Disclaimer: I do not own Peacemaker Kurogane or Ruronin Kenshin.

M.Kasshoku: More Saitou-Tokio madness in this issue. Saitou's starting to lose his powers alright.

Sailor-Earth13: Glad you like the premature obituary. Nice to see how well liked Okita Souji is, even by his 'enemies'. Actually, Okita's still very much alive for now. Well, it will be highly unlikely one will be put up in the paper when he actually dies of his illness.

A raid on Umeya led by Saitou? SPOILERS for PMK vol 4 ahead! Do continue writing to Umeko for advice.

New Kyoto Post

Working for a Brighter Future!

Issue 19

NOTICE FROM THE EDITOR

Once more, we apologize for the delay in our latest issue. Our rented offices in the back rooms of a family restaurant were raided by some overzealous Miburou. The raid was led by Saitou Hajime of the Third Patrol. Several members of our staff were arrested, mostly women and children. Our printing press was speared by a big gorilla of a man known as Captain Harada during the raid. We needed to wait for the replacement to arrive from Nagasaki.

Due to business with our sister paper in the Satsuma region, the senior members of the editorial team, including me and Kogoro-san, were away at that time. We did NOT run away! It was pure chance we were out then. According to restaurant owner Umeko-san, Saitou was reported muttering something about Okita being too soft-hearted to see the true nature of his favorite dessert shop. He then attempted to arrest Umeko.

However, his attempt was thwarted by the timely arrival of a young female customer. The captain went pale and hastily ordered his men to leave the premises via the back door. Saitou couldn't be too happy when he discovers that the staff he arrested included the mothers and sisters of prominent bakufu figures. As we insist once more, we're not an anti-government paper!

- Chief Editor, Ikeda Koji

Flour Scandal Suspect Dead!

A local merchant was found dead with shuriken and kunai wounds in an alley. The said merchant was charged with selling moldy flour to Kyoto citizens. Kyoto has been plagued by food shortages since the revolt. The sale of sub-standard flour was believed to have caused numerous cases of food poisoning over the past year. He was released after investigations turned out nothing but lined the pockets of certain officials with bribes.

AOIYA RESTAURANT OPEN!

We at Aoiya Ramen Restaurant are open for business! The kami-damned rat who spoilt our ramen has been dealt with. Special half-price offers!

– Okina

NOTICE: No Assassination Attempt!

Contrary to rumors, the disturbance at my residence a few weeks ago was NOT an assassination attempt inspired by my anti-Tokugawa views. I fully support the Shogunate as it deserves! The racket was caused when I threw a small private house party for a few close friends. One of my guests got a tad drunk and persuaded a female guest onto the roof with him for a bit of fun and games.

Unfortunately, their games got too vigorous. As a result, the pair punched a hole through my roof. I assure you that the ruckus was not an assassination attempt. Both guests are good friends of mine.

- A certain bakufu official

Umeko's Kitchen:

I definitely prefer having Okita's patrol raiding my place. At least he doesn't try to Aku Soku Zan me or any of the waitresses. Thankfully, I manage to salvage some letters.

Dear Umeko-dono,

I am supposed to be the bodyguard of a well-respected man. However, he has assigned me to chaperon his sister! I am to keep her away from this other man. I try to carry out my duties but this woman keeps throwing kitchenware at me whenever I raise the issue. Also, she has me working in her kitchen and doing her laundry. I am a bodyguard, not a kitchen help!

- Samurai-Cook

Dear Samurai-san,

I will re-assign your duties. Do not worry about me. How about you protect the 'other man'? I just saw him running past with a patrol unit after him.

- Umeko

PS. Your tempura fish needs a little less salt. Keep up the good work, your cooking's nearly edible.

Dear Umeko,

I think my fiancé isn't serious about me! He's been postponing our wedding for so long that I lost count. My father still wants me to marry him for political reasons. Personally, I like him. I tried getting him to go to the kabuki theater with me. Actually, I'm more a Noi play enthusiast. I'm trying to cater to his tastes here. And he fobs me off with his colleagues! Otherwise, he stands me up! He's so darn hard to corner…and I'm considered an old maid by my peers! Help!

- Wolf's Bride

Dear Wolf's Bride,

Actually, it sounds as though you're enjoying the hunt. You have ample chances to ditch him. It's that hard-to-get thing, right? Try playing hard-to-get yourself. Let him know that he's not the only one for you. Use your feminine subtlety and wile. Drop by Umeya and buy him some gift cakes to melt his heart. I am more than willing to help you trap your wolf… (wink)

- Your sister-in-conspiracy, Umeko

Excuse me, I have some plotting to do with the aid of my WAJ sisters.

Personal Ad:

Sugar Plum, you misunderstood. The relationship between Blue-eyes and me is purely professional. Yes, I am aware of her past, but I'm employing her as my personal bodyguard because I believe she deserves a second chance, don't ya? Plus, they don't come any prettier to look at. I'm just a NICE GUY! Besides, you have five kunoichi bodyguards at your place, in addition to Red.

Reply to Ad: Care to explain how you and that blond bimbo came to be caught in a very compromising position at the residence of our mutual friend?

Advertisement

Need a building with pleasant surroundings and privacy for plotting- I mean education of our youth as to their future aspirations. Must have large grounds and reasonable built-in security features like squeaky floorboards and secret rooms.

Contact Itou K. c/o Aizu Post Office, P.O. Box 5

Personal Ad:

H. Meeting at the usual place by the river outside. Further details can be found at Umeya, same place. Bring that Dragon-Horse, preferably bound and gagged so he does not get the wolves onto us.

- K. K.

Obituary for a former YMSA man

Nice try at trying to get into my good books. Thing is, Umeya's food and service suppresses that of Aoiya without the need for low-down, dirty tricks. Even if the waitresses at Aoiya didn't get you, I'd have sent Nami to have a few words with you. Brother dear, don't you have the slightest control over your men?

Paid Ad: Notice

Can the unknown person who's been sending my Souji those get-well cakes please desist! Souji must cut down on his sugar intake for health reasons, my health reasons. Boy gets too hyper and keeps me up all night… I'm also very interested to know how the hell you get past our guards and into Souji's room to leave your gifts. Contact H.T. at Shinsengumi offices.

(There! I've placed an ad in this rag. What? Those flipping bakufu officers want us to officially and publicly apologize for manhandling their womenfolk as well? Curses!)

Arigato note:

Thanks for the gifts, Hotaru or Kenni. Whoever it is, it was real sweet of you. Thank you also for washing that bloodied uniform I left in my room and mending that torn sleeve on my haori. - Sou

Author's notes:

Now Umeko has a reason to help Tokio. SPOILERS! Sara is Ryouma's bodyguard.

Dragon-horse refers to the kanji for Ryouma's name, I think. Anyhow, the dragon horse sculpture was symbolic of expanding horizons in Chinese history because it was closely linked to the expansion of China's Silk Route. The horse is shown soaring through the clouds with the birds. In the sculptor's attempt at mischief, three of the animal's hooves are airborne while the last is perched on the back of a swallow… oops, I'm reading a book on Chinese sculpture on the side here. Anyhow, I think this code-name is very apt for Ryouma.

Cruel and unusual punishment? Hijikata has to put an ad in the paper and apologize? Kondo's out of town with Itou and Susumu. They will not be back till spring. Someone has been sneaking cakes to Souji… I don't think it is Kenni sneaking into the wolf pen.

About Noi and Kabuki theaters, Noi was the thearter of the upper-class, such as the Takagis. Kabuki was more geared towards the masses.