Title: Breakaway
Author: Katarina Maru
Rating: G
Disclaimer: I am a broke college student who owes more money than she actually has….so JAG…the characters, the story, the name, the song "Breakaway" none of it is mine….Kelly Clarkson wrote the song…and a great song it is….
Summary/Explanation: Ok, so this is the final installment of the Breakaway Series. It was inspired by the Series Finale, so if you haven't seen it don't read this. I wouldn't want to be the reason you were spoiled. This picks up where the episode left off…yes…I am offering my conclusion to the coin toss…enjoy….Read and Review too…pretty please!
Breakaway
Tails…tails…that one word….one side of a coin…that is what's going to decide my fate. I watch as the coin goes up and starts to flip back down. Then something happens. Everything begins to slow down almost like it's going in slow motion. I can hear Harriet's voice, and Jenn is saying something, but what they are saying is being drowned out by the song in the back ground. Why I am taking such interest in a song at this moment in time is beyond me, but it might have something to do with the fact that this song, like many that I love, tends to make me think about my life. And the fact that it is playing in this bar, on this night, at this moment…well, it has got to be a sign.
Grew up in a small
town
And when the rain would fall down
I'd just stare out my
window
Dreamin' of what could be
And if I'd end up happy
I
would pray
Trying hard to reach out
But when I tried to speak
out
Felt like no one could hear me
Wanted to belong here
But
something felt so wrong here
So I'd pray
I could breakaway
I never would have dreamed of becoming the Mrs. Harmon Rabb, Jr. I admit, after we made the baby deal I did often wonder if marriage would be a part of it. And when Mic left, I prayed everyday that Harm would just let go. I was beginning to feel like I didn't belong in his life. So I ran, but I still prayed. I watch as the coin slowly makes its way back down to the earth and I listen to the words that are floating through the bar.
I'll spread my wings
and I'll learn how to fly
I'll do what it takes 'til I touch the
sky
And I'll make a wish, take a chance, make a change
And
breakaway
Out of the darkness and into the sun
But I won't
forget all the ones that I love
I'll take a risk, take a chance,
make a change
And breakaway
Damn this song! I shouldn't be watching my life play out like a bad TV drama right before my eyes. I should be keeping my eyes on that damn coin to make sure it doesn't roll off into some floor vent or under some barstool. Instead, I am standing here next to the man I love and holding on to him like there is no tomorrow. A few hours ago it felt like there was no tomorrow. Now I know there will be one; it's just a matter of deciding where we will be spending tomorrow. Maybe this is a test. Maybe it's time for me to learn how to fly and take a chance. Harm has already given up so many things in the name of our love. And yes, it will be hard for me to go away; I won't forget the ones that truly mean something to me. I could never forget little AJ, Jimmy, the twins, or even baby Sarah. I feel Harm drawing little circles through the fabric of my dress. With my eyes still on the coin, I reach up and gently touch his gold wings.
Wanna feel the warm
breeze
Sleep under a palm tree
Feel the rush of the ocean
Get
on board a fast train
Travel on a jet plane
Far away,
And
breakaway
For some reason those words speak to me. They are such simple dreams; nothing that can't be completed before one passes into the next world. Dreams that I myself had as a young girl. Dreams I have been able to fulfill with the help of the Corps, my friends—no, they aren't my friends. They are my family. And Harm. How could I forget how many dreams Harm made come true with out even knowing it? One day, I promise I will tell him. But for now, I'll keep them to myself. Wouldn't want anyone else to be distracted from the coin that is slowly making its way back down to earth. I listen to the course of the song again trying desperately to ignore the meaning. It is almost like Fate is trying to tell me to do something. 'WHAT! WHAT IS IT THAT YOU WANT ME TO DO?' I scream to myself. I start to close my eyes to blink, but I stop. I am afraid that if I blink this will all disappear. That I will wake up only to find out that it is all a dream. The coin still falls, and the song still plays on.
Buildings with a
hundred floors
Swinging 'round revolving doors
Maybe I don't
know where they'll take me, but
Gotta keep movin' on, movin'
on
Fly away
Breakaway
Who needs revolving doors when you have flipping coins to decide your destination in life? Maybe that's it. Maybe the coin toss isn't Fate's way of deciding which one of us will make the hardest decision of our lives. Maybe it's Fate's way of distracting the others so that she could tell me that it's time. Time for me to do the one thing I accused Harm of never being able to do. He has said the words, and already given up his career for me once. That's gotta be it. There is no other way to explain it. I may not want to leave Washington, or the United States for that matter, but Lord knows I am in too deep. There is no way I am backing down now. I watch as the coin comes closer to the ground and listen to the last course of the song. And pray that what I am about to do is the right thing and not some huge misunderstanding between me and Fate.
I'll spread my wings
and I'll learn how to fly
Though it's not easy to tell you
goodbye
Gotta take a risk, take a chance, make a change
And
breakaway
No, it won't be easy saying goodbye to all of them. But what I will be gaining is something I have always wanted. I have always lived my life for others, and it's time I take the chance and let someone else live their life for me. I need a break and if that means breaking away and leaving it all behind in the name of love, then you bet your sweet six I am gonna do it.
Out of the darkness
and into the sun
But I won't forget the place I come from
I
gotta take a risk, take a chance, make a change
And breakaway
I will never forget the place I come from. It is not possible. Only because, if it weren't for that place, I would never have realized what a strong and powerful person I am. I would never have joined the Corps. I never would have walked into that Rose Garden on that fateful day. Yes, I am making the right decision. For the first time since Bud flipped that blasted coin, I look away from it's falling figure and look at Harm. He looks down and me and smiles. Yes….this is my chance…
Breakaway
My eyes slowly make their way back to the coin. I have never had any luck with these coin tosses. But something tells me my fate is about to change. I listen to the song and realize it's almost over. Time has all but stood still for the last 3 minutes and 37, no wait, 29 seconds. I slowly reach my hand out….
Breakaway
And watch as the coin gently falls into my palm.
"Sarah, what are you doing?" I hear Harriet giggle at the use of my first name. Everyone else in the group is just staring at me in total shock. None of us have looked at the coin.
"It's time, Harm. It's time I take a risk. I have wished on so many stars and prayed on so many lonely nights that this…us…would happen. If me leaving all of this behind means I'll die happy and in love, then fine, I choose to breakaway." I know I am crying; I can feel the tears.
My hand is still out in the middle of the circle we are standing in. The coin still lies flat in the middle of my hand. It's then that Sturgis looks over to see which side landed face up.
He looks at me, and for the first time in a long time, he smiles at me. It's a genuine smile. And then he nods his head a little. No one needs to ask which side laded face up.
Tails…tails…that one word….one side of a coin…and it's a song that decided our fate.
I look up at Harm and lean in to kiss him. This will be a first for us. Kissing in front of our friends and coworkers. But I don't care. He meets me half way and before our lips touch, I softly say…
"Breakaway"