Okay backies!

Thanx 4 the R&R. You guys probably know how great it feels to have someone like your work so... I won't waste time explaining how warm and fuzzy I am.

I noticed that there were a few reviews which asked "Dent?". I'll explain. It's sort of a nickname/insult.

"Dent thickhead"

"Dent Dant (short form of Dante)"

... My own attempts at a humorous and witty insult. Oh well...

The moment his head hit the pillow, the phone rang.

"Shit." Rubbing his eyes, he rolled onto his stomach and picked up the phone, "Devil May Cry - we're closed."

"Hey Dent." Dante flinched. There was only one person who'd dare to call him that...

"What the... "Dent"? Don't tell me your seriously writing a self-insertion?"

I ground my teeth and smiled,

"Since you asked so nicely... no. Just sit down, wait and shut up!"

He sat down abruptly, giving me his famous "glare-that-could-melt-butter". Virgil elbowed him sharply,

"Taking orders off a mortal? How... sweet."

"I don't exactly see you rebelling at the moment, brother dear."

"Why should I? We get along just fine." He smiled smugly.

Lucia and I exchanged glances. It was obvious that Virgil saw an opportunity for being a star in one of my fanfics. The only thing I had to decide was; would I be able to do it? Lately, I'd been thinking about making a sort of change in my writing. I wanted something different from other DMC fanfics, even something different from a self-aware story such as this one your reading right now...

"Wait a minute." Trish frowned, "You're telling me this is a story too?"

Yep.

"Alright already." I turn around and glare at the author, "My story. Bugger off!"

Fine then. Have it your way.

"Thankyou." I pause and thing for a moment, "As I was saying; it's not a self-insertion. Why would I write myself into a story simply so I could fall in love with that?" I jerk my thunb in Dent's direction. He shrugged,

"Because of my rugged good looks and boyish charms?"

Trish, Lucia and I sigh and put a hand over our eyes simultaniously. Suddenly, the silence in the room is interrupted.

"We are falling. The night is calling..."

Trish reddens slightly,

"Uh. I'll be back." She grabs her mobile from her pocket and ducks out the door. Lucia turns to me,

"Alright. Why does she get truetones?" She put her hands on her hips. Virgil grinned,

"You know, you're cute when your angry."

"Smile at me like that again and I'll paste you across the wall."

"Children." I raise an eyebrow, "Behave."

They both settle for glaring at each other. Trish pokes her head back in the door,

"That was DarkTyrant. I should go, he's got writers block."

I shrug,

"You sure you wanna give this one a miss?"

"I'll be fine. He's writing me a solo piece.She smirked at Dante. He shrugged nonchalantly,

"Whatever."

She disappears again through the door and I go back to my typing...

"Trish. What lovely surprise." He hoped he counded cheerful, but it was hard to sound like you enjoyed reality when you were half-dead with lethargy.

"I have a little surprise for you."

Dante groaned,

"Not now Trish."

The woman on the other end of the phone sighed,

"No, not that sort of surprise. I have a body."

Silence.

"And?"

There was silence.

"A dead body." She emphasised 'dead'. Usually when she did that...

"You want me to check it out." It was more a statement than a question. Ever since he'd broken up with Trish, she'd tried to find as many excuses as possible for them to 'meet'. For being so cute, she was damn clingy!

"Trish." Dante sighed and rolled onto his back, "Trish, Trish, Trish. I've just come back from a-"

"Look Dante, I frankly don't give a fuck, but I have a body here and..." She paused, "It's outta my league." She finally admitted.

Dante thought for a moment, his body savoring the precious rest that it was getting and knowing that it would probably be the last it would get for a while. He rubbed his eyes again,

"Describe it to me."

Trish took a breath.

"Um... it was a man."

"Was?"

"Was. Arms 2 and 10 O'clock, legs 12 and 3-"

"What? How-"

"Head 7 O'clock-"

"Wait a minute. What the hell are you talking about?" Dante leant on one elbow on the mattress, fully alert now.

"He was ripped apart Dante, and from the look on his face... he was enjoying it."

Dante plonked back down on the pillows and groaned again,

"Ok. You win. I'll come down."

"Oh, and we have a witness."

"A wit-... Jesus." Dante rolled off the bed and picked up his shoulder holster, "Give me ten minutes."

Walking down the stairs, he picked up the damp clothes that he'd discarded earlier.

"I hate Mondays." He noticed that the cat was gone. Apparently it had decided to make it a short stay and left. Dante grumbled to himself as he slammed the door shut behind him,

"I hate every day."

Virgil reads what I had written and bursts out laughing,

"How cute, you've made him an Emo."

Dante stands up and pushes him out of the way,

"What? Move over." Whilst he's reading what's on my computer screen I crack my knuckles again.

"You'll get arthritis." Lucia takes a sip of her coffee. I shrug,

"Meh. My fingers are getting cramped from all this stopping and starting."

"Ayebee." There's a note of tension in his voice as he puts a hand on my shoulder, "As much as I cherish our friendship-"

"Don't touch me." I glance at him. The hand immediately disappears,

"Sorry. As much as I cherish our friendship, I don't think-"

"I knew it!"

Lucia snorts into her coffee cup. Virgil simply smirks. Dante, however, is starting to get irritated,

"Can I just say that the story is in serious danger of turning into an Emo/Angst spiel?"

"I know." I say cheerfully. Oh, it was such fun to piss him off! "Just-"

"Let me guess," He says drily, "Sit down and wait?"

I smile sweetly,

"There you go, you were wrong; you do think."

He hadn't needed directions; the small sense of direction in his head told him where Trish was - after all, she was a Demon, and he had a talent for finding Demons. Trish was... he'd like to say unique, but only in personality. She'd been created in the image of his mother - which was deeply disturbing since he'd been sharing a bed with her on a regular basis for a period of six months. However, that had turned out to be nothing. Once the big danger to their lives was gone, he'd finally realised just how irritating she could be 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 5 weeks a month, 12 months...

You get the picture.

He shuddered as he turned down an alleyway, then suddenly had to screech to a stop before he ran over someone. Turning the bike 90 degrees whilst braking, he shook the mist out of his head,

"Sorry Trish."

The redhead 'humph'-ed but didn't say anything other than,

"You want your body?" She jerked her head towards a pile of clothes, "There's your body. I'm outta here." She started walking towards her car. Dante frowned,

"But... the witness?"

"Just screwin' with ya." She smirked and climbed into the car. Dante could have happily throttled that little bitch, but restrained himself from chasing her down. She'd probably take it as a come-on. He instread tried to concentrate on the dead body lying on the slightly steaming cement.

Put bluntly, and graphically, he had been torn apart. Limbs were all strewn akimbo and had shreds of tissue still hanging from them. The man had been in his late 30's, roughly, but did seem to have a look of ecstacy on his face.

So what he was dealing with was a very twisted Demon that like ripping apart her suitors whilst... jerking them off? Either twisted or... original. Dante noticed the security badge on the man's arm and it suddenly clicked that he must have been guarding something. Something of extreme importance to the Demon if she had gone to this length to eliminate any witnesses.

He sighed and crounched next to the guy. He was assuming that the offending Demon was a 'She'. There were very few Homosexual Demons out there, and thankfully he hadn't met any, though he had read about particular individuals...

He shivered and looked around for any sign of a key or something that would give a clue as to what he'd been guarding. The wet pavement was streaked with blood and rain. A small way from the mans... largest portion of body, was something small and... furry?

"A feather." Dante groaned.

He has Limb-ala-security guard and a feather to work off. Next time he saw Trish, he'd kill her. No ifs, no buts. Truly.

He ran a hand through his hair and stood up, thinking to himself. It may have simply been a random attack; a security guard on the way home from a mall, sees a woman offering her 'services', presumes she's a prostitute and goes off alone with her then BAM. Phallocentric Sushi.

Nah. Too simple.

The alleyway looked like something out of a comicbook. With the stereotypical dumpster, newspapers trapped against the barbed wire fence, cardboard boxes lining the brick walls to the high buildings and garbage bins overflowing onto the street. For no particular reason at all, Dante noticed the name on the boxes;

Karat Jewellers.

He grinned. Bingo.

"Ugh!" Lucia makes a face, "Ugh, I think I'm gonna be sick."

"Graphic violence... gee that's a change." Dante sighs and yawns. I smile sarcastically,

"Ahaha. You're sooo hardcore."

"I know."

Grumbling to myself, I turn back to the computer. Behind me, Virgil breaks the silence,

"I actually like it."

"You would, wouldn't you?" Dante jibes.

"It sets atmosphere." Virgil ignores him.

"Like Jack-the-Ripper. Gore's your sort of thing isn't it?"

"What is your problem?" Lucia stands up suddenly. Virgil rounds on Dante too,

"Isn't anything that she writes good enough for you? You should feel lucky that you even get to be in her writing." He finishes spitefully.

"Guys." I rub my temples. They don't seem to hear me.

"It's not my fault I'm a good guy." Dante's eyes glitter, "Unlike some people I know."

"And just what's that supposed to mean?" Virgil suddenly get's poisonous. Lucia decides to give this argument a miss. Dante had definately hit Virg on a soft spot.

"Guys?" I try again. Again, I'm ignored.

"Have you ever noticed how you're always the bad guy? Doesn't that say something about what people think about you?" Dante put his boots on my window seat.

"And just what does that have to do with you not liking Ayebee's writing?"

"Guys." I raise my voice a little. Still no effect.

"Because," Dante says matter-of-factly, "You're only sucking up to her in the hopes that she'll write something about you. Something where you get to be the hero for once. Not gonna happen, Virgy."

"You self-assured, son of a-"

"That's it!" I swing out of the computer chair and turn on Virgil, "Give it a rest, alright? I know you're insecure! Everyone can tell! That's why he" I fling an arm out in Dante's direction, "Is able to tick you off so easily!"

Virgil takes a small step back,

"But-"

"And you!" I swing around to face Dante, "You are singularly the most arrogant, stuck-up, male-chauvanist bastard that I have ever dreamed up! I don't know why I even started writing about you! I don't like you! I can't stand you!" Lucia scrambles out of my way as I storm to the door.

"As long as you two are still fighting like... like... the pair of apes that you are, I'm not typing ONE MORE WORD!" I slam the bedroom door shut behind me.

Silence fills my bedroom, the walls still shaking from the impact of my door hitting the doorframe. Lucia and Virgil look at each other, then glare at Dante. He looks up,

"What did I do?"

OMG! Will they ever finish the story?

To be continued...!

P.S. The next few submissions will sort of be half-chapters, 'cause I'm going on holidays and won't be around a computer much…

… and no, The Dent is not coming!… Virg is ;)