Title: Seasons change
Date Written: 1/08/05
Author: Lilparkergirl
Rating: PG
Summary: This is a story with multiple parts, mostly focusing on Kirsten and Sandy.

Author's Notes: This story has some parts where it doesn't exactly respect the storyline of the show, just tiny details you might notice, nothing big. Some things just haven't happened (yet), or have been forgotten. I will try to update the story as regularly as possible, but I need ideas. Feel free to give me any suggestions, or to tell me my work sucks, as long as you tell me what you think about the story. If you have any ideas about how to improve my writing, or any ideas what could happen in the story, let me know, and I'll consider it.
Disclaimer: The OC is not mine, the characters are not mine. This is only a work of fiction. Any resemblance to real people, organizations, or events is a coincidence.

CHAPTER 2

One late Sunday morning during a typical hot California day, Kirsten wakes up and finds Sandy staring at her. "I'm sorry, you're just so beautiful, I can't stop looking at you." He excuses himself. He knows Kirsten doesn't like it when he watches her sleep, but he can't help himself. Every time he sees her, he is astonished by her magnificence. Laughing, Kirsten says: "How come you're not out surfing? Are the waves no good this morning?"

"You know a few weeks ago, when you told me about the baby, I thought we should have a talk. Get rid of other possible secrets; take this occasion to get to know each other better. I know that you can't possibly know everything about one another, but we've been married for so long, that I think we should have earned each other's trust by now. It might help, if we know secrets, it can make it easier for me to understand you, and your actions. Because there are times when I just don't know, I feel left out, like there's something I've missed. I've been thinking about it, and I realized that you might have that same problem. Kirsten, you've told me everything about you over the years, will you help me fill up the gaps?"

Kirsten thought about what Sandy had just asked her to do a few seconds ago. It was hard for her to make a decision, to talk about the things she knew he was aiming for. Sandy saw her thinking, when she thought about something she could be completely gone, and not notice anything going on around her. You could tell from the glaze in her eyes and her biting on her lower lip. Deciding it was okay to trust Sandy, Kirsten started talking, seeming almost emotionless.

"A lot of things happened in my past Sandy, things that I'm not proud of, but things which I can't ignore. I am not the girl with the perfect childhood you think I am. There have been really tough times for me, and I want you to know, every time I think about what happened, I wish I would never have existed. But then I think about you, about us, and it makes everything all right." She closed her eyes for a moment to get everything sorted out in her head, when she felt the touch of Sandy's hand holding on to hers, encouraging her to trust him, convincing her to speak. "If you don't want to do this, don't feel forced to, I want you to tell me, but only if you're sure that's what you want. Don't do it for me, but for yourself. Sweetheart, I don't want you to worry about it. It's up to you."

Feeling Kirsten shake like this scared him, he had never seen her in this kind of state. Her face was like a blank page, cold and unaffected. "In college, when I was with Jimmy, I waited for him with his roommates one night. They did things to me, Sandy, things I thought only happened in stories at the time. Ross and David, they threatened to kill me if I would tell anyone, especially Jimmy. Nobody knows, except for you. That's why, when you had that big party with the associates at your company last month, and I noticed Ross was there, I suddenly became quiet and wanted to go home. I still haven't thanked you for actually taking me back, I really appreciate it. It wasn't some stupid headache; I couldn't stand having to see him, reliving what he had done to me, together with David."

It felt weird for Sandy to be the only one crying, when after what Kirsten had told him, he found it should have been her. "I'm going to kill that bastard!" He hissed through his front teeth, feeling all the anger had he succeeded to bottle up over the years getting ready to come out. Kirsten seemed almost in shock, shaking more and more every second. Sandy held her close to him and slid his right hand up and down her back. Trying to make her feel better was actually making everything worse. "Sandy, can you please leave me alone for a while. I don't want to talk to anyone. I need a minute to think about things." Kirsten asked him, causing an astonished look on Sandy's face. "Sure honey, call me if you need anything, anything at all. I love you." Kirsten said nothing back; she was already too lost in her own thoughts, in her memories.

Turning his back on her, Sandy felt his heart beating in his throat. He knew all of this was his fault, he had asked her to tell her everything in the first place. The wetsuit he had put on earlier this morning was tightening and gripping his skin uncomfortably. Meanwhile, Kirsten was sitting on the bed, her knees pulled up, with a blanket covering her. She was shivering and realized that by asking Sandy to leave, she had made a big mistake. Trying to get closer only seemed to tear them apart.

Having heard Kirsten's sobbing, Ryan knocked on the door and strolled in, without waiting for permission. What he saw there frightened him, but he refused to show it. Kirsten had moved to a small corner behind their bed, still trembling. Her hands were covering her head, her face buried in her knees. All folded up, she looked like a sad little thing. Ryan instantly felt sorry for her, even though he didn't know why she was acting like this. "Kirsten… What's wrong? Is there anything you need?"

All she needed now was Sandy, who was probably out surfing now that she had rejected him in a horrible way. "Where's Sandy? Can you please ask him to come? I need him, more than I ever did." Ryan heard her mumble from her knees. Kirsten was afraid to show her face, she didn't like to have people see her cry. And when they did, she would never show them her face, it was something she had had a habit of doing ever since she was a little girl. She'd lock herself in her room, letting nobody come in, and just cry. When somebody did manage to force the door open, she'd hide under a blanket, and the only way to get it from her, was to tear it away. Luckily for her it never went that far, leaving her with the tendency of hiding when something went wrong.

Ryan left and a few seconds later Sandy hurried in. He smoothly closed the door behind him, showing Seth, who had been watching the room from a distance, that this was not a good time to come in. Not knowing what to do, Sandy stayed frozen just in front of the door, looking at his wife. She looked up, her eyes almost entirely red, as was her face, which always happened when she cried. The look she gave Sandy made him feel pitiful; she appeared to him this small girl, who had had everything taken away from her. Standing up, she dropped her white blanket on the floor, and started approaching Sandy. She moved slowly, gracefully towards him. You could tell she was in pain, not physically, but mentally.

Finally arriving on the spot where Sandy was, she pushed her body against his, and put her arms around him. "Hold me." She said, laying her head on his shoulder, where she felt most comfortable. Placing his arms around her frail body, he pulled her even closer and held her, just like she had asked him to.