A/N : Thanx for all the reviews; Freezyboncoolipants, Kez, SpikesDreamer, Moonjava, spuffy4eva, RoleModelGirlie, Moluvsnumber17, PltnmDancer, wigi, pixiecorn, Rowan Rice, sheilamarie, SpikeAngel-Lover, Lindsay, Time Rowanwood, GoldenAngl88, Ape18, sexysarah, you guys rock. Now everybody take a deep, calming breath, and remember that I love Spike and the odds of me letting him die in a fic are pretty much zero. Now read on ;-)
(For disclaimer, etc. - see chapter 1)
Chapter 16
"No, no, not my Dad, no" Becky cried, tears streaking down her cheeks as she hugged her mother. Buffy was barely sitting up in bed, her eyes staring straight ahead unseeing as Giles told her the man she loved could be dead within hours.
"I'm so terribly sorry, Buffy" her father-figure told her, obviously feeling the two girls' pain, "We had no idea the demon would sense the ritual and when it came..."
"Is it dead?" the Slayer asked flatly, interrupting his ramble, "The Joh'ran, is it dead?"
"Yes" Giles nodded, glasses still dangling from his fingers, "Spike was incredibly brave, he killed the demon despite...despite his suffering" he explained.
"He can't die Mom" Becky sobbed into Buffy's shoulder "We can't let him die"
Though she wished she could, the older Slayer couldn't say a word to comfort her crying child. She had no words, barely any feelings over what was happening. She was numb to everything, and she wished to remain that way. If she let her emotions run wild as they'd like too, the pain would surely kill her
"...Willow and Tara are doing their best to find a cure" Giles told them gently, "We're taking it in turns to call regularly, but so far I'm afraid there is nothing"
Buffy wasn't truly listening, wasn't even thinking clearly as the words sunk in. Spike could die, was almost certain to and there was nothing anyone could do to save him now. He meant so much to her, as she did to him. They'd come so far from the worst of enemies to such committed lovers. He was the father of her only child and together they were a force to be reckoned with. How life was meant to go on in any kind of normal fashion without him there beside her, Buffy had absolutely no idea.
The memory that forced it's way to the front of her mind right now and would not leave her be was such a simple little scene she was almost surprised she recalled it as well as she did. It was a single night, years ago as she'd laid on the couch snuggled in her partners arms as they watched some movie on TV. Becky was asleep upstairs and the house was quiet, the gang had taken patrol tonight and the world seemed calm around them. With the slightest concentration Buffy could see it all so clearly and hear the words that had been spoken...
"That's so sad" Buffy gasped as she watched the two lead characters in the movie on TV walk away from each other. The guy went back to the woman he was supposed to marry, leaving the woman he'd spent the whole movie having fun with all alone.
"Stupid wanker" Spike scoffed, "Fella's blind if he can't see the other bird's a whole lot hotter than the one he's marrying" he said incredulously as Buffy looked up at him with wide eyes, "He didn't even shag the bint before he gave her up"
"William Blackwell, I am appalled" the Slayer told him, swatting him across the chest.
"What?" he asked, not getting it, "Just callin' it how I see it luv. No bloke with any balls is gonna let her walk off without at least trying to..." he trailed off when he saw the look in her eyes. She wasn't exactly happy with his point of view.
"And of course love and loyalty have nothing to do with it" she rolled her eyes as she sat up straight, pulling out of his arms. Spike rolled his eyes when she folded her arms and stared grumpily at the credits scrolling on the TV screen.
"Bloody fantastic" the vampire complained, "We have a difference of opinion and you're gonna be bleedin' pissed at me all night, is that it?"
"No" Buffy told him without looking at him, "It's not like I expected you to understand romance" she muttered, but of course with vampiric hearing he heard her.
She was stupidly surprised when he got up and stormed away. She'd at least expected him to stay and argue not just leave her to be grumpy all by herself!
Buffy shut off the TV and was deciding whether to go find the gang on patrol or just go straight to bed when she felt Spike's presence as he came back from wherever he'd been.
"What're you doing?" she frowned as he walked passed her to the stereo.
"Not romantic, eh?" he muttered, "You, Slayer, spoil every bleedin' romantic thing I ever plan" he complained more loudly as he put a CD into the machine and pressed play, "This was supposed to be for our anniversary next month, just got it done early is all"
Buffy still looked confused but took the hand he offered to her as music began to flow from the speakers.
"Remember this?" he asked with a tilt of his head as he put his arms around her. She was too thoughtful to remember to be angry and push him away. Suddenly she realised what song was playing - Can't Help Falling In Love With You.
"Oh" she gasped when she heard the lyrics and remembered all too clearly the last time she and Spike had danced to this song.
Back in Santa Monica, just moments before the car journey during which Becky was born, she and Spike had been dancing just as they were now to this song. It was as she'd opened her mouth to confess her new found love for him that she'd passed out from the spell the gang were performing back in Sunnydale. Since then it had become one of their special songs, along with a few others which she correctly guessed were on this CD he'd compiled for her.
"I do remember this" she nodded, smiling by now as they swayed together to the melody, "I also remember we had to stand a lot further apart the last time" she laughed, recalling how her pregnant belly had got in the way.
"No excuses now, luv" he said softly, "Get as close as we like"
Her eyes fluttered closed and he leaned in to kiss her sweetly. It still thrilled her when their lips met, when he touched her, sometimes just the way he looked at her made shivers run down her spine. Taking Becky's birthday as their anniversary, they'd been together almost four years now and it seemed insane to think it'd been that long but it was.
"I could stay here forever" she sighed a moment later, resting her head on his chest.
"Forever's a long time, pet" he smirked, "Reckon you'd get bored of me eventually" he half-joked, still so very uncertain of her affection. He never truly felt like he deserved this beautiful woman or the child they'd been blessed with, but every day he was grateful for them.
"I will never be bored of you" she told him, moving to look up into his eyes as the song changed to Wind Beneath My Wings, "I love you" she reminded him sincerely as they kissed again, "And we will be together forever, cos I don't know if I could go on without you"
Buffy came hurtling back to the present when Giles said her name, clearly he was beginning to wonder about her mental state and rightly so. She hadn't moved or spoken for fully ten minutes as her daughters sobbing calmed some against her shoulder.
"Is my Mom here?" Buffy asked just as monotone as her earlier question.
"Er, yes, everybody is here" her Watcher told her as he stood up from the edge of the bed, "Would you like me to fetch Joyce?"
"Please" the blonde nodded once, "Becky, honey, go with Giles" she said, patting her daughter's back but encouraging her to get up and leave.
"Come on, my dear" the man she saw as her grandfather said gently as he led her out of the door. Buffy's expression didn't change, her body didn't move, not until after Joyce had entered the room.
"Buffy?" she said cautiously as she came closer.
"Mommy" said the shaky voice of a child though it came from the mouth of a grown woman, one of the strongest the world had ever known. She fell forward into her mother's arms and cried as if she might never stop.
"Oh my baby girl" Joyce said tearfully, rocking her daughter back and forth, "I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry" she repeated, crying for Buffy's sake as well as Becky and Spike. They were such a perfect little family, but if a cure couldn't be found and Spike really did die, Joyce wondered how they would all cope. He'd become such a member of the group, so much a son to her.
It was strange to think that the first time they'd met he was threatening to kill her daughter and Joyce herself had hit him over the head with a fire axe! They'd come so far, and yet it all meant nothing now. If Willow and Tara were not successful in their research Spike might not live to see his family again. The very idea of it was unbearable.
"Oh my God" Tara gasped as Willow finished telling her a story from so many years ago.
Back when Faith was the enemy, before Angel had gone to LA, and Spike had left Sunnydale supposedly never to return. The Mayor was Sunnydale's latest Big Bad and his right hand girl was the second Slayer. Faith had shot Angel with a poison arrow, the name of that poison - Killer of the Dead, the only cure - the blood of a Slayer.
Buffy had forced her lover to drink of her to the point where she almost died so that he might go on living. This time that was not an option with the original Slayer having lost so much blood already. There was little chance of Faith volunteering or Angel allowing her to do such a thing if she did, and as to Becky, there was no way Spike would willingly risk his little girl's life. If that much had not been apparent before, less than twenty-four hours ago it was proven as Becky risked herself to protect her father and was swiftly told thanks but don't bother. His existence met nothing to him when bargained it against his daughters. She and Buffy were his world and he would willingly die so they might go on living. It was a beautiful if not tragic fact.
"How can we tell them, Tara?" Willow cried, "Any minute now that phone is going to ring again and one of the gang is going to ask what we know..." she panicked.
"Ssh, honey" her girlfriend tried to calm her, "W-We just have to figure this out, think about it..."
"There's no time to think about it" Willow told her frustradely, "Spike is going to die if we don't do something and the only cure is to lose somebody else, I don't see..."
She was interrupted by the phone ringing into life in the hall. The shouting and the ringing combined had woken Mandy from her sleep and she cried for Mommy at considerable volume.
"Go to her" Tara told her girlfriend, "I'll answer the phone"
Willow nodded dumbly, glancing at the ringing phone before hurrying up the stairs to calm the crying child up there.
"Hello, B-Blackwell residence" Tara stammered as she put the phone receiver to her ear.
"Tara, it's Xander" said the voice on the other end of the line, "How's it going there?"
"N-Not so good" she half-lied, knowing he would assume they'd found nothing, and hating not being totally truthfully. The trouble was she didn't know how to explain what she must.
"Things aren't so great here either" Xander sighed, "Buffy's gonna be okay. She needs some rest but she'll live...Giles went in there a while ago to tell her and the Beckster about Spike...I don't envy him"
"Xander, there's something I should tell" she said as Willow came down the stairs with Mandy in her arms, "We...we found a cure" she said as she shared a look with her girlfriend.
"Tara, that's great" she heard him say excitedly, "I gotta tell Buff..."
"No wait!" she interrupted as she realised he was going to hang up and go back inside the hospital, "It's not as simple as that, it's..." she took a deep breath and closed her eyes so she couldn't; see the pain on Willow' face as she explained, "The poison Spike has in him, it's like what poisoned Angel...It's like the Killer of the Dead" she said, almost whispering by the end, feeling so sick and emotional.
"Oh God" was all Xander could say, "The only cure is..."
"Slayer blood" Tara said softly, "I know"
"Oh God" he repeated, unable to find any other words, "Oh God, how do we tell Buffy that?"
When Joyce appeared from Buffy's room almost an hour after she'd gone in, Xander had imparted the unhappy news of Spike's only chance of survival to the rest of the group when Becky had slipped off to the ladies bathroom. All eyes had immediately gone to Faith, though no-one meant to pressure her, especially since they knew by now that she was pregnant. The happiness over that event was short-lived under the circumstances, and after their conversation about threatening the life of their child, both Faith and Angel knew they were going to let down a lot of people today.
"You guys know we'd do what we can to help but..." the second Slayer paused awkwardly. Always one to speak her mind it was strange and unsettling to see her struggling with her words, but they'd never been in this situation before.
"If it was less dangerous" Angel chipped in, "Maybe, if Faith wasn't pregnant but...you can't ask her to do this, to make this choice, it's not fair"
"Nobody did ask, Angel" Cordelia pointed out, "Nobody could expect you and Faith to risk your child that way. I know you couldn't" she said sharing a look with the Slayer that only a mother could ever fully understand, "I know I couldn't"
It had to be the first time ever that Cordy and Faith had said anything to each other without yelling or making nasty comments, but these were the furthest things from their minds right now.
"I suppose I must be the one to tell Buffy" Giles sighed, "and poor dear Becky also"
"We'll tell Buffy together" Joyce sniffed loudly, trying to contain emotions that threatened to spill over and explode, "I know it'll be hard but she has to be the one to tell Becky if she wants her to know...Rupert, she'll want to help and we couldn't stop her"
"Joyce is right" Xander nodded, "If we tell the Beckster she's gonna want to rush straight home and offer up her blood to Spike"
"He wouldn't drink it" Josh told his father, "Uncle Spike yelled at Becky when she tried to save him at the Magic Box"
"Ssh, sweetie" Cordy told him, hugging him to her. She hated that her little boy had to be caught up in all this, but these were her friends, pretty much her family and when one suffered they all did.
"He might not be able to say no, Josh" Angel told him and the rest of the group, "I remember when the poison was in me..." he sighed and Faith looked guiltily away. He gripped her hand in his and gave her a look that promised he was over that and had been for a long time, the past didn't matter.
"I was half delirious with the pain" he explained, "When Buffy tried to help me I pushed her way, told her I'd rather die but she wouldn't let me. Even the strongest will in the world can't beat the demon that dwells inside a vampire, not when your brain is frying from fever and your last remaining body functions are shutting down one by one" he said sadly.
He fought a lot with Spike and neither of them would ever admit to liking the other, in fact the usual conversation between them was all threats and promises of eternal hatred, but Angel wouldn't wish what Spike was going through on anyone, not even his greatest enemy.
"Let's go Rupert" Joyce said, as she stood up, holding onto his hand, "We have to tell Buffy now"
He nodded in silent agreement as he followed her out of the waiting room leaving so many grim faces behind them. They didn't notice Becky duck around the corner tears steaming down her face. She'd heard every word that had been said. Sensing the gang were hiding something she had pretended to go to the bathroom but instead waited beyond the door, ear pressed to it as she listened to all they had to say.
Her father would die without the blood of a Slayer, and her mother and aunt were firmly out of the picture. Despite his words to her just hours ago, when he told her he'd rather lose his life than see her suffer, Becky was determined on saving her Daddy's life. She could be okay, her Mom had been when she'd saved Angel, there was no reason to think she couldn't survive the same way. It didn't matter if she didn't, she had to save her Dad, he was a more important factor in the world than she was, she decided as she ran from the hospital to Revello Drive.
To Be Continued...
A/N2 : I know all these chapters seem to end of cliffhangers, but it always seems like the best place to stop ;-) Please review and I'll update again soon.