Galatea
Fourteenth Movement: We Need to Talk
"Listen. Don't explain or justify."
William Dyer
Daisuke sighed loudly as he reached for the front door handle, already working up in his mind an excuse for his tardy return home. But the door swung open before he could even lay a finger on the doorknob, revealing a glaring Emiko, with Kosuke and Daiki looking on from a safe distance.
"Well? Just what is the meaning of this, Niwa Daisuke? Three hours late from school! Three! You'd better have a good reason—and let me warn you now, unless it had something to do with casing a museum for your next job Monday evening, it's not a good reason." She stepped back to let the boy in, tapping her foot impatiently and hardening her glare.
Daisuke looked away, though by now he was used to the Niwa matriarch's tantrums, and rubbed the back of his head in a nervous gesture. "Well…I—it did have to do with Dark…" He dared a glance up, putting on his best innocent look, "…Does that count?"
Emiko apparently didn't think so. "Living room. Now. I want an explanation, mister. Have you any idea how worried I've been?" She gave him a little shove forward towards the den, throwing her hands in the air melodramatically. "No word at all! Not even a note sent home with With! Now how much trouble would that have been, honestly? A simple note!"
"But—I…" Daisuke paused and plopped down on the couch while his parents and grandfather took the adjacent one. "I guess…I didn't think about that…"
"Apparently so." Emiko pursed her lips in a thin line and reached forward for her cup of tea, still steaming and sitting on the coffee table in front of them. "Please regale us with your thrilling explanation."
Daisuke closed his eyes, already flinching inwardly. "I…umm, I…transformed. At school. In…in front of everyone…"
Emiko's tea was gone. And now the carpet was ruined, as she'd dropped her cup and spit out the bit she'd already sipped.
"Y—you what!"
"But—but Hiwatari-kun did too! Well, halfway, kinda…I had to go all the way, and it was kinda his fault—"
"HE WHAT!"
"No—no, listen, Mom!" He ran a hand through his hair, ruffling it in frustration, "I took care of it! Dark just…erased everyone's memories."
"Oh well that makes me feel much better!" the woman huffed, turning to look at her husband and father, who'd been baffled into silence. "Well say something, won't you two!"
"Daisuke…" Daiki shook his head, unsure of how to proceed.
"Daisuke…" Kosuke was a perfect mirror to his father-in-law.
"TOWA! MORE TEA!" Emiko began massaging her temples. "F—fine…why don't you just…start at the beginning…"
The boy gave a firm nod, then plunged into a thorough description of the recent events, starting with the previous night's reconnaissance at the museum and leading all the way up to their encounter in the janitor's office near the school roof.
His mother was now beside herself. "I just can't believe that things have gotten this bad with that boy—and you! Kosuke-san! I can't believe you gave him Redival!"
"Redi-what?" Daisuke echoed.
"That ring! Rutile's companion piece!" She shook her head in disbelief, still frowning at her husband. "I know you meant well, but now look what's happened!"
Kosuke ducked his head in embarrassment. "Well…I do admit, it was my intention to separate the two, give them some time apart…not to bring them closer…"
"I should hope so!"
"I'm surprised it even worked," Daiki added, scratching his beard in thought. "We haven't used one of the sealing pieces in nearly a hundred years. It must've been at least two or three incarnations ago, if not more. Guess that goes to show you we Niwas are still a match for those Hikaris. Sad to see one like Redival go to such a waste…"
"Well, it did work," Kosuke returned, "so that means if anyone's at fault for today's events…it would be me."
"But…" Daisuke jumped in, curious now that the yelling had subsided, "What exactly does it do? That…Redouble."
"Redival," his father gently corrected, "And I believe you saw what it did. I gave it to Satoshi-kun a little over a month ago, after his father's funeral. It was actually in that letter I asked you to deliver to him." Daisuke gave a small nod; he remembered it now. "I knew that he'd been having…well, turmoil with his curse—" what an understatement, "—and I just…wanted to give him a little break. I'd intended him to use it to kind of…let himself go, just once. Not to worry about transforming or hurting anyone, to be able to keep his mind, if not his body. I felt that that fact alone—that he could hold on to himself if he tried—would give him the strength to keep fighting, knowing that he could beat Krad some day.
"I never thought…he'd use it like this…" He turned his gaze to his son. "And…you say it was completely voluntary?"
Daisuke nodded, "He told me so himself; and it's not like he'd have any reason to lie." Frowning, he added, "And I know he's telling the truth anyway; he's been getting awfully close to Krad lately…figures something like this would happen."
Daiki leaned his head back, resting his tired eyes, "My my…it seems this incarnation is just full of problems. We never had incidents like this back in my day." Daisuke turned to stare at his grandfather, eyes wondering. "Of course, I didn't have Krad to contend with, so maybe I wasn't as good as I thought. But I reckoned Dark and I were a pretty good pair."
'Damn straight, old man,' the thief added silently, and Daisuke smiled.
'I hope you and I can still be friends if I have a son and you come to him,' the boy returned.
'Course we will be,' Dark assured him, though the thought of how messed up the next Niwa might be if he had Daisuke and Riku as parents sent a slight shiver down his spine. 'We'll always be…friends.'
'…What do you mean what do I think about all this?'
Daisuke sighed, defeated, and hung his head from his spot on his bed. After the discussion with his parents and grandfather, he'd come upstairs to his room to sulk. "This! This whole situation—with Hiwatari-kun and Krad! Don't tell me you just sit up in my head and sleep all day; I know you've got some kind of opinion on what's—what's going on between them…" He dared an upward glance at his curse, whose image sat cross-legged across from him at the foot of his bed.
Dark stared straight at him with a serious mien that rarely crossed the thief's features, and his host half-regretted asking the question. "I—just…I mean…if you don't feel like tal—"
'Answer me a question, Dai,' Dark pressed, leaning forward, '…Would you have ever…ever considered doing … something like that?'
"Something…like…?"
'The ring, Daisuke. Using it—on me. Using it to take on my for—'"No!" the redhead fired back almost immediately, and Dark jerked away instinctively, sending an embarrassed flush across his Tamer's features, "I—I mean…sorry…" He hung his head even lower now, "I just couldn't believe you would ask me something like that…"
'Why shouldn't I want to know?'"Because! You should already know!" From the confused look on his curse's visage, Daisuke could tell he'd have to give his explanation—one he wasn't all that comfortable with divulging. "I would never…never want to use you like that—it would just be…wrong!"
'Wrong?' Dark parroted, hurt leaking into his mental voice, 'But—if it was mutual—'
Daisuke shook his head vehemently, "No! It's still wrong! You should never let yourself be used that way! There's no point to it! Why would anyone—"
'Trust, Dai.' The boy froze, eyebrows drawing together in concern, 'That's why. It's all about trust. Trust from the curse to the Tamer, just—symbolic, I guess. I mean—' He ducked his head, dodging his host's curious stare, 'If…if you had had a ring like that, or if you had the chance…I'd let you, y'know…be me.'
Gulping thickly, Daisuke felt his stomach churn guiltily—he'd just implied that Dark was an idiot for wanting to trust him. But—was he? Was he really worthy of the trust of the being he was physically closest to?
'I don't know what went on with those two,' he continued, either unaware of or ignoring Daisuke's thoughts, 'But if you wanted to…I'd let you.' When Daisuke still gave no response, he tried to strengthen his argument by playing up the ritual itself, 'I mean—didn't you see what it was like for that Hiwatari? Didn't you even…wonder what it would be like?' He desperately wanted to hear his host's thoughts on the subject now, and he wasn't even really sure why.
What did he care if Daisuke was inherently wary of a curse/host relationship beyond simply curse/host? Well? What should it matter to him if his own host broke apart any bonds that might have formed between the Hikari heir and his curse—simply because Daisuke was prejudiced to that sort of relationship between a Tamer and Tamed?
It wasn't like Dark wanted to see if a curse and host could fit like that—it wasn't! He just…
"It's not that—that I didn't want to, really," came a small voice from across the bed, "Just…it'd be wrong," he repeated once more. "You—you'd trust me like that, with your body, and I appreciate it! I do, but—I don't think…that I could…handle it. You trusting me that much." He began to fiddle with a stray string coming loose from his comforter. "What if—what if something went wrong, or I…got you hurt? Or caught? You're a much better kaitou than I could ever be—" Dark didn't even attempt to refute him, "—and, just…I couldn't take knowing that just because I wanted to try something like that, I got you in any trouble…
"You're not…a curse. Not to me—no matter what Hiwatari-kun says! You're not even just a spirit who shares my mind…you're real! You're…you're another person, with thoughts and feelings—feelings I…don't want to risk hurting by asking for something as serious as…as relinquishing complete control over your body…"
Dark was speechless for a moment, stunned into silence by his host's all-too-endearing reasoning for turning down his offer. Hastily, though, he put his normal happy-go-lucky façade back up and cracked a grin, 'Na, Daisuke…' He leaned forward, smiling softly, 'Did I ever tell you that you were my favorite host?' A burst of red spread over the boy's face, and Dark couldn't help laughing.
Daisuke fumed silently for a moment, letting his blush die away, before pressing again, "You still haven't answered my question though." At Dark's questioning glance, he clarified, "About Hiwatari-kun and Krad!"
Sighing, Dark finally broke down and decided he had to give his host a straight answer. 'Look, all I'm trying to say, Dai, is…just, isn't it getting old? Can't you just…let them be?' The look in the boy's eye was quick to let him know he would not just "let them be." 'Alright, alright, I get it—Krad's a bastard and Hiwatari's been through enough hell without having to be manipulated even more just 'cause you dumped him and he had no one else to tur—'
"You're making it sound like this is all my fault," Daisuke grumbled, glaring at his curse.
'Well?' Dark cocked an eyebrow, and the boy looked away, pouting. 'You wanna know what I think?' Daisuke turned back now, and the thief made sure to carefully choose his words, weaving them into conversation that he hoped wouldn't render him too transparent, 'I think…that you're really wary of this…thing, whatever it is, that's going on between a guy you view as a good friend and another you view as your and my worst enemy.' At seeing the boy's attempt to interrupt here, he quickly assuaged him with, 'And you're right to be—I'm not defending them…per se. It's just, you're kind of…' He hesitated a moment, and had to be prodded to continue.
'…Well, you're kind of—you're just a little—hell, you're the nosiest Niwa I've ever had the pleasure of cursing.'
Red eyes blinked stupidly. "I'm…what!"
'You're nosy, Dai!' the thief repeated, though his voice had taken on an almost pitifully pleading tone, as if he was begging his Tamer not to shoot the messenger, 'Those two—I've never bothered the Hikari host/curse relationship, and they never bother me in my relationships with my hosts! It's not our place!'
"But—!"
'I know you're worried about him, and I know you love him as a friend and don't want him getting hurt, but…there're these unwritten rules, see…'
"Screw the rules!" Daisuke snapped, "This isn't some stupid game, Dark! You and Krad may have gotten bored over the years and made up some secret code that you two abide by, but I'm not gonna sit here and let that—that demon deceive the closest thing I ever had to a real friend into thinking that he actually cares!"
Dark flinched inwardly at Hiwatari being the closest thing his host had ever had to a friend. If that was so—then what was Dark himself?
"If you really understood whatever's going on between them, you wouldn't be so quick to just give up and let them be! You'd be helping me think of how to get Hiwatari-kun back to his senses."
The cold glare that fell upon Dark from his host was almost physically painful, and the thief desperately wanted to retreat into his corner of the boy's consciousness and flee from any further harsh words being flung upon him. He wasn't used to arguing like this with his Tamer.
Sure, they had their little spats, hardly ever anything of a serious nature. Dark would tease Daisuke about taking his relationship with Riku beyond simple blushes and kisses on the cheek, and the boy would respond with a scathing lecture which would simply roll off the thief's back. Then Daisuke would don his "high and mighty" mental smirk whenever Dark got caught off guard by Krad on a night they had a job—after, of course, giving his curse a sound reaming. Such was their life together.
But delving into such topics as incarnations past with the boy…was a strain on their relationship. Daisuke just couldn't understand how he and Krad interacted over the years. The fine lines neither one crossed. How Krad loved his Hikaris and Dark his Niwas, how those Tamers could never—never learn of these feelings, as it would be folly for all involved, a broken road of heartache.
Though…hadn't Krad himself broken the rules this time round? It helped that the blonde's own Tamer seemed to hate him, spurning the frustratingly frequent, 'You are mine and mine alone, Satoshi-sama's and 'Have you any idea the passion you stoke in me, Satoshi-sama?'s. Nevertheless, Dark was growing increasingly restless…Krad knew how this would end, and yet he continued the fool's errand of chasing after his Tamer. Even Dark wasn't that stupid—when one was a bloodline curse such as they, one learned a great deal about keeping true feelings hidden from the prying eyes of the little boys they possessed.
Whatever the reason…if Krad had cheated, had thrown away their carefully erected set of rules…what did that mean for Dark himself? He didn't want to throw them away—he basked in the protection of boundaries he mustn't cross to keep himself, in heart and soul, safe.
It was a cold, taunting freedom he was faced with now. He could join Daisuke and show Krad the error of his ways—show him that you cannot be allowed happiness as a bloodline curse, that you yourself are cursed in that way. Stomp all over the bud of whatever was happening between Hiwatari and the blonde…and thus stomp all over Dark's own feelings…
Or he could confront that coldness, rush headlong into the biting wind and—
And utterly lay waste to his bond with his own Tamer.
'…You're right, Dai…so maybe that just means I don't really understand what's going on between those two. I never claimed to know, not for sure—just…tried my best to project on them.' He sighed softly and looked right into his host's confused stare—Daisuke obviously hadn't expected Dark to agree so compliantly with him.
'Would you mind…thinking about one thing for me, though?' The red eyes didn't move their gaze. 'If…if it wasn't Hiwatari and Krad…if it was someone else…do you think you'd still be interfering like this?'"…'Someone else'? I don't—"
'Let me put it this way… Would you want Hiwatari interfering…if it were you and me?'
It was another full minute before the shock of Dark's question wore off enough to where Daisuke actually found the strength to even contemplate responding, at which point he plunged into a flood of babbling nonsense about how the two of them weren't like that, in case Dark hadn't noticed, and what in the world did that have to do with Hiwatari-kun and Krad and was Dark even listening anymore?
No, Dark wasn't.
It was the furthest he could let himself tread; any more and he'd risk toppling the card-house relationship he'd erected with the boy. He abandoned the astral form he'd used while conversing with Daisuke, plunging the room into blackness once more and leaving his Tamer calling futilely for him. Retreating into his little corner of his host's mind, he curled into a ball of thought and brooded.
He hadn't really expected anything to come of the simple question—not seriously. But it was the closest he could come, short of outright confessing, to getting Daisuke's opinion on…well, on certain subjects involving a curse and his host. The closest he could come to discerning if it was just the fact that the curse was Krad and the host Hiwatari that drove the boy to such lengths to try and separate them.
…Why oh why did his Tamer have to…care so much? Why did he have to be so sensitive? This was the Hikari clan they were talking about! Anything that made Dark's job easier was supposed to be a good thing!
It was very difficult, though, for Dark to convince himself that he should be angry with his host for such feelings. In truth, he was deeply moved by them, admiring them from afar with an emotion just shy of jealousy. Daisuke didn't want to hurt anyone, friend or foe. At times, the thief found this quite frustrating, particularly in a battle situation when Dark came upon a perfect opportunity to kick Satoshi while he was down. It was always, "No! We can't do something like that to Hiwatari-kun!" or "That's just not fair—don't do that, Dark!" Just when he'd gotten the Hikari host right where he'd wanted him…Daisuke had to go and spoil his fun.
In the black and white feud between the Niwas and Hikaris…his host was shades of gray. Daisuke didn't seem capable of making up his mind…and some day it would invariably hurt him.
The boy was too complex, such a veritable maze of emotions! He loved Riku, and was—still?—friends with Hiwatari. Yet despite being confessed to by Satoshi, he turned down that same love he'd already given to the elder Harada twin, hoping instead to keep the friendship he'd developed with the Hikari boy. Daisuke didn't want to hate or be hated; didn't want to be too near, and yet couldn't help being near—
Great, now Dark had a headache from trying to psychoanalyze the kid. Doubtless, Daisuke was feeling it as well and pondering its source.
Dark sighed, frustrated. Couldn't his Tamer just love one person? Couldn't he be close to just one person?
Dark could. And did. That was all he ever did: each incarnation he bonded with his host, through their minds, through the very fibers of their being, in ways that Synchronization couldn't even begin to mirror. Bonded with his precious Niwas, forgetting all others. He might occasionally be distracted by a pretty face—let it never be said that Kaitou Dark wasn't one to appreciate a nice figure—but he would always return to the side of the one he served first, for no one was as close to him as his Tamer.
As a bloodline curse, without true form…he was ingrained with the base desire to be important…to someone. And it just felt better when it was to the person with whom he was most closely bonded.
Daisuke couldn't understand, of course—and Dark didn't blame him. The boy was a human, despite any trace magic that might flow in his Niwa blood. When all was stripped away, he was real and Dark was not; he could afford to stretch himself thin, spread his love around, and Dark could not.
He could look at Hiwatari's and Krad's relationship with contempt, could try and break it, could yell and rage on about Hiwatari falling into the blonde's trap.
And Dark…could not.
It was barely 7:00 when Satoshi wearily climbed the stairs back up to his apartment and fumbled for the keys in his pocket, glad for once that he'd just shoved them in his pocket and hadn't left them in his bag, which was still at school. Despite it being so early in the evening, the events of the day had worn him out, sapping whatever energy the ring had left him with, then drawing on his own reserves. Rubbing the back of his neck to try and release a bit of the tension, he hissed in pain as he reached a bit too close to one of his shoulder blades.
First things first: inspect the damage. If how he felt on this side was any reflection of what his back looked like…it wasn't going to be pretty. He padded slowly into the bathroom after removing his shoes at the door, and flinched as he tried to gently remove his button-up shirt.
Once inside, he flicked on the light and let the material fall to the floor, not bothering to toss it into the clothes hamper. Instead, he edged back-first in front of the tall mirror, and craned his neck to peer over his shoulder at his reflection.
As expected, he wasn't happy with the sight—and neither, apparently, was Krad, who slipped into astral form with a quiet gasp, face contorted in horror as he held himself back from reaching out to touch the wounds.
His back looked like some mad calligraphy artist had snatched up a butcher knife and carved hedonistic symbols into his skin, using black blood as his ink. Alien symbols wound up around his shoulder blades, slid down his backbone, teased the nape of his neck, and dared to assault his lumbar region with tendrils of black flame—all a dark reminder of the afternoon's happenings.
"So?" he huffed after a few minutes of silently assessing the damage, tentatively fingering one tendril that reached up to his neck, "…Why did they come out?"
Biting his lip and not entirely sure if he would be yelled at again, Krad hesitantly offered the best reply he could at this point in time, 'I think…it was the Synchronization…'
Satoshi's eyes shot open, fully alert now, and he swiveled his head around quickly to stare his curse in the face, voice hoarse with shock, "What?" Krad turned his own gaze away, "You told me it was temporary! That when the ring wore off—"
'And it was, Satoshi-sama—can't you feel it? It's different now than when you were in my body.'
Clamping down on another bout of yelling he wanted to unleash, Satoshi forced himself to acknowledge that the blonde was partially right—it was different from the night before. He no longer had the unlimited access to Krad's mind like then, had to ask for knowledge he wanted, could have it denied him. "Well—I… Yeah… So what was it then? How was it part of the synch?"
Krad sighed, 'I've never done a synchronization like that with a host…Never a mutual one. It had always been…for me to gain access to their powers, or knowledge they'd forgotten but still kept locked in their minds… Last night was different, so I'm not all that surprised that the aftereffects are different as well.' He moved around to Satoshi's side, edging a bit closer to get a better look at the tattoo-like astral scars the wings had left behind. 'Even after the ring's effects had worn off…part of you still retained delicate ties to my powers—specifically, my ties to the Astral. It must have sensed you preparing to fight, and so it…it sent you what would most aid me in a fight: my wings.'
Satoshi's eyes fell away, and he turned back to look at the tattoos covering his back now, "…Then what are these?"
'Astral markers…physical evidence that you are a channel, that you've touched the Astral. They will fade in a few hours, and you'll never see them again.' He paused and added, 'They appeared on me the first time I used Astral, when I was…created. My hands…' He held them up and looked at them with a strange mixed expression of nostalgia and grief, 'It was horrible—I'd thought that something had gone horribly wrong… Stained with black blood I knew not to be mine or Dark's…I couldn't touch anything, couldn't wash it off, and nearly frightened that first Hikari child to death…'
Turning away from the mirror, he regarded his curse, still a bit confused, "Your hands, though…that's different from me… Why is it on my back?"
'The markers appear wherever you funnel the Astral—I had fired an astral energy sphere at Dark that time, so my hands were stained with the markings. You…you, a human, bent the Astral to your will in the form of my wings. So your markers are on your back.'
Satoshi bent down to pick up the shirt he'd tossed aside a moment ago, hissing as the skin across his back stretched and pulled. He flung the garment into the clothes hamper and padded back into his room, not bothering to put anything else on
Krad stopped in the doorway, looking on as his host fumbled around in his closet for a pair of sleep pants, and softly spoke into the darkness, '…I'm sorry, Satoshi-sama…'
The boy didn't show any sign of hearing him except for returning from inside the closet, "And what are you sorry for this time?"
Frowning, the blonde continued, 'My powers…you used them…and they hurt you.' He paused and added, 'If I'd known something like this might happen, I never would have suggested the synchronization, or even using that ring in the first pla—'
"Shut up, Krad." It wasn't a harsh order, more like Satoshi was simply getting tired of the apology. He pulled his upper half out of the closet again, a pair of thin pajama bottoms in his hands, and the blonde turned away, rustling clothes soon filling the silence. "If I hadn't wanted to do all that with you…I wouldn't have. I've told you before you can't force me to do anything, so stop babbling about how just because you suggested it, that everything that happened at school was your fault." The rustling stopped, and Krad turned back around, confronted with the Hikari boy's cold stare. "If you're trying to get me to forgive you—forget it." He flinched inwardly at the harshness conveyed in his voice, and added to soften the statement, "…You didn't do anything wrong, anyway."
'But—!' Krad objected, 'That whole incident was because you were still tied into my powers!'
Satoshi stormed over to the bed and plopped down, still glaring at his curse who stepped further into the room, "And if I hadn't been tied into your powers last night, I couldn't have done any of the stuff I did! Either way, in the end it was my choice—my fault. Using the Astral, using your body…it more than made up for nearly transforming at school…"
Krad frowned, brows furrowing in disapproval. '…But it still hurt, didn't it?'
Sliding down and pulling back the coverlet, Satoshi slowly maneuvered his bottom half under the covers, being sure not to let his back rub too harshly against the sheets.
"…I've felt it before."
Krad felt as if he'd just been drenched in a bucket of ice cold water, feeling the chilly tendrils of memories wrap themselves around his mind, reminding him just how different their relationship was now than it had been before—and just how easily it could snap back to the never-ending cycle of hate.
He felt another apology already perched on his lips, before his Tamer shot stormy blue eyes his way and continued, "I've felt it before—so I know it hurts, I already do. I knew it when I used your body last night—I knew it even as you were suggesting it, I knew it even when Kosuke gave me that ring—I knew it. And I didn't care, don't you see?
"I chose to use that ring, I chose to test your powers, without the solid knowledge that even that numbing spell would work, because I wanted to!" His voice got a bit more frantic, and he clenched his fists in the bedsheets, "You—you trusted me with your body, when I could've done so much to hurt you! The synchronization, even—even then I could've hurt you without damage reflecting on me!
"The point is it was my choice to use those powers and to take whatever consequences came with them—whether I knew about them or not. Those wings were my fault, so just—stop your damn apologizing! I've done enough of it today for the both of us!" In a huff, he quickly slipped under the covers, biting his lip to the point of drawing blood to keep from crying out at the pain, eyes shut tight.
Krad could only stare down at the boy's back turned to him, frowning—he was more than a little fed up now. 'I can't do anything to please you, can I?' he snapped bitterly, 'You yell at me when I don't take responsibility and you yell at me when I do!'
The back, of course, provided no response. '…That Niwa boy shouldn't have pushed you so far anyway—it's his fault for getting you so angry in the first place.' He paused again to see if he would be returned any sort of reply this time, waiting silently in the dark as the boy's breathing became more and more even.
After a few moments, though, his waiting was rewarded with a soft, muffled answer, "…For whose sake do you think I yelled at him…?"
Krad blinked a few times, quite confused. What was Satoshi-sama implying? 'But…well, the Wing Master…he was pestering you about last night…' A pause as he tested a theory, 'Weren't you just angry that he was doing that again? After all, like you said—it was your choice to use my powers, so he had no business chiding you for it…right?'
Satoshi lifted his head and propped himself up with his elbows behind him, staring incredulously at his curse, then rolled his eyes and slid back down onto the pillow, blushing violently. "Idiot…"
'…Satoshi-sama?'
"I'm tired. Just…go to sleep, Krad…forget it. And no more apologizing—you finally seem to have gotten it through your head that I wanted to use that thing in the end, so…so I ap—appreciate that you didn't want to…to hurt me with it…" He swallowed a lump that was forming in his throat, "But the fun I had from using the ring outweighed the pain of my fight with Niwa."
A relieved smile spread across Krad's features, and he slowly faded from sight, plunging the already-dim room into darkness. However, he didn't miss the final words from Satoshi's lips:
"…And—even if I had the chance…I wouldn't have changed anything that happened…"
Satoshi took the opportunity the following morning, as it was a Sunday and thus not a school day, to catch up on all the sleep he'd missed since…forever.
Apparently whatever magic had worked its way into his body via Niwa Kosuke's ring had completely sapped his energy when it had forced wings upon his back, and the boy rose, bleary-eyed and yawning deeply, some time well into the afternoon—not of his own volition.
Fumbling around on the bedside table for a moment, he finally came across the phone, ringing shrilly, and raised it to his ear, eyes still blinking the sleep away. Clearing his throat and making every effort not to sound as if he'd just woken up, he spoke calmly, "This is Hiwatari," and waited for a response.
"Satoshi-kun," was the ever-neutral voice on the other end. Not falsely cheerful, not overly serious—Niwa Kosuke had a strange ability to completely mask his emotions to any listener, an ability Satoshi had once prided himself on being able to exhibit through his face. "…Did I wake you?"
Daring a glance at his clock—1:14 in the afternoon—Satoshi lied, "Of course not, Kosuke-sa—ah…Kosuke…" He suddenly remembered the man preferring he drop the honorific—quite a strange request from an elder to a child, but then, maybe he'd been out of Japan studying artworks for so long that he'd grown accustomed to being addressed in such a way. Satoshi fumbled around for some excuse, failed, and instead changed the subject, "Was there something I could help you with?" 'Please don't ask about yesterday… Please don't ask about yesterday…' he silently prayed.
"Actually…there is. I was wondering if you and I might be able to talk." Satoshi closed his eyes slowly and cursed mentally. "If you've already got plans, then…"
It wasn't that Satoshi didn't want to talk to Kosuke—far from it. The Niwa man, strangely enough, was the one he was most comfortable speaking with, in both Hikari and Niwa clans. Absurd, as he wasn't even a legitimate member of either. He had an air about him, though, that drew one to confess all their problems to him, and he made one feel as if he could alleviate them all.
But he was already confused enough about the previous days events, and he really didn't want to discuss it, for then he would have to explain the business that led to it in the first place—his outing in Krad's body. He didn't need another Niwa giving him grief about his relationship with his curse.
In the end, though, he prided himself on being a consummate gentleman, and acquiesced. "No—no, it's no trouble at all." Sighing softly, he added, "When would be good for you?"
Satoshi was just straightening his shirt and casting a final glance around the living room to be sure it was suitable for guests when there was a knock at the door. He hurried over to the door in socked feet and pulled it open to let Kosuke in. The Niwa man pardoned his intrusion and slipped off his shoes, following Satoshi into the living room area and taking the proffered seat on the couch with the boy on a seat diagonal from him.
Kosuke cast a glance around the room, frowning mentally at the state—it was almost…too clean. So austere, cold, and empty, like a mirror reflecting its owner. He almost preferred the messy state of his own son's room; it let him know that it was lived in, enjoyed. This place almost felt…like a prison. He shuddered internally; as if the Hikari child needed another prison outside his own mind.
A moment passed by in silence, until Kosuke finally decided to start up a conversation—it had been he who'd planned this in the first place. "So…Satoshi-kun…how's—" He swallowed nervously, flying blindly, "—how's school been going lately? I understand you're taking on a few more tutoring charges, from what Daisuke sa—"
"I know you're here to talk about yesterday's incident," Satoshi interrupted quickly, staring down at the floor in shame, "And I've already apologized to you and your family for such an imposition. I realize Niwa-kun had no reason to help me when he did and for that I thank you all. But please don't beat around the bush—I…I don't like being patronized."
Kosuke blinked a few times at the boy, a bit surprised at such a forthright attitude. "Satoshi-kun, I didn't mean to—"
"Your question?" He couldn't help replacing Kosuke's concerned features with those of his son, and was growing increasingly frustrated at the intrusion upon his privacy.
The man frowned at him, "I didn't come here to patronize you—I don't know what your feelings towards my son may be now, that you are this hostile towards me, but I assure you my intention isn't to demean you."
Satoshi flushed, angry with himself now, and muttered a quick apology, "I—s-sorry, I just…"
Kosuke reached over and lay a hand gently on his shoulder, smiling warmly, "Think nothing of it. That's the reason I came over in the first place."
Sighing, the boy queried softly, "…You still want to talk about yesterday, though, don't you…?"
"You apologized, Satoshi-kun. And I heard from Daisuke the full details of what happened—that he and you had an argument, and that…that Krad objected to this and tried to manife—"
"He did not try to manifest!" the boy snapped, jumping to his feet, eyes flashing, "That was—that had nothing to do with him!" Kosuke sat back, taken by surprise at the outburst, and Satoshi apparently realized he'd been a bit forceful in his declaration. He quickly forced himself to sit back down and went back to staring at the floor. "Forgive my outburst… But that's not what happened… Niwa's making excuses for situations he doesn't understand again."
Smiling faintly, Kosuke prodded, "Then…why don't you tell me what happened? Apparently I've been misinformed—though I'm sure Daisuke didn't mean it wrongly." Satoshi refrained from commenting, though he had a string of harsh retorts he longed to unleash. "What exactly happened yesterday?"
Surprisingly, Satoshi was now more at ease—wanted to explain the events of the past couple of days in detail, just to make Kosuke understand exactly what was going on between himself, Krad, and Daisuke. Strange, though, that all it had taken to make him jump on the offensive had been the implication that his curse had played a part in the fiasco…
He shook his head to clear it of such compromising thoughts and plunged into an explanation. "It…started Friday evening. Krad asked me if I was getting bored or was angry with how he was handling Dark because I'd become quiet on advance notice nights, and I told him it was because I didn't have any reason to look over his shoulder all the time now because I tr—" A light blush tinted his cheeks, the source of which he couldn't trace, "—trusted him to keep our agreement—oh." He paused and looked up at Kosuke, "You don't know about the agreement, I suppose. That I would let him out to—"
"Actually I do," the man returned with a smile. "Daisuke was kind enough to vent the details to me some time back."
"Oh…" This threw Satoshi—just how much had Niwa spoken to Kosuke about? And did he have the correct facts, or just the ones Niwa chose to divulge? Deciding to clarify the matter later, he continued. "Krad said he wanted…to repay my trust by giving me some of his own…and so he let me use his body for the night—" A brilliant tomato-red hue spilled across his cheeks at the innuendo, "I mean—! The ring! The ring you gave me so that he couldn't take over! I used that to be in his bo—his form." His eyes fell away, "…He let me…"
A sigh, and he continued, gathering his thoughts. "He let me take over his form with the ring you gave me at the funeral…because he wanted me to understand what it felt like to be him. I saw no harm in it, so I agreed. But it was…difficult and time consuming to learn how to use his body, so I…we…" He swallowed a lump that had formed in his throat, wary of how best to explain the situation to Kosuke.
"…Don't tell me you…synchronized with your curse?" Satoshi's eyes darted up to meet Kosuke's, confusion evident.
"How did you…?"
Kosuke hung his head low and sighed, "Satoshi-kun, do you have any idea how dangerous that was! You two could have been bonded forever—and I don't mean as you are now. More—more intimately—through the very fibers that separate your minds!" He brought his hands over to clasp the boy's shoulders. "You could have lost yourself! Surely…surely he knew that—why would he even suggest such a thing!"
'Of course I knew it, stupid human!' Krad snapped, phasing into existence, though Kosuke could neither see nor hear him and thus gave no response. 'But I've been doing this for centuries and I fully understand the risks! I made Satoshi-sama aware of them as well, and—'
"Shut up," Satoshi hissed under his breath, shooting a glare at the blonde standing in the middle of the room.
Kosuke misinterpreted the subject of the order, and blinked, concerned, before querying, "Excuse me?"
Shaking his head and waving him off, Satoshi apologized quickly, "Nothing—nothing. Just…he doesn't quite agree with your opinions on the danger of synchronization… He says that he knew the risks and informed me of them, so there was little that could be done to make it any safer…"
"And…do you understand the risks?" A swift nod—oh he understood them quite well, for he'd just come off the wrong end of what could go wrong when one partner retained ties to the other's powers. "Then…why would you agree to such a thing?" A pause, "…Did using my ring with him…mean that much to you?"
Satoshi balked, thoughts flitting around inside his head like mad, and Krad, too, stopped his mental ranting against the Niwa patriarch to stare at his host, not having really considered such a possibility. Had he, perhaps, pushed Satoshi into doing something without him fully understanding the risks? Despite the boy's constant reassurance that he knew what he was doing, Krad wasn't so sure now.
"I just…I understood the risk I was taking, despite what you may be thinking. I understood perfectly well that if anything went wrong, even the smallest deviation in carrying out the synch, my mind could have been irreparably reconfigured… I knew that I was allowing him access to my deepest thoughts, that it was a bond of trust, as I would be able to access his. And yet I…"
Why had he wanted it so badly? Now that he considered it, he had taken a foolish, unnecessary risk that could have left him damaged beyond help. For what? A night flitting about the skies in the body of a curse he despised? If he hated Krad so much…why had he subjected himself to something that strengthened their bond even further?
"…I don't know why, Kosuke. I'm sorry. That's the best explanation I can give."
The man scowled, "…Is it that you don't know, or you don't want to admit the reason to yourself?" This wasn't what he'd planned on the ring being used for—he'd meant it to allow the poor boy a chance to not worry about his curse, a chance to experience freedom… He'd meant to shield Satoshi from Krad, not draw them closer!
"Please…" The begging tone snapped Kosuke from his thoughts, "…Please don't be Niwa." The head was still bowed, but the voice was ever plaintive, "Please don't be your son… I've already had this conversation with him once before… I don't want to have it again."
Kosuke flashed back to his conversation the day before with Daisuke, and of the argument he'd said they'd had. "Are you talking about…the fight you and Daisuke had?" Satoshi nodded slowly, eyes shut, sensing a headache rising. Kosuke sighed, "I'm sorry…I've interrupted you. Please, continue your telling."
Blue eyes slowly opened again, and he looked up in confusion, as if suddenly remembering that he'd had a tale to relate before they'd strayed off-topic. He nodded and resumed his explanation. "So we…we synchronized, and I learned how to use his body. Then I went out and just…played in it, I suppose is the best way to put it. Flew around, used his Astral, even fired one of the energy blasts he uses against Dark, blew up a statue…that was when Niwa saw me…
"He came up to me yesterday before class and tried to tell me that he'd seen Krad the night before, and that he wanted to make sure I knew, in case he'd been out without my knowledge…" He paused, now painfully aware of both Kosuke's and Krad's gazes locked on him, "…And I got mad at him…"
"This part I've heard already…but Daisuke wouldn't tell me what exactly got you mad, and how exactly your curse's wings figure into it all. Would you…?"
Satoshi's frown deepened, drawing deep lines in his face, and his thin eyebrows pulled together, "I told him…that it was me he saw the night before—me in Krad's body. That I had used a ring you gave me to take over his form, and he…he was furious that I had indulged in such a thing. Told me that I was letting my curse get more control over me, that I was giving in." He unconsciously clenched his fists in remembrance.
"The morning bell rang, and he had to sit down…but he came up to me again when the afternoon bell rang…and started ranting again because I'd let Krad project in the classroom and done nothing about it. I told him it was none of his business what I did with my own curse, but it wasn't good enough for him, and then he…he said…"
He paused here, unsure of whether or not he should go on—Kosuke didn't know of his confession to the boy…how would he react?
As if reading Satoshi's mind, the Niwa man slowly began, "…Daisuke…told me…about what you thought…of him as." Blue eyes shot up in question. "I know that you told my son you loved him."
"I don't," he snapped, too quickly for his own comfort, and blushed lightly, "That is I…don't know…anymore." He sighed and hung his head in frustration, "It all changed when he told me he didn't feel the same way…and I don't even know why I told him—I was desperate! I did love him—there was no way I couldn't! He was just too nice, too caring, too warm, too friendly—"
"Satoshi-kun…you know Daisuke's like that to almost anyone—"
"It wasn't him though, it was me! I'd never been around anyone like that! I'm a Hikari!" His tone waxed desperate now; he'd never told anyone of these feelings, even hesitant to admit it to himself. "And I just wanted—someone! Niwa was…the closest thing I had then…and I didn't want him to leave me…"
"But you know he would never do such a thing… You were his friend!"
"I didn't want a friend! I didn't need anyone! If he hadn't been that way, I wouldn't have fallen in love with him! I had to tell him, and so…because of that…he completely changed. I changed…even Krad changed…
"And then yesterday…Niwa threw it all back at me. Told me that—that I'd said I loved him…but that he was starting to think I'd found someone else…" Kosuke flinched inwardly—that had been harsh of his son. "And that…made me furious…that he would take something that meant so much to me and fling it back in my face…
"That's when it happened—the wings. I was so angry, I was all for starting a fight again, but before I could even throw a punch…they just—came out." He shot his gaze over to Kosuke, being sure to make it evident that—"It wasn't Krad, though! He had nothing to do with them, I know it. Whatever Niwa said about him was a lie! It didn't feel like him. I know what it means to have him take control of my body… I know every sensation…because it's happened so often. But that's not what it was—it was me! I made the wings manifest; it was…because of the synchronization."
Kosuke leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees and staring at the boy who'd drawn himself up, intent on getting his point across. "So…apparently Daisuke was mistaken." A nod. "Your curse had nothing to do with yesterday's incident, save in initiating the synchronization itself?" Another firm nod, and the man couldn't help cracking a tiny smile, noting, "…You seem awfully intent on defending Krad… It's quite a turnaround from when last we spoke."
For the second time during their meeting, Satoshi's cheeks burst into rosy hue, a blush spilling out over his entire face. He cast a flustered glance from Kosuke to Krad and back, furious with himself for displaying his emotions so plainly. Thankfully, his curse chose this point to dissolve into a hazy nothingness, retreating into his corner of Satoshi's mind and troubling him no further—though the boy didn't know it, he secretly was relishing Niwa Kosuke's realization and the reaction it brought about in his Tamer.
Setting his mouth into a firm frown, the boy ground out quickly, "It's just that…I'm still not happy with Niwa's sticking his nose into places he's neither wanted nor needed. He's my curse to deal with how I please, and I'll not have anyone making false accusations when I was the one at fault in the first place."
Kosuke nodded his agreement on the outside, but inside he was quite disturbed. Something wasn't right here…there was a niggling thought playing in the back of his mind regarding the boy's reaction, seeing that blush darken his cheeks.
He knew Satoshi wasn't a social boy—being of such intellect as he was, a prodigy, he hadn't been able to adjust to life as a normal child. All children his age were years behind him in the academic department, further separating him from any friends. Too young physically to be accepted as an adult, too old mentally to be accepted as a child…
Such a state of solitude should never be allowed, especially not for a fourteen-year-old boy. It wasn't natural, wasn't conducive to a healthy, normal life. And so…he was frightened that the Hikari child was reaching out—for someone, something to hold on to. He'd aimed for Daisuke, and his son had retreated out of reach. And been replaced by…
By Krad? Had Satoshi actually, unconsciously, replaced Daisuke with the curse? He knew the boy would never admit it—probably hadn't even realized it. And Kosuke wasn't close enough with him to be sure, but from what he'd just heard… The Satoshi of now was not the Satoshi of just over a month before at his father's funeral.
Perhaps he would test just how different this Satoshi was from then.
"So…" Kosuke stood and began wandering around the living room, running his gaze over the décor and startling Satoshi from his thoughts, "It seems you're getting along fine since your father's death…" The boy flinched, but Kosuke didn't see it.
Turning from the elder man, he mutely nodded and responded, "Y-yeah…fine. I go to the grave every now and then, tidy up."
Kosuke gave a tiny smile and paused in front of a picture frame on the wall of Satoshi receiving his badge on his first day of work—the boy had only really chosen to keep it after he'd grown somewhat closer to Saehara, thinking that not all memories from the station had been bad ones. "Have the police been giving you any trouble lately?" A pause, "You know, about the real murderer?"
At this, Krad phased into existence again, a deep frown painted on his delicate features and looking decidedly out of place. He seemed ready to deliver a thorough tongue-lashing to the Niwa man, but Satoshi stopped him before he even started, "Leave us; this doesn't have anything to do with you."
"Are you talking to him now?" Kosuke asked.
"Yes."
"Then on the contrary, I think this tangent has everything to do with him."
"Fine. I still don't want him looming over my shoulder while we talk."
Kosuke frowned slightly, more from pity than from anger. He waited a moment, then pressed, "Is he gone now? Is it alright to talk?" A nod. "…I get the feeling that you want me to be frank with you, to treat you as an equal and not some child to be patronized."
"I would appreciate it."
"I'll accede. Now…" He sat back down on the couch, "You were saying?"
Satoshi ducked his head. "Saehara came by a couple of weeks ago, and we talked for a bit—they've placed the murder in the 'unsolved mysteries' file now…after I asked him to."
This got Kosuke's attention. "You asked Inspector Saehara to? But—why would he comply with something like that?" He gave a rough laugh, "Now, I've come to expect his incompetence when it comes to Dark, but really, a murder case? Why on earth would he—"
"I…I explained that…it was in his best interest not to pursue the actual murderer." Kosuke paled, laughter dying away quickly, and Satoshi tried to make the man see logic. "It was just getting to be too much with all his questions, so I figured I'd try and, well, intimidate him a little…"
"You didn't…tell him about Krad, did you?"
"Not that I was him, if that's what you mean…I just implied that he…that he had a hand in the murder. And that if the police kept digging around in my past—which is just what Saehara had been doing—then my father's murderer might try something with them."
Kosuke rubbed his temples, sighing, "That's quite a lot of work to go through just to save him—Saehara could have subpoenaed you right then to give up any information on the murder."
"I didn't do it to save him," the boy ground out firmly, "It was for my own safety as well. And what you just proposed was exactly what Saehara himself proposed. Until I hinted that this would simply facilitate his untimely demise." He gave a soft smile, "It seems…I had somehow earned his respect…and for some reason he decided to listen to me, to believe me." He neglected to add how good it had felt to be depended upon, admired for his work and insight…rather than for what lay locked beneath his skin.
Kosuke had to fight openly gawking at this boy before him…he really had changed. This definitely wasn't the Hikari Satoshi who'd all but broken down in his arms at Hiwatari Kei's funeral a month-and-a-half before.
Satoshi, the Niwa man observed, had always seemed so cold, like his apartment: simple, very little decoration, no pretense, "what you see is what you get." But right now, he almost seemed as if he'd regressed to what one might have considered normal for a fourteen-year-old, like Daisuke—one who had social problems of a slightly smaller magnitude, who had difficulty making friends but kept those he did have close, who needed someone to latch on to…even if that someone was something that had hurt him in the past.
The boy's desire to be wanted and needed outweighed his desire to avoid pain, and Kosuke had to fight his paternal instinct to reach over right then and draw Satoshi into a hug.
Satoshi needed this chance to be himself, just as a body needs food, air, water. Without it, he would surely shrivel up into that cold Hikari mold he'd been forced into his whole life.
Kosuke didn't approve of Krad as the new object of Satoshi's attentions, not by far. But then, it wasn't Kosuke Krad appeared to be courting.
Smiling back at the boy, he stood and bid his goodbyes. "Wha—you're leaving? Already?" Satoshi cried, then turned to the clock, realizing he still had work to do for the next day's history assignment. "You're done with whatever you wanted to talk about?" He'd actually started appreciating their conversation when it turned more to his feelings rather than situating on the murder itself.
"Not really," Kosuke admitted, "But I've bothered you long enough, and…I think I've learned enough."
"Oh…well, umm…goodbye then, I suppose." He walked the man out the door to the elevator and waved his farewell.
'Nosy bastards, those Niwas. Every last one of them.'
"Shut up."
It was now apparent to Krad that something had to be done.
If he didn't see to these Niwas constantly barging into his and his Tamer's relationship, then that Emiko woman was bound to show up next, and he didn't think he'd be able to keep his word to Satoshi about not killing anymore if that happened.
While Satoshi idled away the next few hours on his schoolwork, the blonde busied himself with this little problem. It seemed the only way to solve it was to confront it head on: he and Niwa Kosuke would need to have a little chat.
Satoshi posed something of a problem to this, though. If Krad calculated correctly, then their conversation would most likely touch on topics that the blonde felt his host didn't need to be privy to just yet. That meant he'd need to temporarily knock the boy out.
The following evening was the night of Dark's next target attempt, and though it pained Krad to give up the piece without a fight, he knew that it would be his best chance. Most of the Niwa household would be engrossed in the evening news, and Satoshi wouldn't give Krad's going out a passing thought, thinking he meant merely to confront Dark.
Satoshi wasn't much longer with his homework and soon toddled off to bed, praying silently that Niwa's spell really had worked, and he wouldn't be greeted with stares and gasps the next day as everyone recalled the wing incident.
When his host finally nodded off, Krad set to work conjuring up a notice to send to Kosuke, adding a dash of tracer magic to be sure that Kosuke and Kosuke only received the message. In a flash of gold the note zipped off into the night, instructing the man to meet Krad the next evening at Halcyon's Point, the cliff overlooking the Temple of Neptune that lay sunken beneath the Azumano shore-waters.
With Satoshi effectively silenced by a sleep-spell the next night, Krad stood like a glowing marble statue on the cape staring out into the cold night waters far below the cliff's edge, listening contently to the soft hissing as the waters rolled in and crashed loudly against the earth, sending spouts of spray high into the air. He would most certainly receive a loud berating lecture in the morning and be demanded that he explain what exactly went on while his host was knocked out—as well as why he'd been knocked out—but Krad was beyond caring for the moment. He was meeting someone.
"I see that deranged wife of yours let you out of your cage long enough to come visit, did she? How elaborate a lie did you have to weave?"
The dark haired Niwa man frowned at the characterization of his wife. "Emiko-san and Otousan always watch Dark's jobs on the news…I doubt they even realize I'm out…"
Shrugging his shoulders, Krad couldn't complain—however this had happened, they were here, standing just back from the edge of a cliff on the northern border of the Azumano district, "chatting."
"Well?" Kosuke pressed after a moment of silence when the blonde turned away from him to stare back out over the water. He held up a slip of paper. "You're the one who sent this, right? What do you want? It's rude to keep guests waiting, you know."
A thin smile winding its way over his lips, Krad twisted around until he was facing Kosuke properly. "How right you are, Niwa Kosuke-san." He gave a low bow in mock apology. Crossing his arms as he pulled back up, he slipped into a mild explanation.
"I called you here because…it seemed about time we talk." Kosuke raised an eyebrow in confusion. "You've been getting awfully…'amicable'…with Satoshi-sama lately, and this is something of both a bother and worry to me. I'm quite curious as to why a Niwa would be getting involved in my Satoshi-sama's personal affairs, and I'm especially interested in learning why you care so much about mine and his relationship."
If it was possible, he hardened his glare at the man. "You—you aren't even a real Niwa. Just an assimilated parent—one of the lucky fools, or should I say unlucky in your case, who manages to form a union with a Niwa or Hikari, taking their name and furthering the lines. None of your predecessors have been as involved in our affairs as you—Satoshi-sama's own father left before he was even born, forgotten.
"So I ask again, what is it you want with my Tamer? Are you perhaps thinking that by winning his favor you can single-handedly bring an end to this feud? A stupid human goal, to be sure—but quite characteristic of a Niwa."
"You think it's strange that I'm staying with the family I love?"
Krad scoffed loudly, "You're an outsider. An interloper. You have no place in our affairs. You can't sympathize, and you can't help—not the Niwas or Hikaris. Do you know how much pain it used to bring Satoshi-sama, knowing that his real father left him?"
Unable to bite back the snappy return, Kosuke retorted sharply, "As much pain as when his foster father was taken from him?"
The words died away when Krad didn't immediately reply, boring holes into the man's skull with his golden gaze. As a bloodline curse, he had no concept of family, no concept of siblings, or parents, or any relationship beyond host/curse. And his past experiences through previous tamers had taught him nothing about loving fathers or mothers: only the time-honored yet all-too-painful tradition of shipping sons off to be "educated".
Niwa Kosuke…confused him.
"I don't like you, human—" he drawled.
The man was quick to return, "Then the feeling is mutual."
"—and let me inform you that the only reason you are even still alive is because I've promised Satoshi-sama that I would not harm him anymore if I could help it…I'm under the impression that your death might cause him pain, so count your blessings."
Kosuke blinked a few times in rapid succession. Krad had…promised something? A promise was not lightly taken in either family, this much he understood. It was as binding as a written contract in the Niwa household, and he would put money on it being as important a concept in the Hikari clan as well, harkening back to days of chivalry and such when a man's word was his bond.
And this thing, this curse had…promised his own host—that he wouldn't hurt him anymore?
"What do you mean…promised? When—why?"
Krad sighed and fought the urge to roll his eyes. Humans were so impatient at times. Turning his eyes away, he slipped into a swift recount of the gravesite personal oath he'd taken as he'd watched his Satoshi-sama. "He did for me what no Tamer before had done—cared about my views, how I saw the world and interacted with it, so…so I did for him what I'd done for no other Tamer—took a binding oath that if I could help it in any way, I would do nothing more that I knew would harm him." He paused, and elaborated slightly. "I no longer take his body by force to chase after Dark, I will never kill should he not wish it, and…I try with all my will…to be whatever he might want me to be."
So this—this was Krad? The Krad he'd heard about for years from Emiko-san and her father? Krad of the Hikari, the dreaded golden demon of the ice hunters? It looked as if Kosuke was going to have to slightly modify his view of this creature—no, this being, this man. The curse was not a thing. He was sentient, with…feelings? Was that even possible, for Krad?
Kosuke liked to think he was a good judge of character, that he could tell when someone was lying—and that entire speech Krad had just delivered, had it flowed forth from the skilled lips of most any other living being, the Niwa father would have most likely taken it for truth without a second thought.
It was merely the knowledge that with the Hikari clan, nothing could be taken at face value. Least of all their famed curse. Could he truly be capable of changing his ways, going counter to his methodology of three hundred years—and not just on a whim but for his own host? Something…didn't fit here. But was it because it was wrong, or because he was simply trying to fit Krad into the Niwa molded mindset?
He stared at the blonde before him, thoughts wandering back to his conversation with the Hikari boy a few days prior, and settled upon Satoshi's rendition of what he'd gone through since the funeral: his new tutoring role, the unlikely mutual agreement with his curse, painting, horrifying cooking experiences, all culminating…in the unique use he'd put Kosuke's gift to by taking over the curse's own body and flitting through the Azumano night skies like a child with a new toy (according to Dark and Daisuke, that is).
But…even the way Satoshi had spoken of the experiences, it was strange…his eyes were brighter, more—more childish he'd dare say, but only in the sense that Satoshi was a child. Something had shifted between Satoshi and his curse, and Kosuke, frustrated, couldn't put his finger on what it was—and if it was good…or bad.
So he stopped trying and put it to the being himself:
"Why are you doing all this for him, Krad?"
In any other situation, the Niwa man might have actually laughed at the almost deer-in-headlights look that plastered itself across the Hikari curse's slender features, and he silently cheered in childish glee as that same curse actually faltered for words.
Krad was a wreck inside with the question addressed to him now. "Why?" the man called Kosuke asked him, and Krad could only stutter inelegantly. Why was he doing all this?
"Because…be—because…" Because…why? Because Satoshi-sama was his host? Because he was the last of his precious Hikaris? He swallowed hard and steadied his voice: "Because I want to."
This, sadly, was not enough to satisfy Kosuke. "But why? Why do you want to? Is it personal pleasure, or some sort of twisted altruism? Can you not tell?"
"Why do you care so much, human?" Krad got on the defensive and narrowed his eyes. "What business do you have, poking in the affairs of divine beings?"
"The 'divine beings' poked in my affairs first, Krad." The father frowned, waxing nostalgic, "All I did was fall in love…I never asked that this be brought upon my child."
Pausing a moment to digest the excuse, Krad almost smiled at the familiarity of the lament. "…You sound like Satoshi-sama…"
Dark eyes shot back to the blonde, "Do I? And you would know that…how?"
Krad bristled defensively. "Because I'm always with him—always! Always listening, always there for him—" He smirked, "Tell me, were you always there for your child, Niwa Kosuke?"
As if the words had actually sunken needle-like teeth into his skin, Kosuke cringed inward a bit, but quickly recovered. "No…I wasn't…but at least I always cared for him—for his well being, at least I always worked for his own good, above my own."
"And you think I don't care?" came the return, as if on instinct.
"You don't." Kosuke didn't miss a harsh beat, continuing to pelt the Hikari with everything he had. "I talked to him, you know—the other day. And he was…different…than from the last time we'd spoken. At his father's funeral. Caring…murder is all you care about. It's your entire reason for existing, and it's all that occupies your thoughts. Three hundred years of a bloodbath, Krad…three hundred years."
Fighting rolling his eyes at the melodrama, Krad drawled lazily, "If that's your pathetic attempt to make me regret killing Hiwatari, you've failed. I only regret…that it pained Satoshi-sama."
Kosuke tried another angle. "Then you claim that in these past, what—months?—you've begun to care for that boy? For these months, you've actually held affection for him? Is that the best you can do to throw me off?" He laughed dryly, completely devoid of mirth. "That the Hikaris have stooped so low…Wouldn't Rio-san be rolling over in her grave right now?"
Krad simply glared more harshly, and Kosuke continued, "Since Satoshi-kun has been deprived of his own father figure, I have taken it upon myself to step in an watch over him. To approve or disapprove of those he consorts with—and I do not approve of you, Hikari Krad. I'm disinclined to believe that Satoshi-kun is being led down a path that he will later be thankful he followed—"
"Then what a pity that it doesn't matter if you approve or not. Higher powers than the Hikari or Niwa clans have appointed that he and I should be one and the same." He now echoed the father's earlier wry laugh.
"Can you stop destiny, Niwa Kosuke? Can you go against the gods, human?…I suppose, technically, you could—I would love to see you try. But, then again…I'd also love to see you as a corpse."
"Yes, of course," Kosuke corroborated, shaking his brown head, "And not have dirtied your own hands. You would love that. Then be, once again, all your precious 'Satoshi-sama' had left to turn to." He sneered in a very un-Kosuke-like manner, "You've led him to believe you've changed, but you haven't. Once a filthy pretentious ice hunter, always one. Once a deserter, always a deserter. At least I will be there for him, and he knows that."
"Oh, but I have changed," Krad hissed, leaning close to almost whisper the words into his left ear. "You see…at one point in time, I would have killed you without a second thought…So explain to me why you're still babbling here…If I haven't changed, as you say."
Kosuke stepped back and held up his hands in a gesture likened to giving up, "Fine then, I concede—you have changed…But again I ask why? Why did the great thief-killer, that divine vision of the grandest line of artists since the Renaissance masters…why did perfection in mind, body and purpose change?" He cocked his head, "If you truly were perfect…then change was unnecessary, right?"
Again, Krad faltered, unbalanced by the query. "I—because…because Satoshi-sama wished it—"
"And since when have you ever listened to anything he's asked?—You've still not answered the question, Krad: why?"
This, though, was about as far as the blonde was willing to let himself be pushed, "HUMAN!" he snapped back loudly, silencing a group of nightbirds who'd been calling back and forth across the meadow behind them. He dropped his voice low again, "You overstep your lines—know your place, father of thieves."
And almost unintentionally, Kosuke actually did take a step back—heart thumping at a slightly faster rate now than just a moment ago. He wasn't stupid—but actually quite clever. He understood well enough what Krad was: that he really could kill him without a second thought, without fear of punishment or any earthly consequence.
Somehow, though, he pushed these thoughts aside and summoned a steady voice to reply, "I step where I need in order to protect those dear to me: and Satoshi-kun is like my own son."
"A Hikari…like a Niwa?" Krad laughed, though doing nothing to dissipate the tension hanging between the two men, "Ridiculous—I have heard nobler words than those before, and trust me: they do not affect my conscience in any way."
"Is that to imply that you actually have a conscience?"
Krad effectively ignored him and continued on, stroking his chin in thought. "A Hikari as your own child, your son…Yes, you would like that, wouldn't you? Niwas are like crows—filthy black mongrel-like crows. They cannot resist the allure of the beautiful."
"I don't care for him because he's a Hikari, can't you understand that?" This was getting frustrating, "I care for him because—because he's Satoshi-kun, because he's a living being, a human who needs to be cared for!"
"Satoshi-sama does not need your 'caring'! In fact he needs nothing from a Niwa. He has me—he's happy that way, and I do care, Niwa Kosuke!" By the end of the statement he was yelling again, and his eyes steadily fell away to the ground, tired of glaring so much.
"I…I know his heart of hearts—I see into his mind and soul because it is my own. And I know what he fears, what he dreads…the loneliness…of being…of being bound to me…"
Kosuke's gaze locked onto the blond crown which hung low now, and could almost see a painted mask fall away, revealing a being who was old and tired and wanted so badly…for something…
"He hates me, you know…" A pause, "He hates that he's a Hikari, that I came to him…he'd rather die than keep it up…
"He hates me…and I hate that he hates me…because it hurts so much…"
He craned his neck upwards to looks into Kosuke's sympathetic brown eyes, "But…I didn't care, for the longest time, I didn't…you pegged me correctly, but now…" He shook his head in frustration, golden mane swishing back and forth, "You keep asking me 'why, why' why do I care—and I don't know why! I just—do!
"…Wouldn't you hate it, if your Daisuke hated you?" Kosuke drew in a sharp breath, "Wouldn't it rip you apart from the inside if every time he looked at you, it was with rage and anger and that he always always wished you'd just die and leave him alone?
"That if he could touch you, he would hurt you…but by simply not being able to, he hurts you even more than any strike ever could…?
"Wouldn't you hate it…if he couldn't love you? If he was…dead…inside? If he killed his heart…because he feared you? If your beloved feared you, Kosuke…
"If they shrank from your presence…If your every kindness was greeted with suspicion and mistrust, never a moment of faith… If you couldn't look into their eyes for the terror you'd meet staring back…
"If you knew they shrank from other people, that they denied themselves other people…because of you…
"If all you ever heard were words laced with poison, so that they ate away at your soul bit by bit…but you didn't care, just to be able to hear them…?
"If they would not allow themselves to love because of you, and if all you ever wanted was some of that love for yourself…
"If you had to live every single day with only that base hatred pounding into you every waking moment…
"If they would end their own precious life…just to be free from you…
"…Would you not do anything to change it? Would you not change yourself? Become perfect, or imperfect , or ugly, or beautiful, or Hikari, or Niwa—just so that they would, once, smile at you…?"
A heaving sigh, "…I would, Niwa. For Satoshi-sama…I would do anything…Even die."
His head dropped again as before, "You want him to be happy…then that makes two of us, Niwa…But you think I cannot help him—who are you to deny me the chance to even try?" He clenched a fist tightly. "The gods have allotted me long life…immortality I dare say…and all this time I'd spent squandering it…" His lips curved into a faint, sad smile.
"Yet now…I would not care if they struck me down this instant—right here…if I could tell him… If he would see me…" His golden voice, so normally steady and unchanging, broke. "Just…once…
"I have no right to ask such a thing…I know…But I—I don't care…" His eyes slid shut, "May his radiant face be the last thing I see…before Hell burns away my sight… May he live on, and be happy…
"I am old, I have seen so much of human life, yet…in these past few months…it's as if I've been reborn. I had only been eating the crumbs, had only been watching the violin—and now I can taste the wine, can hear the symphony! Satoshi-sama is…
"He is young, Niwa Kosuke…only a boy…as I said, I am old… If I die…let me die. Let him live… Let him love… Let him…" He choked on the words, leaving them lodged in his throat before finally forcing them over his lips, "…forget me…
"I know…I know he wants to, but…I'm too selfish to let him on my own…If that's what he needs, let him…let him be…"
Further words failed him, and his knees trembled, threatening to give way, but pure Hikari pride would not allow him to prove himself any weaker before a Niwa.
"Krad, you…" Kosuke was absolutely thunderstuck by the outpouring of emotion, eyes wide and disbelieving, "You feel…"
The blonde gathered himself, then turned and began walking away slowly, completely emotionally burned out from the entire ordeal. "No words…express the depth of this emotion, human…"
He had gotten barely a few steps into the clearing inland from the cliff's edge, though, when Kosuke's voice carried to his ears.
"…There is one."
The immaculate white boots stopped dead in their tracks, masking the shaking legs, trembling in trepidation and exhaustion. But much as he mentally willed the word to remain forever perched on the Niwa father's lips, he could do nothing—not with all his astral power—to stop it from flitting to his ear like one of the tiny eveningbirds in the trees.
"Love."
Love…Krad knew that word…
"You love him, Krad."
…Damn know-it-all Niwas.
Author's Notes: Sincerest apologies for the late update, but was being stupid with their downtime. As compensation, this chapter's extra long, so enjoy! Next week: Fun with languages as Daisuke proves Dark right in his characterization as "The nosiest Niwa he's ever had the pleasure of cursing."