This is my first FMA story and by far my first one-shot ever so please be nice.I do not own FMA thought I wish I did on Ed and Mustang.
Edward Elric flopped back onto the black leather couch of the Colnel's office giving a world wary sigh."Damn him to hell,"he muttered.He had been waiting for the Flame alchemist for several minutes now and to put it blandly he was bored out of his mind."Damn procrastinating womanizing pedophile fucker Colnel Bastard,"Ed mummblesd under his breath,"I'm gonna kick ass or better yet transumute him into a tree and then burn him ta' ashes."He sat up and looked around the room for somethig to keep him busy.He spotted a bonsai tree sitting on a table next to the door.He gave another sigh and layed back on the couch.Five more minutes past by as Ed sat growing tired of waiting.Suddenly a thought floated into his brain."I'll teach Colnel Bastard to be late again,"Edward said evily standing and walking swiftly to the Colnel's desk.
Roy Muastang walked down the hall with the newest secretary,Emily.She had dark brown hair and alluring blue eyes.She was quite slender and elogant.Roy was currently trying to be the sauve and smooth for a quick dinner and maybe a "visit" to his house later in the week."I wondering if you would care to go for dinner and a maybe a stop at my place for a chat?"he asked smoothly making her giggle.'Say yes,'he thought,'Nobody can resist Colnel Roy Mustang.'She giggled and nodded.'Score!'"When can I exspect you?"she asked softly."Oh 6:00 Saturday good?"Roy asked."Ok see you then,"she said turning a cornor and walking down the hallway.Roy started walking with a slight hop in his step as he thought he would get some coffee.'I can't help but think there is something...small I forgot,'he thought,'Something back in my office.'Roy shrugged the thought away and went for his coffee.
Ed dusted his hands off as he finished the improvements to "Colnel Bastard's" office.He grinned at his handy work and layed back on the couch.'Take that you fucker,'Ed thought amusedly.
Roy sipped at his Coffee as Full Metal slipped into his mind.'Hmmm why would I be thinking about Full Metal,unless...he is the thing I forgot!'Roy jumped up and rushed down the hall to his office hoping the young alchemist hadn't caused too much disaster in his office.He turned into the offices of Havoc,Fury,Hawkeye,and all of his other underlings ignoring Hawkeye as she said that Edward Elric was waiting for him.Roy opened his ofice door to find the Full Metal Pipsqueak had not done any damage at all.In fact he was laying inoccently on the couch.'Heh...Full Metal...inoccent riiiiiight.' "Where the fuck have you been?"Ed asked as he spoted the Colnel enter.Edward grinned mentally.'Just sit in your chair and pull up to desk.'Roy walked carefully towards his desk watching Full Metal who had a seemingly inocent irritated expressin on his face."I was doing some work,"he said as he seated himself in his chair puting on his usual smirking,"I must have forgotten about you since you are so insignifigant.""WHO YOU CALLING INSIGNIFIGANT YOU FUCKING BASTARD!"Ed yelled at the Colnel angrily.Roy kept his face placid with a smirk still lighting his features.He lifted his elbows to find his desk too far away to prop them on.He slowly scooted his chair up sensing no danger."I believe it was you Full Metal,"he said as he inched closer to the desk not knowingg he was pulling a nearly invisible wire taunter and taunter.'Almost there,'thought Edward as he watched roy come closer and closer to the trap."FUCK YOU!"Edward yelled keeping his act up.Mustang pulled his chair finally close enough to his desk that the wire snapped and a bucket of glue started to come dow."You might want to-,"Ed started to warn Mustang purposely late when...SPLAT!The glue landed right on Mustang and Ed allowed a triuphant expression to come upon his face.He gave away a giant grin."Jee I wonder who put that there,"Ed said inoccently.Mustang glared at Ed."Yes I wonder,"he muttered."Serves you right for being so late fucker,"Ed said standing up and walking to the door,"See ya'."He left the office leaving Colnel to stick to every thing.