AN: Heya, sorry for the delay but I don't have this song on my computer like the others. I've also been busy with other stuff...so yeah. Hooray for another chapter:D

Spoiler: I think we've taken care of this already. If not...then um...oh well.

Disclaimer: I can't sing that well, and I wish I could write cool songs and play instruments and whatnot (I actually want to start a band but I can't do anything...). But I can't, so the rights of the awesome song Vindicated belong to Dashboard Confessionals.

Mac POV

Friday
0530 Local
Mac's Apartment
Georgetown, DC (I do NOT remember where Mac's apartment is, okay?)

I can feel my dream fading and reality kicking in. No, five more minutes...please. For a fleeting moment, I have a warm fuzzy feeling, and my lips are curled into a smile. I'm not entirely sure why, but I don't care; it feels like I've just gotten some sentimental present from Harm or something. About thirty seconds (well actually, 28 seconds to be exact) later the damned CD/radio/alarm clock thing (that I haven't entirely figured out how to work yet shocking, I know) turns on and I hear the intro to a song that's vaguely familiar. Sounds nice for about ten seconds, then WHAM! Guitars and drums start up over the sound effecty intro.

"Rrr..I'm awake DAMMIT!" My hand has grabbed the circular (and pretty small) battery operated object. I'm about two seconds away from hurling it against my bedroom wall when I hear the first lines being sung by a low voice, and I set it down, opting not to completely obliterate the device and listen to the song before crawling out of bed.

/What's the harm.../ As soon as that word entered my head as even a thought I was lost in my own little fantasy land. I could even imagine that sexy voice coming at me through the speakers was him it was so painfully accurate. The face that was associated with his name came to me the instant I closed my eyes. The dark hair that I wanted to lose a hand in, the unfathomable blue eyes that pierced me every time we looked at each other and a bright Flyboy smile that could melt even the coldest of hearts. I let the music wash over me as I drifted in and out of a doze; hazy daydreams of strong arms enveloping me in a spicy-scented hug slipped in and out of my grasp.

Hope dangles on a string
Like slow spinning redemption
Winding in and winding out
The shine of which has caught my eye

And roped me in
So mesmerizing, so hypnotizing
I am captivated

/Hope for us. I think it's still there...our smiles come easier, and we haven't fought in the knock-down, drag-out way like we used to anymore. We both have our redeeming to do; done things to wound the other so deeply it's not eveneasy to think about. Our chance goes away and comes back, swinging like a pendulum in a never ending cycle. I'm so sorry Harm.../ My eyes close tighter in an attempt to keep tears from leaking, but one lone drop squeezes out and and trails down my cheek. I wipe it away hastily, sniffing and glad for the solitude of my apartment this early morning.

I am vindicated
I am selfish, I am wrong
I am right I swear I'm right
I swear I knew it all along

And I am flawed
But I am cleaning up so well
I am seeing in my now the things you swore you saw yourself

/We're both right and wrong at the same time. We're never on the same page; but he always could see the best in me, even at the worst times when I fell off the wagon. He was right there to pick my sorry six up and put me back on my feet, no questions asked. Both of us too stubborn and too pig-headed to see what's right in front of our eyes./

So clear
Like the diamond in your ring
Cut to mirror your intentions
Oversized and overwhelmed

The shine of it has caught my eye
And rendered me so isolated, so motivated
I am certain now that

I raised my left hand, the slightly olive skin contrasting against the blank ceiling over my head. I looked at the manicured nails, then to the bare ring finger. I touched it with my other hand, pulling the arm back down to my chest. I could feel Mic's ring still there; the slight weight that meant so much in this world. /I pushed you away the second that ring moved to this finger. You said 'Not yet', but I couldn't wait. I don't know why I couldn't - I loved you; still love you so much./ I'm sorry for breaking that sweet talking Australian's heart, but I'm glad we didn't get married. It gives me the hope that maybe Harm and I can get our acts together long enough to fall apart in each other's arms.

I am vindicated
I am selfish, I am wrong
I am right I swear I'm right
Swear I knew it all along

And I am flawed
But I am cleaning up so well
I am seeing in my now the things you swore you saw yourself

I reached over to the nightstand by my bed, feeling past the music-emitting radio for the engraved band nearby. The small loop slid over my skin, and I glanced at the cool Marine piece fitted perfectly to my right hand's digit. (That is what she wears, right? If not, you know the one I'm talking about. :P) /This is the only ring around my finger for now. I am selfish, I am wrong, and I am flawed. It seems like only he can see past all that sometimes; then others no one gets past my walls./ When I stared long enough at the wall opposite me, my vision of the mirror and dresser there blurred, but the image of Harm's smiling face only sharpened in my mind's eye; this song was flowing past his lips, and he was singing it to me.

So turn
Up the corners of your lips
Part them and feel my fingertips
Taste the moment, fall forever
Defense is paper thin
Just one touch and I'd be in
Too deep now to ever swim against the current

So let me slip away 3x
So let me slip against the current
So let me slip away 4x

My steady breathing changed, and I felt a little possessed when my lips curled into a smile, parting and almost feeling the whisper soft touch of Harm's lips on mine. How long had it been since we last shared a lip-lock? /Too long/ I thought to myself, thinking of our previous situations where I'd felt so vulnerable. I could hide behind the Marine facade with everyone else, but Harm isn't so easily fooled. He'd break through at the worst times, or even at the best; and I would get lost in his blue eyes. When the words reached the point of the singer getting lost in that swift tide, my imagination lost the will to hold my mental picture of the man I was madly in love with. He was slipping away from me.

I am vindicated
I am selfish, I am wrong
I am right I swear I'm right
Swear I knew it all along

And I am flawed
But I am cleaning up so well
I am seeing in me now the things you swore you saw yourself

My pillow found itself in a choking hug; my attempt at keeping Harm with me. I closed my eyes and brought back his image once more, seeing that smiling face in front of me again. I yawned, hearing the loud guitars and drums that had woken me up fade into the background and that deep voice come back tome one last time.

Slight hope
Dangles on a string
Like slow spinning redemption...

I get out of bed, leaving the covers tangled for now. I stand over the clock, my hand turning the knob of alarm to 'OFF'. I noticed that the clock was off by a few minutes; according to my internal settings, anyway. I start my morning routine; coffee, shower, breakfast. I'm on auto pilot though, my body going through the motions while my mind was detached and off in its own little world of wondering what that song could mean. Waking up from the reverie I found that my fingers were smoothing out a small crease in my uniform. The green material felt a little rough, but then again it always did. I looked in the mirror for a hair-check; all pins were in place. But in the reflection I caught sight of the picture of us on my nightstand. He was smiling, as always, as was I. We were happy that day. Something clicked in my mind when the words of the emo band echoed through my thoughts.

Vindicated means just be justified (sorta - gimme some leeway). I love that sailor-turned-lawyer-who-wouldn't-give-up-flying-for-the-Navy-Squid Harmon Rabb, Jr. If I'm going to be vindicated, I need to tell him how I feel. Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow - but soon. /Our slight hope is dangling right in front of me, Harm. And I'm not going to let it get away anymore./ With a new resolve, I swept out the door.

Harm woke up about thirty seconds later, forgetting that he was going to be late for a second when a wave of something he couldn't quite name washed over him. Maybe it would be a good day for the both of them.

AN: Whew! Hope the chapter turned out okay, and forgive me if the lyrics aren't perfect. As I've said before, I don't even own this song on CD, so hey. Sorry for the wait, but now that you've enjoyed, how 'bout leaving me a little something in the form of a review? It'll get me going on the next chapter even faster:D