THE RAILWAYS END—CHAPTER FOURTEEN
In which we examine the lost life of an old man
A page's uniform is taken out
The Committee acts
And we are reminded of man's cruelty.
Love is an art, and Desire—depending on its mood—considers itself to be a Dadaist.
It lives in the Threshold—its body, in all its beauty.
Capillaries form long winding tunnels, leading to a heart like a cathedral, eyes full of vitreous humor, and the dark pathways of the brain. The eyes face the sky, arms stretched upwards as if in exultation—of what only Desire knows. The lips smile, as if greeting an old friend or a lover.
From a distance, the Threshold resembles a doll with its arms positioned upwards.
Wandering the vast maze of its body, empty of all life except itself, Desire's existence is a lonely one, devoid of the contact she commands in humanity.
Have you ever wanted something, whether it is the buxom redhead in the next office or the latest romance trashy novel?
Then you have heard the voice and felt the touch of Desire…
Kozo Fuyutsuki had no idea when he lost his humanity.
Perhaps it was an evolutionary thing—a slow erosion of his empathy as he moved forward in his career, beginning with turning a deaf ear toward the screams of small animals tormented by a colleague later dismissed for "abhorrent behavior," to saying nothing when the son of his favorite former student was abandoned in the street. He had experimented and lectured for many years without his conscience being troubled, content in his life, while feeling the common disappointment that everyone feels when they did not rise any further.
The Vice-Commander of NERV was walking slowly through the cages where the EVAs were stored. It was late and he was alone. The cameras were shut off at his order—something like this had to be done without anyone watching; there were enough whispers about the alleged mental instability of the NERV supreme command without anyone finding a video of him in silent conversation with a large purple giant.
His short strides stopped as he stepped into the Unit-01's cage. He gazed at the side of the massive head. Fuyutsuki then walked around so that he could face the Evangelion from the front, head-on.
The introduction of Yui Ikari and Gendo Rokubungi into his life was the most likely point when Fuyutsuki's existence had been twisted beyond recognition. She was a nice young lady, a brilliant scientist who had wandered into a project—and a plan—that concerned the forbidden, something that any worthwhile researcher salivates over. He was an oddity even then, a powerful mind trapped in the body of a thug that routinely sneered at humanity. If anyone had told Fuyutsuki that these two people would someday be married, he would have laughed in that person's face. The idea was ridiculous because Yui was…well, Yui; and Gendo was…quite frankly, Gendo. The woman was a delightful soul who never drank if she could avoid it and dazzled people with her warm personality while the man was a heavy drinker and smoker who had been involved in half a dozen bar fights by the time he met Yui.
And when Gendo was around Yui, deep down, the professor feared for her.
Rokubungi was emotionally stunted, and love was something unfamiliar to him. He did not know how to return the feeling properly or understand that it could be a very complex thing. The professor was certain that—hell, most of the staff was convinced—Yui would soon realize her mistake and move on. When she did so, how would Gendo react? Would he refuse to let go? Stalk her? Perhaps even kill her, so no one else could love her?
And then they wed.
The truth about Second Impact was revealed to the old man. He was horrified, shocked to learn that he was ankle deep in a monstrous conspiracy; one that included Yui as a guiding light. He threatened to go to the government; to expose them.
Gendo thought that it was his words that convinced Fuyutsuki to stay silent, and cooperate. That was fine, since the Commander's reaction to the truth might be unpredictable: it was Yui that stopped him, who pleaded with her old teacher to go along with the plan.
How she got involved with such a bloody endeavor was one of the great mysteries flowing through his mind. Perhaps it was the cold logic necessary to a scientist's career that muddled her conscience. Perhaps Yui felt sufficiently detached from humanity that she could easily do things to hurt her fellow beings in the name of helping them. After all, a doctor causes pain when he gives a flu-vaccination to a child, but it is all for the best in the end.
Things changed when Shinji appeared. Up to then, Yui had been focused almost entirely on the project; when the baby arrived, she first took off weeks to take care of the boy and see him settled in. Then, as time passed, her office was plastered with pictures of the baby Ikari. Photos of the entire family were rare, as Gendo was putting in just as many hours as ever.
The Commander's adultery disappointed the professor, but it failed to surprise him. Gendo just seemed incapable of understanding that certain things were expected of him now that he had a wife. That Naoko Akagi was the subject of the affair was also not surprising. She was a cold woman who wanted power, but somehow…
Poor Ritsuko. The good doctor tried so hard to distance herself from her mother, but she was failing. Simply dyeing her hair wasn't going to change it; she still had the irrational feelings for Gendo that her mother possessed. The Akagi women were independent enough, by the standards he had grown up with; but sometimes Fuyutsuki almost expected to see a collar and leash on the scientist. It was…disturbing, to see how Gendo could command such affection when he seemed incapable of it. It seemed wrong, like taking a blind person to an early Charlie Chaplin film and watching them laugh. Wrong, all wrong.
And now, Shinji Ikari was dead.
He had tried to remain indifferent to Gendo's treatment of the child, buried himself in work and the details of the prophecies in an attempt to not see the boy's sad eyes, not to imagine the wails of an innocent, not to see Shinji's face—Yui's eyes and features—twisted in grief.
Dammit, the world was not supposed to work this way! Gendo had plenty of options, why was the only correct one the choice that caused such pain?
Kozo Fuyutsuki walked toward the other end of the catwalk, eyes glued to his path. Change was in the air; he was old enough to smell it; it was just like Uncle Teroshi had told him all those years ago, when young Kozo had innocently asked about the melted flesh on his face: "We were too stupid to realize what had been going on, until that fireball came."
NERV's existence—its power—relied on the fear of both its servants and the people outside of it. It was a mistake to bring the boy: he was a crack in the foundation. Few things are as powerful as hate and disgust, and the Commander had inspired a firestorm of repulsion. Gendo Ikari's fate was no longer the same; Kozo understood that, even if the Commander did not.
As Fuyutsuki left the EVA cage, he suddenly realized that he did not know what to fear the most.
On Shinji Ikari's third day in service to Dream of the Endless, he had been given a royal page uniform; a pure white jacket with gold braid and lining, black trousers with a gold stripe down each leg, black bowtie, excruciatingly polished black shoes, and white gloves. One of the strangest parts of the uniform was a bizarre emblem that was emblazoned in gold on the lapels and above the gold cuff lining: it looked like an insect head, with something resembling a spine extending from where he assumed the mouth would be.
The boy hadn't worn it very much; he had been summoned with it to one of Dream's audience chambers twice, to serve as an attendant during the Oneiromancer's conversation. Shinji made sure that the uniform was well kept, as he had decided that the Dream King's servant was supposed to appear respectable.
The same rules did not apply to Daniel, though. While dressed in a white oxford, t-shirt, and pants he had a long conversation with a teenager with spiky black hair and a small ponytail. He was even barefoot.
Though he wore more formal clothing when he met a young man with a golden horn extending from his head, the Dream King wore the clothes of a teenager just as much as he wore the long robes of a true king.
Today, Dream wore a white kimono with gold phoenixes on the breast. The emerald now hung on a thick gold necklace—rather like the kind found on Egyptian royalty—and had taken on a smooth oval shape.
The now open-aired audience room had been perched at the top of a tower jutting over the castle (and a few clouds) from which the vastness of the Dreaming could be appreciated. Large marble columns wrapped with ivy emerging from plants with a rainbow of flowers planted around the exterior of the dome roof. The dome itself had a silver dove statue planted at the top. The exterior of the structure was painted with scenes from what appeared to be medieval war, only there were men and women floating over the battle, hurling gold lightning bolts at each other's side.
Dream sat in a thick wicker chair with white cushions, his ankles crossed over his sandal wearing feet. Over a glass topped table he faced a girl around Shinji's human age with gold eyes and dark brown hair wrapped in a bun on the side of her head with a braid in red ribbon descending down past her neck. She wore a simple white kimono with a crimson sash. Her right ankle was delicately webbed with another red ribbon.
"I wonder if there is something you may tell me, Dream Lord," she said in the fashion of a teenage girl hitting her father up for a credit card.
"And what would that be, Lady Miyu?"
She smiled, "There is a boy in my music class…"
Dream held up a hand; he had an "I-am-not-amused" look on his face.
"Those are your affairs, good lady; they are yours to manage and conclude as you will…although I believe that your subjects also have something to say about these matters, do they not?"
The girl frowned and crossed her arms in a pout.
"I was refused a few weeks ago. It is so unpleasant to force humans to forget; so wasteful. It is much more beautiful to…drink…and give them…happiness."
She picked up the crystal goblet at her right hand and held it out to Shinji for a refill of the mysterious red liquid that he had served her.
Gloved hands clutched the decanter that contained the guest's drink and maneuvered its spout to her waiting goblet. When he had finished pouring, the girl quickly gripped his left forearm. Shinji looked at her porcelain hand and then glanced nervously to the emotionless Daniel.
"What about this one?" she asked with a small smile, "He has all the marks of a tortured soul…"
A star burned brightly in Dream's left eye and he frowned.
"He is beyond your power, Miyu; his blood will not quench your thirst. He is one of mine now."
Miyu stared at Dream for a moment, her hand still clutching Shinji's arm. Then, reluctantly, she withdrew her hand from the boy's person.
"My apologies, Lord Dream…"
There were no more incidents during the rest of the audience, and soon enough she vanished, answering the summons of a "Larva". He was following Daniel down a flight of stairs that hung freely out above a valley beneath the castle's perch.
"Where was she from? Miyu, I mean…"
Daniel continued a few more steps, finally stopping on a landing that overlooked a Germanic village. He clasped his hands behind his back and looked over his realm for a moment before answering.
"She is from a Nippon distant from your own homeland. She has…a heavy responsibility."
Shinji watched his lord turn in a swirl of white and descend down the stairs again toward his castle. Confusion kept him from immediately chasing the Dream King, but he quickly made his way after the immortal.
"A distant Japan? What does that mean?" the boy gasped out as he continued after the striding Daniel.
"Simply what it is," Dream said, as if it were the most common thing in the world, "A Nippon far away from the one you know; similar in many ways but completely different in others."
Shinji was amazed.
"You mean there's another Tokyo-3?"
A sound echoed in the back of Shinji's mind. The boy knew, somehow, that it was a soft chuckle; Dream spoke as much by a mixture of thought and human comprehension as he did with a voice.
"There is," Daniel replied, sparing the boy a glance over his shoulder, "A great number in fact. Each unique in their own fashions."
"And me?"
Dream paused and turned his regal face to the boy, studying his servant with two stars—a bright green in color—acting as pupils.
"You…do exist in these lands," Dream said, with a reluctant undertone, "In various forms. Some events you experienced have happened to your brother-selves, up to a point. Others have experienced much more…"
Shinji was confused again. He dared to look into Dream's eyes, averting his own after a half-second.
"What do you mean…?"
"It is not given for ones such as yourself to know what might or might not have been."
"But…"
"Enough," Dream said sharply, his right eye's star blazing rays out beyond the night-darkness of his socket, "Return to your apartment, Shinji. There are some matters that require my attention…and besides," he continued softly, "I believe there will be a guest waiting for you."
The Lord of the Nightmare Lands smoothly waved his hand and sent a wide-eyed Shinji to his fate.
Two days of work had brought Kiel to this moment. The papers grasped in his hands—reports from the Committee's Research Department—had driven away most of the shadows that had suddenly gathered around the Human Instrumentality Project.
One of the Committee members knocked out of the sky by pigeons; two of our British government agents murdered in their offices; ships with vital parts vanishing; scientists losing memory. Now, all these things can be made irrelevant.
In a dark room, eleven monoliths appeared.
"Gentlemen," Kiel began—amid everything else, SEELE was the ultimate man's club, "Our first order of business is to first thank Members Six and Three for their wise recommendation. I assume everyone has received a copy of the new translation?"
Everyone had, and the Chairman began to read.
"'In the southern lands of Ethiopia, there was born to the House of Ras-Need-Ma a boy, who was named Alosmo. He was strong in body and soul and dreams.
"In his fifteenth year, Alosmo lay down in his house and dreamed. In his dream he saw the face of his mother and father, who slept in the rooms above him, his brothers and sister, and his betrothed. His dream showed his family shouting at him, calling his name.'"
Kiel took a breath; here was the most powerful part.
"'And then Alosmo was in the presence of the one that his people called Kai'ckul, the Lord of Sleep. Kai'ckul, who was known as one beyond the gods of the people of Alosmo, placed his cloak around the boy and said unto him: 'Know that your heart is good and that mine weeps. Duty and responsibility to all the peoples of your earth command that your life be ended this night. Forgive me; my heart protests, but my honor has spoken.'
"And Kai'ckul reached into the dreaming Alosmo's body and took his heart and the life of Alosmo was no more. When the village awoke, they saw the body and there was great weeping for many days.'"
Kiel laid the document down and put his hands together. A true grin threatened to spread across his face; he could feel the goal of his life within his reach.
"This is—like the texts that we have already read and put into motion—a mere summary. Further research on the Dead Sea Scrolls indicates that this story is much more than a fable.
"According to the Scrolls, the boy Alosmo was in fact the subject of a bizarre fluctuation on the psychic plane. He did not merely see his family in his dreams: they were transported into his sleeping world, unwillingly, by his condition. Also, there were signs that the phenomena was beginning to spread to other parts of the village, including Alosmo's friends and other relatives. The Dead Sea Scrolls describe this as an 'Annulet'; another appropriate word would be vortex, I believe.
"The effects of this Annulet are impressive in both terms of power and rapidity. The Annulet basically invades other dreams and draws them in to form a large combined dream. If allowed to run unchecked, the Annulet will eventually draw in every dream on the planet."
"What does this have to do with us?" asked SEELE-10.
"A great deal, since our goal is Human Instrumentality," said Kiel. Not even the insolent question of the monolith labeled 10 could offset his good mood.
"Though we have all seen evidence of psychic phenomena such as telemetry, telekinesis, and telepathy—indeed we use some of these in the machines that we have built—what the Dead Sea Scrolls describe is incredible. During the period when a human being slumbers, electrical activities are at their lowest level. The mind is at rest, allowing excess information to be disposed of.
"The Annulet is able to not only link with sleeping minds, but is able to gather them all into one plane of thought. It is no coincidence that the interpretation of dreams is considered an important part of psychiatric work, since our psyche is completely naked in our minds; after all," Kiel allowed a grim smile, "Who can spy on dreams?"
There was silence in the chamber for a moment as the rest of SEELE considered his words.
"Chairman, you do have excellent observations," SEELE-3 said, "Do you have a plan on how to turn this…Annulet to our advantage?"
"I do," Kiel replied, "And then we will no longer have any need for Ikari, his NERV or his Children."
A wave of approving murmurs swept across the chamber.
"The Annulet, my comrades, is an Instrumentality in of itself. It is different, exists on an intangible level, relies on one person, but it is Instrumentality nonetheless. Our biological technology has enabled us to tap into the human brain and use its power to our advantage. With an Annulet under our command, we can turn the focus of our machines on to his brain and harness the power. We will be able to manipulate humanity's minds into Instrumentality: first the mind, then the body."
There was silence in the chamber. It certainly was a different strategy, one with less apparent risks than trusting Gendo Ikari. But one question was on everyone's mind.
"Where can we find an Annulet?"
SEELE-3 had spoken for the entire committee…except Chairman Kiel.
"It is interesting you should mention that. I have already taken positive steps in that direction.
"I recently reviewed the report of the Third Child's death…"
Major Misato Katsuragi had been sober for weeks and her driving had still not improved.
Doctor Ritsuko Akagi knew that her friend's skills at the wheel had always been erratic, and no amount of time away from beer would ever greatly affect that. But Misato used to speed around corners like she was piloting a fighter in a dogfight and race the turn of red lights.
Dr. Akagi was sent forward and than back by the stop of Misato's car. She looked up to see that the light had finally turned to red; if the Major had been her old self, she would have been merrily racing on her way by now. But today, when Ritsuko wasn't doing it, Asuka would lean in from the back seat to remind the Chief of Operations to drive over twenty-seven, to keep the peace in Tokyo-3's traffic.
Did I do this to you, Misato?
Ritsuko shook her head and stared forward. It wasn't her fault that the Major was being hounded by sorrow and guilt. Not her fault that ever since Shinji's death a dark cloud seemed to settle over NERV. It most certainly wasn't her fault that Gendo hadn't slept with her since…
"We're here," Misato said tonelessly.
Tokyo-3 cemetery consisted mostly of black tombstones, organized into rows, resembling a ghoulish army marching into formation.
Today's synch test was a quiet affair, and afterwards Misato, Rei, Asuka, and Ritsuko had bundled into Misato's car to visit Shinji's grave. Touji was originally going to accompany the three women, but Ritsuko had replaced him as his sister was demanding to see him. Misato had agreed, but had still regarded the blonde coldly. Dr. Akagi did not return the look; she knew that she had failed to live up to Misato's standards for bearing grief over Shinji's death: tears; gloomy looks; arms around the Major's shoulders; fucking the boy's surrogate mother and then crying over the boy with her (that one was reserved for Kaji, judging from what she had heard); cursing the Commander and his uncaring nature; and visiting the grave at least once a week.
Ritsuko walked behind the other women; this was more a time for them than for her. She looked out over the vast cemetery. Thousands of human beings lay here. God alone knew how many families they had left a gap in.
Yet the graveyard was almost always empty.
Ritsuko's thoughts were interrupted by a shriek.
"No! No, oh God, no! Nononono…"
The blonde scientist turned and hurried toward the sound, which continued to wail in an almost animal, wounded manner.
Rei stood beside the screaming Misato, who had fallen to her hands and knees. The Major was trying desperately to escape the grasp of Asuka's arms. The redhead was holding Misato back, tears streaming down her cheeks. Rei was taking in large gulps of air, and her eyes were shining with salty water. Misato tore at grass, clumps of dirt flying behind her as she pulled at Asuka's embrace.
Ritsuko stepped forward and, to her credit, did not scream.
However, her eyes did widen and her teeth bit into her tongue, bringing an iron and coppery taste into her mouth.
Shinji's grave yawned open, as if it had been there forever.
His coffin was gone.