Memories
Chapter 6: Pranks and Utter Chaos
DISCLAIMER: I do not own J.K. Rowling's work.
A/N: This chapter has been revised. Please review!
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General PoV
"Ladies and gentlemen. We are gathered here today to commemorate our joyous reunion that has finally ended the tortuous holiday break. Through the harsh separation our hearts have grown fonder," here Sirius dramatically placed his hand over his heart, "and – hey! Is anyone actually listening to me?"
A snore, three vacant looks, and two bored ones answered him.
"Nope," Remus acted as spokesperson. "So why don't you skip ahead, instead of letting us die of boredom listening to your dramatics?"
"Oh, who's the one being dramatic now?" Sirius retorted.
"Still you, mate," James yawned. He turned to his right side and shook Peter awake, saying, "Come on, Pete, Sirius has finally agreed to get to the point."
"Fine," huffed Sirius. "As I was saying, hopefully we've all been thinking up clever ideas over the hols, good suggestions for pranks that we can pull. So… anyone have any ideas?"
"Yeah, I have one. How 'bout we let James make the speech next time?" Remus suggested innocently.
"Shut it, Moony," Sirius scowled in his direction. All he got for his pains was a cheeky grin in response.
"Hey, guys! I just got a brilliant idea!" James shouted. Leaning in towards the rest, he said, "Here's what we're going to do…"
scene change
General PoV
During Potions class the next morning, one of the two dark-haired boys sitting in the back corner of the room lifted his head and looked at the other back corner occupied by two fair-haired boys. Remus, coincidentally sitting right behind Severus Snape's cauldron, lifted his head and gave the Marauder signal to James, with a mischievous grin in addition.
James in turn whispered to Sirius that Snape's potion was ready. Quick as a flash, Sirius stood up while Professor Snyder's back was turned for an instant and lobbed a bound concoction into Severus Snape's cauldron. The resulting explosion shook the very walls of the dungeon room.
Whirling around at the sound, Professor Snyder saw a shell-shocked Severus Snape, but a rather different version than he was used to. His whole head had shrunken to the size of a goblin's, with bits of wrinkly skin hanging off his cheekbones. His head was completely devoid of hair, and had an additional yellowish tinge to the top of it. The rest of Snape was completely normal…except for the smell.
A peculiar odor made up of rotten newts, the kind of public toilet that no one cleans, mixed in with a couple of dead slugs hung around the air, persistently clinging to Snape. Needless to say, the nearby students shifted their desks and cauldrons, giving Snape a wide berth about six feet in diameter.
The wrinkly thing that greatly resembled Sirius' house-elf shrunk in the seat, the neck and face awash in a flush so radiant it would have put roses to shame.
The class settled down under Professor Snyder's instructions, although titters broke out every once in a while. The professor continued to glare suspiciously at four particular Gryffindor boys for the rest of the hour.
scene change
General PoV
"Guess what?" Sirius shouted excitedly as he burst into the dormitory. He stared around at the languid boys that were lounging around in varying states of boredom.
"What's wrong with you lot?" he queried.
His answer was three heads turning simultaneously and staring vacantly at him.
"Okay," Sirius said slowly. Then, remembering what he was so excited about, he said, "Well, anyway, guess what?"
He looked expectantly at the other three boys, but if he had wanted a big reaction he was sadly disappointed. All he got was three blank looks.
"I went into Hogsmeade today and bought this stuff," Sirius said, holding up a can.
Finally, after about five minutes of silence, James moved his head one inch to the side to read the label. This was the first time anyone had moved within the hour, and it seemed to jolt the other two back into existence; Remus shifted his arm up an inch and Peter wiggled two of his toes.
"Super Sticky Slime?" asked James, still tilting his head.
"Oh, yeah," Sirius grinned. "The amount in the can is enough to coat about one floor of the castle with bright green goo. No one'll be able to get it off except us, so even if we get detention, we'll be able to use magic to clean it up."
"Brilliant!" Remus said, propping his head up onto his arms.
"What should we use it for?" Peter asked, rubbing the foot that apparently fell asleep.
"How about the fourth floor corridor?" Remus suggested. "If we spread it in the morning before classes we won't have to go to Potions, we won't have to see Snyder until he gets it off since he won't be able to get out of his rooms, and we'll be free to explore that one passage on the map."
"Great idea!" enthused Sirius. "Let's do it tomorrow morning!"
"I'll go tell the girls about it," James volunteered, getting up from his bed.
"Prongs just wants to go to see Lily," teased Sirius. James turned a bright red, even as he fiercely denied it.
"Prongsie likes Lily, Prongsie likes Lily," said Sirius in a sing-song voice. "Prongsie likes Li – mph!" The pillow thrown at his head muffled his taunts. Pretty soon an all-out pillow fight had begun.
"What's going on?" Brooke poked her head in the door and looked around at the boys.
"A pillow fight!" shouted Lyssa, who came in behind her. Lily trailed in last. "Let us join in, too!"
"All right," Sirius shrugged. "Here, let's split up into teams…"
An hour later, Professor McGonagall went upstairs to see what all the muffled noise and shrieking was being caused by. As she opened the door, all action immediately ceased and her mouth dropped open at the sight before her eyes.
Feathers were everywhere, floating gently down from the clouds they had been released in. James and Lily were crouched inside a plastic dome Transfigured from a bedpost and charmed to repel any object that touched it. Sirius held two huge, fluffy marshmallows that he had conjured, one each above Peter and Lyssa. Remus was cowering on the floor, while Brooke froze with a pillow the size of a large boulder above his head.
"Never, in my entire life – I – Mr. Potter, Mr. Black, explain yourselves!" spluttered Professor McGonagall. James had never seen his professor so flustered.
"Well, what it is – " James started to speak, but was cut off by Lily's quiet voice.
"Professor, it wasn't just James and Sirius; we're all at fault, and we apologize. Punish all of us equally," she said. James could hear in her voice a quiet determination for justice, and couldn't help admiring her for it.
A week later found them all organizing Filch's cabinets. Luckily, McGonagall softened up a bit because of Lily's confession, and so they were all in the same detention. The three hours were spent laboriously re-writing all the faded descriptions of punishments and shoving them back into their correct spots. The Marauders had an entire side of the wall devoted to their punishments, and they all enjoyed themselves immensely, reminiscing over past pranks that they had forgotten about.
"Oy, look here! Remember when we levitated Snape at breakfast wearing a ballerina's costume? I don't ever remember Dumbledore trying so hard not to laugh. Good times," Sirius said with a sigh and a dramatic sniff.
"Hey, this is the time when we put antlers on that seventh year. Nott, I think it was," James laughed, remembering the incident from fifth year.
The Marauders were inspired from reading about all their past deeds and pulled the record number of pranks in the next month. They coated the fourth floor with the Slime, as planned. The next prank was enchanting the fur of Apollyon Pringle's cat the change colors every time she moved, making her increasingly unwilling to move. They caused Malfoy and his cronies to speak in embarrassingly high and squeaky voices for an entire week, heartily getting their fill of laughter all the while. Severus Snape got the honor of being chosen to dance most inappropriately during dinner one evening, belting out the tune to a Celestina Warbeck song while wearing tight leather trousers. The suits of armor had their fun chasing down Professor McGonagall every time they saw her, loudly singing Christmas carols with rude lyrics. All these pranks were pulled through all of January, into the middle of February.
Of course, at this time, all the girls in the school seemed revived and started their usual giggling and ogling at the prospective boys in the school. Why?
Valentine's Day.
A/N: Please review! They are most appreciated! Thank you!
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