I do not own Harry Potter.
Come Back, Maniac.
Chapter One: Welcome Back.
Harry walked up to his mother's home and knocked. He had to live SOMEWHERE.
Flashback time!
Avada Kedavra, etc. etc.
End of Flashback time!
Knock Knock. Hi. How are you? Good. What have you been doing recently? Murdering People of course! Really? No, I've been drinking chais and watching soaps. What else?
Of course, that's my little yuppie boy.
Of course. As always, the little yuppie.
Yes! Your just in time for Oprah!
Ehh..
Flashback time!
I'm not gonna go to Azkaban, Fuck that! I'll go to my hopefully-changed-for-the-better-mom!
END!
Harry walked inside.
Oprah was on. He watched it.
A woman wanted to have a baby, but not give birth. Usually they would give her some diseased baby with AIDS and cancer to them, but they had a big surprise. After these words from our sponsers.
What a surprise. They have been tampering with her birth control pills.
Flashback Time!
He walked up to the door, and there was a note,
"
We will give you you're family for 300,000 dollars.
If you do not give us the money under 3 days, we will kill them all."
END!
OF THEIR LIVES!
He then killed the kidnapper, resurrected his family, and lived happily ever after.
Sorta Kinda.
He would have to tell his mother sooner or later before the coppers came.
Uh oh.