Broken Twice

Disclaimer- Not mine, or anyone else I mention.

A/N- This chapter will start off with a flashback, sort of inside Marissa's head. But no, the baby that was aborted was not Ryan's, it was the guy that it "didn't work out" with in the first chapter, if you recall. Flashback is just to show that Marissa is ok with moving on. I hope you all enjoy!

Brsoccerchic89-Aww, thank you soooo much! I appreciate it! I always look forward to your reviews :D

Bobbo- Yeah, switched it to PG-13 since the drama-ish level was toned down.

EVERYONE ELSE-Ahh, how amazing are you guys? As much as I am an ass for not updating. I'll try to over the upcoming break as much as I can, but not promising anything.

Her hands immediately flew over the edges of the silver frame and she put it face down on the oak night table. "We don't...don't have to," the man whispered, stopping with her zipper. "I know, I want..." she gulped, running her hands over his closed, brown eyes"I want to, ok?" she smiled weakly at him, trying to prove her hardest that she was fine with it. "We-"

She calmed him down with a smooth finger over his soft red lips. "I know, I'm perfectly fine." He smiled and leaned down to kiss her lips softly as he tried to get the silk material off of her body. "You'll never be fine Riss, but I guess you're just more appealing that way," he grinned. Happy to recieve a grin return, he continued to let his fingers work the magic on getting her dress off.

Ryan walked into the apartment, dragging some of Maddy's belongings behind him as he called Marissa's name out.

"In here," she responded. Ryan eyed the three rooms; their bedroom, Maddy's bedroom, or bathroom. "Bathroom," she added after a beat when he wasn't responding. He smiled and set down the pink Hello Kitty suitcases in the living room, making his way to the bathroom. He knocked on the door to signal he was coming in. "You decent?"

"No," she smiled inside the tub "come in." Ryan walked right in, to be met with a sight of Marissa taking a bath, bubbles covering every inch up to her jaw. "Having fun?" he joked, closing the door as he walked further into the white tiled bathroom. "Tons," she teased, signaling him to come closer with a wagging finger. Ryan kneeled down beside the porcelin tub, raising his eyebrows in the meantime. "How was your day?" she asked, lifting herself up slightly with her heels. "Uneventful." She smiled and playfully rolled her eyes. "Yours?"

"Same," she agreed, finally lifting her hands from her sides and wrapping them around the back of his head and kissing him quickly. "You wanna join?" She motioned to the tub with her eyes. Ryan looked down at what he was wearing; jeans, t-shirt and socks. "No thanks, I'm good. Besides, not really a bath person."

"Figured," she admitted, settling back in the tub as Ryan sat on the edge. "I can..." he stuttered "...help...if you need it or anything." Marissa smirked, holding up a bar of soap. "I'm perfectly fine washing myself." "I know, I know," he continued to jump around with words "...just if you...want or anything...I mean, baby...and all..."

"Being pregnant limits your activites, doesn't disable you completly," she smiled, watching his facial expressions change.

Ryan saw her hands move around inside the tub; to her stomach and smiled, sticking his hand inside the warm water and connecting directly with her stomach. She sighed with relief inside, finally happy to see him touch her again. Ever since the abortion reveal, affection was limited to...

None.

Quite frankly, Marissa was starting to get worried. She was starting to feel rejected. And that's the last thing a pregnant woman wants to feel. As she continued to dream on, she noticed Ryan's hand going farther and farther up her stomach, finally stopping on the side of her left breast as he lathered water on it. Marissa looked up at him, he didn't seem to be thinking, just concentrating on the white hand towel that stood a few feet from his face. A cough from Marissa brought him out of his daydream. His hand quickly snapped out of the water once he realized what he was doing.

He resonded to Marissa's sour faced by muttering "I'm sorry, mistake."

Marissa immediately drew her knees up to her chest and stood slightly, the foamy bubbles still covering her. "It's not a mistake..." she whispered "it's anything but a mistake. Do you know how long I've been waiting for you to..." Her hands wrapped around his neck, her bare body against his clothed one. "I'm sorry I haven't-" he apolgized, looking away. "No you're not...you're disguisted with me...and what I did to that baby..."

Ryan turned to face her. "That's not..."

"Not true? At least have the decency not to lie to me. Because I sure as hell know it's true. Because if you weren't so outraged with the thought, and you did love me, when were 17, you would've told Theresa to have one, right?"

He didn't answer.

"And the only reason I had it was because...I wasn't ready, and I wasn't willing to give up the baby that I had become so accustomed to for nine months to someone else so they could completely forget who I was."

"Are you done?" he interupted.

"No" she snapped "not done. You're disguisted with the fact that I had sex with another man, unprotected sex for that matter. But you know what, you don't have to worry, when he found out what I did, he was disguisted just like you and he dumped me. We were dating for about...six months I guess and when he found out, he couldn't live with it, so he left. Kinda like you."

Ryan glared at her. She was safely back in the tub now. "And when he left, I got caught up in work, and I got promoted and Newport just had to be my location...so here I am. About to have your baby."

Ryan continued to stare disbelievingly. "Now I'm done," she paused, crossing her arms across her chest.

"Good," he leaned his body forawrd to pick her up by the shoulders and have her rest her foam covered body against his. "You don't know how hard it was" she whispered. "I know" he whispered back, stroking her wet hair. "Or at least trying to understand..."

"You weren't even there...maybe talk me out of it or..."

He pulled back, his hands holding her cheeks. "Do you regret it..." he started to ask slowly. "I killed a baby Ryan, do you think I regret it" She stumbled into his lap in a strange position, her thighs next to his knees. "I want you to help me feel better, please..."

"Anything," he choked out, now cradling her in his arms. Her hands reached to the hem of his gray t-shirt, starting to take it off. "Join me than..." Her voice was down to a hoarse whisper as she slid back gracefully in the tub. He started to protest by waving a hand but Marissa drew him in by his collar. "For me, please." Without letting him respond, she put his lips against his tightly making him squirm as he got closer and closer to getting inside the foamy water. "I don't want to hurt you," he let out, now kissing her neck, his palms making their way around her upper torso. "Than do this with me", she smiled, finding his lips again and succeding in having his t-shirt up to his neck.

A loud groan escaped both of them as the doorbell was heard. "Don't get it," she pleaded. She saw the disappointed look on his face. "I have to, if it's Maddy..."

Marissa rolled herself back in the tub. "I-I'll be back, I promise, just..." He positioned himself upright and started out the bathroom door. "Wait...please."

"Damn it!" he whispered as he went to get the door "who the hell is it." He opened it and called out a 'coming' as he opened the door to reveal Sandy and Kirsten, and a pair of brunettes behind them. Kirsten smiled and motioned for him to come over and give her a hug. He did so, also giving Sandy a hug as he led them in, Seth following and Summer trailing behind the rest of the group. "Nice place," Sandy commented as he eyed the furniture, poking his head quickly in the kitchen. "Yeah, um-thanks, but kind of a surprise to have guests, didn't have the chance to clean up," he motioned to the towel that was lying on the sofa and a pair of Marissa's shoes in the middle of the floor. Sandy raised his eyebrows suspiciously, taking Seth by the shoulders, whispering "where's Marissa?"

"Uh, she's not feeling well, so she's freshning up quickly." Ryan cut in.

"What's wrong?" Kirsten cut in, a look of worry on her aging face. "Just-you know, women troubles," he explained uncomfortably, looking towards the bathroom.

None of the people before him knew about the baby. "I'll go get her, just sit down I guess."

"Go." Kirsten commaded softly.

Ryan nodded and quickly hurried to the bathroom. "Guessing by the manly voices, that wasn't Maddy?" she asked coldly, already out of the tub and in her pink bathrobe. "No, Sandy, Kirsten, Seth and Summer-if I would've known..."

"It's fine," she lied, wrapping the robe around her tighter. "I'm so sorry for everything," he came over to her, taking her hand. "We'll talk later, I promise, tonight, whatever you want."

"I know, I know." Marissa rolled her eyes, shrugging him off and going out of the bathroom to go get changed entertain their guests.

-

She shifted the pale green flowered comforter to the foot of the bed when she was suddenly pushed forward and hovered over.

Ryan.

"Ryan, I don't wanna talk to you right now, so lets just sleep."

"I'm not getting off of you until we talk. We can't ignore it." Marissa budged slightly, trying to get Ryan's hands off the bed which were trapped around her. "If I remember correctly, we weren't doing much..." she smirked slightly, looking towards the closed door, "much talking." "Than lets keep going with that pattern," he grinned, bending down and kissing her. Immediately, her body released and his arms started to go weak. "I missed-"

"Me too."

Ryan was careful as he took off her shirt, exposing her still semi-flat belly and set her down back on the bed. He gulped, finally glad to have her back. And for the first time in a while, they were intamite.

-

His jacket slipped off and slid into her hands. "So anything I can do to get you more comfortable?" the brunette grinned. "No, let's just get this done," he growled, closing the bedroom door.

-

"I haven't thought about it," Ryan stroked his chin as he turned his face to the right, making eye contact with Marissa. She laughed and looked back at the TV. "Well this is why we should watch it, to get ideas." "Bob Villa is not my idea of home remodeling," Ryan confessed "more of Ryan Atwood remodeling." Marissa laughed again, puting her hands over her 2 month belly. "I guess we've got time to think about colors," she admitted, turning the TV off. "Yes we do," Ryan agreed "but Ireally can't wait for 7 months, see you at your worst."

He was shoved by Marissa and captured her hands in his own, feeling the feminine softness. He looked at her ring finger. Someday he'd put a ring on it, but for now, they were perfectly happy the way they were. "So at brunch will we tell them?" Marissa questioned anxiously, gripping Ryan's fingers around her tighter. "If you want to, sure."

"Of course I want to," Marissa gave him a look of confusion. "You...? Don't want to."

"Of course I-its not that, its just I guess after seeing their reaction with the two of us being together, and than hearing we want to have a baby."

"Are having." Marissa corrected. "That we're having-who knows what they'll think."

"And here I thought your parents were supposed to be the easy ones to persuade" she sighed, resting her head on his chest. Ryan laughed, turning the TV back on and commenting on the home improvement channel. "What about when the baby comes-are we using Maddy's room or are..."

"Don't worry about that," Ryan comforted, kissing her temple "I"ll take care of it, you just sit here and have hormones." Marissa laughed and continued watching, daydreaming about the new baby's room.

-

Hard pounding was heard coming from outside and Ryan just assumed it was the rain that was taking its usual season course. But this one came with wails and sobs. He looked for Marissa and found her in his arms, sleepfully peacefully. He strained his eyes to look at the clock and saw that it was 2:30 in the morning. Who could be up at this hour?

He quietly let Marissa out of his arms, slid a pair of sweats on and jogged to the continuing sobbing. A look of worry washed his face as he opened the door to reveal a soasked Maddy crying hysterically and Theresa with her head in her hands on the stairs. "What..." he picked up the wailing Maddy in his arms, cradling her to stop crying. "What's going on?" he asked quietly to Theresa who had gotten up from the stairs. "She just-just started screaming and she wanted to come over here the moment she heard so I just drove."

"All the way from LA? Must be pretty important."

"I don't wanna move! Tell Momma that I don't want to! Tell her Daddy!" Maddy screamed.

"Moving," Ryan looked up from Maddy, who was still in his arms, to Theresa, who was sitting on the brown leather chair. "Moving where?" "Atanta!" Maddy screamed. "Ryan what's wrong, I heard screaming and thought something happened to-" Marissa came out, tying her robe and rubbing sleep from her eyes. "Maddy! Theresa" She looked at Ryan. "Ryan! What's going on?"

Ryan looked to Theresa. "Ask her."

"I'm..." she stopped and pointed to Maddy "we're moving...to Atlanta."

"What!" Ryan and Marissa yelled out simulatenously.

"And I don't wanna!" Maddy cried.

-

"So you're ok with this" Ryan asked, drawing Marissa closer to his side of the bed. "Of course, your ex-wife is sleeping in the next room with a child that isn't biologically yours while we sleep in the next room, I'm perfectly fine with it, and it's completly normal."

"Thanks, I knew you'd understand," he said sarcastically. "Of course," Marissa joked, snuggling under the warmth of the covers and the manly arms that surrounded her. "I just can't believe this is..."

"Shh," she quieted him down, "we'll talk about this in the morning, not now, like Theresa said." Ryan sat back down and sighed. "Well its 4 in the morning, I'm a little hungry, you want anything." Marissa nodded "I do have a certain craving."

"Ok, what is it?"

"Not that kind," she teased, sitting up as well and kissing him. "This kind. The kind that won't get any further than it is right now, and the kind that should remind you that your ex-wife and daughter are in the next room." "Well now I know what morning sickness feels like" he joked, pushing her on one of the pillows. "It's a wonderful feeling," she giggled.

"Keep it down! Me and Mommy are trying to sleep!"

Marissa's eyes bulged as did Ryan's and they laid down quietly. "I wasn't aware I was paying for paper-thin walls." Marissa shh-ed him again and flipped herself on the other side of the bed, Ryan lying in the middle. He sighed "what a night."

Marissa had one last stab at it. "It was a completly normal night."

A/N- Moved too fast and left thing unresolved, but its the way its supposed to be in order for it to be the way I want to. If it didn't make sense, it's like 1 in the morning and I'm living off of 4 hours of sleep so I hope its not too bad. I"ll try to keep updating all my other stories as well.