Part Twenty Five
Karen sat stunned as the gallery emptied around her. "Are you all right?" Helen asked as she moved passed her. "Fine," Karen replied, but they could all see that she wasn't. Seeing that George was staying with Karen, the three of them walked up the steps and away. When the court was empty, George simply waited. She had absolutely no idea what might be going through Karen's head, or how to help her. But Karen eventually answered the second question for her. "I'd better go and see how Lauren is after that," She said, finally seeming to come out of her inner contemplation. "Not right now you're not," George said firmly but quietly. They were still for a while longer until Karen broke the silence. "Do you know something," She said bitterly. "The one story he never changed was that he loved me. Every bloody time something happened, like him being caught with Maxi's knickers, or after Dockley alleged he was trying to rape her on the night he was stabbed, every time he used the old line of, you know I love you, don't you Karen. Jesus," She suddenly said in disgust. "I knew he'd beaten up Shell Dockley, I remember telling him that when his suspension was lifted. I knew he'd done that to her and I still ended up sleeping with him a few months later. He even came out with that after the night you and Jo were trying to prosecute him for." "You can't actually say it, can you," George said in realisation. "I loathe the word rape," Karen said matter-of-factly. "It's a very ugly word, but it just isn't big enough to describe what it actually means. So no, I never know how to describe what Fenner did." "Do you think he really did love you?" "Yes, I've no doubt about that. Fenner had a way of detaching himself from everything he'd done that he wouldn't really like to admit to. He didn't want to think himself capable of assaulting anyone in whatever form, so he would simply block it from his mind, making him able to deny any resulting accusations with total plausibility. The night Fenner, raped me," she said, recoiling from her own words. "He said that the one regret he had was that he'd lost me. From what Lauren said today, it sounds like he regretted that right to the end. I really wish I didn't know that. It's almost as if he was determined to keep just a bit of me for ever, and I hate to say it, but he's probably achieved his goal because that isn't something I'm ever likely to forget." "When did you first know about Ritchie's letter to Lauren?" George asked. "The day after Fenner was killed," Karen replied. "On the day I came to your office, on the day I almost told you everything. Lauren was right in what she said to me that day. She said that I didn't want to know how, just why." "And how did the why make you feel?" "I don't think I knew what to feel. For the whole of that week it was all I could do to keep it to myself. John came to see me on the Thursday, supposedly to find out how your day's punishment had gone. But you know John, he only needs the slightest excuse to begin a conquest. I was so scared of seeing him. Hiding what I knew from you was difficult, but I knew that hiding anything from John would be all but impossible. Everything was fine, until he asked how it was going, working with Fenner and constructing a case against him." "Yes, I can see how that must have been awkward." "I felt so guilty for betraying everything the three of you were doing for me." "Darling, listen to me," George said firmly, the term of endearment coming to her as naturally as Karen's name. "There wasn't anything else you could have done. If you had told me or John, you'd have very likely landed yourself and Yvonne and Lauren behind bars, and that wouldn't have helped anyone. You didn't ask Ritchie Atkins to write that letter and you didn't ask Lauren to follow it through. Just because Fenner realised too late what he'd lost, does not make you guilty of anything. You had absolutely no idea that Lauren was going to do what she did. James Fenner's murder is not your fault, and blaming yourself for not being able to prevent it won't do you or anyone else any good. Lauren got herself in to this mess, and you couldn't have done anything to stop her." After a moment's silence, Karen said, "I'm sorry. I think you got more than you bargained for by being here this week, didn't you." "Apart from the obvious, I'm glad I was. When you get to know someone, you take the rough with the smooth. It just so happens that this is one of the roughest weeks you've probably ever had. That doesn't make me regret being here in the slightest." A little while later when they got up to go, George started up the steps ahead of Karen, but when she was standing on the first step, Karen turned George to face her. "Thank you," She said, putting her arms round George. "I don't know if I could have dealt with this without you." "Yes, you could," George said as she returned the hug. "I don't think you're aware of it, but you're far stronger than anyone I know, even John, and I used to think his emotional armour was made of steal." Standing so close, and with George slightly higher than normal, it seemed only natural for her to gently place her lips on Karen's. It seemed far longer since they'd done this than only the previous night, but it was something they both knew they needed. Eventually detaching her lips from Karen's and looking slightly flushed, George said, "Are you busy tomorrow evening?" "I doubt it," Said Karen with a small smile, suddenly remembering just what tomorrow was. "Then can I return the offer of dinner?" "I expect so," Replied Karen, giving George one last kiss. As they walked up the rest of the steps towards the door at the back of the gallery, they both knew that they wanted to get to know the other far better than they already did, innermost skeletons and all.
As soon as Jo emerged from court, Yvonne came up to her. "Have you got a minute?" She asked. "Because I think we need to talk." Thinking she just might know what was coming, Jo led the way back to the witness room where Yvonne and Cassie had spent the last four days waiting for their turn to go on the stand. When Jo had closed the door, she moved over to the window, pushing up the old wooden sash and digging for her cigarettes. "I thought we couldn't smoke in here," Yvonne said joining her. "Tough," Jo said succinctly. "Judging by the conversation I think we're about to have, nicotine is essential." "Precisely what did Lauren come out with in court today, that made everyone, including the judge, look at me oddly at lunchtime?" Yvonne asked as she lit a cigarette and blew the smoke out of the open window. "Lauren alluded to something when I first spoke to her a year ago, something that I didn't probe into too deeply, because it was entirely your business and I knew that if either of you thought it was important to Lauren's defence, you'd have told me. So, I wasn't expecting her to tell the story she did in court today." "Jo, you've got me really worried now," Yvonne said firmly. "Just tell me what she said." "Lauren told the court about the argument you had with Charlie when he started teaching Ritchie to shoot." Yvonne strove to keep her face as blank as possible, but Jo didn't miss the brief flash of pain and humiliation. "I wish she hadn't done that," Yvonne said eventually. "I know," Jo said gently. "And I know that if you'd had a choice about this, that you wouldn't have wanted anyone to know about that. But it really isn't a reflection on you or anything you did or didn't do." "Jesus," Said Yvonne in disgust. "You really are bloody naive at times. Have you got any idea how a jury will react to what Charlie did to me and the way he insisted on bringing up his children? They'll see that Lauren didn't have any alternative but to turn out like she has. Charlie insisted on bringing his children up in a culture of violence, and I couldn't do a bloody thing about it. About the only thing Lauren does have in her defence is that she had a rotten mother who totally failed to keep her on the straight and narrow." "Yvonne," Jo said, trying to calm her down. "You have done everything possible to help your daughter, and it is absolutely not your fault that she has ended up where she is." Tears were raining down Yvonne's cheeks by this time and she was having great difficulty in preventing herself from completely letting go. But on taking a breath to disagree with Jo, she was interrupted by the door quietly opening behind them. "Actually, I quite agree," John said quietly as he entered the room, having heard Jo's words as he approached. Both women turned to face him, combined looks of annoyance and irritation on their faces, telling him in no uncertain terms that they would both rather not have been disturbed. "Mrs. Atkins," John said, walking over to them, but Yvonne held up a hand. "Yvonne'll do," She said, trying to stem her flow of tears. "I don't especially like being reminded that I was once married to that bastard." "After what I heard in court today," John replied amiably. "I'm not surprised." "Why did you have to pursue that?" Yvonne asked, turning back to Jo. "Why did you have to let her say that to all and sundry?" "To give Jo credit," John put in before Jo could answer. "It was I who persisted in getting to the truth. Your daughter didn't want to tell the court about what your husband did to you. I think her words were, my mother wouldn't like me to tell that to a court. But I insisted." "Why?" Yvonne asked in quite a small voice. "Because the jury needed to know," John insisted gently. "But how can knowing what Charlie did whenever things didn't go his way help the jury to make their decision?" "It will help them to see why it was impossible for you to do more than you did to keep your children away from crime." "Yvonne," Jo suddenly said, remembering something from her conversation with Yvonne a year ago. "Do you remember what you said to me on the day you asked me to defend Lauren? You told me that once you marry someone like Charlie Atkins, you're in for life, and that the only way you get out is in a coffin." John winced. "Sounds like something I'd come out with," Yvonne said with a rueful smile. "I want you to tell that to the jury," Jo said quietly. "Now that, I can see the point of," Yvonne replied. "I just wish Lauren hadn't said what she did today, that's all." "It isn't your fault that Charlie Atkins treated you the way he did," John said firmly but gently. "I do hope that isn't pity I can see in your eyes, Judge," Yvonne said, unconsciously adopting the name Coope always gave him. "Not entirely," John said, thinking that it was more sympathy than pity but knowing she wouldn't like it. "Well, I don't want to see it," Yvonne said firmly. "I should have tried harder to stop Charlie raising his children the way he did, and I suppose the way both Ritchie and Lauren turned out is the result." "You cannot blame yourself for where your children have ended up," John insisted. "Oh, and you'd say that if it was your daughter in this mess, would you?" "George routinely blames my liberal attitude of bringing up our daughter for why she has occasionally taken the law in to her own hands, but I don't agree. We can only do our best for our children, no more, no less. What they do as a result is up to them, and if they end up on the wrong side of the law because of their actions, we do everything possible to help them, which is exactly what you've been doing ever since this happened." Yvonne was touched. She'd always known there was something different about this judge, ever since he'd been prepared to allow her to see her son on the day of his sentencing, and by the way he'd supported Karen both before and after Fenner's death. But here he was, talking to her about the highs and lows of parenting of all things. Laying a hand on Yvonne's shoulder, John briefly rubbed it, in an attempt to offer some sort of comfort for what she was going through. After a moment's silence, John fixed Jo with a mocking frown and said, "The thing that attracted me to your discussion, Mrs. Mills, was your clear disobedience of the no smoking rule which I know you are aware of in this building." "And as I said to Yvonne when she very kindly reminded me of it," Said Jo, also trying to lighten the communal mood. "Tough." "I'd like to see you say that to Lawrence James," John said with a laugh. "He's not one of those two pathetic little wankers who were in the gallery at Ritchie's trial, is he?" "A perfect description," John said with a smile. "though I really shouldn't be seen to be encouraging the use of such vocabulary when discussing the circuit administrator." When they left the witness room not long after, they met George and Karen in the foyer. "Are you all right?" Karen asked in concern. "I probably look about as well as you do," Yvonne said, taking in Karen's still pale expression. As Yvonne and Karen moved off together, clearly in search of a large scotch, the other three stood watching them. "Was Karen all right?" Jo asked. "She will be," Said George, wondering if her deeper involvement with Karen showed. Putting an arm around each of them, John said, "Can I have the pleasure of someone's company tonight? Preferably both of you?" "Forget it," Said George firmly, remembering the debacle of last night. "And I'm still not speaking to you after Tuesday," Jo said, though the little smile, combined with a wink that she gave George, told both of them she didn't really mean it. "You know," Said George in pretended disgust. "That's not the first time you've suggested having both our company at once." "It'd be fun," John said cajolingly. "Not a chance," Jo said firmly. "I'm not that way inclined." As they all walked out towards their cars, and Jo and John continued fondly bickering, George wondered what her blossoming fling with Karen would do to this three-way thing she had going with Jo and John. Above all, just how would Jo react to knowing that George definitely was that way inclined.
Karen sat stunned as the gallery emptied around her. "Are you all right?" Helen asked as she moved passed her. "Fine," Karen replied, but they could all see that she wasn't. Seeing that George was staying with Karen, the three of them walked up the steps and away. When the court was empty, George simply waited. She had absolutely no idea what might be going through Karen's head, or how to help her. But Karen eventually answered the second question for her. "I'd better go and see how Lauren is after that," She said, finally seeming to come out of her inner contemplation. "Not right now you're not," George said firmly but quietly. They were still for a while longer until Karen broke the silence. "Do you know something," She said bitterly. "The one story he never changed was that he loved me. Every bloody time something happened, like him being caught with Maxi's knickers, or after Dockley alleged he was trying to rape her on the night he was stabbed, every time he used the old line of, you know I love you, don't you Karen. Jesus," She suddenly said in disgust. "I knew he'd beaten up Shell Dockley, I remember telling him that when his suspension was lifted. I knew he'd done that to her and I still ended up sleeping with him a few months later. He even came out with that after the night you and Jo were trying to prosecute him for." "You can't actually say it, can you," George said in realisation. "I loathe the word rape," Karen said matter-of-factly. "It's a very ugly word, but it just isn't big enough to describe what it actually means. So no, I never know how to describe what Fenner did." "Do you think he really did love you?" "Yes, I've no doubt about that. Fenner had a way of detaching himself from everything he'd done that he wouldn't really like to admit to. He didn't want to think himself capable of assaulting anyone in whatever form, so he would simply block it from his mind, making him able to deny any resulting accusations with total plausibility. The night Fenner, raped me," she said, recoiling from her own words. "He said that the one regret he had was that he'd lost me. From what Lauren said today, it sounds like he regretted that right to the end. I really wish I didn't know that. It's almost as if he was determined to keep just a bit of me for ever, and I hate to say it, but he's probably achieved his goal because that isn't something I'm ever likely to forget." "When did you first know about Ritchie's letter to Lauren?" George asked. "The day after Fenner was killed," Karen replied. "On the day I came to your office, on the day I almost told you everything. Lauren was right in what she said to me that day. She said that I didn't want to know how, just why." "And how did the why make you feel?" "I don't think I knew what to feel. For the whole of that week it was all I could do to keep it to myself. John came to see me on the Thursday, supposedly to find out how your day's punishment had gone. But you know John, he only needs the slightest excuse to begin a conquest. I was so scared of seeing him. Hiding what I knew from you was difficult, but I knew that hiding anything from John would be all but impossible. Everything was fine, until he asked how it was going, working with Fenner and constructing a case against him." "Yes, I can see how that must have been awkward." "I felt so guilty for betraying everything the three of you were doing for me." "Darling, listen to me," George said firmly, the term of endearment coming to her as naturally as Karen's name. "There wasn't anything else you could have done. If you had told me or John, you'd have very likely landed yourself and Yvonne and Lauren behind bars, and that wouldn't have helped anyone. You didn't ask Ritchie Atkins to write that letter and you didn't ask Lauren to follow it through. Just because Fenner realised too late what he'd lost, does not make you guilty of anything. You had absolutely no idea that Lauren was going to do what she did. James Fenner's murder is not your fault, and blaming yourself for not being able to prevent it won't do you or anyone else any good. Lauren got herself in to this mess, and you couldn't have done anything to stop her." After a moment's silence, Karen said, "I'm sorry. I think you got more than you bargained for by being here this week, didn't you." "Apart from the obvious, I'm glad I was. When you get to know someone, you take the rough with the smooth. It just so happens that this is one of the roughest weeks you've probably ever had. That doesn't make me regret being here in the slightest." A little while later when they got up to go, George started up the steps ahead of Karen, but when she was standing on the first step, Karen turned George to face her. "Thank you," She said, putting her arms round George. "I don't know if I could have dealt with this without you." "Yes, you could," George said as she returned the hug. "I don't think you're aware of it, but you're far stronger than anyone I know, even John, and I used to think his emotional armour was made of steal." Standing so close, and with George slightly higher than normal, it seemed only natural for her to gently place her lips on Karen's. It seemed far longer since they'd done this than only the previous night, but it was something they both knew they needed. Eventually detaching her lips from Karen's and looking slightly flushed, George said, "Are you busy tomorrow evening?" "I doubt it," Said Karen with a small smile, suddenly remembering just what tomorrow was. "Then can I return the offer of dinner?" "I expect so," Replied Karen, giving George one last kiss. As they walked up the rest of the steps towards the door at the back of the gallery, they both knew that they wanted to get to know the other far better than they already did, innermost skeletons and all.
As soon as Jo emerged from court, Yvonne came up to her. "Have you got a minute?" She asked. "Because I think we need to talk." Thinking she just might know what was coming, Jo led the way back to the witness room where Yvonne and Cassie had spent the last four days waiting for their turn to go on the stand. When Jo had closed the door, she moved over to the window, pushing up the old wooden sash and digging for her cigarettes. "I thought we couldn't smoke in here," Yvonne said joining her. "Tough," Jo said succinctly. "Judging by the conversation I think we're about to have, nicotine is essential." "Precisely what did Lauren come out with in court today, that made everyone, including the judge, look at me oddly at lunchtime?" Yvonne asked as she lit a cigarette and blew the smoke out of the open window. "Lauren alluded to something when I first spoke to her a year ago, something that I didn't probe into too deeply, because it was entirely your business and I knew that if either of you thought it was important to Lauren's defence, you'd have told me. So, I wasn't expecting her to tell the story she did in court today." "Jo, you've got me really worried now," Yvonne said firmly. "Just tell me what she said." "Lauren told the court about the argument you had with Charlie when he started teaching Ritchie to shoot." Yvonne strove to keep her face as blank as possible, but Jo didn't miss the brief flash of pain and humiliation. "I wish she hadn't done that," Yvonne said eventually. "I know," Jo said gently. "And I know that if you'd had a choice about this, that you wouldn't have wanted anyone to know about that. But it really isn't a reflection on you or anything you did or didn't do." "Jesus," Said Yvonne in disgust. "You really are bloody naive at times. Have you got any idea how a jury will react to what Charlie did to me and the way he insisted on bringing up his children? They'll see that Lauren didn't have any alternative but to turn out like she has. Charlie insisted on bringing his children up in a culture of violence, and I couldn't do a bloody thing about it. About the only thing Lauren does have in her defence is that she had a rotten mother who totally failed to keep her on the straight and narrow." "Yvonne," Jo said, trying to calm her down. "You have done everything possible to help your daughter, and it is absolutely not your fault that she has ended up where she is." Tears were raining down Yvonne's cheeks by this time and she was having great difficulty in preventing herself from completely letting go. But on taking a breath to disagree with Jo, she was interrupted by the door quietly opening behind them. "Actually, I quite agree," John said quietly as he entered the room, having heard Jo's words as he approached. Both women turned to face him, combined looks of annoyance and irritation on their faces, telling him in no uncertain terms that they would both rather not have been disturbed. "Mrs. Atkins," John said, walking over to them, but Yvonne held up a hand. "Yvonne'll do," She said, trying to stem her flow of tears. "I don't especially like being reminded that I was once married to that bastard." "After what I heard in court today," John replied amiably. "I'm not surprised." "Why did you have to pursue that?" Yvonne asked, turning back to Jo. "Why did you have to let her say that to all and sundry?" "To give Jo credit," John put in before Jo could answer. "It was I who persisted in getting to the truth. Your daughter didn't want to tell the court about what your husband did to you. I think her words were, my mother wouldn't like me to tell that to a court. But I insisted." "Why?" Yvonne asked in quite a small voice. "Because the jury needed to know," John insisted gently. "But how can knowing what Charlie did whenever things didn't go his way help the jury to make their decision?" "It will help them to see why it was impossible for you to do more than you did to keep your children away from crime." "Yvonne," Jo suddenly said, remembering something from her conversation with Yvonne a year ago. "Do you remember what you said to me on the day you asked me to defend Lauren? You told me that once you marry someone like Charlie Atkins, you're in for life, and that the only way you get out is in a coffin." John winced. "Sounds like something I'd come out with," Yvonne said with a rueful smile. "I want you to tell that to the jury," Jo said quietly. "Now that, I can see the point of," Yvonne replied. "I just wish Lauren hadn't said what she did today, that's all." "It isn't your fault that Charlie Atkins treated you the way he did," John said firmly but gently. "I do hope that isn't pity I can see in your eyes, Judge," Yvonne said, unconsciously adopting the name Coope always gave him. "Not entirely," John said, thinking that it was more sympathy than pity but knowing she wouldn't like it. "Well, I don't want to see it," Yvonne said firmly. "I should have tried harder to stop Charlie raising his children the way he did, and I suppose the way both Ritchie and Lauren turned out is the result." "You cannot blame yourself for where your children have ended up," John insisted. "Oh, and you'd say that if it was your daughter in this mess, would you?" "George routinely blames my liberal attitude of bringing up our daughter for why she has occasionally taken the law in to her own hands, but I don't agree. We can only do our best for our children, no more, no less. What they do as a result is up to them, and if they end up on the wrong side of the law because of their actions, we do everything possible to help them, which is exactly what you've been doing ever since this happened." Yvonne was touched. She'd always known there was something different about this judge, ever since he'd been prepared to allow her to see her son on the day of his sentencing, and by the way he'd supported Karen both before and after Fenner's death. But here he was, talking to her about the highs and lows of parenting of all things. Laying a hand on Yvonne's shoulder, John briefly rubbed it, in an attempt to offer some sort of comfort for what she was going through. After a moment's silence, John fixed Jo with a mocking frown and said, "The thing that attracted me to your discussion, Mrs. Mills, was your clear disobedience of the no smoking rule which I know you are aware of in this building." "And as I said to Yvonne when she very kindly reminded me of it," Said Jo, also trying to lighten the communal mood. "Tough." "I'd like to see you say that to Lawrence James," John said with a laugh. "He's not one of those two pathetic little wankers who were in the gallery at Ritchie's trial, is he?" "A perfect description," John said with a smile. "though I really shouldn't be seen to be encouraging the use of such vocabulary when discussing the circuit administrator." When they left the witness room not long after, they met George and Karen in the foyer. "Are you all right?" Karen asked in concern. "I probably look about as well as you do," Yvonne said, taking in Karen's still pale expression. As Yvonne and Karen moved off together, clearly in search of a large scotch, the other three stood watching them. "Was Karen all right?" Jo asked. "She will be," Said George, wondering if her deeper involvement with Karen showed. Putting an arm around each of them, John said, "Can I have the pleasure of someone's company tonight? Preferably both of you?" "Forget it," Said George firmly, remembering the debacle of last night. "And I'm still not speaking to you after Tuesday," Jo said, though the little smile, combined with a wink that she gave George, told both of them she didn't really mean it. "You know," Said George in pretended disgust. "That's not the first time you've suggested having both our company at once." "It'd be fun," John said cajolingly. "Not a chance," Jo said firmly. "I'm not that way inclined." As they all walked out towards their cars, and Jo and John continued fondly bickering, George wondered what her blossoming fling with Karen would do to this three-way thing she had going with Jo and John. Above all, just how would Jo react to knowing that George definitely was that way inclined.