Disclaimer: Since when have I owned Harry Potter?
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Strange but True: When Joanne Rowling created Harry Potter, her publishers decided to credit her as J.K. Rowling because they worried that boys wouldn't read books written by a woman.
HARRY POTTER AND THE PRISONER OF AZKABAN COMES OUT TODAY!!!!! (gets her money out of the bank and races to the store) YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!!!
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Blue Flowers of Celestial Years
Chapter 12: "Frozen Angel Tears"
The first snow of the season fell softly, like little white flakes. Ginny remembered her mother telling her once that snow was actually frozen Angel tears that fall to comfort people who are hurting in their hearts. Right now, Ginny did not know how much more she could take, and she needed those frozen Angel tears to comfort her more than ever.
Seamus, with a heavy heart, broke up with poor Ginny because he thought that she was not happy with their relationship.
Ginny did not blame him because she had never paid any extra attention to him, so she nodded sadly in understanding.
"Seamus, can you kiss me one last time before we start being friends again?" Ginny asked; she needed to feel someone else's lips because she needed to forget.
Seamus gave into her request and he kissed her softly. Ginny almost cried when she felt them; they were nothis lips. They will never be his lips.
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Ginny finally got enough guts to get out of her dorm room to go to the Gryffindor common room. That was the hardest part; getting strength. She seemed to be lacking strength since her last conversation with Remus.
At the thought of Remus, Ginny had to choke down the tears. She should not feel this way! She is Seamus Finnegan's girlfriend; she should not have feeling for a man twenty years older than herself! Yet she could not help but feel horrible about everything.
She told him she is in love with him, and he denied her. Ginny took in a shaky breath and forced herself to go into the common room. In the room was the terrible trio, Harry, Ron, and Hermione, all talking and laughing as if there were not any hurt people in this world. They were sharing jokes between themselves on the big, red couch.
As soon as she saw Ron, Ginny wanted to throw herself into her brother's arms and cry her eyes out. Ron was the one she was always the closest to because they were practically twins; only a year apart.
To her, Ron was the comfort she always searches for. No matter what happened to them, he will always stay that comfort to her.
"Hey, Ginny!" Hermione greeted cheerfully when she saw Ginny standing off in a corner all alone.
"Hey, Ginners!" Ron greeted with a smile, and then he frowned a bit. "Ginny, are you alright? You look a bit pale…"
Ginny forced a smile, nodded, and laughed at the same time.
"Maybe I should have eaten dinner last night. That could be why I'm pale."
Ginny was laughing, but she felt her eyes start to burn as her tear glands swelled and her eyes filled up with the salty liquid. No, she will not cry! She has not shed one tear until now, and she will not start crying just because Ron the Comfort is in front of her!
"Oh, I think I'm laughing too hard." Ginny said, as she tried to make her sobs sound like laughs and she wiped away the liquid running down her cheeks.
"Ginny, what's wrong?" Harry the Wonder Boy asked.
Ginny opened her eyes again, looking at the trio, each one of them concerned for her well-being. That was Remus' job to comfort her, not their job! Still, their concern for her, touched Ginny, and she suddenly sobbed and ran to her brother, throwing her arms around him.
Ron was bewildered when his sister threw herself into his arms and started crying like she was being torn apart. He held her the way a brother would hold a hurting sibling while he looked at Hermione and Harry, confused, and they shrugged their shoulders, both just as equally confused.
Ginny buried her face into her brother's shoulder. Just for now… just for now, she will cry.
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
"Ginny, are you alright?"
Ginny looked at Seamus who just sat down beside her, looking very concerned. She nodded, looking back at her breakfast as she picked at it.
"I'm so sorry, Ginny." Seamus continued, looking guiltily down at his hands. "I'm sorry I made you cry."
Ginny put a comforting hand on his shoulder and allowed her hand to pat it. She gave him a small smile, shaking her head a bit.
"Its alright, Seamus, its alright. I'll get over it… Hey, how did you know I cried?" Ginny demanded, trying to get herself back into character.
"Well, a few nights ago, Harry and Ron talked to me… well, more like Harry talked to me while trying to hold Ron back from attacking me. Ron told me you-you cried for hours. I did confirm that I broke up with you, and he yelled at me. But I must say, I deserved it, and I'm sorry. Your brothers, Fred and George, also sent me a little, um… 'present.'"
"Oh, my brothers are such gits! What did Fred and George send you?"
Seamus blushed and rubbed the back of his head with his hand. He tried to avert his eyes away from Ginny.
"Nothing!" Seamus quickly answered.
Ginny blinked, wondering what it was her brothers sent her poor ex-boyfriend, but she uncharacteristically let the matter drop. Ron, Harry, and Hermione came in the Great Hall, and when Ron saw Seamus he gave the worst glare that could have put Lucius Malfoy to shame.
"Ron…" Ginny said in a low voice, although it still held its warning.
Ron did not harass Seamus for once, but just sat down with Hermione and Harry flanking either side of him. As everyone became interested in their breakfast, Ginny went back to her own, but soon felt one persons pair of eyes watching her.
No, she won't look! She won't look!
But Ginny looked up at the staff table, knowing who was watching her. Sure enough, her brown eyes met sad, crystal-blue eyes. For one brief second, which seemed to last forever, Ginny read Remus' soul before he snapped his eyes back to his breakfast. He, like Ginny, was also depressingly picking at her breakfast.
Was Remus suffering as much as Ginny had been? But then why would he deny her love if he felt the same way towards her? Suddenly, the answer came to her; Remus was a man of honor. He can not just say, "You love me? Well, I love you, too! Let's run away and get married!"
That kind of man only exists in trashy romance novels that Ginny's mother loves to read all the time. Maybe that was why her mother and father have seven children; they were the results of romance novels.
Hey, it was only a theory.
Ginny smiled in spite of herself, feeling his eyes on her once again. Will she ever get over him?
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
The weeks to Christmas continued on, and still the snow fell. Quidditch season was over, much to Harry's depression, and still Ginny had not gotten over Remus; he did not look that well either.
Ginny grades had taken a sharp fall; she was not in danger of failing, but she put in enough effort to maintain a passing average, but she did not push herself as much as possible. All of her teachers were concerned, with the exception of Professor Snape, of course, and they reported to Dumbledore. The Headmaster looked over Miss Wesley's grades, and he agreed to talk to her…
There was a knock on the door, and Dumbledore said that person may enter. The old man looked up with a twinkle in his eyes.
"Ah, Miss Weasley, please take a seat."
Ginny did as she was told, her face still held the uncharacteristic solemn look. When she was comfortable, Dumbledore waved his wand and a bowl filled with lemon drops appeared.
"You want one?" Dumbledore offered with a smile.
Ginny silently shook her head to decline; she did not want any lemon drops. She did not want anything but to be left alone. Dumbledore studied her for a minute before speaking.
"Miss Weasley, your professors noticed the change of attitude in yourself and your grades. I saw your recent grades, and I am worried about you just like them. Please, Ginny, tell me if anything is bothering you."
"Nothing." Ginny said, looking at the lemon drops.
Dumbledore tilted his head a bit, studying the young redhead.
"Are you sure?"
Ginny looked at those blue eyes and she hated them because they were so kind and full of life. Her eyes were once like that, too. Ginny silently nodded her head again.
"Ginny, have you heard of Dementors?" Dumbledore asked after a moment of silence.
Ginny looked confused by the question, and she nodded her head.
"Dementors, as you know, make a person feel horrible and down; basically depressed. I remember a time in my youth when I suffered the dementor syndrome, and I can tell you first hand that it is not a pleasant feeling."
"Dementor syndrome?"
"Yes, it is when one is depressed, yet there are not any dementors around. That same unhappiness and hopelessness can be experienced even when a dementor is not with that person."
Ginny knew what the Headmaster was talking about, and what he was saying she was going through; depression. Her energy was sucked away from her, and she no longer cared about anything. It truly is a very, very awful feeling.
"Sir, I always wondered where dementors come from. Do you know?"
Dumbledore sighed sadly and nodded his head, and folded his hands together.
"Dementors were once people; a witch or wizard that was so depressed that they hated the world. It is the kind of depression where it is so severe that the person often took drastic measures; they took their own life. That depression was so deep in their soul that it blackened it. And that is what dementors are; Soulless, miserable creatures that try to seek some kind of happiness and comfort that they prey on other peoples' happiness."
Ginny nodded, finally understanding the origins of dementors.
"Now, Ginny, pray tell me, what causes your dementor?"
Ginny looked out the window. Although the sun was out, the snow was still on the ground; such beautiful weather.
"Sir… have you ever been in love before?" Ginny asked before she could stop herself. "I'm sorry, sir, that was a personal question."
Dumbledore smiled and, surprisingly, he nodded.
"I may be old, Ginny, but, yes, I have been in love before. Twice, in fact."
"Honestly?"
"Yes, honestly. The first time was a professor of mine; she was very beautiful and well-liked by all the boys in Hogwarts, but it was I who told her how I felt. She, of course, did not return my affections, but told me that I will one day find someone who suits me. When I became a Transfiguration professor, a sixth year student told me about her affections for me. I returned them, and when she turned seventeen, we secretly got married."
"HUH?!" Ginny gawked at the fact that the 'Perfect-Wizard-And-Will-Never-Think-Of-Being-A-Pedophile,' Headmaster of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, would even think of secretly marrying a student!
"Yes, and we are still married to this day." Dumbledore said with a smile of warmth.
"Who… who is it?" Ginny asked, half afraid of the answer.
"Professor Minerva McGonagall."
Ginny almost fell out of her chair at that answer. McGonagall and Dumbledore are MARRIED?! Secretly?!
"But-but-but-" Ginny stuttered, her mouth gapping. "Aren't you… a hundred years older than she is?!"
"No, I'm only eighty-five years older." Dumbledore answered with a smile.
This time Ginny fell out of her seat, twitching on the carpet floor.
"Ginny, are you alright?" the Headmaster asked, standing up in his chair as he watched poor Ginny twitch like a fish out of the water.
Ginny forced herself back into reality and she got off the floor, and sat back down in the chair; she brushed her robes off as Dumbledore sat back down in his seat.
"What I am trying to say is," Dumbledore began on a more serious note. "I know love can be painful, but we do move on; or, we get that love returned in time."
Ginny blinked at the Headmaster as he gave her a friendly wink. She gulped; did he know?! If he did, then he did not seem to mind it much. Ginny nodded in agreement, knowing that she probably will never get that love returned.
"You may go, Ginny, and try to have a good week. After all, next week is the holidays."
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
It was a full moon that week, before the holiday vacation. Remus was in the backroom where he usually was when his transformations occurred. The wolf, Romulus, was growling in the back of his mind.
Romulus had been very angry with Remus for pushing Ginny away. He claimed her! It was not Remus' right to ignore that and push his mate away!
I know what you're thinking, and you can say it. Remus said to Romulus, mentally sighing.
I was going to say it anyway even if you said I could or not! The wolf growled, snapping his jaws.
The full moon was just a few moments away, and Romulus' form would come out, but his mind will stay locked because of the Wolfsbane. Yet Remus could feel the potion slipping away as Romulus paced, his temper flaring at the young whelp, waiting to be released.
You dumb ass! Romulus snarled, the Wolfsbane potion ebbing away; it was not going to hold the wolf back tonight. How dare you do that to her?! What right do you have?! Did you not stop for one moment to think that a wizard's lifespan is much, much longer than a muggle's lifespan?! In the wizarding world, you are still considered a pup!
If that is true, than Ginny is considered a baby. Remus retorted.
You know what I mean, you insolent whelp!
Remus closed his eyes as the full moon came out, shining her blue light on the world below.
I'm going to rip you apart, Remus. The wolf growled, laughing cruelly. I'm going to make sure you suffer for what you did to my mate.
Then lets transform so you can get on with it.
After that was said, Remus opened his eyes, looking at the moon. His body changed, transformed into that beautiful, brown-coated wolf with calculating golden-yellow eyes. Romulus blinked, looking around the room.
Remus was in the back of his mind, still cautious, and still there. Romulus snarled at his brother. Scream, you fool!
True to his word, Romulus tore their body apart, but he transferred the pain to Remus. Although Remus cried out in pain, he did not even attempt to stop the wolf; he deserved it. Remus felt like he deserved every bit of it because of his rejection towards Ginny.
Ginny…
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
It was the week of the holidays, and the remaining students were able to got to Hogsmeade; even if the remaining students were only Harry, Ron, Hermione, and Ginny.
"Ginny!" Molly Weasley cried when she saw her daughter come into the Weasley's Wizard Wheezes shop.
She threw her arms around her daughter, practically strangling her in a tight hug. Molly pulled back, looking at Ginny to make sure she was real.
"Oh, Ginny, I'm so sorry about the Howlers!"
"Mom, are you feeling okay?" Ginny asked, wondering if her mother was running a fever; Molly never apologized for sending Howlers.
"Yes, dear, I am. Oh Ginny! When I heard about the Hogsmeade attack I was so worried and then your father tells me that you were attacked by Death Eaters and you were missing and I kept on thinking about how I yelled at you those two times for mistakes that were not your fault and then your father tells me that a werewolf attacked you and then we find out that the creature didn't attack you and that your wounds were just the cause of the Cruciatus Curse and then I start crying because my baby was tortured just because she is Harry Potter's friend and… oh, Ginny, I'm so happy you're alive!"
"Mother! Breathe!" George said, amazed that anyone could say all that in one breath.
Molly inhaled chokingly and hugged Ginny again.
"It's okay, mum, I'm alright… thanks to Remus."
"I'm just so happy you're alive! I would've came to visit you sooner but the Order has been so busy."
"Busy with what?" Ginny asked, tilting her head to the side a bit in curiosity.
"Nothing, Ginny; its nothing that concerns you."
Ginny scowled; it is amazing how a mother can go from being "super mum" to the "worst mum alive" in 5.3 seconds!
"Do you have more Order subjects to discuss? If so, then I will leave."
"No, we don't right now." Fred exclaimed, playing with a new product.
"Tell us how you survived!" George said, practically jumping up and down like an impatient child at Christmas.
"Actually, it was the Fire Sucker that saved my life."
Fred and George beamed proudly at their sister as their mother burned sparks at her sons.
"You sold her a Fire Sucker even though they're against Hogwarts' rules?!" the short woman demanded.
Fred and George's smiles did not fade; in fact, they brightened more.
"Well, mum, we actually gave it to her for free when she was at Diagon Alley before she knew the rules." Fred said.
"Plus, it saved her life!" George concluded.
Molly glared at her sons, and then shrugged in passing.
"Alright, I'll let you pass this one time, but next time…" Molly left that threat hanging.
"We know, we know…" the twins said dully as if she said the same threat their whole lives. "You'll crucify us."
Suddenly, Bill Apparated in the shop, and he jumped when he saw Ginny. He suddenly hugged his sister tightly as if he was afraid she would die on him.
"Ginny, I was so afraid!"
"I'm alright, Bill; I'm alright."
Bill let Ginny go and he looked at her to make sure she is real.
"Yes, you are alright." he smiled.
"Bill, has something happened?" Molly asked, knowing that he son would only be here for an emergency.
"Well, last night was the full moon..." Bill began, and then wandered off in his sentence before he picked back up again. "Lupin is in the hospital wing; apparently, his werewolf form tore him apart."
Ginny's heart sank to her stomach and rested there. Remus is being hospitalized? As Bill gave what little details he knew, Ginny slipped out the door and out into the cold weather. She did not know how to react to this news.
Could it be that Remus was suffering just as much as she was?
Ginny did not know why she would end up inside a jewelry shop, but she was there, standing in all that expensive jewelry.
She looked at all the gold, silver, and bronze medals in awe. There was no way that she could afford even one of them!
"Hello, Miss," a store clerk greeted Ginny. "How may I help you?"
"I think I took a wrong turn in here.... sorry."
Ginny was about to leave when the store clerk said, "Hold up there, Miss! I think there is something you can afford."
The man reached onto the shelves behind the counter, pulling down a dusty golden box. He opened up and revealed a beautiful gold symbol; it was a circle, split four ways, and a small circle in the middle where the four lines meet.
"It's beautiful!" Ginny whispered in awe. "What is it?"
The man hesitated in telling Ginny what the symbol meant.
"Well, that information made customers retreat from buying it; but, I'll tell you."
The store clerk cleared his throat, preparing to tell a story.
"A while ago, I forget how many years ago, there was a man with gray hair and old, tired eyes that came into my shop. He gave me this symbol and asked me to sell it to a redhead girl because she might find a use for it. He said that this symbol is the sign of a great spirit that guides the wolves. I never saw him again; so, Miss, will you be willing to buy this despite the meaning?"
Ginny looked at the symbol as she reached into her pockets....
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Remus coughed and he woke up only to end up staring at the never-changing roof of the hospital wing.
"Mr. Lupin!" Madam Pomphrey exclaimed, rushing to his side. "You're alright! Oh, thank Merlin!"
"How long was I out for?" Remus asked with a raspy voice.
"About three days. It's now the holidays and the children have gone home, save for a few, of course."
Remus nodded and was just about to go back to sleep when Pomphrey woke him up.
"Mr. Lupin, you have a Christmas/get well present beside you."
When Pomphrey left, Remus took the gift and noticed a card underneath. He reached over and cautiously sniffed the envelope.
Remus' eyes widened when the sent sent off bells in his mind. He knew that sent; even if he never smelled it for the next one hundred years, he would always remember that sent. He turned the envelope over, opened it, took out the letter, and read it:
Remus,
I was told that you were in the hospital wing; I was also told the meaning behind this symbol and I thought it would be a great Christmas and get well present. I hope you get well soon.
Blaithin
Remus read the name again and again, breathing in the sent that is so familiar to him. Blaithin.... blue flowers. Ginny.
Remus opened the wrapped present and was shocked, to say the least, to see that particular symbol in the box. He thought the Wise One had it. The wolf fingered the symbol and felt Romulus' anger towards him calm to a less dangerous level.
Ginny.....
n.n.n.n.n.n.n.n.n.n.n.n.n.n.n
Lucky Shamrock: Thank you for the complement! The only reason I know so much about DNA is because of my mother, who is a lab tech, so yea… Thank you for your review!!!!!!!!
Remusgrl01: Um, well, Romulus did knock some sense into him… in a way… Thank you for your review!!!!
brokentoy19: Lol! Well, we can only hope he would do that, huh? Thank you for your review!!!
Bonbons: Well, thank you. Since I'm on Thanksgiving vacation, I might be a bit late on updating, and I'm updating at my workplace; I might get in trouble with the boss (gasp)! Thank you for your review!!!
Andromida-1971: Yes, everything is always backfiring on poor Remus. About the werewolf colony… you'll "see" it in the sequel to this fan fic. Yay. Thank you for your review!!!
Dangerous Soul: Yes, love tends to do that, and poor Remus is not an exception. How Remus gets himself out of this mess will be in the next chapter. Yay. Thank you for your review!!!
Branmuffinpower: Well, Remus kissing Ginny was a "mistake" on his part, and… (gives branmuffinpower a year supply of tissue just in case she wants to cry). All of my friends and I, with the exception of that one mental case who is a big Harry/Hermione fan, think you are very cool. By the way, what is Parody? Thank you for your review!!!
Tante: I'm a huge angst fan, and I have wrote quite a bit of Inuyasha angst in the past. I'm attracted to angst; I'm so weird! No, I don't have any favorite artist renderings of Lupin. Do you have any suggestions? Thank you for your review!!!