Chapter Fifteen

Keori

I'm not exactly the most normal of people, y'know? I mean, other people have a family, parents, a home. I'm not saying that I'm alone in being alone but I'll bet no one has a supernatural bitch living in their skin, trying her damn best to kill you. Akuma, that's what she calls herself, is the reason I don't have a family or a home anymore.

See, my dad was a medium sorcerer with dreams of something bigger. Problem? He's got the skills but nowhere near the power needed to reach the level of someone like Li Kuan, the strongest eastern magician at the time. But he didn't let that stop him. My dad was a collector of tomes that even the darkest sorcerers feared to touch. Looking through them one day he found this nifty little dark magic that would let him achieve his dream. Yeah, my dad was an idiot. He didn't believe in 'what goes around comes around'. He was never much for the theory side of magic; always about the power was my dad. The thing is that saying was the most basic principle of magic. Heck, my mother, who had no magic, could've told him that this was a big mistake. And she did. Not that my dad listened.

Ironically enough it was a moonless night when he performed the spell. Even now I still don't know what the spell was supposed to do. But I know it involved a lot of blood and a heck of a lot of dark elementals. The result of the spell was Akuma. Her name should've given him a clue, but no, my dad just had to order around someone whose name means 'devil'. First thing she did? She sucked out his soul, then my elder brother's, and finally my mother's. Luckily - or not, depending on your view - my mother was pregnant with me at the time. That was how I survived. Sure, Akuma killed mother but she couldn't touch me since I was an entirely separate being with her own soul. Unluckily, Akuma remembered she needed a host. Guess who got chosen.

I didn't put up much of a fight. Hey, I was still a baby at that point. So I got possessed by the wicked witch of the west. Then she used some of the power she gained from my family to accelerate the growth of my body till I looked like a seven-year-old. On the upside, I had the mental ability of a seven-year-old too.

It was a bit of a shock I can tell you. Going from a baby who can barely see beyond a foot to a child who can see everything clearly can be very unsettling. Especially if the first things you see are the dead bodies of people who resemble you.

I survived though. Akuma wouldn't let me do anything else. We burned the house down and left town that same night. No one ever knew that one person had survived the fire. The next few years are kinda boring. Akuma kept whining about some Angel chick when she wasn't pissed off about a guy named Yue. We just kept looking for those two the whole time. I got by because of my innocent look. People felt sorry for us, fed us, clothed us, and sheltered us. Some tried to fuck us but Akuma killed them. I suppose I should be grateful to her for that.

The entire time I've been living with her has been a battle. Even though she wanted me alive, Akuma constantly fought me for my body. Every day was a fight to remember that I was Keori, not Akuma; that I'm something beside the host of a bloody thirsty demon. She overwhelms me sometimes, particularly when my emotions are out of control. It's becoming a lot harder now, now that we've located the Angel. She wants out; she wants to kill her counterpart. I think by the end of this I'll either be dead, or lost. I suspect I should be a lot more worried about those two prospects but all I can think of is...

...Will anyone mourn my passing?

Touya

"Hey, bakamono." That's my usual greeting for Sakura. And like usual, she goes red and stomps on my feet.

Since she turned five we've had this routine everyday of our lives. Nothing's changed in nine years and I doubt it'll change in the next nine years. Yuki might be right, I might have a sister complex for all I know. I don't call it that though. I'm just protective. I have a reason to be. Sakura is a klutz, naive, and too adventurous for my liking. She just can't seem to get it through to her skull that not everyone is as nice as her. She takes it so personally when someone rejects her. She's always been like this so I can't blame anything or anyone for it...as much as I'd like to.

She'd go greet a new neighbour and they'd tease her because she seems so simple-minded. I always ended up defending her when that happened. She just couldn't understand that people will hurt you simply because they can. Even after numerous incidents like that rejection just seems to wash over her and disappear into thin air. Then mother died. Things got worse. Dad was never around long enough to see how it was affecting Sakura and me. I dealt well with it, but only because I could see mother. Sakura didn't deal so well. She just got quieter and quieter. I suppose she always wondered if it was her fault.

But she got better after a while. So did dad. Sakura met Tomoyo, I met Kaho and Yukito, and dad had us. Things got a lot better. When Sakura started becoming secretive in fifth grade I started getting worried all over again. Sakura wasn't the most stable of people; she's too emotional. At night I'd hear her speak to someone in her room, or I'd see her take a huge piece of cake into her room at midnight. I would've interfered right away but mother assured me it was all right. So I did nothing.

Finding out that Sakura was a 'Cardmistress', whatever that was, was a big shock. I suspected something was up though, especially when I saw that girl that looked like Sakura but didn't feel like her. That stuffed toy of hers was also suspicious. Still, it was a surprise. Even more shocking was finding out that Kaho was a moon priestess who was there to guard my sister. Yukito adjusted far quicker than me. He just smiled and went on as if nothing was wrong. For all I know he might not have noticed that anything really was wrong. Yukito can be pretty oblivious that way. It sounds pretty mean to talk that way about my best friend but I don't pretend that Yukito has no faults. He has plenty; one was that he had a soft spot for Sakura. That's probably why he ended up nearly getting hurt in that last 'test' of Sakura's. I don't blame him for that; I would've done the same if I had been in the same situation.

I think it was only because of her connections of people that she didn't retreat when dad died. Oh, she cried and cried but at least she wasn't keeping it inside. I always suspected that Yukito asked her out because he felt sorry for her, or at least it started out that way. Sakura really depended on him and Tomoyo during the funeral week. Maybe that's when Yukito started falling for her, the heck do I know? I just know that was when Sakura decided that she needed to be stronger on her own. She wanted to stand on her own two feet. Tomoyo understood and stepped back but poor Yukito didn't. I don't pretend to know the entire story but I don't blame Sakura for dumping Yukito, just as I don't blame Yukito for leaving Japan. I'm just the older brother, right? Just the older brother who watches out for his sister and stays out of the way.

Lately though things have been strange, strange enough that no matter what Sakura may want, I'm going to get involved. How involved? Well, involved enough that I'm going to kick that Yue guy's arse if he doesn't get his act together. The stuffed toy's worried about him too and that really says something. Keroberus might not be my best friend but I know he's looking out for Sakura too and any enemy of my enemy is my friend.

Unfortunately, right now I can't do anything. I'm still the watchful elder brother. If Yue screws up again though...

Eriol

This is definitely a dream and a fascinating dream at that. After all, one doesn't get to talk to one's previous incarnation everyday.

I smile at him, not at all surprised to see the same smile reflected back at me. Clow Reed and I look far too alike in my opinion. "Hello Clow."

"Hello Eriol. How are you?" We are seated in a garden beside a small lake. Behind me, I know, is the house that Clow lived in while creating the cards. It was a beautiful Tudor house with bright colours and ivy tailing down the walls. A pity that it didn't last through the world wars. For some reason whenever Clow wants to talk to me, he always brings me here. I suspect that this place holds sentimental memories for him.

I shrug, choosing to give a non-committal answer. "As per usual. And you?"

He laughs. It's eerie how much he sounds like Fujitaka when he chuckles. "I'm merely the memory of a dead man, Eriol."

"Indeed," I agree, "However memories are as full of feelings as any other living being." It could not be helped. I always manage to get into small debates with the man about everything. If Meiling could hear me now she'd turn up her nose and accuse me of being too stubborn for my own good. I must say, I agree with her on that one.

A small amused smile graces his face at my words. He nodded to concede the point to me before moving onto other things. "Speaking of living beings, how are my creations?"

This was a routine almost. Every time we talk Clow manages to circle around to his creations. He worries for them, hence why a part of him still hasn't moved on. I can understand his feelings; I too worry about Nataku and Spinel Sun. But Clow shouldn't worry. Sakura is a wonderful mistress who truly cares for Tsuki and Kero. However, that isn't what Clow wants to know. He is as aware of the physical realm as I am; he knows very well what is going on. "Tsuki and Kero are fine. However, both are more than a little worried about the appearance of Akuma and Yue..." I trail off, watching him for his next move.

"Ahhh, Yue, the Purple Moon. I suppose he's very upset with me?" He cringes as he says this confirming my belief that he was well aware of how his actions had contributed to the situation.

I keep smiling. "Oh, yes. In fact he seems to be at odds with nearly everybody bar Sakura. Did you plan it this way?"

He sends me a startled look. "Gods above, no! I planned to eventually get rid of Akuma and, with any luck, keep Tenshi in this realm. The escape of Akuma then Tenshi was not part of my master plan I assure you. Of course, Yue getting involved with Tenshi was also not part of that. I rather wish I could have told him why it was such a bad idea to get too attached to her, but he always was the more rebellious one."

"Rebellious?" I repeat. Admittedly Yue was not the most friendly of beings but he didn't seem so much rebellious as lost.

Clow nods in answer. "He might seem like a meek little puppy all alone and lost, but underneath all that mildness is an absolute brat!" The last is said with vehemence but I know him too well.

"And yet, you did everything in your power to ensure that he could continue to look for the Angel unheeded."

A wince. "Hmm, yes...well...it seems that you've found me out," he says with a wry smile, "Does he know?"

I shake my head. "No. I don't plan on telling him either. I don't think it would change much of anything if he did. It's best really that he continues to believe what he does."

There is a sad sigh that escapes him when I finished. "True. Things will unfold as they will regardless of our intervention. We are the most powerful magicians in the world and yet...we are forced to do nothing while people suffer because of fate."

"Everything is a test of fire, so to speak," I reply, "They will be stronger when this is over, you can be sure of that at least. They will be hurt, that is inevitable, but when the flames die down they will still be here. They will still be alive and sane."

"How I wish I could believe that, but I fear Yue might be consumed. He is not the most rational being at the best of times. Neither is Kero when it comes to Yue. Tsuki will be dragged into the flame by virtue of her connections to them. For all I know, they might be far too hurt to even contemplate the thought of repairing what little they had."

I stifle the sudden urge to laugh. How true. Yue and Kero are certainly not rational, not even on their best days. "Don't worry Clow, Sakura will heal them."

My laughter fades at the knowing look tempered with sorrow that he sends me. "Ahh...But who will heal her?"

Akuma

Who decided that I was unnecessary?

Who decided that I had to be destroyed?

Who in the world woke up one day and said 'all evil has to be destroyed'?

I have as much right to be here as much as the Angel does. I am a part of the human psyche too. I am part of life itself but those naive fools that call themselves 'wise magicians' tried to destroy me. Especially that Clow Reed. That man irritated me to no ends. I knew that he was planning on destroying me. I knew that he was trying to find a way to keep the Angel in this realm. I also knew about Yue's little obsession with the Angel. The moon is always attractive to anyone with magical inclinations, and the cards are no different.

I don't suppose they ever found out that I was the one who freed the Angel. Yue had a very important part to play and I couldn't have him hovering around Clow Reed, especially if that resulted in him becoming the Judge. I needed him far away from Clow, enough that he would no longer be the judge. The future is an open book to me and I know that if Yue remains as the Judge, things will go very badly.

I don't hate Yue. It's impossible to hate him. He aggravates, irritates, and angers but he has never inspired hatred. The Moon soothes everybody and even though Yue is now of the Star sign, he was and always will be, of the Moon first. He retains everything that constitutes a Moon guardian but has the added powers of a Star guardian. Lucky boy, the best of both worlds in his hands. With all the charm of the Moon at his beck and call, how could I possibly hate Yue? It's true I need to kill him because if I don't, the Angel will win but I don't particularly want to hurt him.

Pity that he and I are on different sides.

Even more of a pity that he's so obsessed with the Angel and that girl. Neither the Angel nor I can exist in this world as corporeal beings. We are pure energy and we will only burn out our hosts. The girl that I occupy is close to disappearing, her body worn out by housing me. Is the same happening to that Sakura girl? Probably so. What will Yue do when he discovers this? He should have known from the beginning that he can never have the Angel. Any relationship between a Card and a Guardian, or a mortal for that matter, can only end in tears. I could almost pity him. Almost.

Things are coming to a head and not even I know how it will end. I have played my cards and so has the Angel, now only Destiny is left to show her hands. Will that hand favour the Angel or me? No one knows, we can only wait for Destiny to catch up with us.

A/N

1. Does anyone actually remember who I am, considering that I disappeared for close to a year?

2. Does anyone else feel like nothing's making any sense? 'Cause I'm confused.

3. No frickin' idea where I'm going with this so yeah...