Forces of Attraction Chapter 22: The Diary, a harry potter fanfic

Disclaimer: Not mine.

Sorry for the wait everyone. The chapter might change as my other beta hasn't read it yet. It's probably shitty anyway. But have fun.

Chapter 22:

Draco Malfoy was an enigma. That she knew. Something she could never figure out. But to hold the secrets of his life, his intimate thoughts was so unnerving that her first instinct was not that of Hermione's, to eagerly read and scrutinise his words, but to shut it quickly and forcefully. She shut her eyes shut in thought. Did she really want to know what lay in there? How much he had hurt her through saying nothing at all. How much more could he hurt her through his words? He could be cold and cruel. Maybe she was happy not knowing. Maybe through her ignorance she could actually believe that he had loved her once.

But was that really what she wanted to believe? A lie to flatter her ego? The hidden truth for her own self image?

No. That was not what she wanted. And with a sigh she opened the pages of his diary, and began reading.

What she read, she never could have fathomed.

February 16,
Today is mother's birthday. She woke up very early in the morning and pampered herself to a rose petal bath. Twelve of her women in waiting helped her style her hair, and 16 of them did her makeup. None of them helped her get dressed. She wanted every last detail to be perfect for when father came home.
But father never came home. Word came to us that he was in a secret meeting with 'him'. 29 of mother's closest friends were here, but not her husband. He was too busy.
She smiled and excused herself from the table, and when I followed her up to her room she yelled at me to get back. Shocked I stood there. Catching her temper she smiled and pardoned herself. Her excuse was she was tired and she retreated back to bed. My excuse was my worry for her and I stood at her door for hours, listening to her cry. And when he came home finally, the hatred that filled my heart was more than I have ever held with him before.
I hate him.

March 23,
Chris has come to stay. Something to keep me occupied. At least for a week or two. She intended to surprise me with her visit, but it was her who got the biggest surprised when she burst into my room to find Pansy stark naked sprawled across my bed.
The thought of it makes me laugh.
She tried to be angry with me for even daring to entertain that low life, as she called her.
That makes me laugh even more.
Ten minutes later we were making passionate love on the same bed.
She can't help it really. I am a Malfoy after all.

March 24,
Brock paid me a visit today.
It's amazing how he disguises his jealousy of me with companionship. Unsuccessfully, that is. I know what he's really up to.
He invents schemes to bring me down. But still I play his game, and manage to beat him at it every time. Can't blame him really. After all I am his superior. His father is no where near as high in the league as mine. And he hasn't half as much money as I have in ONE of my banks.
You know what they say, don't roll with the big boys.
XX
April 2,
Back to school. Normally, I would have begged father to let me stay at home. Hogwarts is hardly fit for one as privileged as myself, of course.
But Father and I are not on speaking terms, though he does not know it. Unfortunately the respect I hold for him, though laced with despise, is too much for me to say to his face how low and filthy he is.
I caught him at it with one of the maids yesterday. Fucking her brains out I should stay instead. While my mother was out buying him a new suit for his upcoming soiree.
He explained to me that's what a man does.
That is what a man does. But not to my mother.
Low down piece of shit he is.
Maybe one day I'll have the guts to say it to his face.
XX
May 26,
My birthday today.
One card and counting. Mother has written it herself, and signed it love father and mother. But I know he had nothing to do with it. He probably forgot. Or maybe he remembered and thought it wasn't important enough for his time.
Too much of that.
On to 7th consecutive birthday fuck.
5 more to go.
Oh yes, I am a Malfoy.
XX
Pansy caught me at it with Meche the other day.
Nothing to it, just a friendly fuck.
Nothing to what I have with her either.
But you cant rationalise with a woman.
She said to me I was as filthy as my father, and that she shouldn't expect much more from the bastard son of a Malfoy.
I slapped her.
I am not a bastard son. My parents were two years into wedlock when I was conceived.
Besides, I am not filthy either.
And NOTHING like my father.
I do not love her. I don't owe her any respect.
Then I began thinking, does father love mother? He has no reason not to. The bastard that he is.
XX
June 29,
Potter's somehow managed to receive special commendations from Dumbledore for high marks in the defence against the dark arts nationwide competition.
Then Dumbledore turned to me and said that my results were very disappointing.
Had I done well, I would instantly be put on the potential death eater list.
Do badly, and I become and disappointment.
Really, there is no pleasing that man. Unless I get assaulted as a baby and develop a lifelong scar.
Fat chance.
XX
July 1,
Father suspects Snape is being dishonest to the Dark Lord and wants me to find out about it.
Frankly I have no time for detective work as I have a life of my own and I don't give a rat's ass what Father, Snape, or Voldermort do with their spare time.
But I politely said 'yes father' and promised to investigate the situation.
Ten minutes into it I met Sienna in the broom closet and got distracted my more 'pressing' matters.
XX
July 3,
Father wrote me a letter saying that he does not think that I am living up to my potential as a Malfoy, and that the name is not all sex and money.
I know that of course. Malfoy's are also good looking.
But, he is still convinced that I am slacking off and becoming to spoilt and have no promise to take over the family business (!). So, he intends to introduce me into his social group this summer to make sure I am not a complete failure.
He should listen to the girls moan my name. Then he'd know what carrying the Malfoy name is REALLY all about.
XX
July 7,
Going home to summer break. These trains really do not have compartments fit for me to sit in for such long durations.
Paid Potter and his friends a visit of course. I still don't get why Weasley acts so surprised every time I stand at their door. I do it every year.
Or maybe he's just astonished and my amazingly good looks. I always knew he was somewhat of a puff, following Potter around like that.
XX
July 8,
Chris came to visit. I've not seen her like this since her father died. Her eyes were red, and her face stained from running mascara. She had been crying.
She refused to tell me what's the matter. She only asked for a room and a cup of tea.
How could I refuse? She's not like all the others. She's like my sister. She's been with my family since we were five. My mother adores her. So I owe her.
XX
July 12,
Chris' brother has joined the death eaters. She saw the dark mark imprinted on his arm when he was asleep and instantly all the thoughts of her father, his coldness, his unfeeling ness all returned to her. She couldn't bear to stay here.
I will let her stay with me.
No one deserves what families like us have to go through. Sometimes I feel the money isn't worth it. Not even.
XX
July 16,
Chris has gone home again. I promised to check up on her and let her know that she will always have mother and I.
But I am not at a loss for company. Brock took the opportunity to stop by and discuss a new proposition with me.
By proposition of course he means another way to embarrass me and prove that I am not so high and mighty. I accepted. By accepting I intend to, once again, beat him at his own game and show him just how good I can be.
It should be a simple plan. Steal Harry Potter's most fanatic admirer: Ginny Weasley, and have sex with her. She sticks to him, admires every breath he takes, and is rumoured to collect his stray hairs.
Do I doubt for any minute that it will not be as easy as the other ones?
Not even a bit.
We've bet on a Nimbus 3000. And I know for sure that by the end of the term I will have it. Good thing too, I've been getting bored with the same old brooms.
She will be a piece of cake.
XX

Ginny chuckled as she read his description of her.

He was right. She was a piece of cake. She had fell right into his plan. Helping her get Harry? More like helping him win his broom. Even down to having sex with him, she had fallen right into his lap.

What a fool she had been. Tiredly she closed the book. It was after 3am. She should get some sleep.

3:30 and she hadn't shut her eyes for more than a minute.

She couldn't sleep. Not with knowing how much he used her. She needed to know more. To know everything he thought while he treated her like a piece of meat. Even if it hurt her.

September 2,
On the train back to Hogwarts. Father has paid for the school to install a compartment specially made for me, spacious and comfy. Mother made sure to fill it with all kinds of sweets. As juvenile as it sounds, at least she put some effort into making it as comfortable as it can be.
Visited Potter and his friends. I'm even getting sick of doing that. The same old routine. I open the carriage and stand in the door. They all jump thinking its Voldermort or something spooky along those lines. They realise its me, Weasley sneers and Miss Smart knickers makes a wise ass crack while Potter asks what I want this time.
They really should come up with some more material.
I met Weasley in my carriage. I thought I'd have to wait till school to get started on the bet, but fate has brought her right to me. Things are always on my side.
I look at her sleeping next to me and smile. She was crying when I came in, over Potter, obviously. New plan: I pretend to help her with Potter and let my manly charm take over her, till the sound of my name is absolutely orgasmic.
She won't be able to help it, she's just a girl. And she won't be able to see through me. She's just a Weasley after all.
XX
October 22,
LONGBOTTOM THE CULPRIT? You have to be fucking kidding me!
Well, really, it's always the good ones that turn out to be worst. One of Dumbledore's chosen few. Ha!
Still… LONGBOTTOM?
XX
October 23,
How do you win back Potter? Make him jealous of course.
How do I win over Weasley? Pretend to help her to make Potter jealous, while exciting every sexual cell in her body till she's so madly driven to the peak of her sensual sensations that she tears my clothes off my body and practically pushes me into her.
That's my plan.
Where do we do this? The best place to do this. Illegal party. Night time, when she's chilly and has nothing else to do but to cuddle up to me and smell my scent while she nuzzles into my neck. With some available alcohol, to soften her reflexes and amplify her sexual desire.
Of course she holds some for me. I can tell. Everyone does.. Even down to McGonagall… as disturbing as that may sound.
XX
October 24,
Note to self:
When providing Gryffindor's innocent infant with alcohol be sure to keep it at a minimum as she is a pathetic lightweight and will ruin the perfect finale to my plan by heaving up everything she has eaten into a bucket when the two of us were engaged in some hot foreplay.
XX
December 7,
Fighting with Potter.
Almost beat his ass as well.
Even though I was the one with the broken nose.
Good news: I am successfully into the Weasley's abode for a Christmas long opportunity to win the bet. And my Christmas present? My prized nimbus 3000 and one more girl to add to my trophy closet.
Not bad.
XX
December 7 again,
Chris has sent me a note. My mother has overheard my father talking to the Dark Lord about me joining the Death eaters this Christmas and she intends to stop it one way another.
Chris has begged me not to give in to the dark side. I can very comfortably enjoy my life without being a servant to anyone else.
I wish I could promise that to her, but she has no idea what a tyrant my father can be.
Instead I ask her to keep close tabs on mother and meet me in Diagon Alley the following day.
XX
December 8,
Ginny is infuriatingly jealous at Chris.
She is convinced that I am madly in love with her and that I cannot help it.
Chris is gorgeous, I agree. But she lacks character I suppose, and she is closer to me as a sister than as a love interest. A sister that I have sex with occasionally.
Ginny left reluctantly when I asked to speak to Chris alone. And when I met up with her as I promised she was still angry with jealousy. But as I placed a lingering kiss on her lips she melted into my arms. Like they all do.
Chris agreed to help mother and I.
XX

As she read, Ginny could still feel his sweet lips on hers, and began melting all over again.

His charm was something she had anticipated, but still she could not protect herself from it. He had been right, she melted into him. There was no way she couldn't.

She continued reading too indulged to put it down.

December 8,
I can't sleep.
I must be mad, but when Ginny tried that dress on in Madame Chantal's I was filled with admiration. At that moment, I wasn't just looking at a Weasley, or a sex toy, I was looking at beauty. Pure and fresh. Her milky skin dotted with freckles, her slender form fitting flawlessly under its flow-y fabric, her red curls delicately falling unto her face. And the look that she gave, so insecure. Even now as I close my eyes all I can see is her image, burning itself into my brains so that I can think of nothing else.
And I don't think I would want to.
XX
December 8,
Nonsense that's just a tired mind talking. Thank God I know that.
XX
December 9,
Found the bitch sleeping with Potter. What I would do to her at that moment! Her eyes are closed, and she has a smile on her face as she sleeps. Writing in this diary is the only thing I can do to not make me scream and break every bone in her body.
I am not jealous in the least. Not at all.
BUT I WILL NOT STAND HERE AND WATCH THIS!
XX
December 9,
Something is wrong with me. I am very worried.
She practically invited me to have sex with her, in disguise as having a shower together. And what happens? I turn into some pussy and back out.
I panicked. This has never happened before. I kept hearing her voice over and over in my head and something swept over me guilt I think they call it. And I backed out.
What does this mean? What could this mean?
Why must things be so difficult?
XX

She pondered for a moment. What could that have meant?

December 20,
Fleur is here.
Fuck.
XX
December 23,
Back at Malfoy manor. Chris has said that mother is definitely planning something and that I should come home. So here I am.
Funnily enough, I can't concentrate. I think I have reached the depths of depression. I'd rather not do anything if it means being away from her. Being here makes me realise how much I enjoy her company, her humour, her smile, her smell, her.
… And it's interfering with the bet. Of course.
XX
24 December,
Returned to Malfoy Manor.
Ginny is now Harry Potter's girlfriend. And I have a blue spot on my face from being knocked out by her brother.
Merry Christmas to me.
XX
1 January,
As my New Years present Father has taken me to a death eater initiation ceremony and I am now imprinted with the dark mark.
I'm not sure what I think about all this. Though what I think has never seemed to matter to Father.
One thing is sure: I will serve no one.

She stopped and thought of that day he showed her the mark and shivers spread all over her. She had always seen Death Eaters to be heartless evil men.

But she had known Draco and he was neither. Her heart couldn't help but contract in pain, and she wondered how he was coping all on his own.

But it was his fault. He had put a broom before her. That could keep him company. He deserved it. But even as she whispered it to herself a tear still fell from her face. Trying to keep her emotions for welling over, she continued reading yet again.

XX
10 January,
Her hair is straight now. Why? Potter.
I can't believe she doesn't see how much more she's worth. How much more she could have.
If she was with me

He did not continue.

XX
20 January,
Mother has gone missing.
I have no idea what to do.
I'm not one to believe in superstitions but my throat is dry and I have a bad feeling deep in the pit of my stomach.
I know the worst is yet to come.
XX
20 January,
I SWEAR WHEN I FIND WHOEVER DID THIS, EVEN IF IT IS VOLDERMORT HIMSELF I WILL GUT THEM PERSONALLY! TAKE EVERY INCH OF THEIR BODY AND TEAR IT TO SHREDS!
But even that won't bring my mother back. The only person I have ever loved, the only person who has loved me back.
I would rather be dead.
XX
21 January,
How can it be that a woman can make a man feel so good that nothing else matters?
Last night I had the most arousing, passionate, personal and intimate experiences of my life. With her. And when I woke up this morning she was the first thing I thought of. And when I smile she is the only thing I think of.
Could it be love? I can't help but think it is.
Fancy that.
XX
21 January,
I hate her. I hate her. I hate her. No amount can represent just how much I hate her.
To say to me that it meant nothing special. She was not what I thought. I thought she was an angel, a beauty, caring and loving. She's not. She's a whore. Nothing more. Fucking slut.
But when I think why I hate her so much something in the back of my mind whispers that it's because I love her.
How cruel can the world be?
XX
22 January,
So what did I do? Exactly what she deserves. To be treated like a piece of meat. By right, I have won the bet and I intended to collect my prize.
And as I hold my brand new broom in the palms of my hands I can say with all conviction, I have won the bet.
She was nothing special.
XX

That was the last page. She sighed heavily and wiped a tear from her eyes. Her hands which held the diary were shaking. She had just read all of Malfoys thoughts concerning everything he thought was important.

And what had she found out? Maybe he did love her once, but what good was that when he hated her now?

It was even worse knowing that she could have had him, and she had ruined it.

Defeated she closed the book, but as she flipped the pages shut she noticed that there was one further back, randomly placed, sloppy, large handwriting, with blood stains all over it.

This page was definitely different from the last.

Sorry I cant post any thank you's since I'm in a rush but thanks to everyone who read it!

As for Ginny being too beautiful, I don't think I've made her beautiful but everyone has that own distinct look that makes them pretty in their own way. Ginny's a little on the plain side and she doesn't see herself as beautiful but to some people she is.