Ang nakaraan sa Chicharong Flower…

Nagkita na sina Hiashi at Neji, ngunit parang mas type ng matandang Hyuuga si Tenten kaysa kay Ino! At sa climax ng nakaraang kabanata ay tinawag ni Neji ang kanyang uncle na isang impostor! Bakheet? May evil twin brother c Hiashi? Ibig sabihin, ampon lang ang daddy ni Neji? O ang totoo ay triplets tlaga ang mga ama nina Hinata, at nde lang alam ni Kishimoto yun? Pero bago natin tuluyang guluhin ang storyline ng Naruto, tumuloy na tau sa kabanatang ito…

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Napatayo si Hyuuga Hiashi, a look of disbelief on his wrinkled face. "How could you say such terrible things, my nephew? How could you think of me as a feke?"

"Fake," corrected Ino wanly.

"Feke!" sigaw nina Hiashi at Naruto.

"Suko na ko," buntung-hininga ni Shikamaru, saka naupo sa malapit na chair para matulog na lang, tulad nang ginagawa nya pag ang palabas na sa TV ay Daisy Siyete.

Napailing si Neji. "Alam na namin lahat ang katotohanan—"
"Ako hinde!" ani Tenten, visible sa mukha ang damdamin nyang litong-lito.

"—kaya lumabas ka na sa balatkayo mong yan." Neji crossed his arms in front of his chest. "Ikaw si…"

"Gasp!" si Tenten.

Pumunta si Naruto at hinablot ang mukha ni Hiashi, saka hinila, revealing the self-confessed Pinakamagandang Lalaki sa Balat ng Tinalupan na Chickenjoy.

Napamaang ang lahat. "Eddie Gil!"

Ang presidente ng Pilipinas daw ay ngumiti nang matamis, sabay suklay sa kanyang pilukang itim.

Neji glared at his cousin's husband. "Akala ko ba—"

Si Naruto ay napangiwi. "You example of a son of a gun! You are already exposed, and yet you still try to hide your true colors!"

"Bakit example?" tanong ni Tenten kay Hinata.

"Mapagkunwari."

Hinablot ni Naruto muli ang maskarang tumatabing sa mukha ng mystery ama ni Hinata. "Magpakilala ka na—Paolo Santos!" Hinablot muli nito ang maskara. "Mike Enriquez!" And another mask fell off. "Richard Gomez!" And another one. "GM Praetor!" And yet another one. "FPJ! Sabi ko na nga ba't buhay ka pa eh! Hindi ata puwede mamatay ang bida sa pelikula no!"

Hinata pulled her Panday-fanatical husband back, and then smiled at the pretender gently. "Sige na, Sir Gai, magpakilala ka na."

"Sir Gai!" ani Tenten, kunot noo. Sino na naman yun?

"Oh my gulay!" Napabuntunghininga si FPJ, saka inalis ang maskara. "I would have succeeded, if not for you meddling kids."

"Ano bang ginagawa mo dito, Gai?" tanong ni Neji, frowning. He didn't like the idea of him being toyed by his former teacher, nor did he like the idea of his secretly cherished movie idol speaking in English. Pero sabi na nga ba nya't kahina-hinala na mas malala ang English ni Hiashi-sama kaysa dati…mas malala pa kay Naruto.

"Sino si Gai?" pangungulit ni Tenten. Ano ang kinalaman ng mukhang retarded na bondying na ito na ipinaganak atang walang fashion IQ sa buhay ng guwapong binatang nag-aalaga ng baboy sa bakuran?

Gai lifted his trembling arms towards the scowling Neji. "Neji, come to me. I am your father."

"Noooo!" sigaw ni Tenten, aghast. Ibig sabihin, possible cyang malahian ng mga genes na kamukha ng sa Gai na ito? My gaaaad namaaan!

The sensei grinned. "Joke!" He cheerfully punched the soldier of his student. "This young man with the burning apoy of youth is my adopted and surrogate son. I am his surrogate father. I adopted and surrogated him as my own, but he is too shy to adopt and surrogate me as his own too."

"Dati po cyang guro ni Kuya Neji sa taijutsu, kung fu, karate, judo, a-at…" pagbibigay-impormasyon ni Hinata, sabay tingin sa dark-faced na pinsan.

"Ballroom dancing! Hahaha!" Maito Gai's grinning face was finally revealed, to the dismay of Neji. "Do you still remember the dip we did? Hahaha!"

"Naibaon ko na nga sa limot, hinukay mo pa," masama ang loob na turan ni Hyuuga Neji, kitang-kita sa mukha ang hinagpis na sinapit sa kabanatang iyon ng buhay nya.

"Well, student of mine, I've heard about your problem. Your cousin-in-law here called up my office—"

"Office!" Nagulantang si Neji. "Anong office?"

"Oh, you don't know? I work as a professional hair stylist in Hollywood!"

"Ano!" He secretly prayed that Gai's hands hadn't touched Steven Seagull's hair yet. Idol nya din yun eh.

"I have handled many hairs, not as nice and shiny as mine and yours, but…but they have many, many hairs!" narrated the teacher cheerfully. "I even provided my service to this sterling rising Hollywood actor named Janjalani, and his sidekick, Abaya! I am very famous, you know."

Ino sighed. "So pano na po uli kau nakarating dito?"

"Anyway, your cousin-in-law called me up, telling me that you're too bugnutin, and that you need a lovelife so that you won't be bugnutin anymore. But since you will not listen to me, I don't know why you won't anyway, I decided to be a feke!" explained Gai cheerfully. "And since Hiashi is dead, I hope he didn't mind that I used his identity! Haha!"

Hinata sighed, nagdarasal na nde multuhin ang taong ito ng kanyang ama. "Pero Sir Gai, sana naman po, naisip nyo na nde nyo po maloloko ang Kuya Neji ko. Nangako na po cya dati sa harap ng puntod ng ama ko po na magiging guardian ko cya."

"Puntod ng tatay mo yun?" ani Neji, tapos napangiwi. "Oo nga pala, nakalimutan ko." He turned to the married couple, pahiya. "Bket nde nyo cnabi agad sa akin? Bakit hinayaan nyo akong mag-panic at maghanap ng fiancée kung alam nyo naman pla ang buong hubad na katotohanan?" Parang lalapa ng dalawang dosenang Jollibee Champ ang itsura ng binata.

Hinata cowered behind her hubby, na mukhang nde nabalisa sa lalaking Hyuuga. "K-Kuya Neji, patawad. Nagawa lang kc namin yun kc…"

Naruto grinned. "There, there, cousin so lawful. Please understand. Your teacher promised us Balikbayan bags if we promise to recuperate with him."

"Stupeeeeed!" ani Gai, pointing his finger at the idiot who berated the English language. "It's shoulds be corporate! Does you understands me?"

Tenten turned to Hinata and the bags she was carrying. "Puro noodles lang laman nyan eh. Baka naman relief goods lang yan na dinampot sa Thailand."

"Kahit bilhin mo rin naman sa tindahan eh madalas, galing den yun sa relief goods center," sabat ni Shikamaru.

"Well, nevertheless, I have succeeded, right?" ani Gai, tila proud na proud sa sarili. "I was able to serve my purpose—to give Neji the ini..ini…initiativity? initialization? Initia—"

"Initiative," salo ni Tenten.

Gai smiled. "Exactly what my tongue forgot to pronounce." He continued. "Thanks to me, you had the inishatib to fall in love!"

"I do NOT need an initiative!" snapped Neji. "Malaki na ako. Alam ko na ang kelangan at nde ko kelangan."

"You know it alright, but you don't accept it." Gai shook his head. "Alam mo, you know, ever since you were little, your pride and your heart had always find it difficult to reconcile with each other. They keep on banging and banging on each other, like cymbals in the musikos. This led to your psychological disorder called bugnutin."

"Ha?" ang tanging nasabi ng Byakugan-using na binata.

"Tapos, when you're bugnutin, you're not fun to be with anymore," sumbong pa ni Naruto. "Your head is always hot, and you keep on shouting and shouting even when the problem is only very small…"

"And when you're shouting and shouting, you disrupt the peace and order of your home," ani Hinata. "Hindi ka ba nag-aalala sa pamangkin mo?" She touched her womb. Napangiwi cya at ang konsensya nya.

"Tsaka alam mo Neji—" ani Gai.

"Tama na!" sigaw ng binata. Ano ito, open forum ukol sa hinaing ng bayan laban sa kanya?

"Anyway, the point is," ani Gai, bawi agad. "When you started feeling love, you started to act less bugnutin. You started smiling more often, even if nothing is funny. Oh wait, is that good news, or another psychological disorder?"

"Kuya Neji, mas naipakita mo ang humanity mo simula nang nakilala mo si Ate Tenten," salo ni Hinata smilingly.

Immediately, his pale eyes went to the chicharon vendor, na speechless din. Humanity? Love? Nde nya alam yun. Pero aminado cya na parang mas gumaan ang mundo simula nang kanyang nakilala ang dalagang ito. If humanity meant learning to laugh at the little hassles in life…if love meant eating high cholesterol food just to appreciate the blushing cook…

His eyes softened. Yes, maybe Tenten was closer to his heart than he wants to admit.

Naruto nudged Hinata. "See that? That's how I looked at you the first time I realized na mahal ko na pala ang dakila kong stalker."

"Stalker?"

"Hehe. That's how I call you then."

Gai beamed approvingly. Finally, his student understood the value of acceptance. Ngayon, kung maiintindihan nito ang value ng recommended hair conditioner nya eh masaya at fulfilled na ang dakilang guro sa career nya.

Shikamaru's head raised wearily. "Tapos na ba? Uwian na?"

…………………………………………………

"So sa bandang huli, nauwi din pala sa wala ang lahat ng pinaghirapan ko," ani Tenten habang silang dalawa ni Neji ay nakaupo sa bubungan, nagtotong-its sabay kain ng butong-pakwan at Boy Bawang.

Kumuha si Neji sa stack ng isang baraha. "Hayaan mo na. Nabayaran ko na pala si Ino para sa efforts."

"Hinihingi nya pa rin ata cel mo eh," grumbled the chicharong flower cook, kinuha ang hulog ni Neji sabay labas ng dalawa pang King.

"Oo. Sila daw ang bahala sa flowers ko pag sinipa ko na ang balde," wika ng Hyuuga habang lihim na pinapagalitan ang sarili. Dapat kc, yung nilaglag nya eh yung Jack spade.

"Pano nyan?" tanong ni Tenten, sabay hulog ng Queen spade.

Ang sama ng tingin ni Neji sa King spade na nasa bahay ni Tenten. Muli cyang bumunot sa stack. "Aling nyan?" He then remembered it. "Aaah. Oo, wag ka mag-alala dun sa chicharon mo. Susundin ko pa rin ang napag-usapan natin. Bukas, ipapadala ko na ang lahat ng mga baboy sa matador."

"P-Pero…" Hindi naman yun ang nais itanong ng dalaga. "P-Paano tayo?" Her eyes shook in uncertainity. He kissed her, and even if natahimik cya kanina bigla nang I-suggest nina Hinata na bagay cla, di ba ibig sabihin nun, may interes sa kanya ito?

"Tayo?" Neji looked puzzled. "Sasama pa ba tayo sa magkakatay? Antayin na lang natin dito—" Nagulat ito nang itapon sa mukha nya ang mga baraha. "T-teka, Tenten! Bakit ba?"

"Ewan ko sau!" she yelled, grumpily jumping down from the roof to the second floor of the mansion.

"Tenten!"

She looked up at the roof, eyes crinkled in annoyance. "Ano?"

He pointed to the cards. "Tong-its na pla ako." And he nearly died with her glare, if looks could really kill. He could only watch as the girl entered the hallway. "Ano ba yun…kanina, nag-totong-its lang kami, tapos bigla, lumayas. Mga babae tlaga, oo…"

Pero may isa pa cyang malaking problema: galit ata sa kanya yung dalaga, kung anuman ang dahilan ewan nya. But that wouldn't help him, especially when he was so clueless as to how to tell the woman na gusto na nya itong maging permanenteng kasambahay.

If not his wife.

…………………………………………….

Klaro na ang mga pangyayari, ngunit may isa pang suliraning haharapin ang dalawang magsing-irog in denial. Malalaman kaya ni Neji ang dahilan kung bakit cya binato ng baraha ni Tenten? Malalaman kaya ni Tenten na sinilipan cya ng baraha ni Neji kaya lng ito nag-tong its?Lagi na lng b c Lito Cruz ang tatawagan ng Ma'am nya para mag-recite sa Spelling at Math? Mga nagbabagang tanong na sasagutin sa huling kabanata ng Chicharong Flower.

( itutuloy )