Dillon wasn't sure what was going on, but a part of him did think that Damian was just kidding around. Who could really be that unnerved by fictional works? "Come on, it's just starting to get good!"

"Dillon… I'm not joking. Please." The same sound echoed in his mind over and over. The sound of the gun firing and piercing through human flesh. It was easier to deal with when it was he who saw the shooting, since he had become one who did the shooting, though, it became much harder.

Dillon waited a moment, looking through the glare caused by the screen. He could see Damian's face. Dillon should have gone with his first instinct and just not watched the movie to begin with, but he figured that Damian could handle it if he made it through the first part, which he did. His estimation was gravely incorrect, though, and his best friend was suffering because of it. Without a second's hesitation, Dillon turned the movie off, the screen going black. He got up and turned on the light in the room, illuminating the Morgan penthouse with the flick of a button. "What's wrong?"

Damian fell silent, his hand shaking only slightly. He looked at Dillon, looked at his best friend. There were very little that the two kept from one another, and the fact that Damian had shot Lorenzo Alcazar to death in order to protect his father was not one of them. Despite the protests from his father, his uncle and even his aunt, Damian told Dillon what had happened eventually. He also told Maxie and Georgie. They all knew. The people that Damian could confide in the most, they needed to know what had happened, what he had done. He was a murderer. They could all claim that it was self-defense until they were blue in the face, it did not change the fact that Damian shot Lorenzo Alcazar. He knew that it had to be done, or else his father would have been dead, and he would have died shortly after, but that didn't make dealing with the fact any easier. "Sorry… just, each time I heard the gun go off…"

"You remembered what happened with Alcazar, didn't you?"

"Yeah," he nodded. "I don't think I'll ever forget, Dillon. I shot the man with my father's gun… I saw him take his last breath. The hard part isn't that I had to do it, I know it had to be done… but for me, the hard part is knowing that I did it and I didn't feel any guilt over it when it happened. I was glad that he was gone."

"How many times are we going to go through this, Damian?" Dillon wondered, feeling guilt over what had happened, but knowing full well that his best friend had nothing to do with what had happened. He didn't have a choice. Lorenzo proved to be a very dangerous person. Even though Dillon once thought of him as a casual acquaintance, he knew that, in that moment, Lorenzo wouldn't have cared about who he had to kill. At that time all he cared about was killing Sonny, and anyone who got in the way of that goal was going to find themselves dead on the ground. "You did what you had to do. Alcazar was crazy. He would have shot anyone if they were there. He would have shot me, he would have shot Georgie, he would have shot Maxie. He probably would have shot Michael. You did the best thing that you could!"

Damian didn't believe Dillon entirely. Lorenzo would have never shot Michael. His little brother was too important to Alcazar, and even more important to Carly. The whole reason that he went insane was because of the rejection that she gave Lorenzo after she found out that his plan that was supposed to culminate with Damian's own death almost put Michael in jeopardy. That fact was something that was kept from everyone. If Sonny found out he would take it out of proportion. Carly didn't mean for what happened to him to happen. The sorrow that she felt was enough to purge her of any punishment that Damian could have thought to give her. She was beating herself up enough. "If I did the best thing, Dillon, then why do I feel so horrible about it?"

"Because you're hard on yourself. Too hard, if you want me to be honest. Way too hard on yourself when you don't do anything wrong. You need to work on that."

"When you shoot someone to save the people that you love, we'll talk," Damian was slightly offended by Dillon's comment. He couldn't understand something that was deeply rooted in Damian himself. The fear that he was becoming what he hated. He loved his father, but he didn't love what Sonny did. The killing, the danger, everything that encompassed the life of Sonny Corinthos, and Damian had taken that first step towards being just like that. He came to Port Charles knowing what type of person his father was and finding that the mob boss was just a face. Sonny was a vulnerable person who did his best to keep the people that he loved safe at any cost. He even found out about the dark secret that his family in Los Angeles had hidden from him. Damian was, in many ways, a Prince of Crime. It was a fact that he tried so hard to not embrace, but with that one fatal bullet he had gone towards that path. There were times that he could tell himself that it wasn't the truth, times that he could say that it needed to be done. Times where he could blind himself to the truth. Now was not one of those times. "Why don't we pick up this celebratory movie marathon at another time?" Damian asked, getting up, "I'm not in the mood anymore."

"We can watch something else," Dillon suggested. He had more movies than he knew what to do with. Surely there was something that he could put on that wouldn't bring back the memories of the darkest time in Damian's life. Didn't he still have that copy of the Lion King? Georgie wanted to see it so bad when it came out.

"I just can't do it right now, Dillon. I'm sorry, sorry for snapping at you, too." He did feel bad that he made such a snide remark to Dillon. Dillon deserved better than that. Much better than that. "I'll see you later. If you need me and I'm not at the house, just call the cell, okay?"

"Where are you going?" Dillon asked.

"Maybe nowhere," Damian shrugged. "I don't really know right now. I might stay in the house, but I might get out and walk around in the snow for a bit."

"I could come with you…"

"Dillon, right now I'd really like to be alone," Damian smiled softly and sadly. "Thanks for the offer, but this is one of those times when I need to be by myself. See you later." Damian walked out of the door, shutting it softly and heading across the hallway. He was so distracted by his own inner torment that he didn't see Jason come out of the elevator. Jason didn't say anything, but he could see that there was something bugging Sonny's oldest son. It was rare when something bothered Damian, but Jason didn't want to overstep his bounds. Unlike the others, Damian didn't depend on Jason to fix every single problem that he had. He wasn't like Carly. He was independent, only asking for help when it was the last possible option. Jason would be there for him if he needed it, and Jason knew that Damian knew that fact.

Jason heard the door to the penthouse open and close, he walked into his own house.

"Did you change your mind?"

Jason was halted by the sound of Dillon's voice. There was still a part of Jason that found it hard to believe that Dillon was living with them. Still a part of Jason that didn't want him there, but at least the bigger part of Jason was happy that he was there. Dillon had even managed to get Jason to laugh a few times, it was certainly a change from just living there with Courtney. "What do you mean?"

Dillon, who was fiddling with television, stopped and looked at Jason, those piercing blue eyes that were impossible to read glaring into his soul. It made him feel uncomfortable, and it was made even worse because he felt bad about what had happened with Damian. "I thought you were Damian, sorry."

"I saw him when I came out of the elevator. Something was bothering him."

Dillon sighed. "I'm partly guilty about that."

"How are you guilty about that?" Jason asked, no ideas swarming in that head of his.

"We were watching a movie… I picked the movie and I wasn't thinking about it. I mean, I knew that having the son of Sonny Corinthos watch the Godfather was going to hit a little close to home, but I didn't think that…"

"You just didn't think, did you?" Jason said in the way that Jason said everything and anything. It was the kind of tone that he took with Carly, something that tended to be reserved only for Carly, but Dillon was finding himself on the receiving end of the comment now.

"Jason, I didn't mean to do it!" Dillon defended himself. "We keep on trying to tell him that what happened to Alcazar wasn't his fault, but it's really hard on him."

"Why wouldn't it be?" Jason asked. He knew how much of Damian had been shattered because of that bullet. He could only imagine what such a thing would do to Courtney if she were to do the same thing. They were so alike, it was no wonder that they were blood related. Both tried to be the moral centers in the circle of corruption and death that they lived around, and they were successful for the most part, but it was impossible to change everything about the lifestyle that he and Sonny lead. "I believe that you didn't mean to do it, though, and I know that he knows you didn't mean to do it. Just be more careful in the future, okay?"

"I'll do my best, Jason. Promise." Dillon looked at the door. "Maybe I should go over there and apologize."

"Don't take this the wrong way, Dillon, but when I saw him a minute ago, I knew that he needed his space. Your intentions are good, but if you go over there right now, the only thing you're going to do is make it worse."

"Well then what am I supposed to do?"

"You're young, Dillon. Think of something to occupy your time."

"You want to watch a movie, Jason?" Dillon took a shot in the dark, but Dillon's cold glance showed that he didn't want to. "It was worth a shot, wasn't it?" He didn't even think that he could watch anything with Jason being there. His mind was still preoccupied on what had happened. "I'm such a horrible person…"

"What makes you think that?" Jason asked as he put the gun away. He had since started locking the cabinet, something that he never did before, because he didn't want Dillon touching the gun. His cousin deserved to do something else with his life, which was why Jason agreed to take Dillon out of the Quatermaine mansion, because they wanted to make him into something that he didn't want to be. It would be hypocritical of him to do the same thing that they were doing, just with a different career choice. Besides, while he knew Dillon was responsible and not stupid enough to brandish a gun carelessly, that didn't mean that Jason trusted Dillon. Jason really didn't trust Dillon at all. But he knew that Dillon wasn't a bad person. Dillon's mother was a bad person, but Dillon wasn't anything like Tracy, aside from a cynical joke at random times.

"Because he helped me… and I go and turn around and make him miserable. I thought about her today… you know? About Lila."

"I think about her every day, Dillon," Jason remembered her face. The way that she never judged him, even for the decisions that he had made. The face that would have made him return to the Quatermaine house if she just asked, but she didn't, not really. She wanted him to do what made her happy, and even if that meant sacrificing her own happiness she wouldn't try and force her will on anyone else. It was because of Lila's wonderful spirit and gentility that Jason took her last name after the accident, it was because of Lila's personality that Jason had become the type of person who always put the needs of everyone else in front of his own. Jason missed her, more than he would ever let on. The funeral was hard on him. Really hard. Emily and Courtney helped him out as much as they could, but Jason had lost something with Lila, a part of his hope. Nobody was eternal, he just always thought that she would be there for him. She was, he knew that she was, but it was harder knowing that he couldn't drive by the Quatermaine Mansion and see her in the window.

"He helped me out when we first got the news, and he helped me earlier today when I needed someone to just be there for me, and I think I made his own problems worse."

"You didn't, Dillon. Believe me. His problem with what happened that night couldn't be made worse by anyone but him. The only thing that we can do is the same thing that he does for us, just be there for him and he'll come when the time is right."

"It's almost Christmas, Jason," Dillon changed the subject. "I only had a few Christmases with Grandma, but she always lit up when she saw the tree decorated in the mansion. When I came back here after being away that first year she insisted that I put up the star. We did it together, alone, just me and her. I knew she wouldn't judge me, but I was so nervous about doing it wrong. Like, if I made it crooked or if I dropped it or something. It had to be perfect… because I didn't want to let her down."

"You could never let her down, not as long as you did what made you happy. She told me that once and it was what got her through life."

"I'm glad I'm not at the mansion. I don't think I could look at the star on the tree and not think about her, and know that she's not with us anymore." He remembered how much he protested that something was wrong with the star that Christmas, but she constantly insisted that it was perfect. The memory caused a somber smile to spread on his face, and he looked over at Jason, who looked like he was in deep contemplation as well.