chibi-kaitou: thanks, I'm glad you like the story :)
Sarah126: thanks :)
yeah, I also like the why he did this ;)
hey, cool noch jemand aus Germany und dann auch noch hier bei Outsiders, grüß dich :)
Tehsylvania: thanks for your review :)
well, I also would be sad if my parents would forget my birthday ;)
3. Boulevard of broken dreams
In the meantime Ponyboy and Two-Bit walked to Johnny's house to surprise him, 'cause they would celebrate a small birthday party at the Curtis'.
When Pony knocked nothing moved. Pony and Two-Bit looked at each other.
"Good ol' Johnnycake wouldn't oversleep his own birthday, would he?" Two-Bit joked.
Pony only shook his head, couldn't help grinning and knocked again.
"Johnny? Johnny, are ya there? Mr. Cade?" he called.
After a while the door was opened and a quite slightly drunk Mr. Cade appeared.
"What ya want?" he asked mad.
"Um, we... we would to Johnny... Is... is he there?" Pony asked, after he had to swallow at the sight of Johnny's drunken and violent old man.
Johnny's old man grumbled, shook his head and said with a venomous voice, "Nope! This ungrateful bastard's away!"
"Away? Did he say where he wanna go to?" Pony asked further, although he knew that Johnny's old man wasn't particularly interested in what his son does or where he stays.
"What are ya askin' me there? Where shall I know that? Why should I know it? I don't care where this bastard's gonna stay! He should dare to come here, then he's gonna go through somethin'!" Mr. Cade flew into a temper.
Pony winced frightened.
"Come on, Pony. Let's go. Guess Johnny really ain't here..." Two-Bit said, while he looked at Mr. Cade with narrowed eyes.
"Ok." Pony admitted defeat and turned around.
Two-Bit said to him, "Let's go to the lot and look there. Probably Johnny wanna be there."
And so both went to the lot but when they found the lot empty, they were surprised.
"Johnny? Johnny, are ya here somewhere?" Pony asked already a bit fearful and looked around searching.
"Hey, Johnnycake! It's only us, good ol' Two-Bit and Ponyboy! Ya can come out from ya hidin' place!" Two-Bit said relaxed.
"Two-Bit... they perhaps wouldn't jump at Johnny... again... would they?" Pony's voice trembled.
Two-Bit didn't reply anything. He just discovered the note on the tree and walked towards it.
"Oh my god, Johnny... No, this can't be! That's not true! They ain't done anythin' to him, not again, not Johnny..." Pony said and suppressed barely his arising panic, while he came to Two-Bit.
This one took the note from the tree and read it.
"Two-Bit?" Ponyboy asked fearful.
"Nope, Pony, the Socs ain't done anythin' to him..." Two-Bit answered and gave Pony the note.
Pony read,
Hey guys!
I'm sorry that it came so far, but I can't take any more! I feel like I'm locked, tricked out of my freedom. And I wanna search for this freedom!
I had it even then on my mind to search my freedom, but I didn't realize this so much at that time as now. But at that time I actually meant suicide with that. But now I didn't any longer.
I don't wanna do somethin' to me, promised, I wanna search real freedom. A place, which is better than here, a place where are no Greasers and also no Socs, but only simply humans...
I'm gonna miss y'all awful and I couldn't bear it without ya, but my desire for this freedom, for a cheerful life, is too big than to suppress it any longer.
I hope it's the right thin' when I disappear!
Please don't be mad with me for that reason!
Anyway, I still love y'all with my whole heart, each one of ya in his way; you are and remain my buddies, my family! I love ya more than anythin' else in my life.
I owe y'all so much...
And still I can't take it any longer. I'm in danger to chokin' here...
I don't know yet where I should go to, just away from here! Away from the whole shit here, away from my folks, away from the damned Socs...
But this shouldn't mean by any means that it was bad with ya!
Nope, on the contrary!
I leave, 'cause I don't wanna be a burden to ya any longer. I know, ya wouldn't admit it, but I feel it's true. I am a burden. For every one. For my folks in any case.
But it was a beautiful time with y'all anyway. I'm gonna miss ya and think of ya every day! But I try to forget ya. Believe me, it's the best for all of us...
I wanna go now!
Bye and please forgive me!
In love, J. C.!
Ps: Don't worry 'bout me. I even wanna make it, I wanna come through somehow!
And please do me a favour: don't search for me; this just even makes it worse!
I really suggest that!
And take care of y'all! I love ya!
Take care of ya and sorry, Pony!
When Pony finished he looked up with tears in the eyes and whispered, "Oh my god, Johnny..."
Then he whirled around and shouted, "We've to find him before the Socs get him. He's all alone..."
And already he would run away when he was held tight by Two-Bit.
"Hey, Pony. Don't be that hasty. We don't know at all where he could be." Two-Bit tried to calm Pony down.
"That's just one more reason to search for him..."
"Let's go to ya home at first and then we'll see..." Two-Bit suggested.
And so they set off to the Curtis'.
Meanwhile Johnny had a destination: he would go to Oklahoma City.
He hoped to find there his freedom and a better life. He often dreamt of it to come there some day.
And so he searched for a bus that will drive there. He really found one and got on.
With a slight touch of sadness he looked out of the window, where his hometown passed by. This place he never ever left up to now.
And now he would leave it for the first time in his life and move out into the wide world - even though this meant for the present only Oklahoma City.
And he would never ever come back again here.
And at these thoughts his friends came to his mind again and it made him sad. But this couldn't keep him from his plan.
He wouldn't listen to anything and anybody or put up with something any longer.
He would become tough now, so that nobody could do him any harm any more.
And that's why he had to leave his friends; even if it will mean very much difficult to him.