It must have been love but it's over now

It must have been love but I lost it somehow

It must have been love but it's over now

It must have been love, by Roxette.

Gradually the coughing lessened, easing the guilt but strenthening the responsibility to do something. Jet's words of wisdom were always there to lend a helping hand, but it was only a guide and nothing more.

"You can try to love her again; otherwise you have to leave her. If it carries on like this, who knows what tragedy will happen? See Spike, Faye doesn't have the strength to leave you, which is why she followed you here. It's what love does to people."

"Have you ever been in love Jet?" Spike asked in his grainy tone.

"Yeah but...she didn't feel the same. It's a long story." Jet took a sudden interest in the metal flooring.

Spike knew not to pry. He felt so useless, so utterly stupid. At least Faye seemed okay now, she was not coughing up blood anymore. After changing her clothes he tucked her into bed, perching timidly on the edge. What if he had never had a relapse, would things be different then? Of course it would he told himself mentally. He never imagined he could hurt a woman like this. It pained him to even know it was possible. Ed poked her head around the door.

"Will Faye-Faye live Spike?"

The unshed tears in the kid's eyes knocked him for six, and he could only muster a nod.

"You're a mean man, Spike, making Faye-Faye cry for you every night."

It shocked him.

"She does? How do you know?"

"Because I hear and try to make it better but I can't, because I'm not the cause of the pain."

Ed slipped off after that. Checking Faye was fine, he only realised just how beautiful she is, seeing her lay there sleeping. Quietly closing the door behind him, he intended to find Ed and ask her to tell him about him and Faye, in the old days, when a pair of hands massaged his stomach, snaking down to his crotch. She pressed herself against him, so he could feel her breasts on his back.

"Julia!" Spike hissed.

"Awww, spoil sport. You never used to be boring."

"No?"

"No. I can show you what we used to do – if you'll let me." She purred.

Taking his hand, she lead him along the corridor. On the other side of the wall, Faye was leaning against the door listening, and fighting the tears threatening to takeover her life. Crimson droplets created a ruby chandelier of flesh and blood with her hands and nails. Crawling into bed, Faye put the pillow above her head wishing it would suffocate her.

Knowing her luck, Spike would save her life again.

In the dark recesses of the shadows, soft moans were woven with groans amongst the mingling of limbs and clothes strewn across the room. Cascades of golden hair overflowed her bare shoulders, making her look like a goddess. Swapping, he climbed on top of her and marvelled at her perfect naked form. What this woman could do was mind blowing.

So why did he always have thoughts of Faye?

Even now?

He stopped, and Julia wondered what was wrong.

"Don't you like it? We can try something else."

"It's not you. It's...me...I don't know. I'm sorry."

Pulling away he began putting his trousers on. Julia clung to his back, once again pressing herself against him. Prising her off of him, he put on his shirt and buttoned it. Knowing defeat she got dressed herself. When Spike was doing his tie she pulled him close for a kiss; he might not have stopped her, but he did not seem to enjoy it either.

"Is it me?" She said, pouting.

"No...no...I just need to clear my head."

"Can I still see you then?" Julia leaned in, revealing a tantalising glimpse of her assets which would make most men melt.

Spike was not looking at them, he was staring into space.

"We were always so good together, especially in bed." She cooed invitingly.

"So you keep telling me." His reply was neutral.

"Because that's how things stood. You were insatiable Spike Spiegel-"

"Julia."

Silence seeped into the room like deadly smoke, circling around the two like vultures waiting to strike. What was wrong with him? A stunning woman like Julia is interested in him, wants to sleep with him and be with him, and yet he is throwing it to the dogs? Most men would kill to be in his position.

Spike Spiegel is not like most men. He is sincere, kind, loving, a gentlemen, and an excellent fighter when he needs to be.

Or so he is told, various things by various people. One woman claims he is her soul mate; another just wants to get him and keep him in bed; and the only brother he knows, thinks he is worse than a bastard for mistreating the woman who claims they are soul mates.

What is a guy supposed to do?

If only he regained his memory, or better, if he never lost it, then none of this shit would have occurred. Getting to his feet, he held out his hand to help Julia to hers. As if on cue she pretended to trip and fall into him so he was holding her. Moving apart and opening the door, a train of thought crossed his mind. What was it about him that made Spike so appealing to these women? He had little money, owned no property, and was not famous.

Suddenly it hit him like a brick; he would ask Ed. Okay so she is only a thirteen year old girl, but what better then get it from a girl's point of view?

Increasing the pace, he traced the path back to the main hub of the Bebop. He knew Julia would fall behind and then disappear. Upon turning the corridor which looked on to Ed's room, he checked for Julia; nothing. He knew she had left. Attempting to straighten his clothes, he knocked and waited. It creaked ajar.

"Yeeeeeeeeeasssssiiiiiireeeee?" Ed sang, she was wearing her huge goggles.

"Can I come in?"

"Yep yep, yep yep yep!"

Spike sat on a square stool taking centre stage in her room. Ed bounced back in and dived on her bed, arms and legs outstretched. Ein was barking and tried to join in. Unfortunately his short legs prevented him from doing so, and taking pity, Spike helped him to the bed.

"Ed, what do you think of me?"

"Honestly? Tee-hee-hee-HEEEEEEEEE!"

"Er, yeah, honestly."

Ed crawled to the end of the bed, rolled onto her back and hung her head over the edge.

"I used to think you were cool, but now I think you're being mean to Faye-Faye."

"Why does she like me?"

"Why-does-she-like-me-why-does-she-like-me-why-oh-why," Ed sang chirpily.

Spike was seriously considering getting her to a doctor.

"She once said that you were the bet thing that happened to her, that you gave her something to live for. You used to make her laugh all time you knooooooooooooow? You guys were so-so-so-so-sooooooo-oooooooo-o-ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo happy together." Ed half sang.

She waved her limbs about as if they had no bones inside, and every so often she broke into song mid-way through a conversation. Spike briefly wondered if she was dropped on the head as a baby more than once.

"Faye-Faye called you a blessing. You were partners in crime, and you cherished her. Poor Faye-Faye."

"What do you mean, partners in crime? We were criminals?"

"I dunooooooooooooooooooooooooooo Spikester-buddy-oh-pal-oh-mine! Ask Jet. He knows stuff."

More confused than before, Spike left Ed's room and went in search of Jet. As usual, he found him in the main cabin, playing Sedo with himself. Plonking on a chair opposite him, he watched him trying to get out of a rut. Ein was on the table, nudging various pieces to point Jet in the right direction.

Wish you could sort out my life for me Ein.

"Woof!"

Ein scrambled over and licked Spike's nose. Knowing it was pretty useless, however smart the dog was, he patted Ein. Spike thought Julia was not his type; who would choose the kind of woman who will try anything to get you into bed? Initially he only saw her as a slut, and pitied her for it, preferring Faye who as some standards. Something told him she would not stoop so low. Yet now look at him; he's sleeping with Julia because she keeps being 'available'. How weak does that make him look?

Jet noticed his friend slouched over the back of the chair.

"Wanna challenge me?"

"Why not?" Spike drawled in a I'm-not-bothered way.

Faye woke after having 'one of those dreams'; the kind where you're subconscious plays out the dream you have always dreamt, giving you the very things you have always longed for. A feeling of injustice over came Faye, raging through her like a bolt of lightning. While she was asleep, her life was back to how it was, just her and Spike, and no one else. It even got to the stage where Spike proposed to her, in the most romantic ways and in the most romantic places – Ferulucia, the city of love on Venus in the entire galaxy.

All the fantasies she ever had as a child about her wedding day came true. And they were so, so blissfully happy. But then she found a broken clock, and saw all the clogs slowly grinding to a halt before stopping. She remembered someone once telling her, how the brain is like a network of clogs, and how each memory is linked and connected.

It prompted her to wake up, and as much as she hated it, she was crying. It was only a dream. It was not even real. Given the current state of things, Faye could have gladly spent the rest of her life living in that dream.

No, that is just sad, sad and pathetic. Come on; get a grip Faye, as Vicious would say when the going got tough. He always told her she was a fighting spirit, and admired how strong-minded she was. When she did something well, he told her how clever he thought she was, and took the piss whenever it got to her head. Vicious was always there to put her back in line. She could count on him to be there for her. Until she and Spike fell in love, the three of them were a great team. The Red Dragon Syndicate became the most feared gang on Mars thanks to them, and them alone. Although she is still in love with Spike, one thing three years of anguish has taught her; it has taught her to accept the truth, and to move on or waste her life away.

Thinking she had it all, that fortune was for once on her side, was wishful thinking. So much for my happy ending, Faye thought. Since maybe forever, a smile spread on her lips and she stared at the ceiling in her room. She sighed deeply; it was a good dream while it lasted. Now its time to wake up.

Julia can have Spike because Faye does not want him anymore. Though she still cares for him, she is learning to let him go.

"Right, I'll pack, and take my ship to Mars. I haven't seen my father and Vicious for a long while." Faye said to herself.

Spike entered when she had just shut her suitcase. He noticed her wardrobe was near empty, and then the suitcase on her bed. Faye froze; mentally she wanted to keep her new found strength, to be brave enough to walk away. Physically, her body wanted to rip their clothes off and do it right here, right now. With great effort, she won. This time.

The heavy silence wafted in like smoke. The atmosphere was charged with unsaid thoughts, seared by wrong assumptions by what each person can see. Faye thought he had sensed her departure and had finally regained his memory. Spike thought that she wanted to clear out some junk – with a suitcase.

Faye did not turn around, afraid of what might happen if she did. Spike placed a warm hand on her shoulder. She shrugged him off, and hauled the suitcase onto the floor.

When she did look at him, the electricity was still there as their eyes locked. Spike curiously studied her leaf green irises, like she was a puzzle he never quite understood. She in turn searched deep in his umber orbs, seeing her own reflection in them. Faye knew she would not find the answer she is looking for.

"Where are you going?"

"On holiday." She lied.

"You're lying. You're leaving us."

"Then why ask? Surely a smart man can figure it out."

"Why leave? Can't handle the heat?" Spike drawled in a whisper as he took a step closer.

"I handled the heat for three years, thank you very much. It's time I searched for new pastures; this one's starting to smell like shit."

"Ouch. I see you've got you're claws in today." He took another step closer.

"Excuse me Spike, I have somewhere to go."

Faye moved to walk past him but he just blocked her way. By now their faces were centimetres apart. She can feel his hot breath, and knows what is coming next. Putting her hand on his chest, she stops him.

"What are you doing Spike?"

"I don't know. It just feels right. Don't you think so?"

He was too close for comfort .

"I...I...I..."

Spike was moving in for the kiss now.

"...I...did."

At last, Faye found the word she was struggling for. Spike seemed lost, and Faye seized the opportunity to brush past him and through the door way. He simply stood there, rooted to the spot, as the faint whirring of her hovering suitcase receded into the far distance along with the clonking of her heels.

What was he thinking? He had never tried that on in the past. Faye would sometimes forget he had lost his memory and go to kiss him, and he had almost bolted from her in pure panic. The look of shock and horror on his face must have hurt her a lot, he realises that now. In hindsight, maybe he should have been a touch more sensitive. Recently, Faye has not tried to kiss him as often, or talk about their supposed past as a 'couple'. He mentally kicked himself as he thought it. That sounded so cruel, so arrogant. It is a wonder she ever fell for him in the first place.

Not really knowing why, Spike bolted after Faye.

But she already has a head start...

I just had to add some humour in the form of trusty Ed. Can you see what Julia is doing? Yes? No? Well tune in the next chappie to find out!