Disclaimer: Alright, so here's the introductory chapter just to start things off from the previous one. I know it's a little boring but I do promise to throw insomething interesting along the way. Remember, this chapter takes place 9 years before the prologue, so its basically one long flashback. I plan on having the entire story line go this way up until it reaches back to where the prologue left off. From there I'll explain Kitty and Logan's current situation and if, or if not they decide to tie the notch and fix there relationship. Oh and one more thing, keep in mind Kitty's 16 here.

Warnings: Nothing too serious in this chapter; maybe some light swearing but that's it.

Chapter One.

Recollection

Kitty's P.O.V.

So the last few days have come and gone without any really major events occurring. The other night, I went into this weird, introspective and pensive sort of mood where I reflected on the lack of stability in my life. I sat around pondering how quickly everything changes and how bonds can be broken so easily, and still others formed and altered in ways you'd have never imagined.

"Lance..." I tremble as I pull away from my thoughts. Already two month after our breakup and I'm still hurting. Why, I don't know. He threw four months away; he threw our four months away. Four months of me wasting my time in thinking we actually might have something together.

It's funny how much time you can spend day after day with someone and in return given a stab in the back. Its funny how after all the effort put into a relationship, one simple yes or no question can still, (and will) ruin everything. It's funny how a male teenagers mind is so easily controlled and corrupted by the desire for sex that he's ready to stake it all on the line for the hopes of one measly lay. It's funny becauseas when I replied with 'no, I don't feel ready yet' he was so intent on forgetting everything we've been though together and end it as quickly as it came.

Sometimes I just kind of wish things would work out differently. But then again, that just takes me back to my original thoughts that you never know exactly who's going to enter your life, or how they'll end up shaping it, or what sort of relationship you're going to carry on. There's no accounting for the strangers who become acquaintances, the acquaintances who become friends, the friends who become best-friends/lovers/soul-mates and so on.

You know, I've always had this deep down fear of being completely alone. Not alone for a few minutes, but a long-term alone for the rest of my life. I fear rolling out of bed each morning, going to school, coming back to the institute, eating dinner, throwing myself in front of the danger room to train and then going back to bed again. The truth is I do have a fear, perhaps an illogical one, of never finding someone who loves me in a non-platonic sense. I know that in many ways that's such a petty concern, especially at the ripe old age of sixteen. But in all honesty I don't know that I ever see anybody falling in love with me. I see myself falling in love with others, but somehow don't think that it will ever be returned with the same magnitude.

God, I bet I sound pathetic, right? On a lighter, more positive side of things; Logan came home the other day. First time in months actually. We went for a ride on his motorcycle to the park. I guess he noticed my mood and thought it best to go for a walk and clear my head.

I really missed having Logan around.

We listened to what each other had to say as we caroused the empty streets. Downtown looked as if it were part of a movie set. Unlived in.

Speaking of movies, we watched an old war-film after coming home; Logan 's choice. I must have fallen asleep halfway into it though, because next thing I know I'm gently tucked away in my bedroom with the sound of a familiar gruff voice mumbling a "g'night half-pint."

I think Logan's one of those people you shiver a little after they exit. The whole situation leaves me weak for a long time afterward, a bit shaken to the core, wondering what could have been said and their interpretation of the evening. Although Logans not one for emotion, he's really been helpful through and through. I'll always appreciate it more than he'll ever know.

Well, I should be getting to bed soon. I have to wake up early tomorrow; midterms are just around the corner. Thankfully Christmas vacation is too.

Things will start looking up again, they have to.

I don't know how present relationships will alter themselves, if present relationships will alter themselves. The conclusion I've drawn however is this: These moods may appear all-consuming, but they can be broken... and that is exactly what I plan to do.

I think I'll be ok. Yeah, I'll be okay. I like the sound of that.

Note: So what do you think. Good? Bad? Should I even continue? R and R.