"This is Leslie Lion reporting for the California Scoop. It was a glorious victory for the Bulls, of course. But the most memorable part of the game was not the tense last quarter, but the sweet display at half time. Cartoon mega star, Bugs Bunny, has popped the question! And who is that lucky lady? It is Lola Bunny, his girlfriend since the production of Space Jam. He pulled this latest stunt by writing a romantic poem on the scoreboard. Lola was completely stunned when she saw the poem and her face on the screen. She ran down to the court to find Bugs on one knee. He presented her with a glamorous diamond ring. And what did the femme fatale reply? YES! And the wedding day is yet to be announced. Congratulations future Mr. and Mrs. Bunny!"
News spread like wildfire after that November night. The whole week was about the proposal. In school that was the biggest gossip. Everyone was talking about it.
"Did you hear the news?" asked Babs excitedly
"Who hasn't?" said Buster
"Wow, this is so cool. I mean the way he did it. It was so sweet!"
"He announced his love for her in front of all those people. Le sigh, if only someone would do that for moi," said Fifi
"Did you see that ring? Sheesh! Imagine what the wedding ring would look like!" added Plucky
"I'm like, not surprised at all. Their karma's just spelled it out. It was like, totally meant to be, fer sure," added Shirley
Later in the day, Daffy approached Bugs.
"Alright Bugs! You the man!" said Daffy
"Yeah Daff. For once I'm glad I listened to ya," said Bugs
"You see! The duck is always right! Well, now that your getting married, again, you know what the best part is?"
"Eh, dat I'm goin' to spend da rest of my life wit da woman dat I love?"
"No! We get to have a bachelor party! Its going to be the last time you can enjoy being single, you know, one last fling." (knudge knudge)
"I don't like where dis is goin',"
"Ah c'mon! You're not married yet!"
"Well…OK. But promise me your not goin' ta get one of dose cakes wit a girl in 'em."
"Oh your no fun!"
When Lola got home, she had several messages on her answering machine.
"Beep…Hi Lola its mom, please call me we got to talk woman to woman." Said the message
"Uh oh," Lola muttered
"It's nothing bad, trust me. Beep…"
"Since when is a mother-daughter talk nothing bad? I can feel the sermon coming." Lola pressed the button again.
"Beep…you stupid, no good, husband stealing little b…Message deleted."
"She's got issues," said Lola as she shrugged her shoulders
Just then her phone rang…
"Hello?" answered Lola
"GIRLFRIEND!" screamed the other line
"Hi Petunia,"
"OH MY GOSH! I CAN'T BELIEVE IT!"
"Can you please stop screaming,"
"Sorry. So what are you gonna do now?"
"Well, me and Bugs were supposed to make the preparations tonight for the wedding. You know, date, place, invites, and all that good stuff,"
"I mean other than the obvious!"
"What are you hinting at?"
"A bachlorette party of course!"
"I don't know…wait I got another call…hello?"
"GIRLFRIEND!" yelled the third line
"Hi Melissa," answered Lola, "and please stop screaming."
"Ditto," added Petunia
"Sorry," said Melissa, "I heard the news! That is so awesome!"
"Yeah, I was just telling her that we should have a bachlorette party!" intervened Petunia
"Yeah! That's a great idea!"
"I don't think so. Who knows what could happen at these parties. If Bugs found out, I'd be in trouble!" said Lola
"Nah! Nothing bad is going to happen, so what if I invite a few sexy guys over?" said Melissa
"NO WAY! Bugs would kill me!"
"Sheesh! Fine, I wont invite the guys over. It'll be a girls only thing, like a really big sleepover."
"That sounds better,"
"Don't worry Lo, just leave the preparations to me!"
"Be afraid be very afraid!" said Petunia in a spooky voice.
"Hey! I'll play by the rules!" said Melissa
"How much you wanna bet that she's crossing her fingers?"
"C'mon girls! Stop it!" said Lola
"Fine…well I should be getting to work!" said Melissa
"I gotta go, too," said Petunia
"Bye!" they said together and hanged up at the same time. As soon as Lola hanged up her phone, there was a knock at her door. She went to the door and answered.
"Mom!" Lola exclaimed
"Hi baby!" she said and gave her a hug, "Did you receive my message?"
"Yes. What is it that you want to talk about?"
"You know!"
"I know I do, I'm just helping you to start,"
"Oh…well, your father and I heard the big news! I just can't believe that my baby would-sniff sniff-become such a beautiful woman! Congratulations!"
"Thanks," Lola picked up a tissue box and handed it to her mother. She took one and blew her nose like a trumpet. Lola took her inside and they both sat on the couch.
"I know that you and Bugs had been together for almost two years and all, but are you sure your ready for this type of commitment?"
"Of course I am. I love him so much that I'm willing to share my life with him."
"The life of a married woman is much more complicated than just being his girlfriend. You would have to maintain a household, raise a family, and support Bugs in every way you can. Have you two even talked about this yet?"
"Well…no not really."
"See! You're being to hasty!"
"Mom, I know what I'm doing! I know this isn't pretend or some kind of a game."
"Then why haven't you two talked?"
"Bugs wanted to surprise me, so we never really talked about marriage before."
"He really did surprise you, didn't he?"
"Definitely! Actually, Bugs was supposed to come over later tonight so we could start making the plans,"
"Oh. That's good. But other than the preparations, you too should talk about things like where you're going to live, kids and things of that sort."
"Kids?"
"Yeah! You've got to think about that too."
"I don't know about that…I never thought about having kids. Me? Kids?"
"Well, that's for the both of you to decide. If it was up to me, I have enough grandkids as it is. Well…I've got to go, your father is outside waiting in the car."
"What? And you didn't bring him in?"
"Like I said, a woman to woman talk. Bye sweetheart," said Gladys as she kissed her daughter's cheek.
"Bye mom, say hi to dad for me,"
Later that night, Bugs came over. They both sat on the couch and started to talk.
"OK, so where do we begin?" asked Lola
"How about da locale?" suggested Bugs, "I've been thinkin' about dis place called da Palace dat does catering. It's huge and it's really elegant."
"Is it big enough for all of us?"
"Yeah. Big enough for your family, my family and all our friends,"
"Now that you mention family…"
"What about?"
"Well, I was wondering what you thought about having…kids?"
"Kids? Of our own? I tink dat would be great, but what do you tink?"
"I love kids, I really do. But, I don't know if I'm ready to have one my own, you know,"
"However you feel about, its fine with me. Its up to you," he said placing his arm around her shoulder. She smiled at him.
"So, what about invitations? We have to make a list," said Bugs changing the subject.
"Ok, lets get started,"
They made a list of Bugs' family, Lola's family, and their friends.
"We still haven't decided on a date for the wedding," said Lola
"Considerin' we need about a month or two to prepare, I'd say about January-ish," said Bugs. Lola pulled out a calendar and looked at January.
"The first weekend is the fifth, how about that?" she suggested
"Fine wit me,"
"Ok, now we need a place for our honeymoon," she said with sly eyes.
"How about…Hawaii? For a whole week," he said looking into her eyes.
"Oh! The surf! The hiking! The climbing! That would be so HOT!" she said excitedly
"You want a cooler place?" said Bugs with a smirk. She gave him a friendly nudge. The night continued like that…
Well, lets move on to the beginning of December. Melissa had planned Lola's bachelorette party to be on the first weekend. She reserved this private room at a cool restaurant. The funny thing was that Daffy had made Bugs' bachelor party at the same place, the same date, only at the reserved room right next to the girls'. I'm sure it was just a coinkidink! Wink! Wink!
When Lola arrived, she was impressed with the place. All her girlfriends were there; Melissa, Petunia, Penelope, Prissy, Witch Hazel, She-Devil, Granny, and even Kate was there.
"Hey Kate!" said Lola.
"You didn't think I would miss the party would you?" said Kate
"Where's Mindy?"
"At home, you didn't think I would let her come to a party like this! She's too young!"
"Its not like we're going to have strippers here,"
"That's not what Melissa told me,"
"Huh? Excuse me for a minute,"
Lola looked around and found Melissa.
"Just what kind of a party did you plan?" she asked sternly
"One where we all will have fun! Heh!" said Melissa nervously, "Well lets get this party started!" She grabbed Lola by the wrist and pulled her to the mini-stage. "Now that guest of honor has arrived, we can have a little fun!"
Meanwhile, in the other room…
"For he's a jolly good fellow!
For he's a jolly good fellow!
For he's a jolly good fe-e-e-llow!
Which nobody can deny!"
Was the chant that came from the guys' party. Among them were Daffy, Sylvester, Tweety, Elmer, Yosemite, and Bugs of course. They were just passing the beers around and having a real good time. When they stopped their singing they started to gossip. (Even guys gossip too ya know!)
Daffy was acting Bugs questions like a TV interviewer.
"Mr.Bunny, you are about to enter into the dangerous territory where men go in and are never the same again, how do you feel about this?" said Daffy
"Well, I've been in dat territory before, I'm sure I can handle it," answered Bugs
"That's what they all say! Think of this not as your bachelor party! But rather as your bon-voyage party!"
"We'll drink to that!" yelled the guys as they lifted their glasses.
"Ya'll are crazy!" said Bugs
"We know!"
"Bugs, do you know that your fiancée is not to far away?" said Daffy with an evil grin, "Hey that rhymed!"
"What do ya mean?" asked Bugs
"I know that she is having the time of her life without you at this very moment. I also just happen to know where she is right now,"
At the girls room…
Two well-built guys had come into the room much to the ladies delight, except Lola's. They were wearing these black leather suits and doing this really sexy dance on stage. Melissa hadn't let Lola leave the stage once they came in. Lola was very shocked to see those guys grab her out of Melissa's clutches and dance around with her. They then carried her off to her seat and started to dance around her. They got on stage in front of her and started to take off their clothes! Lola was bright red and tried not to look, but the guys came to her and carried her and her chair onto the stage and started to dance around her. The girls were going crazy, even Granny was yelling, "Take it off baby! Take it off!"
Little did they know that someone was spying on them. Agent Tweety had returned to the Bachelor party and reported what he saw.
"I tawt I taw two vewy big stwippers dancing awound!"
"You sure about dat?" asked Bugs
"I did! I did taw a pair of stwippers!"
"Did he say a pair of slippers?" asked Daffy
"Stwippers!"
"Oh strippers! I guess Lola is having a lot of fun, Bugs. Don't see why we can't have some fun."
"Why do I get da feelin' dat sometin's goin' on here?" said Bugs
At the girls' party, Lola had had enough and grabbed those two strippers and tossed them out the room. "Aw! Your no fun!" yelled the girls in disappointment.
"THAT WAS TOO MUCH MELISSA!" yelled Lola
"But it's only fair for YOU! Bugs is going through the same treatment," said Melissa in response.
"What?"
"Didn't you know that Bugs' bachelor party was next door?" said Melissa innocently, "I'm sure he's having fun! Your just a party pooper,"
"I'll have to see this for myself!" said Lola as she went out the door.
"This is going to be good!" said Melissa chasing after her with a mini camcorder.
At the guys party…
Daffy had tried to calm Bugs down by giving him more beer. Lola had managed to sneak into the room in the back without being noticed. In the back room, she found a female stripper getting ready to go out.
"Hey," Lola whispered, "I think your in the wrong party, the bachelor party is down the hall."
"Really? Thanks!" she said as she went out of the back door.
Lola then spin changed into a leather bra and miniskirt, knee-length high heel boots, fish net stockings, long leather gloves and no outfit would be complete without the whip. She also wore a red wig to hide her hair and her ears. She looked positively sinful in that getup. Daffy came in the room and was stunned. "Whoa! I really got my money's worth! Listen up, when I give the signal you do your thing!" He went out onto the mini-stage and got everyone's attention.
"Gentlemen and… Gentlemen! For your entertainment, we have a special guest. Please put your hands together for Dolores!"
Lola then came out and the boys went wild. Lola used her whip stop them from getting on stage. She did this really sexy dance on stage. The guys were going crazy, they were and hooting and hollering at her. "Shake that booty!" yelled Yosemite
Lola then found Bugs in the crowd and started to dance in front of him. Bugs was drunk and he was just out of it. Lola was wondering what he would do. She was shocked when Bugs suddenly smiled. He got up and picked her up. He carried her off into the back room. "What to go Bugs!" yelled the guys. "What's he going to do!" She thought.
Once Bugs had taken her to the room. He said, "Take it off."
"No way!" yelled Lola
"Enough wit da act,"
"I'm not that kind of a girl!"
"I know dat." Lola was taken aback by that remark. "I know its you Lo, you can take off da wig."
She did so. "How did you know it was me?" she asked.
"Ya eyes gave you away," he said, "Why did ya do dat?" he said with anger in his voice.
"I just wanted to know how you would act in front of another woman," she answered
"You don't trust me?"
"I do trust you! I just don't trust everybody else!"
"How is it dat you can keep tabs on me, while you mess around wit strippers!"
"What! I wasn't messing around with anybody! I never wanted those strippers to come in the first place! Honest!"
"That's not what I heard!"
"Well you heard wrong! Melissa made those strippers come, when I specifically said no!"
"Melissa? Daffy was da one who told me you were wit trippers in your party."
"Melissa was the one who told me you were with strippers in your party, and Daffy was the one who hired the real stripper for your party!"
"Why do I get da feeling dat dey were working together?"
They heard some movement coming from the back door. They went over to it and opened the door. Out tumbled Melissa and Daffy. They got up and laughed nervously. Bugs and Lola stared them down.
"We've had enough of your conspiracy!" yelled Lola
"When we say no strippers, we mean NO STRIPPERS!" yelled Bugs
"C'mon! Can't you guys take a joke?" said Daffy
"It wasn't funny!" they shot back.
"Actually, there is one good thing that came out of this little game," said Melissa hopefully
"What's that?" they asked
"That you to remain faithful to each other. You two should be thanking us," said Melissa bracing herself for an explosion. Bugs and Lola thought for a moment.
"Your right," they said much to Daffy and Melissa's surprise.
"Of course we're right!" replied Daffy
"BUT DON"T DO THAT EVER AGAIN!" Bugs and Lola yelled simultaneously.
"Sheesh! What a pair of grouches!" they said as they left Bugs and Lola alone.
Once they were outside…
"Did you get the tape?" asked Daffy
"Oh yeah!" said Melissa
"Cool! Lets go sell it on the Internet!"
"Daffy!"
"Fine! Lets just show it our close net of friends!"
Once Bugs and Lola were alone…
"They are so bad!" said Lola
"Yeah," said Bugs. He put his arm around Lola's waist and made her face him. "Babe, I hope you wear that outfit for our honeymoon night. Grr…"
She smiled slyly and wrapped her arms around him. "You are so bad!" she said. He then dipped her like a real Casanova and kissed her.
"I know," he said with an evil grin.
"Don't make me get my whip!" she said.
"I hope you do!" he said giving her another kiss. After he finally let her breathe she said dazed, "Whoa!" She snapped out of it and said randomly, "Hey, I wonder what happened to Dolores?"
In the room at the end of the hall…
"Happy Birthday to you, Happy birthday to you, Happy Birthday dear Junior, happy birthday to…."
"YOU!" yelled Dolores as she entered the kids' birthday party. Everyone gasped and mothers covered their children's eyes. "OH CRAP!" said Dolores as she ran out.
J.C. the Wabbit: OK I know this chapter is a little…suggestive. But, I feel I need to put some more drama into the story. Well…let me ask you guys something, do you think that Bugs and Lola should have kids? Personally, I could go either way, but for the story's sake, what do you think? Please respond!