This is now up for the third time XD, but this time I´ve been spending alot more time editing the fic after uploading it, so that it is
easier to read for you, the readers ;). I do hope that this won´t be taken down for yet another time and that I´ll get banned ( :( ), but I really like this fic and how it is going so I´ll add it once more.
If it is taken down yet again...I hope I haven´t used all my warnings and that I will still be able to post others of my fictions that I´ll probably write.

If there´s something you don´t like or find inappropriate for a rating of "R" then please send me an email or review and I will fix it, don´t just report my fic instantly, please? I am asking you for just a small favour here that will probably increase both your and my experience of this fic.

Disclaimer: I don´t own Azumanga Daioh and this counts for every chapter I add to this story.

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"Those were the days."

Kasuga Ayumu looked at the words she had written down. They where referring to the days of high school she had been experiencing with her friends.
She always remembered those days of happiness with a wide smile and a dreamy look in her eyes.
Those days of fun,when they had been together everyday. They had no worries,not a single concern in their lives.
What had mattered was the now,what they were doing right there...It had been so wonderful.

Ayumu always remembered them with a smile,but...after a while she would look at the now,at her grey-yellow walls.
She´d look around herself and see her gray,sad appartment...her one room...her confinement.
She´d be remembered of the bills,the eviction threats and her empty fridge.

Yes,she´d always remember those days with a smile.

And then she would cry.

Feeling the sadness build up in her again Ayumu looked at the words on the paper in front of her.
They were supposed to be the beginning of her book...The book she had tried to write a thousand times...

It had always started with those words...mostly because that is how she felt about them.
Those WERE the days...the only time she´d been really happy...

Scrolling back through time, Ayumu remembered the day when they went from her first year to her second.
How worried she had been for the possibility of being separated from her friends,she hadn´t slept, she had been a wreck.

And when they were standing in front of the class lists and she didn´t see her name...her whole world had ended at that moment.She would never be happy again, of that she was sure, never again would she laugh with the others.
Her life had flashed before her, the part she considered worth remembering, her days with the other girls all flew by her,day after day,every last blissfilled day.

Untill Yomi,blessed Yomi, had pointed out that Yukari had written her up as Osaka.Tears welled up in Ayumu´s eyes as she remembered the nickname she´d always been called by after that first day.
Ayumu started chuckling at her own air-headedness...

"Chiyo-chan...Sakaki-san...Yomi-chan...Tomo-chan...Kagura-san...Sensei"...

As the faces flew by her vision,all smiling like they had those days, the chuckling eventually became sobs and Ayumu grabbed the sides of her head...

The sobs ravaged the petite body untill it constantly shook, and not for the first time it happened that tears started blurring out the letters written on the paper.

Eventually the crying subsided,the words on the paper were now nothing more than inkstains,mocking her pathetic life.
A growl from her stomach told Ayumu that she should feed her body,but she ignored it.
Forcing herself she rose from the chair she was sitting in,she glanced outside the window and saw that it was snowing again.

A sad smile grew on her lips as she watched the small spots of white against the black background of the night forest behind her appartment.
This was just why Ayumu had moved to Hokkaido,the weather and the nature.

Snow had always cheered Ayumu up,she didn´t know why, but being out in the crisp, cold air with snow coming down from the winter nightsky had always been one of the few things able to cheer her up.

With a look of disgust Ayumu looked around her appartment.

It had yellow-grayish walls,a brown study desk that had seen better days, a kitchen bench with a small stove with one plate, a small fridge with a few soft drinks and cup ramens in it, a greenish sofa that she pulled out to sleep on when she had to and a small tv-set set she´d never used during the years she´d have it.

With no further ado Osaka grabbed her coat and put on her shoes.
Neither was very good protection against the cold,but she didn´t care,she was going to mix with the snow.

Like she had done so many times before.

As she opened the door the cold air greeted her with promises of well being.
The snow fell heavily on her brown hair as she ran behind the building.
She ran untill she came to a big,flat rock up by the edge of the forest,about 40 metres away from the building.

With some work she managed to climb on top of it.
When she had seated her self with her legs stretched out Ayumu sat and just felt the snow all around her for some time.
When the usual drowsiness began to get to her she stuck her hand into her pocket and searched a little while.

A sudden,sharp pain in her finger told her she´d found what she had been searching for.
When she pulled out her han again it had a cut at the end of her thumb, as well as a razor blade in it.

Chuckling sleepily she said "hehehe,oh no...I cut myself...haha..."

Then she pulled up her right sleeve and displayed her pale,blueish,scarred wrist.
Her wrist was covered in scars from other times like this.

Her experienced hand lead the blade till it was at her wrist,then with precise motions she started cutting several long,deep scars that bled heavily.
The dark,red liquid flowed unto her pants and unto the snow.
As the blood flowed out of her,Ayumu felt her depressed self also flow out of her,little by little as so many times before.

This time however there was a lot more blood.
"Good...more of me disappears...into the snow...I am one with the snow..."

Suddenly her vision was getting blurry and hurriedly it faded.
Swaying, Ayumu threw a last look at her window, there was light there, and...people?...who could that be?...who would come to visi...

Ayumu never finished the thought because her body couldn´t take anymore.

As her head smashed into the icy rock she heard Chiyo call her nickname..."Osakaaaaaaa!"

The world faded into black...