"Any other business?" Mr Middleditch asked looking round the room.
He'd just concluded, a mercifully short, briefing. Mr Harper had unfortunately been taken ill over the weekend with flu so the threat of an imminent inspection was for the moment postponed. Luke looked around the room, nobody was meeting his eyes, not even Gordon. Although that was probably because he wasn't meeting anybody's eyes, he seemed to be preoccupied with something.
Not for the first time Luke felt a pang of guilt. He'd intended to go over and see Gordon Saturday evening but what with everything that had happened it had completely slipped his mind. That wouldn't do, he made a resolution to go and see Gordon tonight. However, back to the issue at hand, while he didn't want gossip and speculation this present situation had gone on long enough, it was time to put a stop to it.
"I've got something to say," Luke began just before Mr Middleditch could end the meeting. Out of habit Luke stood up, tiredly he ran a hand through his hair. "There's been a lot of rumours flying around about my . . sexuality."
Lizzy and Stella exchanged a glance, slightly surprised that he was addressing the subject so unabashedly, this was the moment of truth time.
"I'd just like to clear a few things up. I am not and never have been gay. The fact that I don't wish to go out with anybody here is my choice, one I hoped you would respect." Everybody remained quiet at that, the tension in the room could have been cut with a knife.
Luke smiled slightly putting a few people at ease. Stella who nearly always spoke her mind was itching to ask the question that was on everybody's lips. 'You're not married, you're not seeing anybody, you claim you're not gay, you have women practically throwing themselves at you, what's your problem?' For once though she kept her mouth closed.
"Thank you," Luke finished, walking out of the room. He never had liked being centre of attention, particularly now it brought back to many painful memories of times he wished he could forget.
That day was very tense and very difficult but somehow Luke made it through. By the time it came for him to go home, he wanted nothing more than to do exactly that, but he hadn't forgotten the promise he'd made that morning. He'd got to Gordon's doorstep and knocked before he realised that he didn't have a plausible excuse for being there. However, it was a little late to back out as Gordon opened the door.
"Luke, what do you want?" Gordon asked in surprise. Luke opened his mouth, not sure why he'd expected Gordon to be welcoming, particularly as he was here to fix the mess that he expected to be Gordon's personal life, but he had and now he was at a loss for words. Gordon stepped out on to the porch, partially closing the door behind him, unconsciously moving in front of the gap so Luke couldn't see inside.
"I er . . I," Luke struggled, he was normally so good at coming up with excuses on the spot but this time his mind had gone completely blank. Gordon seemed to sense his discomfort and felt badly about it, it wasn't Luke's fault that he didn't want anybody coming around his home.
"I'm sorry, my wife isn't feeling well," Gordon lied, "I'd invite you in but she really isn't well." Luke nodded in an understanding fashion. This visit might have been short, and considered by some to be unproductive, but at least it meant he'd pinpointed the source of Gordon's problems. All he had to do now was research.
"That's fine Gordon, I'm sorry to bother you. See you at work tomorrow." Gordon nodded, so relieved that Luke was leaving that he didn't pause to wonder why he'd actually come round in the first place. Luke walked back down the garden path and out into the street. His earlier tiredness had now dissapitated, his wish now was not to go home but to do something, anything. He decided to leave his bike where it was, it would be safe there until morning and he could pick it up on his morning jog. Instead he started walking the four blocks to the nearest pub. As he rounded the corner on the last block he bumped literally into Jill.
"I'm sorry," Luke apologised helping Jill to her feet.
"That's ok," Jill replied instinctively. Neither of them had realised yet that they knew each other. It was dark on that corner, the streetlight having long given up. It wasn't until Jill turned her head and looked Luke in the eye that they recognised each other.
"Jill," Luke's eyes softened and he made no move to stop holding her hands with his own, an action that wasn't lost on Jill. "I didn't know you lived round here."
"I didn't think you did either," Jill replied, Luke smiled, the warmth of which almost made Jill shiver with the promise of spending more time in the company of this man.
"Can I buy you a drink?" Luke asked gesturing to the pub down on the road, "Or perhaps dinner?"
"Dinner would be nice." Luke smiled and reluctantly let go of Jill's hands so they could walk down the road, instead instinctively his hand traveled to the small of her back.
He'd been at the royal for nearly a month now, it had taken him that long to pluck up the courage to talk to Jill on something other than a professional level. Intellectually he knew that there had been no need to wait that long, it was just he'd been hurt before, badly hurt. He didn't think he could bear the pain again, there was a saying that lightening never struck twice but even now he wasn't sure he was ready, or willing to take that risk. To get that close to someone again. That time might be a long way in the future for him and Jill, in fact it was a time that may never come but he'd taken the first step tonight, on the road to that happening.
Luke ushered Jill into the Chinese restaurant, it was a place he'd found a week after arriving in Elsinby, he'd been a regular ever since. The tables were all set for two, the lighting was low and the mood intimate. Eating there alone had been less than fun but the food had been good, it was only now that he was there with company that he realised how miserable it had been.
"So . ." Jill wasn't sure where to begin the conversation. The question that had been on everybody's lips since his announcement that morning was now on her lips too, only now she'd changed it slightly in keeping with the current situation. 'You're seriously good-looking, you're not married, you're not seeing anybody, you turn down offers from half the nurses in the hospital and now you've invited me to dinner. Those factors do not add up, what are we missing?'
"Tell me about yourself?" Luke picked up the conversation, making good eye contact as he took a sip of water. 'Doing everything in fact that women wanted a man to do.' Jill noted, 'There has to be a catch somewhere. He can't be good-looking and sensitive too.'
"I'd prefer you told me about yourself, you're very mysterious Luke." Luke looked uncomfortably down at his empty plate. There were some things in his past that he didn't want to share, things that would blight any new relationship.
Of it's own accord his hand reached up and slipped under his shirt, reaching for the necklace he wore, the necklace that gave him strength and hope, the necklace that in all honesty had saved his life. Jill watched the action, puzzled by the secrecy and not entirely sure she was comfortable with it. Being private was one thing, having barriers up at the vaguest of questions was another.
"I er . . I grew up in London," Luke began, he could skip the bit's he didn't want to tell. It wouldn't be lying, it was just being creative with his answers, everybody did it, you just left out parts and embellished a little on others. It wouldn't matter and nobody would ever know. "My father's a doctor . ."