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Chapter 14

Nick paced nervously outside the bathroom door. He wanted to give her enough time to compose herself but at the same time he didn't want to give her time to think of another reason to push him away.

Sealing his nerves he knocked gently on the door and called her name. She did not respond. "Sara please we need to talk." Nick said imploringly. He waited. After a minute or so the door opened slowly.

Sara's eyes were red and her lovely face was streaked with tears. "There's nothing to talk about. There is no us. It was a bad idea. So let's just forget about it," she said flatly.

He looked at her for a long moment and could see that she was lying. Without warning he zoomed in and captured her mouth with his. He quickly took control of the kiss and filled it with all the passion and desire he felt for her.

At first he thought she was going to fight him but soon he felt her responding. Her hands found there way into his hair and she pulled him up tight against her body. Their lips and tongues clashed against one another heatedly in a battle of wills.

Finally Sara gave up her fight and surrendered to him. He groaned hotly when he felt her succumb to him. His mouth left hers and journeyed seductively to her neck. She moaned at the ardent sensation his mouth was making her feel. When he reached her ear he whispered, "You're a terrible liar you know."

"I know," she answered hotly as she began to nibble her way up his neck. He knew it would be too easy to let them selves get carried away, so he gently grasped her arm and stepped away from her.

Her eyes flared briefly with anger at him for stopping yet again. "I have to tell you something and I need you to listen, Okay?" He watched her struggle for control. She nodded her head in agreement but the pout remained on her face.

Nick took her hand and led her to the bed. "Let's sit." he said gently. She sat and tried to scoot away from him but he refused to let her. He grabbed her hand and held it tightly in his. He looked in hers eyes and said softly, "I'm not mad at you for trying to push me away. I understand why you're doing it." She humphed slightly and shook her head. "Sara please give me a chance." She sighed when she saw the sincerity in his eyes. "I'm sorry," she answered.

"I know you think you can't give me what I need. That in some way you think you're broken." She started to protest but he squeezed her hand to silence her.

"But you're wrong Sara, so very wrong. I understand your pain and your fears and why you feel the need to push me away. You feel like a piece of yourself was violently taken away, and night after night you pray that the missing piece will come back to you. But you know deep down inside that it's not ever coming back. And that thought terrifies you. Because you have to finally come to terms with what was taken from you, your innocence and your ability to completely trust another human being. You feel broken and not complete. And you wonder how am I ever going to have a real relationship. How can it work when I not a whole human being? But most importantly how can that person begin to understand the pain and the guilt that I've lived with for so many years. Because regardless of what the experts say those feelings do not go away, they're always there and somehow they've become a part of us."

He paused for a moment watching her eyes fill with confusion at his words. He knew what she was thinking, 'How does he know?' He squeezed her hand gently and continued, "It doesn't make you a broken person Sara, it only makes you that much stronger. It's scary to reach out to another person and open yourself up. You're afraid to trust them with your heart. But I am ready to take the chance with you Sara. I've spent too many years running and being afraid. I'm ready to trust you with my heart. I just hope in time you can learn to trust me with yours. To me you're not broken. You're the strongest woman I've ever met and I care about you. I want you, ALL of you."

He finished and looked deeply into her eyes. He watched emotion after emotion pass through her eyes: confusion, disbelief, realization and finally acceptance.

"When?" she whispered. "When I was nine, a last minute babysitter." He said without emotion. Her eyes widen in shock and she brought her hand up to cover her mouth. "You were so young," she breathed. He nodded his head. "What happened?" she asked. "Nothing, like you I was to afraid. I was terrified to tell my parents. I was scared they wouldn't love me anymore."

"Oh Nick," she whispered, holding his hand tighter. "Years later I found out she was killed in a drunk driving accident. It helped a little to know she was finally gone. But it was far from any kind of closure."

Sara nodded in agreement. She gazed at him for a moment realizing that she had pegged him all wrong. Through the years she had gotten to know him quite well and she could see what a kind and caring man he was but she also assigned him negative qualities too, like being a womanizer and a frat boy party jock.

Sara's eyes filled with tears when she thought back to the harsh words she had said to him and the awful reputation she had assumed he had. But he had been just like her: terrified and not knowing how to handle it.

"Sara," Nick said gently bringing his hand up to wipe at her tears. "The way I treated you sometimes and the things I assumed. I'm so sorry Nick." "It's alright Darlin' there was no way for you to know." "But I can see it now. All those cases that involved abused kids. I can remember the pain on your face. God Nick!"

"Those cases are always hard on me but I see a counselor on and off when it gets to be too much. It has definitely helped me." Nick answered. Sara brought her hand up and covered his on her cheek. She stroked it affectionately and softly said, "I'm sorry that it happened to you."

Nick's eyes softened at her words and he said, "And I'm sorry that it happened to you." She gave him a sad smile and leaned in to kiss him gently on the lips. As the kiss ended they rested the foreheads against one another, closing their weary eyes. "What are we going to do?" she asked softly.

"First we're going to sleep. I don't know about you but I'm exhausted. Then tomorrow we're going to catch this bastard. After that I'm going to take you on a real date, after which I intend to make love to you for as long as I physically can." He could feel her face light up into a smile.

"I don't know if I can wait that long Nick," she said teasingly. He leaned back and looked into her eyes and said, "But I'm going to be soooo worth the wait." He gave her a playful smirk and jumped off the bed before she could retaliate. "Oh you think so Stokes?" "Oh I know so Sidle."

Sara gave him a smirk before grabbing her stuff to head into the bathroom. She turned and said with a grin, "That couch is still sounding like a good place for you to sleep." With that said she shut the bathroom door.

Nick chuckled to himself before divesting himself of his clothes. He climbed into bed in just his boxers. He sighed contently and snuggled under the blankets. His eye popped open when he heard the bathroom door open. Upon seeing her sleeping attire or lack there of, both eyes flew open. "What the hell are you wearing?' he groaned bolting up in bed.

Sara smiled sweetly and looked down at the semi see through red teddy she had on. She ran her hands seductively down her body and Nick groaned again when he noticed the little red lacy panties she had on underneath. "What? This?" she asked innocently. "You bought that at Wal-Mart?" he asked in disbelieve. "Yeah, not to bad huh? Almost as good as Victoria's Secret." Nick groaned again.

Sara headed for the bed and Nick practically whined, "You're not wearing that to bed are you?" "If you don't like it I can just take it off," she said slyly as she began to slide the straps from her shoulders. Nick's eyes flared with lust as he tried to form a coherent word. "God Sara," was all he could moan.

She took pity on him and laughed softly as she climbed up and straddled his waist. "Not helping," Nick gasped. She gave him a pleased smile and said, "I'm sorry. I got this in hopes that something would happen tonight." He raised his eyebrows in surprise and tried desperately to keep his eyes on her face. He thanked God there was a sheet and blanket between their bodies because if he could actually feel her skin he would be a goner.

Sara brought her hands down on either side of his face and leaned slowly down. Nick lost the battle and his eyes zoomed in on her breasts that were snuggly held in the sheer material. There was nothing left to his imagination. He moaned at the beautiful sight of her. He looked back up at her with defeat in his eyes.

Getting the desired affect she wanted, she climbed off of him. Nick's eyes widened in shock and he rolled over to look at her. "What are you doing?" he asked disgruntled. "Going to sleep," she replied. "What!?" Nick yelled. "You said you were exhausted," she stated in a matter of fact voice. "What? No! I mean I was but now I'm awake, wide awake." Nick muttered.

"I've been thinking, Nick, about what you said, and I would have to agree." Sara said with a sly grin. "About what?" Nick asked guardedly. "That you'd be worth the wait," she answered with a smirk. Nick's eyes widened and he flopped back on the bed grumbling, "You are such a tease woman. Just remember payback's a bitch." She laughed gleefully, rolled over and gave him a kiss on the cheek. "I'm really sorry Nick but I couldn't resist. I just needed to know that you want me as much as I want you. I'm sorry."

"God Sara you have no idea how bad I want you and after seeing you in this outfit, that want just quadrupled." Nick sighed, covering his face with his hand. "Nick," she whispered pulling his hand away. He turned his head and looked over at her. All her playfulness had left her. Her eyes were somber and her face serious.

"What's the matter Darlin'?" Nick asked softly. She reached over and lovingly stroked his cheek. "Thank you for opening up and being honest with me. I know it had to be difficult. But it means more to me then you'll ever know." He smiled at her heartfelt words. "You were the brave one Sara. I just followed your lead. I've wanted to tell you for a long time but I didn't know how. After you shared your secret I knew you would understand." She nodded her head and snuggled up close to him laying her head in the crook of his good arm. Their faces were inches apart, their hot breath caressing each other's faces. He watched as tears slowly filled her eyes. "Sara, honey, what's wrong?"

"That's it Nick. For the first time in forever nothing's wrong. Well unless you count a maniac stalking me," she said with a little laugh. Nick rolled his eyes and waited for her to continue. "Nick, the weights gone. The heavy burden of my secret doesn't seem so all-consuming now. I feel like I can breathe again. That maybe I can be truly happy. And it's because of you." She said quietly as a tear slid gently down her face.

Nick could feel his own eyes filling at her words. He knew her well enough to know that it took a lot for her to confess something like that to him. This was a huge step for her. "Sara honey I feel the same way. You've given me so much. You've filled that empty place in me." "Nick," she breathed. "Sara I…"

She quickly brought her finger up to his lips silencing his words. "Please Nick. I…" she faltered as her eyes begged him to understand. He gave her a gentle smile, leaned over and kissed her soundly on the lips. "I know you're not ready Sara but I just want you to know I'm here for the long run and I'm not going to let you push me away if the going gets tough. Okay?" Nick said with resolve.

Sara nodded her head slowly and gave him a small smile. "Good," he said, "Now let's get some sleep. I'm looking forward to a fabulous room serviced meal in the morning, paid for by the city of Vegas." Sara laughed and nestled in closer to Nick. "Thank you, Nick." "Goodnight Sara." He said kissing her forehead.

They both drifted off to sleep quickly, securely locked together in each other's arms. Their dreams were only of each other and their growing love.

In the early predawn hour while Nick and Sara slept peacefully, a madman stood cross the street watching and waiting. Clutched in his hand was a CSI id badge with a picture and a name. Sara Sidle. He stared at the picture for a moment before looking back up at the hotel. "Soon Sara, very soon." A deep, maniacal voice whispered.

As the temperature began to slowly rise outside the need to have Sara began to smolder deep inside the madman. He didn't know how much longer he could wait to touch her again. His need was growing stronger and stronger. Maybe it was time to find another girl, someone to ease his ache. The sun broke its way over the horizon and the man smiled. It was going to be a killer of a day.

TBC