.hack//SOUL -- .hack//Destination of a Soul

Disclaimer: I do not own .hack//SIGN or any of the characters in the anime series. This is just a fan fic based AFTER the series, that's all.

Again, thank you for your comments. Sorry that it took so long for chapter 2 to come up, I have gotten A LOT of work in school lately and I'm in a special program where I must work hard on. But even though the waiting for chapters will be long, I won't give up on this fic. I have many ideas that must be put in. I recently watched Final Fantasy: The Spirits Within and got quite fascinated with it. If I had to choose a song that would best relate to this fic, it would be the song The Dream Within from that movie. Anyways, here's chapter 2. Sorry if it's a bit freaky, but I can trust you that it will get freakier as the story goes on… so… umm… brace yourself. I'm putting the story rating to PG13 now because of… what I just said. ^^; Please comment afterwards. =)

Chapter 2 – Reflection

Without another thought, I closed my eyes and felt a breeze pick up from beneath me. I opened my eyes. What I saw almost made me scream. It was a sight too unbelievable for me to even imagine.

I was back at Aura's domain. It would have been the same as before except for one thing. Everything… the trees… the bed… the ground… was covered in blood. Was it blood? It looked a lot like it…

I crouched down and placed three fingers on the ground. I picked up my hand and looked at it. I used my thumb to feel the red substance. It felt like blood too… very thick… very deep…

This was the moment where I was scared like never before. What was all this blood doing here…? What happened…?

I looked around in search for Aura. There was no one there. I walked towards the bed. It was the soft bed that seemed to have the most blood on it. There was practically a tub full of it. I couldn't bear looking at it. The blood was pouring from the sides, making surrounding puddles.

My shoes were getting soaked. I didn't want to be in this place one second longer… but I had to find out what happened.

I stood beside the bed. Looking at it a bit closer, I saw there wasn't much blood on the pillow. I lifted it up slightly. Surprisingly, there seemed to be something under it. It looked like a piece of paper. I picked it up. The paper had writing on it. To my disgust, it was written in blood. It read one simple word:

S.O.U.L.

Every letter seemed to have a dot or period at the end of it. Although I knew the meaning of the word, the letter did not make any sense. Perhaps I truly did not know the word. Wasn't a soul a part inside of you which releases the feelings you feel? Maybe it was more than that...

The whole thought of this gave a chill down my spine, which did not disappear. Although I didn't fully understand it, I knew something was definitely wrong. I had to find the others…

In an instant, the words on the paper began to disappear. After all the blood vanished, there was only the thin paper in my hand. I stood in utter confusion. What is going on? I asked myself. I let my body stand there, feeling the blood now touching the skin of my feet. Nothing made sense… nothing…

Then I heard a voice.

I knew you would come back… I knew you needed me…

"What?" I said in a loud tone. I looked all around me. There was no figure that I could see.

I took a few steps back, and tripped. I felt my back push against the ground… the blood splattering in all directions… covering every part of me…

I have to get out of here… I have to leave this place… I said to myself countless times.

I pushed my body up with my staff and lifted it as high as I could. I kept telling it, get me out of here, get me out of here, but no matter how much I said it the staff did nothing. I was stuck here, blood staining through my clothes, I could not escape…

I heard the voice again.

You cannot escape. You will stay here forever… with me…

I was breathing extremely hard. My eyes were wide open and my body was getting weak. With all the strength I could summon, I shot my staff right deep into the soil, past the blood and digging into the dirt. With one deep breath, I screamed.

"LEAVE ME ALONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Everything was silent. I could not feel my staff. I could not feel my body. I opened my eyes, but there was nothing but darkness. I felt as if I was dead… yes… I could feel death…

Then, a long 'A' note echoed through the boundless walls of time. It woke me up and I was able to feel my body once more. I sharp beam of light pearced my eyes in front of me. I squinted as I looked at the familiar figure that was appearing before me…

Aura…

It was Aura without a doubt. She did not change at all. Her long, light hair reached down to her feet and her innocent eyes glanced at me with such sweet emotion. She walked to me.

"Aura… you're…" I couldn't find the right words to say. Before I could say anything else, I noticed that small tears were forming from her eyes. They quickly ran down her rosy cheeks and they didn't seem to halt. She stopped dead in her tracks. I ran up to her.

"Why are you crying?" I finally asked. She gave to answer. She just looked up at me with her heavenly eyes, which were filled with water.

I looked down to the ground. As far as I knew there wasn't really a ground though, since the surface was the same colour as everything around us… black. There had to be some sort of ground… since my feet were feeling some sort of cover beneath them. I looked at Aura's bare feet. I could see the small tears falling to the surface. But… something was strange. Every time a drop of her tears hit the ground, the surface where it dropped turned red, and than black again. This kept happening every time a drop fell. All this time, Aura was staring at me, not saying a word.

Instead of thinking about the ground, I crouched down so my head was leveled with hers. I spoke again, hoping to hear her voice. "What is wrong? Are you hurt?"

There was a long silence, and she finally began to communicate.

"Please… he…lp… me……"

The falling tears did not stop. In the bottom corner of my eye I could see the formation and deformation of red on the ground. All I hoped was it was not blood.

"I will help you. Tell me how." I said. I expected a long pause, but she immediately spoke once more.

"Please…… you… must… stop… them…… they… must… be…-"

A crumpled noise came from her mouth, as if she was unable to speak again. She stopped crying. The pupils of her eyes were getting smaller and smaller, as if she was completely drowned in fear. Then, they expanded again. Before I could react again, her eyelids slowly began to close. Her body leaned forward, and she began to fall. I instantly caught her. The blood on my hands stained her hair and clothes. I placed her on the ground and looked her face. Her eyes were completely shut and her skin was very pale. This was wrong. I began to shake to in an attempt to wake her.

"Aura! Wake up! Please, wake up!"

She did not budge. Her eyes were covered by her delicate bangs. I stopped shaking her. I remembered. The state she was in now… it was just like how she was before… before she first awakened… this was how she was… floating above the bed… for so long…

I didn't no what to do. Silence overtook my thinking and there was nothing I could do that would make Aura open her eyes.

"This… cannot be. Why… why is it happening again… why…?"

The voice I heard before had now spoken again.

You cannot awaken her, she is with me. And you will soon be as well…

I dropped Aura and put my hands roughly to my ears. I didn't want to hear that voice again.

"NO! SHUT UP! I DON'T WANT TO BE HERE! I WANT TO LEAVE! LEAVE ME ALONE! LEAVE ME ALONE! LEAVE ME ALONE!!!!"

Everything began to happen so quickly. The ground disappeared. My feet felt no support. Aura and I began to fall rapidly to nowhere. I reached out my arm to try and grab Aura, who sinked completely in unconsciousness, but I was plunging faster than she was and before I knew it she was out of sight and everything was dark once more.

I felt like I was asleep for hours, maybe even days. I opened my eyes and managed to feel my whole body on the hard pavement. I realized where I was and got straight up with all the strength I had left. I was back in Dona Roriak. Whatever blood was on me was now gone, as if I was never stained with it at all. I laid there for a few minutes, looking on my side. The sun was close to setting, there was a slightly cold wind blowing past me. I tried to get up, but even that was hard enough. What was harder was to think about what just happened. Nothing seemed to pass through my mind with proper perspective. It was as if I had a very strong magnifying glass in front of me. Everything seemed so close… but… yet… everything seemed so far…

After a while I managed to get up on my knees with the help of my staff. The sun was just giving off its last orange rays until it slowly crept below the horizon. I felt my silver hair brushing past my eyes and in the background was the solid, brown ground which I stared at for as long as until I heard a voice through my ear. It was still a bit hard to move. I gradually turned my head and saw, in a distance, Mimiru and the others running to where I was. There was another one with them, who I suspected was Krim.

Although my vision was a bit blurry, I was able to get a fix of Krim's appearance. He seemed to have hair like before, but shorter and it looked more to the colour purple. His suit looked a bit complicated. He wore a dark red shirt with many rope-like strings surround him in all directions. It was a bit hard for my brain to concentrate on the formation of it. His pants were dark red too… baggy like before… not much of a change there…

The stomping of their shoes made more noise than their voices calling out to me. They knew that I noticed them, but I had no more energy to stand up. I waited a little while until they finally came. Mimiru and Subaru crouched down to me.

"Tsukasa, are you alright? What happened to you? We were so worried!" Subaru said, with a concerned look on her face. Mimiru looked as if she was about to say something, but wanted to wait until I said answered.

"I'm sorry… I… don't know what happened… " That was all I could blankly say. I seriously could not understand my surroundings as I did before. It was as if I was drained of all my energy. Everyone almost blurred before my eyes, but I was able to regain sight for a while. I could tell by the look on their eyes that they knew something bad happened to me.

Finally, Mimiru said, "Well, as long as you're okay. We better go now. You can go back to Bear's after we log off." Bear nodded right afterwards.

At first I liked the idea, but something made me want to stay in the World. My whole perspective changed so rapidly. I wanted to leave before, but what made me want to stay now? I didn't know what because my mind was crammed with confusion and dilutions. Krim came up to me and managed to lift me up.

"It's good to see you again, but I was hoping to see you in a better shape." He said, with a small smile. I felt so dumb, I couldn't even smile back in my condition. The best thing I could do now was go home… I guess. Mimiru then put my arm over her shoulders and we walked to the portal, which wasn't too far. The others followed.

"I'll be here again tomorrow at noon if anyone wishes to meet me," BT said. Everyone nodded, giving their approval on the idea. I gave a slight moan, which was my approval. Mimiru kept a tight grip on my arm as I felt myself getting weaker. I realized now that getting out of The World was for the best. Without another thought, we all left.

After a slight vision of falling through a deep hole, I was able to grab onto my helmet and slowly take it off. I was in Mimiru's room. The light from her ceiling lamp struck through my eyes and felt as if it was piercing through my head. I felt a little better, but only slightly. I turned to my side and saw Mimiru taking off her helmet. She gave me a pressurizing stare, which made me feel more locked up than I already was.

"Okay, now you can tell me what the hell happened there. Why didn't you come? We were waiting for you for so long! Something did happen… didn't it? Well, we won't be able to help you unless you tell us what! Well?" She exclaimed. I still had difficulty to think straight, so I couldn't catch every word she said. All I wanted to do now was leave.

"May I use the washroom?" I managed to ask. Her stare swelled into a puzzling state. Without hearing an answer, I made my way out of the room and into the washroom, which was on the other side of the hallway. The apartment she lived in was small, but the hallways always seemed so long and right now it was extremely hard for me to keep vision of the door I was walking to.

I went into the washroom. I turned on the tap and cleansed my hands. Although there was no sense or proof of blood being on me, I never felt so filthy in my life. While leaving the tap on, I was beginning to remember the incident back in The World… the voice… the blood…

I looked at the mirror in front of me. I was a girl again. My short brown hair… my dark blue eyes… I never truly recognized myself every time I left The World. I never felt the same way about myself… but all I knew was that I was Tsukasa forever. That was me. I was loosing myself, but I was also regaining. The confusion didn't hurt my mind… it kept it in a bit of a balance, and my soul flowed with it. I always felt that a mirror projected one's soul, so when I look in a mirror I see my true self. But if I looked in a mirror in The World, I would see myself as Tsukasa… yes… I would… so then… I must have two souls… one real and one illusory. I wouldn't have the real soul when I'm in The World… no… that wouldn't make much sense. This is where my soul was… where it belonged…

I tried to take my mind off that matter, the whole discussion with myself about souls didn't seem so meaningful… but there was something about the matter of souls which was stranded in the corner of my mind.

Mimiru walked in the room. I closed the tap, walked up to her without washing my hands, and said, "I'm going home now. Call Bear for me and tell him that." I said nothing afterwards. I was surprised that Mimiru said nothing either. I slid my feet into my shoes and grabbed my coat with my cold hands. After I put it on, I opened the door and left without closing it. As I walked to the elevator, I could sense that Mimiru was standing at the side of her door… watching me…

I went in the elevator. I hated elevators, especially when I was alone. I always felt as if I was trapped with no way out. It was a mild paranoia, which never disappeared, but I am able to live with it. I slanted on the side of the elevator. The ride took longer than usual. Perhaps my mind was on the verge of becoming inactive. I tried my best to think about The World. I knew someone there needed my help. The noises of the elevator were giving me a slight headache. Soon, the doors opened and I stepped out.

I opened the door that freed me to the outside. Everything was white. It was the first snowfall of the month. It seemed to come a bit early, since it was only the middle of October.

I began walking down the road. The snowflakes kept a gentle pace down from the sky, and I felt them melt into my hair. It was a silent night, and I didn't hear elevator noises anymore, but my headache became worse. I put one hand on my head and closed my eyes while still continuing to walk. It was a strain that I couldn't get rid of. Something was troubling my mind and I was unable to reach it. I couldn't reach my problems… I couldn't…

I then tripped on a sidewalk crack and fell forward. I tried to bring my hands to support me, but it was too late. I fell face-first into the cold snow which, in only a few seconds, numbed all through me. I was all alone, and no one saw me. It was dark and I couldn't see much. I used my arms to push myself up so I was sitting on my knees. Tender pain was the only thing I could feel through my numbness.

I looked at my hand. It was bleeding. The blood ran from the top front of my hand down to my wrist. I could feel the blood, which was cold and thick. I felt the same feeling on the side of my head. I raised my other hand and touched my right cheek. As I looked at my fingers, they were covered in dark red blood.

The blood… I remembered…

I dropped my bloody hand to my side. It hit the snow, which I couldn't feel anymore. The blood trilled from my hand settled into the snow, and instead of melting it, it was as if it became one with it. The blood continued to droop into the snow, and I watched it. I didn't notice the fact that I was losing quite a bit of blood, since the stain of it became bigger and bigger on the snow. I let my mind see instead of understand.

It was now rather painful, but I thought to myself, She must be in much more pain…

I left my hand there. I dropped my other hand into the snow. The blood on my fingers had already been stained into my skin, and stayed on the surface of it. Again, I did not feel the cold. I felt nothing but pain…

I looked up into the snow-filled sky. It was snowing much more now. The sky was dark grey, and once more I felt trapped… trapped by the snow… trapped by the clouds… trapped in blood… trapped in myself…

I kept my head looking at the sky. The snow looked so gentle as it fell from the sky… touched ever so lightly my face. Time seemed to flow so slowly, and I did nothing but stare up into nothing. As the small snowflakes fell in my eyes, they began to water… but I knew they did not water because of the snow…

There was nothing I could do. I knew I didn't belong here, but trying to go back wasn't much of an option at that moment. All I could do was lie there… staring into the sky… thinking to myself… everything becoming a dreadful fantasy…

Aura… I'm sorry…