Chapter Six
Chasing Phantoms
The next day Usha rose early. Walking out into the pre-dawn light she sat in the courtyard of the Decider's home. The dwellings here were much larger and more permanent than those on Selesia. But, given the temperate nature of Abanasinia this was not surprising as with the increased permanence came insulation against the oft harsh winters.
She blew into her bamboo flute which had been a gift from the Protector of Selesia.
"This flute was my predecessor's, Usha," he had said. "I have no use for it and he left it behind. Since yours was broken by the Dark Knights, take this one on your journey. Perhaps it can be of more use to you than it has to me."
Journey.
It seems like it had been all she had been doing since leaving Selesia. Her never ending sojourn across Ansalon and back again left her with very little to call her own, and no home except a room she rarely saw in the Tarsian Bardic College.
This time she actually played a short stanza into the flute, closing her eyes at the sound, allowing herself to not only hear the instrument from her home, but see it within. Almost unconsciously she began to play the tune that the Protector had taught her, filling in the words in her mind with his singing.
Like shackles on your feet
Like a halo in reverse
She brought herself out of the memory at the sound of the other song. Listening to the words, which were in elven, no less, she could hear Dalamar stop singing. Turning around, she spotted him sitting by the water garden.
"How long have you been there?" she asked.
"Long enough," he answered. "Judging by the subdued nature of your music, you came out here to muse on what was said yesterday."
"It... certainly gave me much to think about," she returned. "What was that you were singing."
He shrugged, "Nothing much, what I felt that song should have for words."
"You sing well," and she meant it.
Dalamar simply shrugged, lapsing into Silvanesti, "Hanno le."
"Man mathach?" asked Usha.
"I've been better," he answered, in Common, again with a noncommital shrug. "Since when do you even understand Silvanesti?"
"There is plenty you don't know about me, Dalamar," she answered back, equally as sharply. "So... where do we go from here?"
"We still have the mission," Dalamar reminded her. "But... somehow... I don't have the same urge to see my part in this to its end."
Usha lifted a brow in vague surprise. "What's this, Dalamar, regret? Remorse over what you have nearly done to someone you have never met?"
"I didn't though."
"But you nearly did, Dalamar," said Usha, standing up and stretching out a crick in her neck and back. "And you were willing to use that one innocent life to further your own plans."
"And again, I will remind you, I did not follow through."
"I know," sighed Usha. "I wonder at the same thing as the Decider; are you truly as Dark as you lead everyone to believe? Or were simply thrown out of Silvanesti in the same manner as Porthios and Alhana?"
Dalamar drew in a hissing gasp as Usha's point finally drove itself home. But, of course, Usha's own nature as a bard wouldn't leave it at that as she sung, in Silvanesti no less, a short tune that she had to have either thought up on the spot or had been thinking about for some time.
Or walk in Light
But never forget
From where you came.
Consider your home
Even if you cannot return
For if it stands
There is always still hope.
What is your Darkness?
Compared to that
Of those who cannot return
For there home is no more."
Dalamar sat very still, staring hard at the small water garden surrounded by the bamboo, and when he turned to Usha for daring to dig that deep into his personal life he found that she had already left him alone. "Dammit, I hate it when she does that," he muttered before getting up and stalking off to his own bedroom, sliding the rice panel shut with enough force that the delicate wood rattled the thick panels of paper.
Not that it took much, but even still, he noticed that thick winds usually didn't rattle them. Taking a deep breath he decided to think about why her little ditty did so much to rattle him.
First, it was dead on target. Dalamar decided then and there that if the Wizards thought that Bards were not a threat to them then they all really had no idea of what a true Bard was truly capable of. With a sigh he lay down on his bed and tried to go back to sleep as it was still before dawn.
Usha also retired back to her room, but she had a slight smile on her face. Dalamar needed the kick in the pants more than any in there party since Dezra began to realize that adventuring was not the romantic travels that other bards led her to believe. With that realization Dezra had suddenly understood what Caramon, her father, had tried teaching her and failed.
But from the very first day they met Usha had known that Dalamar had a tendency to help people at less than random moments– he just needed the push to understand why he himself did so. In the very least he needed a push to at least think about it.
She lay down and fell asleep with a single sigh.
The morning dawned bright and clear even if it was crisp with the cool of spring. Usha stood in the town center as the Decider stood on a step to her house and looked over the party. "Traveling here has answered many questions and asked many more. Perhaps in your travels you will discover the answer to these," the Decider gave a small bow, her back straight and only bending at the hip, as did the Protector.
Usha returned the bow before turning to face Dalamar and Dezra Majere. "It's time we went back to Mistress Meggin's."
Dalamar nodded, "Undoubtably she will be worried."
Usha walked to them, and then in between the gap that they stood. Looking at each one, she said as she continued to walk down the trail that would take them into the forest and away from the village, "There is other things we must do before heading to Tarsis. Dalamar, you haven't healed completely yet."
"I'm fine," he said, vaguely annoyed as they lost sight of the village, and the forest began to close in behind them as there was no trail to it.
"Let Meggin judge that," Dezra backed up Usha, and was pleased at Usha's warm smile of thanks for backing her up.
Dalamar only grunted in response as they continued, rolling his eyes as he made his opinion known. "There's no point in arguing," he said finally. "Nissi!"
Usha lifted her brows and shook her head, laughing. In vague confusion Dezra turned to Usha. "What'd he say?"
"Nothing that should be repeated in polite company."
"He swore?" Dezra's eyes widened, cataloguing the Silvanesti word away for later use.
"Only if you consider him exclaiming 'Women!' a swear," said Usha.
Snickering, Dezra shook her head, "I can't wait to see his face when Meggin starts traveling with us too."
"Nor can I, Dez, nor can I."
Traveling back through the forest took an uneventful day thanks to the Treant. Halfway through, and when the sun began to sink, Usha called it a day, "We are still hours away from Meggin's cottage."
"We can't continue?" asked Dezra.
Dalamar and Usha looked at each other knowingly. "We can because our eyes can see in low light, however, human eyes don't have that ability," answered Usha. "Even still, full dark will be upon us in a little under an hour and even we can't see in the dark. In the forest that would be hazardous and we can't afford to take the time to nurse a turned ankle."
Dalamar took care of a fire and Usha began to make a meal. A short time later the three ate in relative silence. Usha took the opportunity to write more in her journal while Dalamar studied his magic. Dezra, however, had little to do but play with the fire. Finally, when full dark had descended, Usha said, "Time for bed. I'll take first watch."
"I call third," said Dalamar. "It will give me time to study my spells in the morning before we have to leave."
"I guess that leaves me with second, huh?" Dezra said, a small smile on her face as she settled down to sleep.
Usha watched as the two settled down for sleep, their bedrolls nearly up to their ears. With a sigh, she leaned back against a tree and was surprised when a branch-like hand touched her shoulder. "How long have you been there?" she asked.
"Long enough. You could go to sleep too, Half-Irda, and I would watch your group," said the treant.
"No thank you, Uruvion," Usha looked up at the treant. "I have a question, why do you have an elven name while the rest have names that are Ent?"
Uruvion gave the Ent version of a shrug. "I don't really know. I just know that I have been called that from the time of being a very small sapling. How did the Irda name you 'the dawn'?"
"I have a feeling it had something to do with what I looked like at the time. They had never seen anyone with gold skin or white hair. I was... a bit of a freak... I guess."
"You are no freak, Usha," said Uruvion. "Different, yes. But we are all different in one way. Not one of us are alike. Does that make everyone a freak?"
"No," answered Usha as she blew into her flute once more to make a trilling, but yet soft note.
"How is your song coming along? I know the others would love to hear it."
"How long has your brethren been watching me?" asked Usha, turning to look up at the treant. "I never even knew you existed, let alone watched over me, until you saved me from the Shadow Wight."
"Oh... goodness... ah well..." Uruvion stammered and stalled at her forthright question. "You see... ever since you began to travel the road, mistress Usha. We could hear your flute on the wind, and could see the tips of your ears... and the coloration... we could tell you were, at least in part, Irda but yet not of the village to which we are neighbors. It was natural we would become curious, then the more we watched the more we realized you were a bard. The road was the one you traveled on a regular basis. You would play such pretty tunes, or sing, and we got to like hearing you, and would look forward to your appearances."
"And so when I ran under your bowers and was in danger you rushed to protect me," said Usha. "How did you know the Decider wanted to see me?"
"One of the elders told her about the bard they watched travel the road and asked if you were one of theirs," answered Uruvion. "The Decider was very surprised to hear that there was other Irda traveling openly as Irda, and without fear, and so asked that the next time you traveled past that you be brought before her."
"But I did more. I walked right into branch reach, right?"
"To be truthful, Usha, when you did not return like you always did we began to worry," said Uruvion. "The Decider had told us about how the humans would hunt you all down for being Irda– and responsible for the Chaos War– and so we thought you were dead."
"Okay, can you pass this along to your other brethren– humans, and elves, tend to get this funny idea that they're being stalked when watched from afar like that," said Usha, then she smiled. "But thanks for looking out for me anyway."
"Of course."
Usha sighed and then began to play the flute softly. It seemed, to her, like the forest held its breath as she did so. Perhaps it did. If Uruvion told the truth the other Treant liked her music. It was a song that she had been working for the better part of her career as a bard. It still wasn't finished and lacked any words. When she was finished, it was Dalamar who asked, "I've never heard that one before, and it was as sad, yet more... victorious... sounding than that in the Irda village."
"It's mine," she answered. "And it still isn't finished."
"It's still pretty," he said.
It was midday when they trudged through the snow and the ice to Meggin's door. Usha knocked and when the door opened, "Hurry and put your friend on the table and I'll be along... holy Paladine! It's you!"
"Hello, Meggin," said Usha. "Do we ever have something to tell you."
A few minutes later while their wet clothing and boots was hung to dry near the fire and they hid under the warmth of the blankets as Meggin served hot tea and biscuits, Usha asked, "How have you fared since our disappearance?"
"I was frightened out of my wits by that... thing... and when you failed to come back I thought you were all dead. But it never came after me so I assumed you took it down with you," answered Meggin. "I said to myself, 'Well, Meggin, your friends were killed protecting you. What now?' So I simply wandered around the house. You were gone for five days, what happened?"
"We nearly were killed," said Usha. "It was a neatly laid trap meant to capture me."
"But then what?" asked Meggin. "Where did you go?"
"We were... delayed in coming back," answered Usha with a slight smile. "I wish I could tell you more but doing so would break a sacred trust– but I can tell you that you have some very powerful, and good, neighbors."
"Very well," agreed Meggin. "We'll leave it at that. If that is the case, I don't want to know."
Dalamar said, "But it was educational all the same. More questions than answers, but now we have leads."
Meggin frowned deeply, "So... you're still set on this course of action?"
Dalamar nodded, but looked to the fire. "I am... but for different reasons than before. Finding Raistlin's daughter now means finding another Fragment, another possible wizard if she wants that kind of life."
Meggin looked from Usha to Dalamar and saw that a change had occurred in the five days, one that looked like it meant that something had come to light and they both would now have to come to terms with it. "The roads are still locked with snow, but clearing more and more each day."
Usha leaned back and closed her eyes, "We will leave once they have cleared more."
Dalamar turned back from the fire and got up to look out the window. Dezra watched both in concern while Meggin tried to figure out what exactly had happened to change the entire emotion within the group. She brought another cup of tea to Dezra and tried to pull her out of her silence. "So, Dezra, what do you think of the lands south of Thorbardin?"
"It's the same and yet so different," she said, her eyes still on Usha. "Mistress Meggin, can I ask something?"
"Of course you can," said Meggin. "Actually, there is something I want to ask."
"Well, Usha is... like a sister to me even if we had a rocky start, but now she's distant," Dezra chewed her bottom lip. "I get the feeling I've turned into a third wheel."
"Probably not," said Meggin. "I get the feeling that she's trying to understand something and that puts her out of sorts... speaking of which... without telling me the great big secret, what did happen out there?"
"Well, without telling anything I shouldn't, and can't, I can say that both Usha and Dalamar learned something of themselves that shocked them both," said Dezra, with a tiny half smile on her face, and she leaned closer. "They're cousins. Usha's father and Dalamar's mother are brother and sister; and both Irda as the common link."
Meggin sat back. That would explain the sudden change in the both of them. "Then let me tell you something, Dezra, you are not a third wheel. If I had learning that kind of news, I would be as out of sorts as Usha and Dalamar will be for the next little while. Perhaps being snowed in isn't such a bad thing. It will give them both the chance to sort it out– after all, it will be the only thing they will be able to do."
Dezra grinned, suddenly showing how young she was, "For awhile I thought they were falling in love with each other."
"There was that as well," admitted Meggin. "They have... much... talking to do. Not only does their relationship have to change now they have to decide if they even want one."
Meggin looked at the two, one napping and one brooding.
This would certainly make things interesting.
The song from the beginning of the chapter:
Halo
Depeche Mode
You wear guilt, Like shackles on your feet, Like a halo in reverse. I can feel, The discomfort, in your seat, And in your head it swirls. There's a pain, A famine your heart, An aching to be free. Can't you see, All of life's luxuries, Are here for you and me. When our worlds they fall apart, When the walls come tumbling in, Though we may deserve it, It will be worth it. Bring your chains, Your lips of tragedy, Fall into my arms. When our worlds they fall apart. When the walls come tumbling in, Though we may deserve it, It will be worth it.
And the translations from the chapter:
Man Mathach?
How are you feeling?
Hanno le.
Thank you.
Nissi!
Women!
Hey, I did promise to at least attempt Elven... if my elven stinks, at least I'm trying. The more I learn, the more I'll correct and come back and fix this so the Elven is in progress, unless, of course... it is accurate...
The song that Usha is playing is not Depeche Mode nor any Pop music, but actually original. Eventually, you will see that it's the ballad I posted a while back...