Note: I own nothing related to Constantine or Hellblazer, etc. Chas drags John shopping for food at a local supermarket. What could happen? OH, YOU'LL SEE! Part Four of Five.

Soupernatural

Aisle Four: Cookies & Baking Supplies

John rushed down the aisle to find Chas digging through the cake-mix boxes.

"And just what," demanded John, "d'you think you're doing?"

"Finding us a cake mix." said Chas happily, holding up a box of mixture. John looked at the label:

Angel Food Cake.

Balthazar burst out laughing. John picked off another box from the shelf and hit the half-demon over the head with it. Then he dropped the box into Balthazar's cart.

Balthazar looked down at it.

Devil's Food Cake.

This brought on another burst of laughter from him, and Chas laughed as well.

John was not impressed.

"Would you two grow up?" he demanded. "It's not that funny!"

"On the contrary, Johnny-boy." said Balthazar, wiping a tear of mirth out of his eye, "it's so very funny!"

Chas backed up a bit. "We need cookies..." and off he went.

John and Balthazar followed him dutifully down the aisle. Soon they came up to a wall of shiny, bright-coloured packages. All kinds of cookies; chocolate chip, pecan crunch, Oreos, Chips Ahoy, tea buscuits, the boxes piled high in every direction.

John tilted his head back. It seemed to go on and on forever...

Chas tugged at his sleeve. "Well?"

"Well what?"

"Well, what kinds should we get?"

John looked down to see Chas rubbing his hands together with a look of insane glee on his face.

"Oh, no. Just one box."

"One?" Chas said weakly.

"One." affirmed John.

Balthazar hummed as he plucked a box of Lemon Digestives off the shelf. Something for his coffee table...

"Fine." Chas huffed. He turned. "Which kind do you like?"

"Just get a box of chocolate chip cookies."

"Which brand?" Chas asked back, gesturing to the dozen-and-a-half different brands of cookies.

"Dear God." John put a hand on his forehead and smoothed back his hair. "Don't take all day, Chas, if you don't know, just pick one at random!"

Chas closed his eyes and put his hand out, grasping for...

"Just let me pick, all right?"

John strode up to the shelf and grabbed the nearest box of cookies. He looked at the box, then put in Chas' cart.

"Are we done now?" John asked, exasperated.

"Not quite yet." Chas noted, pointing at the cashier's box.

"We still have to pay for all of these groceries."

"You mean, you have to pay for all of these - " John looked over at Chas.

Chas had gone completely doe-eyed.

"Oh, no. No, no, no. Don't tell me - " John stuttered.

Chas nodded, turning out his pockets. John could swear a moth fluttered out of one.

"Dammit, Chas..." he sighed. "All right, let's just go."

"I'm finished!" sang Balthazar happily, as he waved to them from the end of the line-up. "Come this way!"

John rolled his eyes and grabbed the cart.

End Part Four

Part Five: The Checkout Counter coming soon!