Crash and Burn - Omake Epilogue #3

By: Clever Audrey

Disclaimer: Not mine. Not making any . No problem.

Warnings: BAD PUN. Sasuke being naughty/suggestive. Implied NaruSasu - though if you've made it this far, you probably don't need the shounen-ai warning anymore, ne?

In which Shikamaru receives more information than he wants

Sasuke scowled.

This party is boring, he thought. Naruto was sitting further down the table drinking and talking the ears off of Gaara, Neji and Kiba, leaving his dark-haired lover stuck losing a game of shougi to Shikamaru.

Sasuke understood that Naruto wasn't ignoring him on purpose, but that didn't get rid of his jealousy. He sighed and scowled even more down at the game board.

Shikamaru rolled his eyes. "You know, Uchiha, you'd have a lot more fun in life if you'd just get that stick out of your ass."

Sasuke began to glare more at the jounin, but stopped halfway through and smirked instead. "And what if I like having a…stick…up my ass?"

Naruto spit out his sake.

It would have sprayed all over Gaara, except for the thin wall of sand that rose up to protect him, so he just sat calmly and watched his loud friend now rolling around on the floor, howling with laughter.

Shikamaru groaned and clutched his head. "I did not want to know that, Uchiha!"

Sasuke just continued to smirk. "I know."

Finally, Naruto calmed down enough to get up off the floor. Still smirking, Sasuke left off his game with Shikamaru to collect his lover and take him home. Shikamaru barely noticed them leave, even though everyone else was still trying to figure out what the hell had just happened.

The laziest jounin in Konoha ignored all attempts to get him to explain the joke in favor of following up his train of thought: That was WAY to much information…though I certainly didn't expect that Sasuke was the one getting nailed…wonder how I can use that…hmm…doesn't Kiba have a video camera?

All requests for information fell silent at the wicked-looking smirk that was creeping onto Shikamaru's face, and the others started backing away slowly.

Hehehe…this could be soooo much fun…Shikamaru left shortly thereafter, his tactical genius being studiously applied to the problem of how best to blackmail Uchiha Sasuke.

Owari

AN: hehehe. Me and my dirty mind must take all blame for this one. And, as a side note, our "uke in Sasuke" jokes are just those; we know his name is pronounced "Sas'ke." Just more bad puns. ;D