Summary: Tonks comes upon Sirius experiencing another memory in the pensieve.

Pensieve Moments
Walk on the Dark Side

Nymphadora Tonks entered number twelve as quietly as possible. She grumbled about the poor timing since she found that Lupin was leaving London just as she was returning from a mission that took longer than anticpated. Still, the Auror had promised the Professor that she would check on Sirius Black. She yawned widely as she made her way up the stairs, but stopped when she heard an agitated voice.

She frowned as she recognized Sirius' voice. She followed quietly for it sounded as if he were speaking with someone. As she walked on, she realized a door had appeared where she had never seen one before. She fingered her wand and drew it as she walked forward.

"Sirius?" Her quiet voice fell in the darkness of the room. She could see a dim light in front of where Sirius was kneeling. Her query was ignored, but a few quick steps brought her further into the room where she changed her angle of approach. She soon detected the focus of his attention. A pensieve?

"Sirius, get away from there, NOW!" She called as much authority into her voice as she could muster. Any pensieve found in this house was likely to have horrifying memories stored in it.

Sirius seemed to move like a puppet as he stood up, but his eyes still fell on the pensieve. Tonks moved forward carefully and again said sternly, "Move away from it, Sirius."

"Tonks?" Sirius finally tore his eyes away from the pensieve. "Are you?" He seemed to scan her, then pointed to the pensieve, "But you were just a child."

Tonks was next to Sirius now, so she peered at the pensieve in spite of the alarms in her head warning her it would be a mistake. It took her only a moment to recognize her Aunt Bellatrix kneeling by a little girl as a man's voice spoke in the background. She could hear the mewling of kittens as well. The man's voice belonged to Sirius' father.

"Quit wasting your time with the brat. She'll never have any power."

"No, I think we need to test her further. Come on, my pretty pet, try again. Make them go quiet, make them go still. See? I think you got one. See how easy it is. Now try another--"

"Get the hell away from her!" Sirius scooped up the little girl at a dead run. He turned with the child holding on to one arm while his other wielded his wand.

Bellatrix' laughter rang out. "You have quite an interfering puppy there, Uncle. He can't be serious! Wait, it is little Sirius, isn't it? He's grown rather cocky, don't you think?"

The woman raised her wand, but then Ted Tonks' voice called out, "Run, Sirius! Get Tonksie out of here!"

Sirius began to run and at this point the four-year old Tonks was whimpering into his shoulder. The teenager turned to find Ted Tonks losing the battle, but not without a small victory. A green potion covered the malevolent pair and they were in clear distress as they began wheezing for breath and breaking out in a horrid rash.

Tonks couldn't look away from the image. As a child she had a bare memory of running into her aunt on that summer day. As an adult, she was disturbed by the games the two adults were playing with the child and horrified by what they had done to her father.

This time it was Sirius who realized the danger in viewing the pensieve. He grabbed her arm and shoved her out of the room. The door shut and disappeared with a shimmer. Tonks remained pale-faced and still as she leaned against the wall.

Sirius shook Tonks' shoulders and said, "It wasn't your fault, Tonks, it was mine. I was supposed to watch you at the Black family reunion, but I got distracted."

Tonks turned to Sirius and blinked. "I killed it, didn't I? The little kitten. They were trying to..."

Her voice dropped off at the thought and she shook her head before she clutched Sirius' arms. "My father! They're the reason Pops is so addle brained, aren't they? I thought it was just the Muggle drugs."

Sirius flinched at her discovery. He couldn't look Tonks in the eye as he admitted, "Ted was just recovering from the Muggle drugs when this happened. It was such a waste. He was a brilliant potions master, you know."

Tonks nodded. "If it weren't for Pops I never would have gotten my NEWT in Potions. He remembered enough to tutor me during weekends. What was that potion he threw at them?"

Sirius released a long breath before replying. "It was a work of genius. Remus says even Snape couldn't have made such a potion when I hypothetically described it to him. The potion burned their skin and induced an allergic reaction in them if they touched you again. Oh, yes, they tried to get you away from me that day until they realized the effect. Ted was always a bit of a goof, but your father did the best thing he could to protect you, Tonks."

"At the cost of his mental stability," sighed Tonks. "Why didn't anyone tell me about this before?"

"Andi cast a little obliviate spell on you because Ted asked her to when he was recuperating. But now you know." And you know how I failed you, thought Sirius.

Tonks closed her eyes and struck her head lightly against the wall. "You know, part of me is glad Remus wasn't here to see this, but another part of me wishes he were here. "

Sirius smiled as he said, "If Remus were here you'd be too busy making up for that disastrous honey note you sent him."

"What? Don't tell me I flamed him!" Tonks' voice held a note of dismay.

"I'll have you know that you've singed me in worse ways when I was a guinea pig for your honey notes," said Sirius defensively. "And you were never contrite about that."

"That's because you were just my darling cousin, not my darling, uh, darling." Tonks shook her head. "I'm not making sense anymore. Let's call it a night and take it up in the morning."

"Fine by me."

"Sirius? Do you think I'm cruel at heart? Do you think I'm just fooling myself and that--that I'm really like Bellatrix?"

Tonks voice sounded quite young to him at the moment. Sirius took her hand in his and patted it gently. "No, Tonks, you are not like Bellatrix. Granted, I think we both are capable of performing vile acts, but the important thing is that we recognize them as that. And we have people like Remus who help us out when the line gets fuzzy."

At that moment, the portrait of Mrs. Black began ranting as the front door opened. Sirius and Tonks scrambled down the stairs and Remus Lupin was quite surprised when the witch practically flew at him with a leap off the railing.

"You're back!" she cried as she hugged him while Sirius went to deal with the portrait.

"But not breathing. Could you ease up a bit there," asked Lupin.

"Sorry," said Tonks sheepishly as she settled for a quick peck on his chin.

Lupin nodded, but kept his arm around her waist as he spoke to Sirius. "The place was empty when I got there, so Dumbledore sent me home until further notice. I might get sent off at any time, though."

"Then you better get your rest," said Sirius. "Good night."

Sirius turned away to walk up the stairs, but Lupin was distracted by how much Tonks seemed to need to hold onto him. He rested his chin atop her head as the sense of belonging flowed through him. Still, Nymphadora Tonks was not a woman anyone would describe as a clinging vine. After a few moments, he asked, "Is there something you want to tell me?"

"How about that I'm sorry I flamed you with my honey note," said Tonks into his shoulder.

She sounded so young and vulnerable that Lupin only indulged in a quiet chuckle. "I'll get payback, don't you fret. Actually, it helped distract Sirius from bad memories. He stumbled upon a pensieve--"

Tonks suddenly stiffened against Lupin and he responded by gently rubbing circles on her back. He waited patiently until she confessed, "Sirius found it again tonight."

Lupin glanced up the stairs, obviously surprised that his wards had not held. "I'll have to seal the room again."

"You won't be able to find it; the room vanished as soon as Sirius took me out of there," admitted Tonks.

Lupin looked at her sharply as the obvious conclusion arose in his thoughts. "Did you see something in the pensieve, Tonks?"

Tonks gripped his hand, but was able to meet his eyes. "Let's go up to bed and I'll tell you all about it."

"All right." He put his arm around her waist and they began walking up the stairs. "Do you think I should check on Sirius?"

"No, the memory had more to do with me than him," said Tonks. They entered Lupin's room without regret when they saw that Sirius already had his light out.

But in the darkened room, Sirius Black was taking another sip of the fire whiskey that had been so conveniently left for him by the house elf. A sense of failure filled him again as he saw his little cousin being taught to explore the dark side of magic. She was innocent, she had been in his care, but he had been too busy flirting with that Romei woman. The look of disgust on Tonks face tonight at her actions as a child had cut him like a knife.

And then there was Ted Tonks. His whole life had changed because of the carelessness of a teen-aged boy. Yes, Ted had to have come prepared with the intent to use the potion, but knowing the meek nature of the man, he probably had intended it as a last resort. Sirius took another drink, but couldn't obliterate the guilt.

Kreacher was as happy as a wretched creature could be by the effect the pensieve had on his Master. It had taken him a while to deal with the wards that horrid Werewolf had placed on the entrance, but now the pensieve was safe and undisturbed, just waiting for Sirius Black to stumble onto it again.

TBC

Author note: Sorry it's so short. Things have kept me busy and I didn't want folks thinking that I've abandoned the story.

The point of the memories is that Sirius is not directly attacked through magic. It's a psychological pain he has to deal with. I used this memory to set up more background for Tonks as well.

Thanks for reading. I know these memories are darker than the fluff I usually write. Be patient; there is a point to them.