Sorry bout the not so quick update, school just started up again, ew. Here it is Chapter 4. Hope ya'll like.

Chapter 4

Why

He was sitting across from her, munching down on his hot fudge sundae. He had a drop of fudge on his lower lip and was completely oblivious to it, and Summer was trying her hardest not to crack up. She was almost on the verge of tears. Normally it wouldn't be that funny, but Seth just kept talking about the latest issue of Legion. It wasn't until a waitress walked by and asked Seth if he needed a napkin.

"Sum! What the hell?! How long has it been there?" Seth takes rapidly while wiping at his mouth, but not quite getting it all off. "Did I get it? Is it still there? Did anybody else notice??"

"I don't know, Cohen, I don't have eyes at the back of my head. And no you didn't get it." Summer answered his idotic questions. Still laughing her ass off, of course. He just looked so helpless, desperately trying to wipe the messy dessert topping off, she almost felt sorry for him. Almost.

They had gone to the Crab Shack after the whole Zach debacle. They didn't talk about it, mostly because Summer didn't want to. She was tired of talking about important things, she did that at therapy, right now she wanted to forget about therapy, Zach, her jumbled feelings toward Seth, Marissa, her dad, her stepmother, right now she just wanted to have fun and laugh. Something Seth always knew how to do. That's one reason why.

"So… uh, are you-are you, like, okay?" Seth asked nervously after a few moments of silence. "About, the whole, afternoon thing? I mean, emotionally? And all?"

That was another reason why. He cared if she was okay.

"We… weren't really that serious, you know? He was… he was my-my rebound guy."

Summer answered in a low whispered voice, Seth had to strain to her. He was, no doubtfully, surprised by her answer.

"Oh."

"Yeah."

Now, things were awkward. Damn Zach.

"Are you ok?" Summer asked for the second time that day.

"I believe we went over this. It hurts to speak."

And he was funny, sweet, sensitive, charming, gorgeous, respectable, etc. He was every good thing in the book. He was the perfect guy, and nobody except her knew it.

"Than why are you still talking? 'Cause, god knows, the world would be safer if you wouldn't."

"Oh, oh, buuuurn!" Seth laughed. "Your words are fire! You could break a man with your words!"

"Well, good thing for you, you aren't a man." Summer said stone faced.

"Again! You. Are. On. A. Roll!" He accentuated his words by snapping his fingers after each word.

Summer was lying on her back on her bed, staring up at the ceiling, thinking. Seth had dropped her off about half an hour ago after they had finished their ice creams. She was just replaying the events of today in her mind. She had had so much fun with Cohen, even with the whole Zach thing. He didn't make her feel uncomfortable, he made her feel like… her. Like she was normal, and beautiful, and the most important person in the world. He made her feel those things by just looking at her. By loving her. She knew he loved her, he had only said it once, well not said it, but written it in the note he had left her before he sailed away. She didn't know if she loved him, because she'd never loved anyone, well except for her dad, and he doesn't count. But he made her feel like no one else had.

But he also mad her angry. Pissed. Depressed. Weepy. And Summer Roberts was not weepy. When he left her with that stupid note, she had cried for days and wouldn't come out of her room for weeks. She just didn't understand why he had left her. Was she not good enough? Not pretty enough? Not worth it? Even though the note had reassured her it was none of those things, she still couldn't help but wonder if maybe it had been.

Summer got up from her bed and walked over to her closet, opened the door and walked into the overly large closet which was filled with designer labels, and crouched down in front of a cabinet and opened the bottom drawer, and pulled out a stack of papers. They were all notes from people; Marissa, her dad, her mom, her step-mother, ex-boyfriends, even a few from Luke and Holly. And Seth. There was nothing special about them, some were notes she had passed around with her friends in class over the years, others were just notes around the house left by her dad. But the Seth notes were special, there was 'the' one, and then there were notes from class, which were always a laugh riot. But 'the' note, was crumpled, and almost tearing at some parts from her reading it so often. There was a time over the summer, where she didn't leave the house without, simply because of one line: I love you. It was stupid, but she thought it she had kept it with her he would come back. That was until she broke out of her self deprecating shell and went to one of Holly's infamous parties, where she met Zach. Truth is, she only went out with Zach because, in a way, he reminded her of Seth, he liked comic books and he was cute and funny. But she covered that up by saying he was, like, the 'total anti-Cohen'. It was kind of true though, Zach was boring. Not that funny and not as cute as Cohen. And Cohen knew way more about comic books than Zach did, so, ew.

She hadn't read the letter since he had come back.

Dear Summer,

I don't know how to say this, Sum. I'm leaving. I don't know when or even if I'm going to come back. I am so sorry, Summer. Know that. And as I'm writing this, I have no idea why I'm leaving Newport. Well, that's not true, I do. Before Ryan came I was nobody, you know that. And then suddenly I had a brother and a friend, and then I was getting other friends and then I got you. And now that Ryan's gone, I just know that everything else will disappear too. And I just can't do that again. I can't go through that pain again. You'll realize I'm still a nobody and I always will be a nobody and you'll dump me, and I won't be able to get through that because I love you. I have ever since I first met you, which you probably won't remember, we were in the school playground we were, like, five or something, it was my first day, and you were sitting on a bench and I was on the slide and I looked over towards you and our eyes met and you smiled at me, I smiled back, and in the process forgot that I was on a slide and I, well, I fell off and scraped my knee. Yeah, not my brightest moment. But from that second that you smiled at me? It had always been about you. I love you, Summer, I'm in love with you. Don't get scared, it's not something to be scared about. God, you're the only thing that could make me stay, but I have to go, I have to get away. I'm sorry.

Love,

Seth

She had tears in her eyes. God, I'm so pathetic, she laughed at herself. She was sitting in her closet, partially leaning against her clothes and partially leaning against the wall. She was in a total daze, staring at an invisible mark on the wall. You know when you try to think about nothing, like, absolutely nothing, you can't? And then when you should be thinking about something you aren't? I'm turning into Cohen! With the rambling of the nothing-ness!

Summer hurriedly stood up and walked into her bedroom. Letter still clutched in her hand, she paced her room, wracking her brain, for something, anything to think about!

Seth Cohen was bored. He had been playing Grand Theft Auto San Andres ever since he

had come home after dropping Summer off at her house. Ryan was out, somewhere with Marissa. What the hell was going on with them? What the hell was going on with everybody? Summer and Marissa were fighting. Ryan and Marissa were fighting. He was so out of the loop. And it did not feel cool.

Today, was crazy. His face really did hurt. Zach packed a mean punch. He hoped Summer was really okay. She was a good liar, you know. She's the kind of girl that it's hard to tell if she was okay. But Seth knew she would eventually be okay. But he sooo wanted to kick Zach's ass, but wouldn't because… well, have you seen the guy?! He would so beat Seth into a bloody pulp!

Maybe he'd have Ryan beat him up? God and Moses know, Zach deserves it, after what he said to Summer. Mind you, Seth was just a little bit happy that they were over. Okay, he was really happy they were over. Seth still loved her, never stopped. And now that her boyfriend was now gone, he could step up to the plate. He hoped.

Summer was now taking a shower, relaxing. Sure, people say baths are more relaxing but Summer preferred showers. She was thinking about Seth. Everything he meant to her, everything he'd done for her in the past. He single handedly changed her. She had been this bitch that 'slept around', which was so not true, by the by, but after Seth she changed, she started to care about things other than herself or her popularity status. Then, it hit her. She loved him. She loved Seth Cohen.

Oh, my god, I love him.

Hey! I beat my record! Ok, so some of the stuff in there was kind of cheesy and not that greatly written, but w/e. Hope you guys liked it!