Title: Secrets and Lives
Author: stargazer
Pairing/Character: Lilly, Lilly/Aaron
Word Count: 575
Rating: PG-13 (language and innuendo)
Summary: Lilly's final thoughts on dying, blackmail, and her murderer.
Spoilers: None. If you've ever seen the show, you're good to go. This is just one spoiler-free story that deals with a possible Who and Why.
Thanks: kieyra for the beta and encouragement!
"I've got a secret. It's a good one."
Veronica Mars, I'm going to be in Aaron Echolls next film. He just doesn't know it yet, but he'll find out tonight. Logan's out of town, Lynn's on yet another bender… tonight's my big break.
I've got something on him, Veronica Mars. Something he'll do anything to hide. He's going to make me a star. I mean, it's not like they don't all start out as prostitutes anyway. Blackmail's just a step up.
If I'd had time to tell you all that, you would have warned me, Veronica Mars. You would have expressed concern and I would have laughed. Oh, Veronica Mars, live a little. It's just sex. It's just a few photos that don't even exist. It's just a little tiny blackmail scheme, that doesn't even involve money. Besides, Veronica Mars, you know that I'd do a lot of things to Logan, but I'd never publicly embarrass him like that.
I just forgot that Aaron doesn't know that about me. I just forgot about the bruises Logan won't mention. I just forgot that Aaron's a man who gets what he wants and takes what he wants and doesn't really give a damn for the rest of us. Veronica Mars, you don't know any of that either, but you still would have tried to stop me. Some days I envy your discretion. No. Really. I do.
I've overplayed my hand before, Veronica Mars. I've lost the shirt off my back a few times, but that was mostly strategic. I mean, it's not strip poker if no one gets naked, right? Logan always said I was just no good at cards, and I always said that I won either way. I've just never realized I had anything to lose.
If I'd had time to tell you that, maybe things would have turned out different. But no, I had a schedule to keep and yet another lover to jilt. It figures that the one day I'm home early, everyone else has other plans. They were supposed to be here to catch us. I have to confess that the very thought of Celeste walking in on me and Aaron in flagrante delicto still warms the cockles of my cool and dying heart. Would have been a blast, Mars. I screwed up though, he arrived and I got nervous. I blew my figurative load. I knew I should have mounted him first, that's always helped me get my way in the past. I just wasn't expecting that burst of temper, but how the hell did I not know it was there? I guess I didn't want to know it was there.
What the hell - it's just a massive, sucking head wound, Mars. Nothing a little Neosporin and an extra-large bandage won't fix. You know, if I were you I'd probably be spending these last moments writing Aaron's name on the cement in my blood instead of worrying about coulda, shoulda, woulda. You're so damn resourceful sometimes, and I don't even think you know it. I always dug that about you, Veronica Mars. I know I tried to make you more like me sometimes, but it wouldn't have killed me to have tried to be a little more like you. Of course, I never thought that being like me was going to kill me either…
Yeah, I had a secret, and a good one. But it really wasn't worth all this shit.