A Rush of Blood to the Head, a harry potter fanfic

Rush of Blood to the Head

Summary: One-shot Hr/D Song-Fic It all started with his mistake, and now he has to deal with the consequences

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, and the lyrics are credited to Coldplay

Flashback

Song lyrics

He wished it was a dream. But it was reality, and it was something that he had to deal with. But what exactly was he supposed to do? What did she want him to do?

Looking back on the situation, he realized it could have all been prevented. It was his fault, but could he fix it?

He was still in pain. It had been almost three weeks and he still felt the burn.

Looking down onto his forearm, Draco Malfoy pulled his black sweater further down towards his hand and pinned it between his fingers.

He felt ashamed. It was a feeling he had never imagined he would experience, especially towards something as honorary as this. But indeed, he felt ashamed, and it was all her fault. But he didn't blame it on her…he couldn't do that.

She was a woman who stood up for her beliefs, and that was why he loved her. She was a woman who didn't do what others wanted her to do, but what pleased her…and only her. Yes, he had learned that lesson once or twice. But that didn't mean she was a selfish person, she just knew what she wanted. And he loved her for that.

He should have told her when it happened. She and he both knew it was coming. But he had told her it was just another meeting. Just another Death Eater's meeting…nothing special.

But it had been special.

What was he afraid of? He had endured pain before…so much pain…but this was different. It was all so simple; he didn't want to feel broken. He was yet to endure the worst pain of all, and he knew that she could, in a split second, bring it upon him.

She wouldn't have been upset at him. She wouldn't have yelled, she wouldn't have screamed. He knew her well enough to know that she would have held him and shared his tears. But he had been afraid that her words would be bitter. Why had he thought it possible?

Love was blinding.

He said I'm gonna buy this place and burn it down
I'm gonna put it six feet underground
He said I'm gonna buy this place and watch it fall
Stand here beside me baby in the crumbling walls
Oh I'm gonna buy this place and start a fire
Stand here until I fill all your heart's desires
Because I'm gonna buy this place and see it burn
Do back the things it did to you in return

Ah, ah, ah Ah, ah, ah

A noise in the door way caused Draco to quickly advert his eyes towards the book in his lap that he had been previously ignoring; he didn't have to look up to know who it was. Pulling down his sleeve instinctually, he spoke casually, "Hey Granger."

As much as he tried, he still couldn't give up the incessant pet name for her.

"Hey…" Hermione said, walking quickly towards the stairs that led to her dorm, but Draco was too quick for her.

"You aren't getting away that easily…" He said as he stood up and walked towards her.

"Aren't you supposed to be at Quidditch practice?" Hermione asked. As long as they had been a couple, she had always been the same innocent bookworm; and that's why he loved her…

He loved the way she turned crimson when he called her "love", how she tried to pretend that she didn't enjoy his fingers stroking the back of her neck and how she still spoke nervously before they kissed. She was his first real love, and he was hers… She was still so young and naïve and that was why he loved her

"I skipped it," He said, taking her books and setting them on a table.

"…and the potions essay…?" she asked.

"Finished…" He lied, leaning in.

"…how about the…." She started, but was cut off by Draco's lips. It was a soft kiss and Hermione responded shyly. Draco's hand reached up towards her cheek and brushed her jawbone softly with his thumb as his lips massaged hers slowly, yet passionately. Unfortunately for Draco, Hermione pulled away and placed her hand on his chest. Hermione wasn't normally an insecure person, but Draco knew that not only love, but a relationship was new to her.

"I feel like such a bad kisser…" She said, looking away.

"No you're not." He answered truthfully. "Don't act so uncomfortable…loosen up Granger." He said as he leaned in again.

He said I'm gonna buy a gun and start a war
If you can tell me something worth fighting for
Oh and I'm gonna buy this place, that's what I said
Blame it upon a rush of blood to the head

"Me? Uncomfortable?" She pecked him on the cheek slightly to ignore his oncoming lips, "I should be asking what's up with you? You've been weird lately…skipping practices? Everything okay?"

"I'm fine," he said, reaching up to cup her face.

"Draco…" Hermione started, but stopped as she saw his arm rising to her face.

Honey, all the movements you're starting to make
See me crumble and fall on my face
And I know the mistakes that I made
See it all disappear without a trace
And they call as they beckon you on
They said start as you mean to go on
Start as you mean to go on

Draco cursed mentally as he realized his sleeve had slipped; and there it was. He began to pull away, but curious Hermione reached out and grabbed his arm too quickly.

The moment seemed to last for eternity. Hermione pulled his sleeve up swiftly to reveal the Dark Mark, encased in swollen flesh. "Draco…" She said. "When did this happen." She wasn't angry…she sounded hurt… and worried.

"A while back…" He started, but she stopped him.

"A while back? Draco, when did you get this?" She said fingering the mark ever so slightly.

"…about three weeks ago…" He said pulling his arm away and turning from her. He could see the look of disappointment on her face.

He said I'm gonna buy this place and see it go
Stand here beside my baby watch the orange glow
Some'll laugh and some just sit and cry
You just sit down there and you wonder why
So I'm gonna buy a gun and start a war
If you can tell me something worth fighting for
And I'm gonna buy this place, that's what I said

"...The deatheater's meeting...You didn't tell me?" She asked tentatively.

Blame it upon a rush of blood to the head

Draco knew that if he told her that he hadn't lied, but just never gotten around to telling her, she would believe him. But he couldn't leave it at that. "Hermione…" He started as he turned back around and grabbed her arm affectionately.

Oh to the head

"Why didn't you tell me? Draco?" She brushed away his arm, and he rolled his eyes before turning around once again and crossing his arms defiantly.

"DRACO!" her voice was more persistent.

"Okay! So maybe I lied! Maybe I conveniently forgot to tell you that I am now one of the Dark Lord's servants, it isn't possible that I was at all ashamed!" Draco spoke sarcastically as he spun around quickly to find her no more than a step behind him as he paced.

"Draco…don't give me that! I thought we talked about this! I thought we decided that you would tell me these things? We knew it would come----"

"Yes Hermione! WE KNEW it would come!" Draco's voice had raised and was now close to a yell, "And it did! But you know what! You aren't the one who has the mark! It was easy before it was on my bloody arm! But I'm stuck, and you're free! I'm BLOODY STUCK!"

"STOP YELLING!" She ironically yelled herself "I understand that this is hard for you…I may not know what it's like to have that commitment to the Dark Lord, but I thought that I could help you! I WANT TO HELP YOU! And I thought you cared enough about me to tell me these things! Apparently I was wrong."

She had used the guilt factor, and Draco felt himself beginning to crack.

"It bloody well is!" She shook in rage as he stepped towards her. His ploy obviously hadn't worked. "I tell you everything! And I thought you trusted me? Why did you lie? I don't understand why YOU LIED?"

Blame it upon a rush of blood to the head

Suddenly, Draco hit boiling point. He was trying to talk this over, but she obviously wasn't at the same point he was at. "I DON'T KNOW! HELL GRANGER! I SURE WISH I DID! I DO KNOW THAT I'M SORRY!"

Oh to the head

"BUT I CAN'T JUST TAKE THAT FOR AN ANSWER! You can't even tell me why you were wrong…" Draco continued to take deep breaths and sighs and she spoke, hoping to give the allusion that she was completely off track, the problem was, she wasn't…she was close to right... "You know what Malfoy?" she said, "I'm sick of listening to you, and I really want to believe you when you say you're sorry…but I CAN'T Malfoy! And you know why I can't! Because how do I know you are being honest? How do I know when you OBVIOUSLY haven't been in the past?"

"What's that supposed to mean!" He asked, growling slightly.

"Malfoy! You ARE A DEATHEATER! AND YOU DIDN'T TELL ME! ME…the ONE you confided in! I know you're fears Draco, you're hopes, you're dreams, and the Draco I know…the Draco I LOVE doesn't want to be one of Voldemort's servants!" He cringed slightly at the name she spoke so confidently and he secretly feared so deeply. Their eyes where locked for a moment, before he looked away in sheer discomfort. But his fear was replaced by anger, anger that she knew his weaknesses, anger that she was one of his weaknesses.

"I don't think this is about MY plans anymore Hermione," He stated boldly, "I think it's about yours!"

"What?" She yelled.

"I'm a Deatheater and suddenly you're perfect life had been put on hold!" Draco gave a sort of dumb look as if to say 'duh', but Hermione was not so easily swayed.

"Malfoy, you being a Deatheater is the least of my worries right now!"

"So you're saying you don't care that I'm a Deatheater?" He asked, twisting the situation.

"I BLOODY DO CARE!" She shouted.

"Oh…so you're saying you're ashamed…?" He said mockingly, "Are you ashamed Granger?" He asked, "Are you ashamed that your boyfriend is a Deatheater! Well I'll let you know I'm ashamed too!"

"I NEVER said that Draco Malfoy!" She yelled. "Unlike you, I look past the stereotypes that people make!" she said as she attempted to move past him, but he made a dart for her arm and grabbed it rather aggressively.

"OH! Stereotypes? So…you're saying that I JUDGE PEOPLE?"

"I bloody well am!" She said eyeing him with a passion equal to that of his.

Well Granger, if I'm such an awful, shallow person…" He pulled his face towards hers. "Than why am I standing her with my heart breaking because of a FILTHY MUDBLOOD!"

Honey, all the movements you're starting to make

It had just come out. He hadn't meant it. And he would have liked to think that she had provoked them. But the dreaded words he had thought to have forgotten spilled out and swarmed the room.

See me crumble and fall on my face

He saw tears prick in Hermione's eyes as the passion was replaced by a sickening look of pain and utter disappointment. Before even a second had passed, he felt a small, yet powerful hand collide with his face.

"Don't EVER call me that again Malfoy! Ever!" She yelled before turning to bolt, but again, he was too quick for her.

"Hermione…" He started softly as he stepped forward, but she stepped back in a movement that he hadn't seen in her since years before. A movement of fear.

And I know the mistakes that I made

"Malfoy, you've hurt me in more ways than one tonight. If you love me than you won't follow me."

See it all disappear without a trace

And he loved her so he didn't follow her.

Why had he lied? Granger had persisted the question periodically throughout the argument, and he was yet to answer it even within himself. Why had he so foolishly chosen to hide his destiny?

And they call as they beckon you on
They say start as you mean to go on
As you mean to go on, as you mean to go on

She wouldn't have left him.

She wouldn't have been angry.

He was afraid of being broken…from the love that he felt for her.

And love made him do crazy things.

And it had happened anyways.

So meet me by the bridge, meet me by the lane
When am I gonna see that pretty face again
Meet me on the road, meet me where I said

He had done everything he could to avoid being left in so much hurt and pain. And there he sat, heartbroken. Granger…his naïve love, the one he felt the world for…he had hurt her…and he really was sorry. The pain that he felt now was worse than the pain that his mark radiated through his body. And it couldn't be left behind. His pain was life itself, for his life had grown into love, and now that love was broken.

Blame it all upon
A rush of blood to the head

Now, lying in his bedroom, Draco realized with a sense of shame that fear had caused him to lie, and unrealistic fear. Reaching for a pen and paper, Draco jumped out of bed and scribbled a note furiously. He wasn't sure if it made sense, but love wasn't supposed too. And Hermione…she would understand.

Hermione Granger let the tears soak into her pillow as she wept silently. She didn't know why she was crying; Draco Malfoy wasn't worth crying over. But her love for him was. Rolling over in her bed, she felt something brush against her hand slightly. Picking it up, she immediately knew who it was from. Fresh tears pricked in her eyes as she opened it and silently read.

So meet me by the bridge, meet me by the lane
When am I gonna see that pretty face again
Meet me on the road, meet me where I said

Blame it all upon
A rush of blood to the head

Fin

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