THE BEST SACRIFICE
PART ONE
The battle between good and evil, light and dark, Harry Potter and Voldemort lasted for nearly two years. There were numerous casualties on both sides but in the end, Harry Potter, the "Boy Who Lived" won. However, he didn't do it alone. Oh, no, Harry Potter had had a lot of help, so much help in fact that he had lost one of his closet and dearest friends. Hermione Granger, Gryffindor 'Know-it all' had been lost and her body had never been found. It was a moment in time when Professor Severus Snape would never forget.
The battle had finally reached its climax. Everyone on the scorched and bloody field knew it. The air buzzed with the amount of magic being used. Albus Dumbledore, Minerva McGonagall, Filius Flitwick, Pomona Sprout, Harry Potter, the entire Weasley family, including Percy, Remus Lupin, Aurors Tonks, Shaklebolt, Mad-Eye Moody, Hermione Granger, surprisingly Draco Malfoy and of course Severus Snape had all been fighting madly against the raging Death Eaters that had seemed unending in their pursuit. Harry Potter was surrounded by the members of the Order of Phoenix and his best friends. Apart from Harry, Severus and Draco had been shielded as well due to their being related to the Death Eaters in some form: Severus having been a former Death Eater and now a traitor and a spy for the Order and Draco's father being a Death Eater who had been unsuccessful in turning Draco to the Dark Lord's side.
This was the first time the members of the Order had actually gotten close to Lord Voldemort to fight him. He had usually sent out his Death Eaters to do the fighting but now it seemed he was ready to end the war once and for all. It wasn't hard to find the Dark Lord as he was standing on top of a large hill while the storm caused by the magic raged about him. It was rather dramatic and appropriate for the setting, Severus had noted as the members of the Order began to form their formation to protect Harry. It was very difficult to get through the Death Eaters who began firing curses as soon as the Order was within sight. Everyone save for Harry began returning the curses with as much vigor as they could despite being so tired. Most of them hadn't slept in days and what little they had gotten were only a couple of hours at most. Severus had smirked humorlessly when he had overheard Miss Granger muttering how she thought that this must be what it felt like during the Muggle wars.
Severus had watched out for her as best he could while attempting to keep himself from being killed. He had seen numerous students and fellow Order members fall over the last couple of years and to loose Miss Granger would be a blow that he had felt would be too hard for him to handle. She was a constant in his life that he had come to depend on to keep him sane. She wasn't part of the Order yet but when the war had officially started, she and her friends had begun working side by side with the Order members and thus Severus had spent more time with her than he had ever spent with her during the years she had been his student. And she was still technically his student, as she and her friends had not graduated yet when the war started. So, when Harry Potter had finally reached Lord Voldemort and began to duel with him, it had scared Severus to distraction when Harry had stumbled and nearly fell only to be held up by Hermione's magic.
Hermione had begun sending her magic to Harry when it looked as if he was losing his own fast. Lord Voldemort had not been fighting for as long as everyone else and so he was still well stocked in magic and thus stronger than Harry from the beginning of the duel. Severus had tried to fight his way over to Hermione's side but had been waylaid by Death Eaters out for revenge against the traitor. For nearly four hours the battle raged on and all throughout it Hermione had constantly fed Harry her magic, stopping only when she had to blast an enemy away. The air began to feel different right before Lord Voldemort had screamed in pain as he was fatally hit.
As Severus spun around to see what was happening, it was as if he was watching everything in slow motion. Harry had shot the spell from his wand, the Avada Kadavra a brilliant shade of green. It crashed and melded with that of Lord Voldemort's yet it was apparent that Harry's was stronger and thus it over powered Voldemort's and sent both spells back to the dark wizard. Voldemort had been surrounded by the green light for a moment before he exploded. Harry stumbled and fell to his knees, exhausted. A bright surge of power spread out over the entire field from where Lord Voldemort had stood. The screams of the Death Eaters could be heard and even Severus was forced to kneel in agony as his left arm throbbed as though it was being speared with a red hot poker while at the same time being pulled from its socket. He had managed to look up just in time to see Hermione start to collapse in a faint before another bright flash of light lit up the field, blinding all who stood there. The pain in his arm vanished as quickly as it had started and Severus passed out from exhaustion and relief. The war was over and the Order of Phoenix, the light, had won. However, the nagging thought that he needed to go see about Miss Granger had flitted through his mind briefly before all went dark.
He had awoken in a white room that smelled of disinfectants and other medical potions. He had stared at the ceiling for a long while before a nurse came in. Upon seeing he was awake the nurse had hurried over towards him and smiled.
"So, you are awake, Professor Snape. Good. Professor Dumbledore will be pleased to hear it."
Severus hadn't recognized the woman and thus had deducted that he was in St. Mungos instead of at Hogwarts.
"What…"he stopped as his dry throat gave out and he was forced to cough.
"You're at St. Mungos and have been out of it for ten days. You have been severely drained of magic and exhausted. You also had serious burns on your left arm but apart from a light scarring, it's as good as new. Professor Dumbledore woke yesterday and has been asking about you. I shall inform him that you are awake. Is there anything I can get you?"
Severus had been tempted to ask about Miss Granger but instead had requested a drink of water. Once he had had his fill of the water he had closed his eyes and fallen asleep again.
When he woke several hours later, Professor Dumbledore was sitting in a large armchair next to the bed reading the Daily Prophet. A slight frown graced the old wizard's face and he had shaken his head with a sad sigh.
"So many lost, Severus," he said folding the paper.
"Have the Death Eaters been captured?" Severus had whispered since he didn't think his voice was strong enough yet to speak at his normal level. Too many curses and hexes had been shouted for too long.
"It seems as though they have been. They Ministry will begin issuing the Dementor's Kiss next week. They aren't taking any chances this time."
"I should be in Azkaban with them. After all, I too am a Death Eater. I participated in the revels as much as the rest of them." Despite the whisper, the self-loathing was evident in Severus' voice.
"The Ministry knows what you did. But they also know that if anyone else had been in your position they too would have had to participate in those atrocious acts. You have no more right be at Azkaban as I do since I knew what you were doing and I practically told you to do them as much as Tom did," Dumbledore had said, the twinkle missing from his blue eyes.
Severus had remained silent for a moment, staring at the ceiling. Finally he had spoken again. "How are the others?"
"Ah, Mr. Potter has regained consciousness and the Weasleys are all accounted for with a few minor injuries. Most of the Order members are still alive and kicking, though Remus is currently out frolicking in the Forbidden Forest. Young Mr. Malfoy is up and about; it seems he's rather taken with young Miss Weasley." A loud shout and the sound of something metal being thrown had been heard down the hall followed by a shriek of surprise from a woman. "Ah, it seems Minerva is feeling better. Anyway, I believe that answers you question?"
Severus had looked at Albus with a blank expression. He had not told Severus about Hermione. And Severus could see that Albus knew it. "What about Miss Granger?"
"Hmm? Oh, Miss Granger?" Albus had frowned as if in thought but a soft growl from Severus had made him speak again. "We don't know. Her body was not found and her wand was splintered. All attempts at tracing her whereabouts have been fruitless. I'm afraid she is one more casualty." Albus' eyes had shimmered with tears. Severus had felt his chest constrict and breathing had become difficult. A burning sensation had filled his eyes and he knew was close to crying. Albus had seemed to sense the impact his news had left on Severus and so he had left quietly; leaving the Potions Master to grieve in his own way.
And Severus had turned over and buried his face in the pillow in order to muffle his sobs. For the first time in his adult life, Severus Snape cried.
Severus sighed as he looked at the picture in his hands. He was back at Hogwarts and teaching the students that had survived the war as well as the new ones. Harry, Ron, Draco and Ginny were back and despite the fact that they had missed two years of school, they had started right back up where they had left off. They didn't seem to mind being the oldest of their grades by two years though, and Severus was thankful that that made them much more mature than the typical 5th and 6th year students. However, it wasn't the same without Miss Granger walking the halls alongside them. No one knew he still hadn't gotten over her death. Even Dumbledore believed Severus had stopped grieving and was back to his usual bad tempered, bastardly self. But the picture of Miss Granger sleeping on the couch in Number 12 Gimmauld Place proved otherwise.
He had been the one to take the picture. It had been during one of the brief times when the fighting was on hold. The members of the Order had returned to Gimmauld Place in order to set up a new strategy as well as catch up on some much needed rest. Hermione had gone into the library to do some research for Professor McGonagall and instead had fallen asleep on the couch. Severus had gone into the library a couple of hours later in hopes of finding a certain potions book that the Black family had been in possession of and had come across Hermione sound asleep, curled up like a small kitten in the corner of the couch. At the time, Severus didn't know why he had Accioed his camera but now he knew it was because he had been developing feelings for Hermione. Working so close with her had made him see her as an intelligent woman and not a silly little Gryffindor Know-it-all that he had been convinced she would always be. He had thankfully been able to hide his growing tender feelings for the woman and he believed that that had helped him stay alive for much longer than anticipated. So, it was with a strange warmth in his stomach and a slightly fluttering heart that he had raised the camera and captured the peaceful moment on film. It became a picture that kept him sane and gave him a reason, a reminder, for why he had been fighting.
Now as he looked at it, a soft smile tugged at his thin lips. She hadn't woken up, even after the flash of the camera and that had been the only thing that had saved him from having to explain why he was taking pictures of her sleeping. With a sigh, Severus put the picture back in his pocket and returned to the grueling task of grading 4th year essays for his Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw Double Potions class.
He was half way through one detailed though not well written essay when he threw his quill down with a growl. He couldn't concentrate! He kept seeing her hand raising and waving frantically in the air when she knew the answer to a question. He recalled only once ever calling on her and she had answered immediately before even realizing that he had actually called on her. The surprised look on her face had been something he had treasured and had even managed to sketch it out. Hermione was actually the only person who knew he sketched and that was only because she had stumbled upon one of his illustrations when he had asked her to look through some papers on his desk in order to find a specific recipe. One of his sketches had been left on the desk under a pile of essays and Hermione had held it up with a look of awe. It was a sketch of her and Draco working on a potion in class. Both were glaring at each other, not realizing that they were about to put in the wrong ingredients. Thankfully, Hermione had caught the mistake in time but the looks on their faces as they had argued silently had been one that Severus couldn't resist capturing. He would have passed the sketch off as being someone else's, one that he had confiscated during the lesson, but his spidery, yet elegant, signature down in the corner had proved that lie just that, a lie. Severus had actually allowed her to keep the sketch and last he had heard she had had it framed.
Now, he just had to get away from the classroom. There were too many memories of her there. Rising from his desk, he strode to the coat rack standing in the corner and grabbed his teaching robes. He then made his way to his quarters to change.
As he stood staring blankly into his wardrobe he tried to think what to wear. He could just wear his normal black robes but then that would mean he would have to go to Hogsmeade and that place held too many memories of Hermione as well. He knew he had to get off the Hogwarts grounds but if Hogsmeade was out then that meant going into Muggle London. Well, London certainly wouldn't hold too many memories of her, he was sure of that. So, his mind made up, Severus reached into the wardrobe and pulled out one of the three Muggle outfits he owned. A pair of charcoal, pressed slacks, a black turtleneck and a long wool coat that went down to the middle of his shins. He tied his black shoes on and then turned to asses him self in the mirror. Not bad, if he did say so himself. He picked up his hair brush and quickly ran it through his hair, the magic in him causing the hair to crackle and stand on end just a bit. He scowled at that and quickly tied it back at his neck. One last look in the mirror told him that that would have to do. So, grabbing his black scarf with the Slytherin emblem on one end, a gift from Hermione that she had personally knitted, and a handful of Muggle money, he left his rooms.
A short while later he found himself walking rather casually along a busy street in London, gazing at the items in the store windows. He paused outside an old, used and rare books bookstore before going in. He had been here on a couple of occasions in the past and was quite pleased with their selection of muggle literature and even a few chemistry books.
The store was warm and peacefully quiet as he wandered slowly up and down the isles. One book caught his attention and he pulled it down to look at. He heard the soft chime of the bell that hung above the door announcing someone else had entered the store. Severus calculated that that made, including himself and the shopkeeper, six people. He could hear the soft murmur of the newest customer and the shopkeeper talking and he concluded that the new person was a young woman. He let the soft music coming from the speakers drown them out and returned to reading the back of the book in his hand.
"That's a wonderful book, Professor. I, at times, could see the story of The Scarlet Pimpernel paralleling your life."
Severus knew that voice. His head snapped up and around with such a force that he stumbled backwards. Her hands reached out and grabbed his arms to keep him from crashing into the bookshelf behind him.
"Miss Granger!" he gasped his voice strangely hoarse and choked sounding.
She smiled softly at him and nodded. "Yes, that's me. You must not have been expecting to see me here."
"I wasn't expecting to see you at all." Severus swallowed several times and closed his eyes briefly to get his bearings back together. "Where the hell have you been? You have not finished your magical education. Therefore, you should not be out and about like this. Just because you were allowed to use magic in the war does not mean you are a qualified witch. Why have you not returned to Hogwarts?" Severus knew he was not speaking rationally but the shock at seeing her alive and well was not sitting well in his system at the moment.
Her smile faded and she looked away. "I'm afraid I won't be returning. I can't."
"Of course, how could I forget? You're wand was broken during the war so of course you won't have been able to get to Diagon Alley to purchase a new one. Well, if you are free this afternoon, then I shall take you to Ollivander's so that you may…" Severus turned to put the book he had been holding back on the shelf but Hermione's hand on his arm stopped him mid-action and mid-sentence.
"No, Professor, you don't understand. I can not return to the Wizarding world."
Severus stared at her for a long, silent moment. "Explain."
"I…It's a long story to tell, Professor and this is not the place to tell it."
"I have the time to listen. Is there some place we can go to talk?"
"Yes. If…if you wish to make any purchases then I'll let you do so now and wait for you outside." Hermione shifted her purse on her shoulder.
"I don't believe I shall purchase anything today. Come, tell me where we are going and we can Apparate there." Severus took her arm and escorted her out of the shop.
"Um, that's not possible. I don't have an Apparation license," Hermione said with a soft blush. "Anyway, I thought maybe we could go to my flat or we could go get something to eat if you prefer?"
"Is your flat far?" Severus asked looking at her.
"No, it's just a couple of blocks away on Kensington Street."
"Then I would prefer to go there. I am not in the mood to having a bunch of people crowded around me while we have our conversation. You… uh don't live with any one do you?" He shot her a sharp, almost a panicked look.
"No, I live alone." Hermione had a small, almost shy smile upon her lips. Severus felt himself relax upon hearing that.
He let her lead him along the busy streets until they came to a building that was obviously the location of Hermione's flat. She shot him a small look before pulling a key out of her pocket and led him inside.
"It's not much, but its home for me now and it's close to the University," she explained as she led him up a couple flights of stairs to the fourth, and top, floor.
"There are no magical universities, Miss Granger and until you finish your Wizarding education you can not get a job in the Wizarding world," Severus said as if that was obvious.
"I know, but I'm going to a local Muggle university. Look, just come inside and I'll explain everything as best I can," Hermione pleaded.
Severus pressed his lips together and after a second gave a curt nod. He stepped into the flat when Hermione held the door open for him and he found himself in a sparsely furnished though still warmly inviting room. There was a small fireplace in one wall with a doorway off to the right of it and Severus could see a bed and dresser in there indicating it must be Hermione's bedroom. He felt an overwhelming desire to go in there and look around but he held himself in check. Across from the fireplace there was another doorway that led into what appeared to be a small kitchenette. There was also another door that was in the wall connected to the bedroom wall that was obviously a study/library for there were several bookshelves lining the walls and a small roll top desk sat in one of the corners.
Severus stepped further into the main room and looked around. There was a tall armoire in the far right corner that held what he recognized as a television. A window was to the left of the armoire. There was a small four person table in the far left hand corner that was obviously Hermione's kitchen table. There was a large, comfortable looking couch facing the fireplace with an armchair on either side facing each other. A low coffee table was situated in front of all three pieces. A warm coiled rag rug was laid out in front of the fireplace. Several pictures were upon the mantle, all Severus noted, non-magical. He was surprised to see the sketch he had let her have hanging above the fireplace along with several other sketches from various other artists that Severus didn't recognize and assumed must be muggle.
"Would you mind getting a fire started while I get us some tea and something to eat?"
Severus looked at her for a moment before nodding and striding towards the fireplace. Hermione gave him a smile and went into the kitchen. Severus stared at the fireplace and at the logs of wood stacked off to the side. He shot a quick glance towards the kitchen where he could hear Hermione moving about, humming softly to her self. He decided to try the Muggle way. Putting his wand back up his sleeve, he knelt down and piled three logs into the fireplace. Then he rose and looked around for the matches. He found the case sitting off to the side of the mantle. Pulling one out, he struck it, with minimal problems, and was able to light the fire. Several minutes later there was a nice roaring fire crackling cheerfully in the fireplace. Severus smiled to himself, quite pleased with his accomplishment and the smile on Hermione's face when she entered with tea and a couple sandwiches and small tea cakes on a tray made the task even more gratifying.
"Now, I believe you were planning on telling me why you can not return to Hogwarts," Severus said sipping his tea. He closed his eyes in delight; it was perfect.
Hermione shifted nervously next to him and stared into her tea for a moment.
"Could…could you tell me what happened before Harry defeated Lord Voldemort? He…he did defeat him didn't he, that's why you're trying to get me to go back right?"
"Indeed, Miss Granger. I highly doubt I would be doing so otherwise. Had the Dark Lord won, I sincerely doubt I would be here speaking with you much less trying to convince you to return. However, since you asked, what I remember is that you were giving Harry Potter some of you magic and that helped lead to the Dark Lord's downfall. I'm afraid I was busy trying to keep my head attached to my shoulders to take in all of what was completely going on around me."
"All of my magic, Professor." Her voice was soft, nearly a whisper.
"Pardon?"
"I wasn't giving Harry some of my magic. I was giving him all of it. I knew Harry wouldn't have been able to defeat Voldemort alone. He was too drained of his own magic and Voldemort wasn't. So I began to give my magic to Harry. If he needed all of it, then he could have all of it. It was so strange," her voice took on a distant, reflective quality. "It felt like an electric current was traveling through my body and out in a rush and then, suddenly, it was as if a giant ball of something, a part of me, was ripped out forcefully and I had this feeling of emptiness before everything went dark. I woke up in my bedroom at my parents' house. They said I was lying unconscious and in terrible shape out in the front yard. I really believed that the whole fact that I was a witch was just a dream, but seeing you here has proved me otherwise. I can not return to Hogwarts or to the magical world because I have no more magic. I don't know if I would call myself a Squib or if I would say I am now just a Muggle. But either way, I am no longer a witch."
Severus sat staring at her in shocked silence. How could she have done that? How could she have allowed that damn Potter to take all of her magic? Surly he had had enough magic in him to finish the Dark Lord off without having to drain Hermione of her powers? Of course, this did explain why tracking charms hadn't worked. They had all been trying to track her based on her magic but since she didn't have any anymore there wasn't any to track.
"Have you no way of contacting someone from the magical world? Surely you could have sent an owl or used the Floo?" He said softly, disbelief in his words.
Hermione shook her head. "My parents aren't connected to the Floo. They haven't been since the war officially started, it was too risky. I don't have an owl and there's no easy way of getting a hold of one when I'm not in the magical world."
"Then surly Potter should have tried sending you a letter!" His voice began to sound panicked and he wasn't quite sure why.
"Based on your reaction in the bookstore, Professor, Harry, as I'm sure most of the Wizarding world does, believes I'm dead. You didn't even hide your surprise, and dare I say horror, at seeing me alive. I certainly would have acted the same way you had if I had discovered that someone I had previously thought was dead was actually alive and well. Harry would have had no reason to send me a letter."
"Professor Dumbledore sent your parents a letter informing them of your death! Surely they would have told him otherwise."
"He did? I wasn't aware of that." Hermione's eyes narrowed and she looked away. She obviously wasn't pleased with her parents at the moment since they had obviously kept that fact from her. "They always did want me to return to the non-magical world. Especially once they learned about the war."
Severus watched her silently. He felt a surge of anger at Mr. and Mrs. Granger. They had deliberately not told Hermione that her friends believed she was dead when they knew perfectly well that she was alive. They hadn't even bothered to inform Professor Dumbledore that Hermione was alive. Did they really hate the fact that she was a witch that much?
"I will look for a way to retrieve your magic, Miss Granger. Professor Dumbledore and…" he was cut off by her raised hand.
"No, Professor. Thank you but no, I am not going to be returning to the magical world. I don't doubt that there is a way to retrieve lost magic but I gave mine up willingly to help a war. That was my sacrifice and I will not let it have been used in vain. But, um, please inform my friends and the Professors that I am alive and well."
"But…"
"No! I am perfectly happy the way I am now. Should I return to the magical world it will be only for a visit and accompanied by Harry or Ron or one of the others. I am Muggle now, Professor. Please, leave it at that." Her tone was final.
Severus looked away with a frown. He felt like pouting, throwing a tantrum, anything to get her to retrieve her magic and return with him to Hogwarts. He knew it was selfish of him but he wanted her to be near him. He shifted his gaze back to her. She was sitting quietly sipping her tea and looking into the fire. She looked so beautiful with the warm glow of the fire shining off her face and reflecting in her hair. He knew what he was going to do was the epitome of selfishness but at the moment he didn't care. He would not tell anyone he had found her alive and magic less. He would keep her to himself this way and should he ever deem it the right time to inform the others, he would.
"Are you doing anything tomorrow evening?" he asked softly, gripping the tea cup tightly in his hand nervously.
She shot him a surprised look before grinning softly. "No, why? Planning on kidnapping me and dragging me back to Hogwarts?"
"Don't think I'm not tempted. But no, I was actually wondering if you would…that is to say…would you like to join me for dinner? We could…ah, catch up so to speak. I want to know what you have been doing that has caused you to wish to stay here in the Muggle world rather than return to Hogwarts." He forced his grip to loosen on the tea cup before he broke it and further embarrassed himself.
Hermione studied him for a moment, as if searching for something. She must not have found it for she lowered eyes that held a touch of disappointment in their depths and Severus wondered about it "I would enjoy having dinner with you, Professor. You can tell me what has happened these past few months."
Severus gave a curt nod, finished his tea and rose. "Then I will take my leave. I would suggest you wear something nice, but not formal. You may be a former student but that doesn't mean I must spend a fortune on a rather casual dinner." He had hoped to sound almost playful but instead his tone had taken a stiff, formal and almost cold color. He internally winced at it. This was not the way to start a hopeful relationship with her. He saw her back stiffen.
"Well, I certainly wouldn't want to put you out in the streets because I forced you to spend your life savings on a dinner! Maybe it would just be better if we skipped the dinner altogether and I just sent you a letter informing you what I've been doing. If you would be so kind as to send me an owl, I will write off a letter for you."
He found himself fascinated by the way her cinnamon colored eyes flashed in her anger. "That will not be necessary, Miss Granger. I will be here at seven to personally take you to dinner. I have just now found you; I will not be deterred in my efforts to keep you found."
He watched as she gritted her teeth and curled her hands into tight balls as though to keep them from reaching out and strangling him. He smirked at how he was able to rile her up with just a few words and a specific tone. Suddenly, her expression changed and she smiled.
"I'm glad to see you have not let the war affect you too much, Professor. It's nice to know that some things won't change. I will be ready to go at seven."
Severus gapped at her for several moments. She hadn't been serious in her anger? Was he really losing his touch? Was he that easy to read? To manipulate? However, he closed his mouth and brushed imaginary lint off his sleeves with a casual, almost bored air.
"Well, then I shall leave you now and return tomorrow. Until then, Miss Granger." He gave a small bow, took his coat off the coat rack and left.
A/N: Well, this is my second Harry Potter story, well actually it's my first but I waited to post it since I didn't know if I wanted to post it in sections or as one really really long one shot. I hope you enjoy it. Celticreeder.