there. Now I'm petrified of saws.
Elmo – All done with your drinks?
Big Bird – Yes.
Zoey – Done.
Elmo – My bed is up this way. Everybody remember their safe words?
Big Bird and Zoey – What the hell are you talking about?
Elmo – Just how I like it. Here, everybody needs protection, for the kids' sake, so take these pads and condoms.
Zoey – Wow! Elmo, I had no idea you were so big!
Elmo – No shit I'm big! I can't believe you didn't notice before. I wasn't wearing pants!
Narrator – That night the three of them got drunk and did a three-way marriage. True love indeed.
Written by:
Neo123454
and
Itako-no-Anna Kyoyama