A/N Thanks to one of my anonymous reviewers for pointing out my spelling and grammar mistakes. And to answer their question—what's a Beta reader? Just kidding! But one of my sisters reads my stuff for me—believe it or not what you read is way better than what she reads—she always laughs at my spelling. Tygerlilee goes off to pout And she's my little sister too…but not that little. Sniffle, sniffle My baby's all grown up! She's legally an adult now! Well, she's not a whole heck of a lot younger than me either. ANYWAY (wow, I chased that rabbit to death), I'll try to do better on that and thanks again for telling me!
Yah, and LF, I'm not surprised that my writing is changing. I have to admit I'm pretty tired. I'm probably doing too much so my brain's fried. But I'll try to do the best I can—sorry if it's not up to your standard.
But I hope you guys enjoy this chapter—warning—it's a little angsty. Okay, it's a lot angsty. But it'll get happier! But this fic is getting pretty serious so I changed the genra for it.
And you guys are going to love the next chapter after this one….
Chapter Nineteen
Shots of Night, Slivers of Fate
Relena stepped out of the shower and pulled her blue towel around her tightly. She still had a couple hours till the dinner and then the conference. After that, there would be a press conference, the never-ending gyre of politics.
She wiped away the slowly clumping mist on the mirror away and looked at herself briefly—round little face, big blue eyes, long, and currently very wet hair twisting itself into bundles around her head like a bad dread-lock job. She sighed at her reflection and picked up her toothbrush off of the tiny hotel-room cupboard. The other day she'd been on the subway and someone came up to her and asked her if she was lost, if she needed help finding her parents. Yes, her face was round but for heavens sake! Surely she looked old enough to be on a subway by herself!
Actually, she'd asked her mother about that, and she told her it all depended on how she dressed. Casual jeans or overalls and a t-shirt with double braids did make her look very young, she'd told her tenderly. Relena had laughed at that—her mother was always trying to be so delicate about everything, so careful and polite.
She opened the door and a wave of cool air hit her in the face, clearing out her air passages. It felt wonderful, for about two minutes and then she was shivering. But after ten minutes with the hairdryer, she was boiling again.
Zechs had warned her that things were…delicate politically here right now. She'd have to be very cautious and subtle in dealing with the people here. As she carefully lined her eyes, she heard one of the guards at her door cough lightly. It was a bit unnerving to have them around her at all times, but after being kidnapped all those years ago, she was willing to suffer with them. And she was growing accustomed to them. Surprising what one grows to accept and find normal.
Her skirt suit lay carefully pressed on the bed, forest green knee length skirt and long sleeved jacket with a white shirt—not her favorite, but she liked it. Her favorite gray and pink one had been dirty when she was about to leave and she didn't have time to have it cleaned.
Quickly she shimmied into it and twisted her hair into a tight knot at the base of her neck, a few forever bangs falling out. She turned to look in the mirror. Hah, she told the face looking back, not so young looking now…but she did look a bit like a school marm with her hair so tight. But she didn't really care; it would loosen throughout the night.
On the stairs to the ballroom, she had a chance to watch everyone without being noticed. The governor was a happy, soft looking man. He would be having problems with law enforcement with a nature such as that. And his assistants looked a little too self-assured, one was off in the corner flirting with some girl. She suppressed the urge to roll her eyes.
"Having fun?" Relena jumped but calmed quickly as a familiar voice chuckled and placed a firm hand on her shoulder. She turned to hug her brother.
"How are you?"
"Well. How about you? Discover anything interesting from your perch?"
Relena smiled and stepped back. "Not really. Care to escort me down?"
Zechs took her arm and they walked into the lions' den…
And three hours later, Relena wished he could just escort her out again. It was almost time for the press conference and all she succeeded in doing was arguing with every single person in the room, and she so prided herself on her patience! It was infuriating.
They wouldn't listen to a word she said; they just blindly assumed that all was right in the area and there was nothing to worry about. Then why did you morons request a visit with me? She kept asking herself. Either they were stupid or just odd.
"I just don't see any problems with the factories. They are honest people working for honest pay," one man was saying.
"Hold on a second! Factories? Who mentioned factories?" Relena asked sharply. There was a palatable silence and then Relena felt her mouth drop in shock as something slammed into her, knocking her to the ground, then she heard a loud noise—loud was all she could describe it as.
Then things started happening very fast. Someone screamed and Relena laid there listening to pandemonium completely nonplussed as to what happened.
Someone was calling her, but she was having trouble focusing, everything was getting hazy. "Relena!" That same voice yelled, pulling her face towards the source. It was him, with long blond hair…Milliardo….why did he seem so far away. Human arms couldn't be that long.
"Relena! Can you hear me?"
She nodded slowly. He waved his fingers in front of her eyes and she followed them slowly. She could neither think nor move. Everything felt very still but very fast at the same time, like a strobe light on a disco ball.
He picked her up like a small child, cradling her to his chest, and fled from the room. She was pretty sure he was running because the exit signs that lined the ceiling seemed a blur; she only recognized the color—or was it her own eyes playing games...
A van pulled out in front of them and the door opened, several uniformed men yelled at Milliardo and he climbed in, still holding her. Once seated, he pulled her coat off and unbuttoned her shirt. She wanted to ask him what in the world he thought he was doing but all that came out as an indistinct murmur. She felt something wet come up with the words and put her hands up to her mouth. At the same time she looked at her darkened, sticky fingers, she saw Milliardo's face, pale and sweating profusely. Then her head became unbelievably heavy and Milliardo's face darkened to nothing.
"How's she doing back there?" the driver yelled back at Zechs. But he was still staring at his sister, bleeding and unconscious. One of the other soldiers yelled, "She needs a doctor fast!"
The driver picked up the speed a little more; he was already pushing a hundred. Then Zechs's own skills kicked in. He unfroze his mind and she was just another fallen man on the battle field. He looked carefully at her wounds—two gun shots, one to the right chest and the other in the thigh, both could be critical, especially if the latter had shattered her femur. She had thrown up blood, which was proof that one bullet had hit a lung—that was bad. Her thigh wasn't bleeding yet so it must have missed all major arteries and veins. He thanked God, if there was one, for that.
They got to the hospital and a doctor with an emergency crew was waiting for them—one of the men must have called. Zechs wasn't sure how smart that was--in case the enemy intercepted the call.
The doors flew open and ten pairs of hands reached for his little sister. He watched her being wheeled away, so pale and small. Then it occurred to him he was being left behind. He jumped out and grabbed her hand desperately and yelled at the doctor, "You've got to keep her some place very private. No one can know that she's here!"
The physician nodded solemnly as they wheeled her into an operating room and Zechs was forced to leave her, watching her disappear through the sterile white swinging doors.
He turned and sank onto the floor of the dusty hospital and rested his hands on his knees. What in heavens name was he going to do?
Tai sat in the dusty pub with Emi and Vince. Emi downed another shot and let it slam on to the counter. "Anover!" he slurred.
"I think that's enough vodka for you…" Vince told him, a bit tipsy himself, pulling the tiny empty glass away from his hand.
Tai just rested his chin on his arms and stared ahead at the shelves of booze behind the bar. It always amazed him how much money people would waste on such things—anything that wasn't necessary. Drinking isn't necessary, smoking isn't, pretty frilly curtains aren't, and a pair of shoes to go with each silly dress isn't either….
"It's not so bad though…we're still alive," Tai finally said.
Emi laughed. "Yes, but you have not vitnessed the vrath of mine fam-ily," Emi told him waving a shaky finger at him and stifling a hiccup. "I vill be…vhat is the vord for it? Vere you are tied up and pulled…"
"Drawn and quartered," Vince supplied.
"YES! DRAVN and QUVATERED! THAT is vhat I vill be!!!"
"Okay, chill out with the 'w's—they're wiving mwe a headawcke," Vince teased. Emi glared and reached for the glass the bartender handed him and brought it to his mouth, daring one of his friends to stop him.
"It was just a test," Vince muttered softly looking at the bottom of his own mug, where there was only a bit of amber liquid left, and foam on the sides drizzling down in streaks. "Why do stupid pieces of paper have to matter so much?" he asked, draining the last drops.
"Because we write down what we know on those pieces of paper and if we don't know enough we could kill someone," Tai told him curtly. Vince chuckled and consequently choked on his last bit of beer.
"You didn't do so bad though, so you can't talk."
"But I've got a girl all mad at me."
There was a loud thump beside Vince and they both looked over to see Emi passed out on the floor. "Well, at least we know he won't try to drive home," he said sarcastically, then continued, "What girl are you talking about?"
"Siduri confessed her love to me right after the exam last week." Tai wasn't entirely sure if he should be sharing this with anyone but it felt appropriate. It had been on his mind all week and he hadn't been able to talk much to Donny lately because of work and it was different with Huy now because he was so far away and involved in his own life—Tai had always thought his life was complicated, but it was nothing to Huy's married life. Moreover, since they'd just gotten their scores today and he'd done well and both of them had done very poorly, he thought it might make them feel better to see he had problems too.
Vince let his glass fall to the counter. "You're kidding me, right? I mean…it's, it's…Siduri! She's not female or something!"
"Well, apparently she is after all." He still had his chin on his elbows. Vince shook his head and rubbed his temples.
"What did you tell her?"
"That I wasn't interested in a relationship."
"Is that true?"
"Yes."
"Not with anyone?"
"Not with anyone."
"Are you honestly sure?"
"Honestly."
"Honestly, truly?"
"Vince, quit it. Let's get Emi home. I'm tired."
Vince grinned not completely innocently and stood up carefully. Tai decided to make sure most of Emi's weight was on him and not his tipsy friend. It took them ten minutes to walk shakily to Vince's car and Tai quickly took the keys. He was not about to let Vince drive. After handing Emi over to his roommates and dropping Vince off, he turned to go home and jacked up the volume as high as it would go on the radio. He didn't want to hear about it. Then the news came on and he groaned. He'd have to listen to this report all over again, and get all worried about Relena all over again and not be able to get any information from Donny about it. He'd called Duo up, but he didn't know anything, and it was killing him inside. Not even Emi and Vince had completely distracted him.
Three days ago she'd been on one of the colonies trying to help the new leadership reform a few legislations, but there had been a shooting and Relena was missing. Several people claimed to have seen her get shot, but there were no security cameras to confirm anything besides eyewitness accounts—someone had jacked into the security system and put the tapes on repeat, preventing any recording from taking place.
But he couldn't think about that…not now.
Too quickly he was home and, yet again, the apartment was black. The little old lady upstairs was asleep too so it was silent, except the occasional yowl from one of her many cats probably attacking one of the purple flowers of her vibrant carpet. He flopped down on the couch and flipped on the TV to a movie channel. He didn't care what was on, just as long as it was mind numbing. He didn't want the blackness to seep into him too much further.
At first, when the phone rang, he didn't realized what the sound was, but then it dawned on him and he jumped up to get it, turning down the TV a little. Who would call at three in the morning?
"Hello?" he asked gruffly.
"Tai?"
"Z…" he started but was quickly interrupted.
"Don't say my name. Just in case."
"Okay."
"I've got some cargo here. Do you think you could take care of it for me for a while?"
Tai thought a minute. His brain was a little slow right now. "I could do that."
"I'll be there tomorrow, about this same time."
"Sure." And he hung up. Tai put the phone down again and laid back on the couch, his head suspended in air off the end. He stretched his arms over his head all the way to the floor. Looking at the room upside down was interesting, a new perspective.
And she was alive.
Wufei was not in the mood to hassle with these stupid kids. But it was almost time to let them leave him for the day. Be still his heart….
He walked with them to the mess hall and watched them cram down their food—he'd been extra hard on them today, cranking up the thermostat to 100 degrees Fahrenheit, sending them on fifteen goat-trails, military style lifting. He'd been surprised when one guy did 140 pounds in the military lift—thus they'd worked up an appetite. He had found a few decent pilots among them, but he wasn't sure about their character and that was just as important, if not more so. And it would be nice to get back to real work on the project, and maybe Heero had given them another installation of the program—Trowa had taken over scanning Donny the past few days. But he wouldn't be liking the pressure from all the spy work they were all helping with.
A soft voice sounded at his ear, jarring him from his musings and he turned to see one of his newbies crouching down and looking very nervous.
"What is it?"
"Sir….Juliano is missing sir."
"What?" Juliano…Juliano…oh yah! That oddly aggressive girl…
"Juliano, sir, she's been missing since we practiced earlier today sir."
Wufei narrowed his eyes. "And where do you think might be a good place to start looking for her, Private?"
The young man looked intensely uncomfortable but with Wufei's glares he crumbled. "You might look in the girl's locker room, sir."
"Thank you." He watched as the young man snuck off and Wufei wondered what that girl had gotten herself into. But it must be a conspiracy among the men, or else the private wouldn't have been so nervous. And military peers were not easy on tattle-tails.
Finishing the rest of his meal quickly, he left the men and walked back to the training room. The closer he got the more quickly he walked as an eerie feeling grew inside of him till he got to the actual locker room stairs going down under ground and he began to run. He'd seen things happened to girls in the army before and though they may be weak which is why those things happened to them, it didn't mean they deserved it.
The room was just like the boys locker room but smaller. It looked like a dank dungeon just like the other one, smelling faintly sweet of marijuana. Wufei had always wondered about that….
It looked normal except an open locker. He walked over and saw several articles of women's clothing, including a moldering set of army sweats. There was a picture wedged into the metal in the back of a locker, a little girl sitting on a woman's lap, both of which covered in ribbons and braided hair in bright, flowery dresses and hibiscus flowers around their necks.
There was a change in the noises of the room. It wasn't an odd noise but just a variant from the norm. Wufei jumped and listened carefully, attempting to determine the origin. There was a metal wire cage full of equipment in the middle of the room which was blocking him from the source.
He walked over to it and looked around but didn't see anything, except the two bathroom stalls in the corner. He still didn't see anything but decided to check the stalls anyway.
A rat ran across the floor and he almost jumped. What the heck was wrong with him? Why was he so jumpy all of a sudden, eh? It was just a girls' locker room. But a second later he had his gun out anyway, convincing himself that it was completely normal to have a gun out.
He kicked the first door in and--surprise, surprise--there was nothing there. Stepping over to the second one he kicked and at the same time something flew out from it, lunging at him with a banshee-like yell. He stepped back out of the way just in time to see Juliano clad in a very ripped army tank top, half of her chest exposed and bleeding, and her underwear holding a long rusty piece of metal. She was shaking with fury and terror, her eyes huge and pupils dilated to an impossibly large diameter; her shoulders were down and squared. She looked like a she-bear defending her cubs. When she saw who it was, her already very dilated eyes widened even more (Wufei hadn't thought that possible) and her face collapsed along with her body.
Wufei reached forward and caught her before she hit the hard concrete floor and at the same time heard a piece of the ceiling tile land in the toilet, its lining frame gone. He turned over the girl and saw that her face was beaten too—a black eye and a large rip in the skin around her mouth. One shoulder was twisted back in an impossible position and her legs were coated in scabbed over cuts. She'd been hiding in here for a long time.
Water, he thought. Glancing over at the nearest sink he did a double-take. The mirror above it was cracked in a bulls-eye fashion, stained lightly with red.
She shook in his arms and didn't say anything. He was completely unprepared to deal with something like this so he did what he'd seen other mothers do with their injured children—it was all he could think of. He pulled her up into sitting position and held her tightly. She shook violently and then started to cry. Weeping was more like it for the tears fell so silently and he doubted such a girl was capable of true bawling.
"You're safe now. I'm not going to let anyone hurt you," he murmured.
He felt her cling to him harder and her lithe little body shook even more. So he sat there more and rubbed her back till she had cried herself into exhaustion and fell asleep in his arms. Now he was in a sticky position.
Wufei wormed his way from her arms and found a clean towel from the showers. He warily wrapped it around her and picked her up then carried her up to the infirmary.
Tai sat in his "sparkling" clean room fidgeting and pacing. It was two thirty now and Relena should be here soon. He'd spent the rest of his sleepless night cleaning the apartment and most especially his room. Insomnia was the pits but how could he sleep with all this going on? With harboring Relena, working undercover, and school on top of it all--this was the first time in his life he'd ever admitted to himself that he might be just a little suicidal.
She'd have to stay hidden in there whenever Donny was home. He'd gone to the library and picked out about ten random books for her. He wasn't entirely sure what she liked to read so he picked out one from each genre and hoped she liked at least one of them.
He tried to open a book and study but it just wasn't working, he couldn't concentrate and it was so frustrating. Time was smiting him. And he'd had his first day of rotations today—he'd gotten lost in the hospital of all things. He felt utterly ridiculous. And then he spaced out and forgot how to lock a wheel chair down. Of all the retarded things for him to do! He'd been doing it since he was eighteen for crying out loud! It wasn't like it was complicated or anything.
His little bedroom was not serving him well enough so he migrated into the living room and paced some more. Then he pulled out his laptop and tried to work on the OS more for Zechs. He had a disc to give directly to him when he dropped off Relena, but maybe he could work some more on it. Then the TV went on and he paced till he figured he'd better stop so as to not wear a ring in the carpet.
Finally, some very dim headlights shined through the tiny basement windows near the ceiling and Tai jumped up and ran to the door. As he climbed up the stairs and man stood at the top holding a duffle bag. Tai nodded to him and he looked behind the man to see another man holding what looked like a tent bag. He waved them down the stairs and saw that the man with the duffle was Trowa, and the other was Zechs, his hair tied back and tucked into his jacket to be less recognizable, and he held Relena.
"Where do I put her?"
Tai lead them down the hall to his room. "Donny's been at work a ton lately thanks to you guys so she'll be able to freely roam the apartment so long as she stays quiet—the landlady upstairs might hear her."
"That shouldn't be too much of an issue anyway. Part of the reason we wanted you to take care of her is because out of the people we trust and could take her, you know the most about medicine."
Tai's eyes flew to Relena and she looked her over much more carefully.
"I brought her medical chart—copied it." Zechs handed it to Tai who glanced over it quickly and raised an eyebrow.
"She was lucky."
"You have no idea," Trowa said quietly.
"Then you can take care of her medical needs too?"
"Yah, I can do that," Tai assured him as he handed him the disc. Zechs didn't ask any questions about it, he knew what it was and pocketed it.
Then Zechs nodded a sigh of relief. "We better go."
"Does she know that you were taking her here?" Tai asked quickly.
"We told her but we aren't sure how lucid she was at the time. She may not remember. You may want to tread lightly, if you know what I mean."
Tai nodded and the two left quickly. Then he turned back to look at the pale girl. It was just one thing after another. On the upside, he now had a beautiful bedroom ornament….
Tai slept fitfully on the couch. Every squeak, every pitter-patter made him jump ten feet in the air. He was paranoid having Relena in the apartment and no gun to protect her with. Stupid habit—surely he could take care of her without a gun.
He flopped over on his back and stared at the ceiling. Funny how much things had changed—he was actually living without owning a gun and sleeping with it.
Donny didn't come home that night. Relena hadn't woken up and it was now Saturday which was just as well, it gave Tai an excuse to avoid Siduri. He'd managed to be on the opposite side of the hospital as her at all times, so the last thing he needed was to run into her in the library.
Tai went into his room that morning he bent down to pick something up when he felt eyes on him. He turned slowly to see Relena staring at him with glazed eyes.
Kneeling next to her, he put a hand on her forehead and turned her face to his. "Can you hear me?" he asked her softly.
She blinked twice before answering, her blue eyes sunken in. Her mouth felt like a dust-storm and tasted like rotting fish. "Tai?" She breathed too hard and gasped—since when did it hurt to breathe!
"Yah?"
"Where am I?" At least she could see now, not that there was much to see in the barren, sterile bedroom.
"In my apartment. My bedroom. Your brother dropped you off here. You'll be staying here till you are well enough to go home, okay?"
"You're taking care of me again," she smirked, and then sighed, resigning herself the situation. Why was everyone saving her—she was supposed to save them!
But he was smiling at her now and she couldn't help but feel just a little bit better. "How do you feel?"
"Groggy," she said after a moment of deliberation. "And thirsty."
"I'll go get you something," Tai told her and went to the kitchen. As he shut the door, she couldn't resist it, it just came out. "I missed you." But he didn't turn around.
Relena put down her book. It was the fifth one she'd read in three days. It was driving her crazy being cooped up in Tai's little apartment. But it was better than the hospital and Tai was very accommodating. He'd bring her books and food and movies and newspapers. Anything she wanted. But she had to be careful when he wasn't around. If she limped into the living room to watch TV, for example, she wouldn't have a prayer of limping back into hiding if Donny came home. And unfortunately Tai pulled sixteen to twenty hour days.
She stretched and the regretted it because her side started hurting again.
But that wasn't the worst of it all. She couldn't even make it to the bathroom or take a shower without help. Not that he was actually physically scrubbing her down or anything, but he did have to carry her in there and wait for her to call him to carry her back. That was humiliating. She'd never appreciated being able to do those simple bodily functions on her own so much in her life.
And then there was the sound of him coming home. It was her favorite time of day.
He always opened the door quickly but shut it quietly and slowly so that if she was asleep she wouldn't be wakened, at least that was her favorite explanation. His steps were even but firm, a very distinctive walk. And then he would timidly peek into his room to see if she was awake. It was adorable.
Then he'd go through the ritual of bandage fixings, changing--all the fun stuff--and ask her if she wanted dinner.
He was always tired. She could see the lines around his eyes. But he was always nice and always ready to help her all he could. It made her love him that much more….darn it.
But then she had to fight too keep her temper because she was inactive and impatient and the world was falling apart at her finger tips and she wanted to DO something, anything. Instead she was stuck here, even if the scenery was nice from the tiny basement windows—lots of green grass and orange and red and yellow and brown trees. Soon the leaves would cover up the little window.
She was going to crack soon; she could feel it coming on faster and faster every day.
He pulled out the little envelope Heero had slipped into his pocket while at his apartment. He looked it over and flipped it over in his hands before he popped it into the simulator.
He put on his helmet and narrowed his eyes to focus on the screen. A green grid popped into view with various icons in the corners. Tapping the touch screen, he selected the settings he wanted.
Immediately ships began to fly at him and he activated the controls. But it was like flying through silk—the program ran flawlessly and reacted instantaneously. It was unbelievable.
"Zechs!"
He jumped and pulled the helmet off. "Noin? What are you yelling at me for?"
"I've been calling you for the past ten minutes. But I guess you couldn't exactly hear me with that thing on. Wufei's just called. He said to tell you he'll be on the project again tomorrow."
"But he's training now."
"Well, it sounds like he's decided he's had enough of training."
Zechs nodded in resignation. Wufei was too stubborn. You could order him to do one thing and he'd walk his own way smirking behind him. "In the meantime, while I've got your attention, I was wondering if you interested in eating dinner tonight," she told him, massaging his shoulders from behind.
He shrugged and got up, reluctantly leaving the OS behind. He'd come back to it tonight.
Sure enough the next morning Wufei was in his office but before he could ask a single question there was a huge crash.
"What is happening in here!" he yelled, leaning over the overhanging ledge that looked down on the construction.
Trowa and Quatre were running to the fighters. Quatre yelled up distractedly, "We've got it under control!" But then yelped as he accidentally ran into a metal pole.
Zechs glared at the scene for a few minutes but then was reminded of his meeting with Wufei when the subject in question coughed, clearing his throat. "I guess we'll leave it to them…" he muttered and reseated himself in the small control room he used as an office. "Why aren't you training to men?"
"Oh, I am. I still have one last lesson to give them, but that's not for a couple hours. I wanted to inform you that I coming back. And decided newbies aren't the way to go—looking at the records of tried and true soldiers will be a much better judge, I think."
"Your call. I'm delegating this to you."
"Sir?" Zechs couldn't help but be satisfied by the surprised look on Wufei's face.
"I said I'm letting you decide the other pilots. I've had enough of it and I need to work on other things. You're dismissed."
Wufei would have loved to wipe that smug smirk off of Zechs face, but he didn't have the energy right now.
He was just leaving when Quatre came in and flopped down in a chair. "We don't know what's wrong with them but something is acting up."
Wufei shrugged to no one in particular. This wasn't his jurisdiction. He walked purposefully down the white halls and turned the corner. The infirmary was just down the hall, and he felt a strange sense of duty to Juliano.
The infirmary door swung open and the nurse at the desk smiled at him. "She's still in the same room," she told him, indicating the direction for him to go. He nodded briskly and strode down the hall.
He knocked before pushing open the door. Juliano was sitting under the covers with a book in her hands. She glanced nonchalantly at him, then did a double take and put the book down. "Sir?"
"How are you?" The skin around her eyes had matured to a brilliant shade of purple mottled with green; she had a butterfly bandage on her lip and her arm in a sling.
"I've been better." She grimaced.
He seated himself in the only chair there was in the typical boy style—legs wide apart and hands resting on his knees. "You want to tell me what happened with you and your little boyfriend?"
"I beg your pardon?" she asked, her face quickly turning an angry red.
"That kid you're always flirting with—what's his name again? I can't remember." Wufei knew he was being stupid, but it was getting a reaction out of her.
"I do NOT flirt—he's been pestering me this entire time. And when I wouldn't sneak out of the compound with him he attacked me. I'm not sure what he expected me to answer him when he sneaked up on me while I was changing in the girl's locker room—" her voice was growing louder with each syllable she uttered. "—and now you have the nerve to suggest that I…" she stopped and stuttered, evidently unable to articulate what he thought she was doing. She seemed to settle for something else. "He tried to RAPE ME!" she screamed. Her chest heaved as if she'd finished running a race.
Wufei continued to look at her calmly. "You know there'll have to be an investigation on this."
"Isn't my body enough proof for you pig-headed sons of-?"
"Watch your language with superiors, Juliano. Respect," he snapped.
"Then be worthy of it!" Then she shut her mouth and stared hard at her hands. She looked like she was having trouble swallowing a few other choice words she had in mind to call him.
Wufei sighed. "If you want to get anywhere in life, you're going to have to learn to control that temper." Then he grinned. "But I won't deny I find it refreshing." She looked up at him in shock. "You'll get through this in the end."
He got up to leave. He found out what he'd come for. Then he noticed the book on her lap. "What's that?"
"A book." He glared at her and she elaborated, reluctantly. "It's just some old college text book. I want to keep current with my major so I can go on to graduate school some time."
"What's your degree?"
"Physics and Aeronautical Engineering, double major—"
Wufei looked up, interested despite himself. "Are you any good?"
"Well, I think I'm excellent," she said smugly.
He nodded at her then left abruptly, leaving her to gape after him in confusion. On to see the newbies and deliver a lesson they'd never forget…
Kiki flipped a lock of dark hair from her eyes and turned the page of her magazine. But politics were boring her.
She rested her hands in her lap and look out the window for a moment, just in time to see a bird fly by. Then they started shaking. She blinked down at them for a bit before her brain registered what they were doing; she grabbed one hand in the other and held it forcefully still.
She had to get out of this place.
Climbing out of bed, her wounds started aching again. Moving never hurt so much. She walked over to the little bathroom and stopped, stunned, in front of the mirror. She looked like Frankenstein's bride—no, Frankenstein's bride's dog. Better yet, Frankenstein's bride's dog's flea—okay, that was getting a bit much.
A terry-cloth bathrobe hung in the corner. She wrapped it around herself, and felt a little safer.
Cautiously, she looked both ways before completely opening the door. Sidling out and skulking by the hallway walls, she felt like a criminal sneaking out. But that wasn't right either. She wanted to be invisible.
No one took much notice of her as they strode past her, which she was thankful for.
But then a nurse called to her. "What are you doing out of bed?"
A lump formed in her throat—how come she couldn't talk? She talked to Chang okay…. She struggled for a minute before she could croak out, "Just out for a walk…"
The nurse gave her a look. "If you aren't back in ten minutes I'm coming for you."
Kiki nodded meekly, and a ripple through her mind asked, why are you so compliant? Nothing answered.
She exited her area in the infirmary and wandered aimlessly. A stretcher whizzed by so that she had to suck herself to the walk so as to not get run over by the three workers wheeling it by or by the squeaking wheels.
The face under the sheet had an oxygen mask, pallid and waxy. A small gasp escaped as she recognized him…he'd put her here in the first place.
She was numb, but she knew she had to get back to her room, fast.
"Hey, you must feel pretty special—the only girl in our group, future specials no less. You're going to get a lot of attention."
She didn't appreciate where his eyes roamed at all, and intended to let him know. "Maybe if I wanted that I'd like it, but since I'm here to work and learn not to sleep around, it's not my thing."
He raised one perfect eyebrow incredulously. "Well why else would a girl join if she didn't want-"
"Don't finish that sentence. I already think you're a moron, don't make me start wondering how you fit your head through that door too."
Her stomach started to clench and unclench almost in a rhythmic fashion. It was not pleasant. She stumbled through the swinging white door, hunched over. That same nurse was behind the desk, watching her with hawk eyes. She forced herself into an upright position, but she wanted to scream in pain, and terror.
"Nice move there, Juliano. You're getting pretty good at this game," he told her, looking over her shoulder at the simulator.
"Whatever," she retorted tonelessly. Why wasn't this moron leaving her alone, she was trying to concentrate!
"Hey, I just paid you a compliment. Don't I deserve a thank you?" She refused to turn and see his expression. He leaned over and whispered in her ear, his breath caused little hairs that had escaped her pony-tail to tickle her ear. "Hey, this is kind of boring. I bet I can think of something we'd both enjoy…"
"Suck it you bastard," she whispered through gritted teeth.
His look of fury was priceless—she saw it reflected in her monitor.
"I wouldn't be so cocky if I were you…" Then Chang walked up to them and barked some insults.
There it was, just ahead, that little baby-blue blur with the gray dot off-center. She clawed at the knob. And pulled herself inside. She went to the bathroom and clung to the sink for a moment. But she didn't want to look up—then she saw it again. She saw him, in her eyes.
Cocky—too cocky—she deserved what she got….
A door closed softly from the side. She whirled around. She was the only girl; she should be the only one here.
"Who's there?" She felt a little foolish when no one answered, as she stood there in her skibbies. But she had to check.
She had just turned around when she heard it.
"Juliano…" it was whispered, almost inaudible. And it made every hair stand on end and every sense screamed out in fright.
She revolved and reached behind her for her duffle bag, and more importantly, her knife that was in it.
"Juliano, I know you want some of this. Come take a little trip with me." She jumped at the soft voice behind her, but she was terrified to look behind her. Her hand brushed something that was neither her locker nor its contents.
"You know, you'll aim better if you turn around and look."
"Maybe I don't want to." She kept her voice strong. Did he think he could scare her? Well, even if he did, she'd never let him see. Not on his life.
"Oh, but I can make you."
"You can't make me do anything." And before he could grab her she swung around kicking the bench behind her and ran for the door.
He chased after her and caught her by the ankles. She fell hard on the concrete floor, her chin throbbing along with her ankles. He yanked her down so that she was under him.
"You know you were asking for this," he whispered in her ear, yanking at her shirt. "You're just a little army slut, that's the only reason they let girls in. They can't fight. They're only good for one thing..."
"Gee, and here I thought that's what you were here for—to keep your little friends busy," she spat back, kneeing him in the groin and rolling out from under him. She ran to a shower, looking for a weapon.
The sink…she pulled way from the bathroom, backing way, stumbling on her own feet. Then the bed caught her in the back, but she didn't notice. She kept blindly walking backwards.
I deserved it, what was I thinking that I could do this, I'm a girl. That's what Dad always said, I'm just a girl. He told Mom she was good for one thing. I'm just a girl and I can't do it so I must be asking for it….
He seized her wrist and flung her at the sink. Her head cracked against the mirror, her back collided with the porcelain tub with a horrible crack, and then she bounced forward onto the floor. She grabbed her head, feeling a warm sticky fluid between her fingers and looked up so see his face right at hers. Her jaw dropped.
"I don't understand why they let little weaklings like you in the army. You can't do any good. They should just let you loose on the town—you could serve the same purpose there, but at least you'd be making some good money."
She wanted to tell him how disgusting he was, but her mind was else where—the door.
I'm nothing.
I'm empty nothingness….
She buried her face in her hands and sank to the floor.
She had never been anything.
Relena eased her leg off the bed. It was cramping again from lack of use and spurts of sudden walking. It hurt like blue blazes. But that was only when she wasn't struggling to breathe.
She worked her way slowly to the kitchen. Donny was out of town with work so she knew she was free to roam when Tai wasn't here.
But he said he'd be home early today, seven. She thought maybe it'd be nice if she made dinner for him. After all, he was hiding her and protecting her and feeding her and, well, a lot of other things.
The fridge was packed despite that only two lived in the apartment. Mostly because Donny had been doing a lot of binge beer drinking lately and he kept his supply in the fridge—cool at all times. Relena had heard Tai fussing at him for it the other night and threatening to throw his supply out. Luckily, Donny was a mellow drunk and didn't answer, at least not that she'd heard.
She found an old tomato and some peas and green pepper. In the pantry she found a small store of pasta. It wasn't such a hard thing to make angel hair. She'd made it with her Mom as a teenager, assuming she could still remember how to do it.
The stove warmed up fast and she carefully stirred the milk and water with the noodles—she didn't want to burn anything.
Turning for the plate of chopped chicken, her foot caught the edge of a stool and she tripped on her bad foot, and the right side of her body crashed into the counter. Pain tore through her and she bit back the scream as she fumbled to the floor.
There was no air, she didn't have any air, she couldn't get any air. Panic rose in her, but then she stopped and closed her eyes, willing the green to leave, she kept seeing green everywhere.
The boiling pan above her called her back to reality and she steadied herself, breathing carefully and slowly. In, out, in out…she had to do this on her own. She couldn't sit here and wait for Tai to come home and pick her up from the ground and figuratively kiss her boo-boos.
Placing a hand on the tile, she gritted her teeth and pushed up, pulling herself forward. Sweat poured down her face. She felt disgusting.
Halfway up, she started to fall and she grabbed on to the oven door—and crashed to the ground again as the oven opened.
She glared at the offending appliance. This was ridiculous. She was getting beaten up by kitchen equipment.
One more time, she chanted inwardly. She grabbed the counter and yanked up. Surprisingly, she didn't fall this time and smiled at herself, trying desperately to ignore the pain. She was sure when he changed the bandages he'd notice some extra bleeding. But that didn't matter. She got up all on her own. That was an accomplishment!
She was singing quietly to herself and giving her concoction a stir when the door opened above her. And his regular steps led him down the stairs.
"Relena, what are you doing out here? I wasn't home yet!"
"Don't worry. Donny's gone all weekend, you said so! And I was being quiet. And as much as I love your room, I was getting a little sick of it."
He sighed and stood behind her. "What are you doing?"
Her heart thumped faster and her mind's monologue scolded it. "Dinner. Are you hungry? I thought it might be nice for you to have a nice warm meal after pulling such a long day. You left at four—you must be exhausted."
"How are your ribs, your leg?" he inquired seriously, putting one hand to her ribs. She closed her eyes and sucked in a breath. "That painful?" He started to lift her shirt to check the bandages.
"Could you stop playing doctor for two minutes and at least give me a warning?" That was unnerving…
"Sorry. Turn around." She did so after replacing the lid on the pot. "You're bleeding through. What happened?"
"I fell."
He grimaced. "Some fall. You were doing really well."
She attempted a shrug but it was kind of difficult with Tai hanging around her waist. At least she always wore shorts here; it made it easier for him to check her leg.
"And thanks."
"For what?"
"For thinking of me," Tai explained.