Chapter 28: The three new students

It was time for the first day of the children's math class and they all where excited to see what Celeborn had to offer, or so Celeborn thought, they really wanted to see his reaction when he found out what Elladan and Elrohir had done.

"Alright now class, I am Lord Celeborn-

"Hi daddy!"

"Hello Celebrian… Now, back to business-

"Hi grandpa!"

"Hello Elladan, Elrohir and Arwen… Now, getting back to what I was saying, there are two new students in our class. Please welcome Tom, Goldberry and Fred."

A fat boy, the children figured was Tom, entered eating a chocolate bar.

"That's Tom." Celeborn said. When the fat boy, Tom, Tom Bombadil, sat down (he took up two chairs and three desks), a fair little girl, it had to be Goldberry (no one thought it could be Fred, that's for sure) entered. She waved and giggled then took a seat beside Tom. He gave her a piece of his chocolate bar.

"Fred? Where are you?" Celeborn looked around for the boy named Fred.

"I'm here sir!" came a voice from an empty chair.

"Fred? You're a… chair?" Celeborn asked.

"No! I'm a hobbit, sir!"

"Oh wait I have a note from your mother… Invisible problems… Oh well why didn't you tell me you where invisible? Well, anyways class, that is Fred the invisible hobbit!"

Fred waved, but no-one saw. But what people did see was that Merry, Pippin and Mini Nazgul (Mackenzie) where missing (they lost track of time, having such fun at Merry's house they where still there).

"Now, as you all should know from your schedule, I am your math teacher. We will be starting with counting, since some of you may not know that." Celeborn said, drawing three distorted circles on the chalk board.

"Now, how many circles are there on the board?"

"But those aren't circles, those are not round!" Boromir whined.

"Raise your hand to speak." Celeborn said.

"But I don't have to!" Boromir said, now getting angry.

"Any why do you think that?" Celeborn asked. Oh how Celeborn whished that he was still allowed to use his belt, but no, that was only legal in Mordor.

"Because daddy says I am special."

Celeborn sighed.

"So anyways, how many circles are there?" Celeborn asked. Boromir raised his hand.

"not round!" Boromir whined.

"Raise your hand to speak." Celeborn said.

"But I don't have to!" Boromir said, now getting angry.

"And why do you think that?" Celeborn asked. Oh how Celeborn whished that he was still allowed to use his belt, but no, that was only legal in Mordor.

"Because daddy says I am special."

Celeborn sighed.

"So anyways, how many circles are there?" Celeborn asked. Boromir raised his hand.

"Yes Boromir?"

"None, because they aren't circles!" Boromir sniggered.

"That's it Boromir, go to the principal- uh, Erestor's office, since Principal Glorfindel is hurt." Celeborn ordered.

"I cant."

"And why not?"

"Because I already went there this week." Boromir whined.

"Well that's too bad now isn't is? Get moving!" Celeborn ordered again, now furious with the little Gondorian rebel.

Boromir angrily huffed some unintelligible words as he left the class.

"Stupid… Ugly… daddy nicer… Smelly… Teacher… Elf… Bad… Mean… Ring… Smelly… Snot… Lemons…" Boromir grumbled as he opened the door to Erestor's office.

Boromir had always thought that elves where strange, but this made him think that they where more than strange.

Now he thought they where queer.

You see, queer is a big word for little boys like Boromir so being queer is like the best way you can say that the elf is gay and weird at the same time.

"What are you doing Erestor?" Boromir asked.

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"Fred, I can't see you. How can I be your partner?" Poor Radagast was just too confused. He wanted to be Fred's partner, but even the fact that he was a wizard did not change the fact that Fred was invisible.

"I'm sitting on my chair. Now I am picking up the pencil-

"ARG! FLYING PENCIL! WITCHCRAFT! BURN HIM! BURN HIM!" Radagast ran around the room screaming.

"…And they promised me 'No metal students this year'…" Celeborn muttered as he –tried- to do some work. And he had a lot of that to do, since that robot he had bought from Well-Mart had broken down.

"Stupid Well-Mart robot. I knew I should have gone to wall-mart." Celeborn muttered as he saw some oil splotches on his desk, left there by the cheap robot he had gotten.

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Erestor had been Illiendal's teacher, but since he had to replace Glorfindel, there was a replacement, and everyone in Illiendal's class, including Sauron , hated the sub. Sauron had even said:

"When I grow up I'm going to imprison this substitute and make him do my homework."

Mister Fingolfin was never the substitute you wanted to get, only because he had a cursed brother. Everyone hated him for that, and he was actually a really nice teacher. He gave lollipops to everyone! Everyone!

"Now class, turn to the 789th page of your workbooks and do the work. It is all fairly easy, concerning Glorfindel's fight with the balrog. If you need help, I will be at the desk in front." Fingolfin said as he sat down.

"Fingolfin… What a long, strange name." Sauron muttered to himself. Illiendal, the poor student forced to sit next to him, rolled her eyes.

"As if Sauron is not a strange name."

"Are you insulting I? The great Sauron, the soon-to-be forger of the ruling rings? Are you insulting the greatest kitchen appliance of all time? Are you… Busy tonight?"

"Yes."

"Oh really? Well wait until I forge a pretty ring, then I can read your mind and know if you are really busy tonight!" Sauron laughed manically. He really was a nice guy, just like Darth Vader, but everyone has that little evil inside of them (so be careful not to water the little evil or it grows bigger).

Illiendal sighed and looked to her other side. Sernaer was focused on his work, looking very thoughtful. But then she noticed that it was not the 789th page of his workbook that he was working on; his book was opened but he was reading a note he had in his hands.

Illiendal peered over his shoulder; he was too concentrated to notice. She saw whom it was from: The bratty girl who sat near the teacher's desk… Luthien.

Ever since Beren had been expelled for unknown reasons Luthien was after handsome elves. And Sernaer seemed to be her newest victim… Victim, since every elf she had wanted to date 'suddenly' got expelled.

Illiendal saw how happy Sernaer seemed to be to have received this letter so she his him in the back of his head.

"Ow!" Sernaer rubbed his head. Fingolfin looked up from his papers.

"Illiendal?" Fingolfin arched an eyebrow.

"Sorry sir."

"Principal's office." Fingolfin said. Illiendal shot Sernaer a glare that made him instantly crumple the letter and throw it out, then get back to his work.

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When Illiendal arrived at the principal's office – where Erestor was – Boromir still stood there, with gaping eyes, looking at the site in front of him. Illiendal joined the young boy in staring at Erestor…

To be continued…

Oh, what is Erestor up to? I know what. This is only rated… Uh… Pg-13, right? It can't be something too nasty now can it? I'm ending all response to reviews with Merry Christmas!

Gods-girl2004: Aw, that's all right… GO BACK AND REVIEW THAT CHAPTER YOU MISSED! Just kidding… Well, it wound be nice. But don't if you don't want to. I liked Fred, he is my bestest friend! Merry Christmas.

Haldir's Heart and Soul: Magical tattoos! Um… yea… What do you mean by that? Merry Christmas!

Mesozoic Flower: Merry-ish, what a wonderful word! Merry-ish Christmas!

Matrixelf: Well, Radagast was already mentioned that he was a student, but Tom and Goldberry never came! Welcome to school and thanks for the ideas! Merry Christmas!

Mistopurr: Well, it's December 14, 2004 here. And it's out today, for us. Poor us in Canada, it's out so later than it is in the rest of the world. Merry Christmas!

Here comes the hockey puck: Cactus?! Merry Christmas to your cactus!

Surf all day and do the hula: this chapter was sort of… Random. Merry Christmas!

Rainbow fish: Writer's block is sometimes fun, especially when it goes away. So are turtles! Merry Christmas.

Bberry06: Glad you like it.