Sorry if it seems abit short, I'm quite busy with college at the moment but will try my best to update as often as I can.

She's a flower, I can paint her
She's a child of the sun
We're a part of this together
Could never turn around and run
Don't need no fortune teller
To know where my lucky love belongs,
Oh no

Cause it all begins again when it ends
And we're all magic friends

She says: Hello, you fool, I love you!
Come on join the joyride
Join the joyride

Joyride, by Roxette.

',',>

"It's goodbye."

Faye had never looked as certain as when she spoke those words.

"Something I should have said years ago." Faye's voice was assertive, definite.

"I spent the past three years of my life mourning for lost memories. Scrambling to recover what I treasured the most. Do you know what it's like to be forgotten Spike, do you? I can tell you, it's worse than death. To watch the one you love go about their life from day to day, without so much as a kiss, a hug or touch. I know you regard me as a friend Spike, but having crossed that line so many years ago, I just can't. I couldn't go back to being 'friends'. It hurt too much."

'ooh ooh ooh so the years move on

I'll never love the way I loved you

ooh ooh ooh so the years move on

you'll never know the way I loved you…'

The lyrics continued to voice the pain from within Faye, determined the man who caused it shall know and realise it.

Although Faye was standing, willing to maintain eye contact with him, nothing could stop the tears falling from her crystal green eyes. It was taking a lot of effort to hold in the sobs, just like it must have taken a lot of effort to try and try again to get through to him. At last, Spike finally understood Faye.

But the memories were still lost to him.

'ooh ooh ooh so the years move on'

The last words seemed to be sung in sadness, but with new eyes for a new future. It was now or never.

"I had no idea you felt this way… why didn't you try to tell me?"

"I tried Spike! I tried so damn hard to tell you! But you're obviously too dense." More tears fell, and it wrenched Spike inside to see her like this.

"Is that…" He wanted to choose his words carefully.

"Is that why you kept talking about Venus… Paris… and doing all those little…things which you told me…I used to like?"

A wave of relief passed over Faye's smooth face. He saw how it was hurting her, his partial amnesia ripping her to shreds.

Then a steel resolve returned to those green crystal orbs, like someone who has taken a beating but has come back stronger, wiser.

"And why I would often try to kiss you, in the pathetic hope it will bring you back. The truth is, nothing may ever bring you back, at least not to me."

"You're referring to Julia, aren't you?"

Spike noticed the brief flicker of anger in Faye at the mention of her name. Because of his memory loss, he continues to struggle why the two women hate each other so much. He also noticed Vicious's hand on Faye's shoulder, offering moral support. She squeezed it gently in response.

"Yes. But all that is in the past now, where it should be and where it belongs. I don't regret loving you Spike, because you've been so good to me. My only regret, is not having the courage to leave you when I should have done." Her voice was tinged with sadness, her free spirit tainted by pain.

But with a last nod she turned, walked past Vicious and left. Spike shouted after her, as something still puzzles him.

"Why does she hate you?"

It was not the answer he had imagined, or the person he imagined to answer his question. Vicious looked Spike square in the eye, and it was then he knew why Faye chose him. The atmosphere suddenly dropped some thirty degrees. Lead-heavy silence filtered into the kitchen like phantoms. Vicious's peacock eyes met Spike's brown ones with harsh severity, not blinking at all.

"Because Faye has something Julia will never have; men's respect." He said deeply.

Then Vicious went after Faye, and Spike just stood there astounded. It was as clear as day how things are now; she will choose Vicious, knowing he will not hurt her like he has. He saw himself what the guy is like, different to him, but in some aspects probably better. At least he can give her what she wants, his love. Going to the back door, he watched them walking off together. Faye timidly held Vicious by the hand, his huge hand enveloping hers like a glove. He would look at her, and she would smile. Spike knew Vicious will make Faye happy. Spike went to leave via the front door, not wanting to see them but was confronted by Rob and Bryan.

"You're just going to let her go?" Rob asked, crossing his arms over his chest.

"I mean now you know how she feels about you, that's it?"

"I've done enough damage already. It's time she was with someone who makes her happy. I couldn't give her that."

"Why? Because you can't remember? Because you've slept with Julia too often? Don't give me crap!" Rob was angry at Spike for waving the white flag.

"I never saw her as happy as when she was with you! Sure she has dated other men, but I believe you, yes you, were The One for her, and so did she! Not many people are fortunate enough to experience it, and those who do will not feel whole with anyone else. I myself haven't found The One, which doesn't mean Bryan doesn't make me happy, cause he does. I like my life with him. But if I were in Faye's shoes, I'd find it very difficult to love anyone else the way I loved you.

"She can learn to love Vicious, but remember this; he will never be you, Spike. I'll see you to the door."

Rob held the door open for Spike, and he spotted Bryan who simply nodded. He had heard Rob's words of wisdom, and agreed with every bit of it. The world outside was cold and windy, the clouds dark and grey. Then the sunshine peaked from behind the clouds, and golden beams of light fell upon the Marsian city Klubérsia. Spike felt it was unfair, like the sun was poking fun at his misfortune. He had a thousand chances to make it up to Faye, to build another life with her. The more miserable he felt, the sunnier it became. Maybe god did hate him. Only now was he starting to realise how badly he was treating Faye. On countless occasions and numerous times, Spike could have asked her to tell him about what they had so he could understand, and be more sympathetic. Or at least try to comprehend what she was going through. It was true, the pain of being forgotten must be excruciating.

As he walked along the sandy streets of Mars, he studied the people around him. From the beggar sitting on the dirty ground leaning against a wall, shoving his tin can in your face in the hope of a few wulongs to get by with, to the girl selling flowers to passer by's, to the man in a yellow robe smoking a pipe.

"Lost the girl? Never mind eh Spike."

"Is this another riddle Rasheid?"

"Ah, so you remember me. How touching. Pity you don't remember ze girl. Oh well."

"Why do I remember you?"

"Who knows?"

Rasheid was always there when you least expect him.

"I've no energy to play you're games today."

"So you did lose her? Shame. She held a candle for three years for you, now is a little late to say sorry. Here, I've a proposition for you."

He held out a calico cloth tied with rough brown string. Spike took the parcel gingerly; Rasheid is not the type of man you can trust, or distrust. They have strange relationship, as Rasheid often turns up from the blue to help him out every now and then. The mystery is why.

Spike un-wraps the beige material to find a jagged piece of jade in his palm. It was decorative, but what the hell is it meant to be? As if sensing his confusion, Rasheid speaks up.

"It is a fragment. Find the rest, and you shall find you're dream."

Spiegel studies it closely, holding it to the sun; it had engravings on it, and strange patterns and symbols.

"Rashied, what is it meant to be a fragment of anyway?"

Looking around, the pipe smoker was gone. He was a bizarre and shady character, Spike was not sure if he should hold onto this thing or not. Suddenly he felt a pair of hands crawl up his chest and someone breathing on his neck.

"Hello big boy."

"Julia."

"I've missed you. Wanna find a room?"

As she begins to drag him away he wriggles from her grasp, much to her confusion. He has not done that before. Julia knew something was different about him.

"What's wrong?"

"I don't want to talk about it."

"Come one, talking will make you feel better."

"No, I want to be on my own for a bit. I'll see you later."

Hands in his pockets, Spike wandered down the cobbled streets of Klubérsia alone. The multi-coloured stones, despite their various shapes and sizes, all fitted together perfectly, gelled together by the grey cement they were all bound by. Held collectively as one by the smooth bonding stuff. Even stones and pebbles can be side-by-side in harmony, why can't he and Faye be like that? Perhaps if he had tried to understand earlier, he might have saved her a lot of personal anguish.

Staring at the blue sky above, birds flew past over head. A few doves were pecking for food on the ground some ten metres away. They're so pure in colour, symbols of friendship and peace. Its ironic he should see and notice these things after what has happened. Strange, he is starting to feel he has lost something very precious, and very dear. A little girl offers to sell him a single stemmed rose, in the hope of getting money to help her parents feed the family. Spike, in his new found state of awareness, buys the entire basket of long stemmed red roses from her. At first she was scared he belonged to some gang and was going to kill her, and then he reassured her he only wanted the flowers. He went further along the cobbled street, and came across a poor woman looking from stranger to stranger as they passed her, desperate for something to feed her baby. Spike smiled a bit when he saw the cute baby sleeping. He gave her the basket in which she fell to the floor and began bowing to him, kissing his shoes and thanking him. After helping her up and making sure she was all right, he walked away watching her sell the roses and getting the money she so badly needed to feed her child.

It made him feel better to have done something good, especially for complete strangers. Somehow, he just found it difficult to do the same for Faye. He realised he was thinking about her a lot more now than before. When she was constantly saying things or doing things in the hope he would remember, even a sliver or recognition, she never once gave up that hope. Spike sat down on the stone steps leading to a lake, surrounded by maroon mountains. He studied the piece of jagged jade which Rasheid gave him. It was pretty, just like Faye. It enchanted and puzzled him, just like Faye and it had a sharp edge to it, just like Faye. He did not used to think about her so much before, why now? Why can't he get her out of his mind? When he does think about her, it is not like she gives him butterflies in the stomach or anything like that.

Is it Fate? Does he believe in that stuff? Faye obviously did, because how else can someone, anyone, wait three years? And not sway or give up? He respects her for being so strong.

He should leave the Bebop. Or wait and see if she will leave instead. Either way, they should not be living in the same place. Being apart is probably for the best anyway.

He knows that now for certain.

From a distance a pair of blue eyes were watching Spike, wondering what he was thinking and if they were thoughts of her. She knows something must have occurred while she was away. In hindsight, she knew she should not have gone on the latest mission. But when you are with the Red Dragon Syndicate, and are one member of The Bloods, it is not a matter of choice. It is a matter of honour. In this game of life and death, one must fight for what they believe in and for what they want. Julia wants Spike to herself, but cannot shake this gut feeling that someday, he will go back to Faye Valentine. Call it a woman's intuition, call it superstition, call it madness.

Some call it Fate.