Puff tissues © to… someone… definitions came from a dictionary...
Chapter Five
Kurotopi sighed as he gazed at the list of things Feitan had wanted him to buy. It just wasn't fair. Nope, not at all. Why should he be buying all this stiff with his own money, when Feitan is the one who wanted everything? Oh, yeah, because he was too nice for his own good, and Feitan was just… scary…
"Hmm… let's see…" he mumbled as he scanned the list. "Trevor Brown, bubble gum, blah blah blah… blue/green hair dye? Feitan dyes his hair? Hmm… umbrellas, rice cakes, toothpaste? What kind of list is this? A live bunny? Why would Feitan want one of those? Oh, last thing, finally. Uh… tempof… tampos…tanpots… tunpons… tantons… uh, I'll go ask someone." Kurotopi sighed again as he shook his head and headed in the door.
"Vegetable isle, meat isle, dairy products… Okay, here we are, the hair product isle stuff…" Kurotopi said to himself as he wandered into that area. Peering at the list, he crossed the aisle, looking for the color specified by Feitan, only to find that it didn't exist.
Then Kurotopi realized the little star next to the item. It read: not available in regular stores. Go to York Shin beauty parlor at the corner of twenty-third and fourth and ask the attendant behind the desk for the bathroom and then follow her into the back area of the store… blah blah blah, it basically told Kurotopi to knock out the attendant and then steal the product from the highest shelves, etc. but Kurotopi was not going to York Shin beauty parlor. No way, now how. Instead, he just took the blonde hair dye, threw it in the basket, went and got some blue/green paint, and he would just… conceal it! Yeah, great idea! Won't be pretty when Feitan wakes up one day and his hair is blonde… oh well!
"Okay, got everything, just need to get a bunny and a… uh… that thing," Kurotopi said as he crossed to the front of the store. No, of course Kurotopi wasn't going to pay! He's just going to ask that nice lady behind the counter what that thing was. Only the nice 'lady' behind the counter wasn't exactly a lady…
"...YOU!"
"Tampons… tampons… tampons…" Sharlnark muttered. He knew what it was, but it just wasn't coming. "Tampons… oh! Oh… Oh…"
"Oh, oh, oh! Shut up!" Phinx mocked as he turned his attention to the girls. "What the heck are tampons!"
Machi inhaled sharply as Shizuku scowled. If any guy had any common sense, he'd know to shut up and apologize for asking. However, none of the Spider really had much common sense of the normal people, so, uh, yeah…
"Hey, I think I've heard of that stuff before…" Franklin said absent-mindedly. "It like, it has something to do with puberty or something… heard it when I killed that health teacher two years back," Franklin told them. "But what's puberty?
Silence. However, everyone was thinking of something, no doubt.
Machi: . Oh, those boys are going over the line!
Shizuku: ;-; What's puberty again?
Phinx: Yeesh! What's with these people!
Franklin: …Uh, why did I kill that health teacher again…?
Sharlnark: Feitan, tampons… Feitan Tampons… Feitan's a girl? Nah! Can't be… Then…
Feitan: I wrote Puff tissues! Or was it tissues Puff…? Who can't read the word 'tissues'! And what are tampons! And tissues are in the isle with all that baby stuff, right? Who can't… etc.
"Can I… explain?" Sharlnark asked. The boys nodded. The girls did nothing. "Well, that's a yes then! But Feitan… tampons?"
"I wrote 'Puff tissues', but I think I wrote it reversed. Besides, they ARE in that isle, right?"
"No, and anyhow, puberty is the stage of adolescence in which an individual becomes physiologically capable of sexual reproduction. In case of females, the breasts start developing around this time, and menstruation begins. About every month, blood gather in the uterus to cushion the egg that's releases, just in case the egg is fertilized. However, if the egg is not fertilized, and that's usually the case, the blood flows out through the vagina and tampons or pads are use to catch the fluid! However, in the case of males, they-"
"Okay, that's enough info, Sharlnark!" Machi hollered, hoping up and giving him a hard whack on the head along with Shizuku.
"No, not enough!" Phinx grumbled. "I have no clue what you're talking about! Explain it bet-"
"Phinx, you… don't want to know, trust me," Feitan told him, shaking his head. Of course, he got everything. I mean, he IS the master of pain and torture, so yeah, of course he has to know this stuff.
"I'm still curious, even though I have no clue what Sharl's talking about…" Franklin admitted.
"Well, the point is," Sharlnark said, dodging the blows thrown by the girls. "Feitan's not-"
"A girl?"
"Kurotopi!" every exclaimed as Kurotopi bounded back into the warehouse...