Jell-O © to the guys who owns it, and same with Pocky.
Chapter written during times of dire need of sleep.
Chapter Six
"Where's my stuff?" asked Feitan immediately, anxious to get to most of them.
"Why did you ask me to buy tampons?" Kurotopi asked also.
"Where's my stuff?" Feitan repeated, slightly annoyed, embarrassed, and impatient at the whole situation.
"And hair dye, and a bunny?"
"Where's my stuff!"
"You dye your hair, Feitan?" Shizuku asked as if it were a normal question. Everyone awaited the answer also.
"I'm not the only one! How do you think my hair gets to greenish-blue?" Feitan inquired with a scowl. "And Machi's to purple and Kurotopi's to blue and Franklin's to green? We aren't just born with that color hair, you know," he finished as if it was the most natural answer in the world. But suppose it is though, I mean, I don't think people are just born with some crazy hair color, though it would be cool… ANYHOW!
"Oh…" went Shizuku, Phinx, and Sharlnark, the only ones there that supposedly didn't dye their hair. How they managed never to find one of those who did doing the dying in the bathroom must be an utter mystery…
Silence…
"My stuff?"
"Hey," Sharlnark interrupted suddenly, not to anyone's surprised for it was already expected sooner or later. "Why is this whole thing seemingly all focused on you? What about me? What about my explanation? What about-"
"You being quiet and stop eating candy. You're even more unpleasant when you're intoxicated with sugar," Machi sliced in, sighing at his stupidity.
More silence...
"Ahem… My stuff?" Feitan grunted, hoping someone would actually pay some attention to him.
"Oh, here," Kurotopi sighed as he tossed Feitan a shopping bag. Feitan immediately dug into its contents, not bothering to see what Kurotopi got, but straight to… ah… there it is… even though it shouldn't be…
"Hey, is that…" Franklin began, looking at the piece of paper Feitan was holding.
"A receipt?" Shizuku finished, twiddling her glasses as everyone gathered around.
"You actually paid for it? You know Feitan is obsessed with stealing and thieves and bandits and you go and pay for it!" Phinx questioned as Feitan narrowed his eyes (if they could even narrow even more…) and started pulling out objects that certainly wasn't what he asked for.
Everyone stared glued to the bag as Feitan pulled out even more random objects than the ones he asked for. First came the hair dye, purple, certainly not greenish-blue. Next came jumbo chocolate balls, jumbo chocolate balls deluxe, jumbo chocolate balls dark, jumbo chocolate balls white, jumbo chocolate balls strawberry, jumbo chocolate balls chocolate, and jumbo chocolate balls mint. After that came super jelly worms, jelly pops, jelly everything, and of course, Jell-o. Following that was Pocky, (a little cookie-stick covered with chocolate sauce, etc. It's one of the things that third examiner was eating) strawberry Pocky, chocolate Pocky, white Pocky, coconut Pocky, white coconut Pocky, chocolate orange Pocky, chocolate mousse Pocky, strawberry mousse Pocky, white mousse Pocky, almond crush Pocky, strawberry décor Pocky, chocolate décor Pocky, white décor Pocky, blah blah blah Pocky, the point is, there was a lot of Pocky. A LOT.
"Wow, and I thought Sharlnark had a sweet tooth…" Machi mused as she picked up each of the boxes ad examining them. "But I guess you have an even bigger one, Feitan."
"And he said he only bought twelve things… including tampons…" Phinx sighed, shaking his head. "What are tampons! You never did say, Sharl."
"Didn't I say that you don't want to know?" Feitan hissed, tossing aside the items. "And didn't you get anything I put on the list!"
"I must have taken the wrong bag!" Kurotopi retorted. "I met that purple-haired Zoaldyck kid and everything got in a jumble!"
"I want to know!"
"Gimme the Pocky!"
"Shizuku, what are tampons?"
"MY STUFF!"
"Go get your own stuff!"
"What time is it?"
"CHILDREN!"
Silence…
"This is stupid, just sitting here discussing a subject so closely related to that one!" Machi hollered, sitting back with a heavy sigh. These people really were children, even if a lot of them were older than her. Acting so immature…
"But I want to know!" Phinx retorted, not paying heed to Machi the least. "And I'm not going to be satisfied until I DO know!"
"But if you do know, you still won't be satisfied until you somehow get those dirty thoughts out of your head," Shizuku pointed out as Phinx started yanking at his hair.
"Grr!"
"Someone just tell us!" Franklin sighed, raising up his hands as if almost giving up. Machi wrinkled her nose in disapproval; Sharlnark was stuffing his face, Shizuku was cleaning her glasses with a 'boys are so stupid' look, Phinx was going to go bald soon if he didn't stop pulling, Kurotopi was slowly edging away from Feitan, and Feitan? He took the mistake of eating a jumbo chocolate ball deluxe and was now 'chocking' on the thing. Oh, poor chocolate ball… let's all take a moment to pity the thing… okay, that's enough…
"Can I?" Sharlnark begged, face covered with various smudges from all the chocolate he was eating in candy bliss.
Silence…
"Fine!" Machi huffed, Shizuku meekly nodding also. "But I'm getting a coffee," she finished as she got up, only to be pulled down by Phinx.
"No, you're staying here!" he scowled as Machi began tugging with no avail. Curse these people she must have thought then. The other's thoughts?
Machi: Stupid Phinx and his stupid grip and his stupid hairdo and his stupid voice and…
Shizuku: I feel excluded… everyone's so much older than me!
Sharlnark: I wonder if they have chocolate décor supreme Pocky…
Feitan: My hair-dye… My hair… My bunny… now what am I going to torture!
Kurotopi: Now we just slowly move away from Feitan… slowly… slowly…
Phinx: WHAT THE HECK ARE TAMPONS!
Franklin: This subject is getting old… we should be telling horror stories or something…
Silence…
"Anyhow!" Sharlnark began. "Everyone know what reproduction is?"
Everyone slowly nodded, signaling a 'yes', all except for poor Phinx and Franklin, the two who truly had no idea about the whole thing at all. They just sort of sat there with question marks exploding off of their heads.
"Uh… do you know what S-E-X is?" Sharlnark asked, slightly embarrassed that they, the Spider, where actually having such a conversation… except…
"Nope…" answered the two, shaking their heads. Talk about stupidity…
"Wait," Shizuku interrupted. "Phinx, you know what 'virginity' means, but not S-E-X?"
"So? A virgin is a guy who never went to a bed with a girl, and vice versa right?" Phinx said, clueless. Everyone just sort of looked at him like he was an idiot.
"Actually, a virgin is a person who never went through sexual intercourse," Sharlnark told Phinx, and Franklin too. Everyone else sort of stopped.
Silence…
"You said the word," Kurotopi mused. "You said the word…"
"Oh, come on!" Sharlnark grumbled. "You guys never took health class in school and watched 'the video' did you?"
"No," everyone answered, for they never went to school, except for Shizuku maybe, but she couldn't exactly remember any health classes…
"What's 'the video'?" Phinx questioned.
"What's S-E-X?" Franklin added. Everyone groaned.
"Um… how to explain…" Sharlnark sighed, shaking his head. This one was a toughie. One big blockhead, and one really big blockhead… "Uh, you guys do know where babies come from, right?"
"The store?" Phinx answered, shrugging. Pitiful…
"I thought it was the mom's stomach, or something liked that… I think I saw part of 'the video' Sharl's talking about…" Franklin mused, thinking back towards that health teacher he assassinated.
"Really? Not the store?" Phinx gasped, TOTALLY surprised as if it was the first time anyone had ever said that to him. "But that's stupid!"
"Actually, it isn't," Sharlnark continued on. "Do you ever see any 'baby stores'? No! They come from within the female, true, the uterus technically, where the male's sperm fertilizes the egg and-"
"Wait, we come from eggs?" Phinx asked, blinking wilding in confusion.
"No, the-"
"Drop the subject, please!" Machi begged, clasping together her hands. And squeezing her eyes shut. "This is too disturbing!"
"No, and the egg is a cell, you do know what a cell is, right?" Sharlnark explained, hopping that he would.
"Like the place Feitan puts his victims?"
"No! A cell is what makes up your body! You know, skin cells, bone cells, muscle cells, blah blah blah cells… get it?"
"…Huh?"
"Uh… why don't we… drop the subject?" Sharlnark suggested, Machi sighing with relief. "But if you really want to know, you can go rent 'the video'."
"So, now what do we do?" inquired Shizuku, again fiddling with her glasses.
Silence…
"Truth or dare!" and everyone groans…