Disclaimer: Why bother? It's not mine.
A/N: Yay, I got some reviews! I'm so glad that a few people actually liked it, that's all I needed. Uhhh.I don't really know what else to say. I'd had this all typed up before I posted the first chapter and I've only got a little more typed after this, so I don't know when I'll update again. I'll write as fast as I can and try to get it up soon. Not that you care, though ( because this still sucks, lol. Enjoy!
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The remainder of the day passed without great event. Fortunately, I didn't see Potter and co. until dinner. I did, however, come into communication with the Weasley.
She didn't like me, and I didn't like her. I obviously hadn't forgotten the whole Bat-Bogey thing at the end of fifth year; that was annoying, let me tell you.
However, I had nothing to do, and she was someone to talk to, so whatever. At least it wasn't Potter.
So at dinner that night, it was inevitable that I'd have to see Potter again. And, alas, I did.
I also met Bill and Charlie Weasley. Kind of; I didn't talk to them. They were there, though, in case you were wondering. Yeah. But Weasley (as in the Weasel, I swear, there are so many damn Weasleys) kept flicking peas at my head. Immaturity is such a problem in today's youth.
So, when Mrs. Weasley and Tonks weren't looking, I threw a stick of butter at him. It's not like I wasn't provoked.
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And so passed much of the summer. The only people present that could look at me without practically choking, other than Tonks, were Charlie, Bill, and Ginny Weasley, and Ginny was the only one that was always there.
It was kind of depressing.
One day, my darling Gryffindors and I were in The Room watching Jack Frost, a strange movie about this psycho murdering snowman. Actually, that's a lie; only Potter and the Weasel were watching it. Ginny was doing a crossword puzzle in the back of the Quibbler and kept asking Granger and me the answers.
She frowned down at the magazine. "Hey Malfoy?"
"Yes Weasley?"
"What popular candy is rumored to be an aphrodisiac?"
That was easy. "Sugar quills. They make you horny." Granger rolled her eyes. "Excuse me, Granger, they do."
"Oh really? And how would you know?"
She was so obviously coming on to me. "I've experienced their effects," I lied.
And so I began my long-winded, completely untrue story about how a Veela had seduced me with sugar quills during the DE attack at the Quidditch World Cup. "And then all these people started swarming into the forest and they were coming near us, and it was like so ruined, but I told you Granger the sugar quill thing is true," I finished. Lying is amusing beyond measure.
Granger rolled her eyes at me again. "Not a word of that was true."
"People went into the forest, you were there, YOU SAW IT. Besides, why did you think I was already there when you got there?" I smirked.
"I meant the Veela thing. It was a lie."
"So?" I'd kind of gotten it from a muggle book I saw at this store once. It was called 'How to Have Sex in the Woods'. It was actually quite amusing.
Granger sighed. Ginny went back to her quiz. I knew they loved my witticisms; they just didn't know it.
At dinner that night, I was describing in detail to Ginny just what her type was, since she had been complaining about how all the guys she knew were losers (obviously I wasn't included in this statement).
"And he's going to be a huge, burly, muscular type with all brawn and no brains, and all he'll talk about is Quidditch. That's why he'll like you, you see."
Ginny looked confused. "Why, because he likes Quidditch?"
"No, because he has no brain."
Ginny smacked me; and you know what, that girl packed a serious punch. She didn't hit as hard as Granger, of course, but thank God for that.
A few minutes later, Ginny looked up again from across the table. "Malfoy?"
"Weasley?"
She smirked at Granger, who was sitting next to her. "What do you think Hermione's type is?"
I thought for a moment, trying to decide what would annoy Granger the most. "A horny sex god, if you want to know what I think."
Granger choked on a roll. See what I mean? Choking, everyone's always choking around me. "Excuse me?"
"It's true, Granger. All those times you've been reading Hogwarts, A History, you thought I never saw that copy of Playwitch you're really looking at? I'm not blind you know."
"You are such a pervert."
"I know."
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And before I knew it (yeah right), it was August 31, and my precious summer was over. True, it was, like, the worst summer ever, but it was better than school.
Plus, I was going to miss the TV. I really was.
I was sitting on the counter in the kitchen, just minding my own business (for the time being). I was supposed to be looking for my advanced Herbology book, but I didn't feel like it.
Granger came marching in, looking panic-stricken. "Where's my Defense Against the Dark Arts book?"
I raised an eyebrow and looked at her. "Okay. HOW the hell would I know?"
Granger was annoyed. She turned around and stalked out of the kitchen.
At first I just figured that Tonks was rubbing off on her. Except instead of in the morning, she gets moody at night.
But then I reminded myself that one of her *books* was missing. After all, she was Granger.
Then I remember that my book was missing too, and I'd be uber screwed if I didn't find it, so I searched for it again.
On my quest, I came across God knows whose collection of Playwizard mags. I swear; if I'm not in the company of people that hate me, then it's sex maniacs.
Sometime after the Playwizards, I found my book. Go figure.
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I was arisen far too early the next morning. Ginny ran in (on Tonks' orders, no doubt, heartless peon) and started jumping on the couch and beating me up with a pillow.
On his way down the stairs, Potter saw this and took the opportunity to throw my radio at my head, then just leave.
I got hit in the head quite a few times, let me tell you.
Ginny dragged me off the couch (wooden floor, that's all I'll say) and trotted out the door. Giddiness sometimes makes me queasy in the morning.
Tonks force-fed me toast once I was in the kitchen, then stalked off somewhere, looking annoyed.
Lupin didn't even have to look up from his newspaper. "She needs some coffee."
"No kidding."
"Why don't you make some." It was quite obviously a command, not a question. Werewolves are such freeloaders. He only wanted it for himself.
"You know I'm banned from the appliances." I scowled. He so brought that up on purpose.
Lupin smirked. "Oh yes, I forgot." And all the Gryffindors thought he was nice.
"Sure ya did."
Granger looked up from the table, eyebrows raised. "Why aren't you allowed to use the appliances?"
"Tonks tried to kill me last time because I blew up the microwave and almost burned down the house," I said bitterly. It WASN'T MY FAULT.
"With a microwave?" Granger said incredulously.
"They're vessels of evil," I spat, glaring at the demon instrument.
Granger stared, I nodded. Lupin sighed and waved his wand. A pot of coffee appeared on the table. I tackled it and joyously poured some into a mug.
Potter, Granger, Weasel, and Weasley all stared at me as I spooned sugar into my coffee. "Can I help you?"
They didn't say anything? Tonks entered the room, her creepy magenta hair glaring spitefully at me. Or it would have been, could hair glare spitefully.
In a frightening likeness to myself, she attacked the pot of coffee. But nooo, did they stare at her? Nope.
I sometimes wonder why I always feel the need to include pointless cameos and details. Oh well.
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Sometime later, we found ourselves on the Hogwarts Express. I looked for the first opportunity that arose to finally escape from the Gryffindors, but alas, it was to no avail. For we had to go to some Prefect meeting.
And so, leaving Potter alone (haha), Granger, Weasley & Weasley and I departed for the meeting.
I don't really understand the point of Prefect meetings. It's not like we ever get anything done.
The second I stepped through the door, Pansy threw herself at me. She started going on about how much she'd missed me over the summer, but I wasn't really listening.
It wasn't like I could have cared less.
So I just sat there throughout the entire meeting, the Heads trying to make themselves heard over the screams of what's his face from Hufflepuff as Goldstein tried to choke/smother him with a quill.
We were kind of used to things like that randomly occurring. Don't ask.
I'll repeat my feelings on the Prefect meetings. We never do anything; it just doesn't make sense. Kind of like morning sickness. It doesn't even happen in the morning.
Actually, it does happen in the morning. But all the rest of the time, too. They should just call it all-the-time sickness.
But whatever. That's just my opinion.
Once Hufflepuff managed to escape, we assumed it was alright for us to take our leave.
Crabbe and Goyle were too stupid. Pansy was too clingy. And I wasn't in the mood for sitting alone and brooding about my life. So I went with Granger, Weasley, and Weasley.
You probably would have, too.
The thing I don't get is why everything always has to do with Titanic.
Which is why, somehow, I found myself in the midst of a heated debate with Granger about Jack's true sexual orientation. See, I honestly felt that he was gayer than gay, and that he only wanted to shag Rose because he wasn't prepared to come out of the closet yet. Granger, however, disagreed.
And that was why I felt the need to convince her that I was right and she was wrong, end of story.
"WELL then, Granger, if he was straight, then why was he so keen to shag her? Hmm?"
She rolled her eyes at me. "Malfoy, that made no sense. If he was gay, he would have wanted to shag the Italian bloke, not Rose."
And she was supposed to be smart or something. "See, that's the point. He didn't want his friend to find out, so he tried to cover it all up with Rose. Read between the lines." Or watch it. Details, details.
But no, she just refuse to see the truth. "How do you know?"
"It's easy to tell. Go watch the movie with your eyes open and you'll see what I mean. Why else would he shag her? I mean, she was a brat."
Granger rolled her eyes again and glared at me. "Maybe because he.oh, I don't know. Loved her? Not that I'd expect you to understand."
That was cold, Granger. But I ignored the insult; I had a point to make. An important one, at that. "After.what? A few days, at the most. And if you still don't think he's gay, I've only go tone more reason for the shagging, and I'll assure you, you won't like it."
Throughout all this, fortunately, Potter and Weasley remained engrossed in their Quidditch-themed conversation. Simple-minded peasants. Weasley II had abandoned here ever-present Quibbler copy for a much more satisfying form of entertainment: Granger and me.
"Oh really?" Granger's voice was thick with sarcasm. "And what's that?"
I smirked. "Sugar quills."
Weasley and I both started sniggering. Granger put her hand over her eyes. "You are such a moron, Malfoy."
"You're just mad because I won." I smirked again.
"Sure you did."
What with our stimulating debate, we hadn't realized how much time had gone by. In fact, just as Weasley was pulling out the latest edition of the Quibbler (I swear, I have no idea), we pulled into the station.
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A/N: *rolls eyes* I don't know, my mom has a Titanic thing. I just think it's funny. But the thing about Jack being gay is true (sorry Hermione, you're wrong), if you don't think he is.you're wrong too. Lol. I got three reviews!
demonic innocence: Hey thanks! The Titanic thing was actually written from my own experience.O.o heh heh don't ask. If you're still out there (not that I'd blame you if you're not reading this, it's bad!), I hope you enjoyed this chapter!
RikuNghts: Thanks, I was really worried about it being too OOC. But for anyone ELSE that's like "Blaaaaaaah this is stupid it's OOC" well you may be right, but remember, it's DRACO's POV! It'll be different! That wasn't meant toward you personally though, lol, thanks for the review. I'm glad you liked it.
fairy-princess7: Thank you for the compliment, but I deserve to beat myself up for calling this a story because it's STUPID! I'm sorry, like I said, I have a complex, I can't like anything I make. Thanks though.
You three rock! To anyone else that might be reading this, it'd be really cool if you could please take a sec (or two or three) to review. Thank you!
A/N: Yay, I got some reviews! I'm so glad that a few people actually liked it, that's all I needed. Uhhh.I don't really know what else to say. I'd had this all typed up before I posted the first chapter and I've only got a little more typed after this, so I don't know when I'll update again. I'll write as fast as I can and try to get it up soon. Not that you care, though ( because this still sucks, lol. Enjoy!
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The remainder of the day passed without great event. Fortunately, I didn't see Potter and co. until dinner. I did, however, come into communication with the Weasley.
She didn't like me, and I didn't like her. I obviously hadn't forgotten the whole Bat-Bogey thing at the end of fifth year; that was annoying, let me tell you.
However, I had nothing to do, and she was someone to talk to, so whatever. At least it wasn't Potter.
So at dinner that night, it was inevitable that I'd have to see Potter again. And, alas, I did.
I also met Bill and Charlie Weasley. Kind of; I didn't talk to them. They were there, though, in case you were wondering. Yeah. But Weasley (as in the Weasel, I swear, there are so many damn Weasleys) kept flicking peas at my head. Immaturity is such a problem in today's youth.
So, when Mrs. Weasley and Tonks weren't looking, I threw a stick of butter at him. It's not like I wasn't provoked.
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And so passed much of the summer. The only people present that could look at me without practically choking, other than Tonks, were Charlie, Bill, and Ginny Weasley, and Ginny was the only one that was always there.
It was kind of depressing.
One day, my darling Gryffindors and I were in The Room watching Jack Frost, a strange movie about this psycho murdering snowman. Actually, that's a lie; only Potter and the Weasel were watching it. Ginny was doing a crossword puzzle in the back of the Quibbler and kept asking Granger and me the answers.
She frowned down at the magazine. "Hey Malfoy?"
"Yes Weasley?"
"What popular candy is rumored to be an aphrodisiac?"
That was easy. "Sugar quills. They make you horny." Granger rolled her eyes. "Excuse me, Granger, they do."
"Oh really? And how would you know?"
She was so obviously coming on to me. "I've experienced their effects," I lied.
And so I began my long-winded, completely untrue story about how a Veela had seduced me with sugar quills during the DE attack at the Quidditch World Cup. "And then all these people started swarming into the forest and they were coming near us, and it was like so ruined, but I told you Granger the sugar quill thing is true," I finished. Lying is amusing beyond measure.
Granger rolled her eyes at me again. "Not a word of that was true."
"People went into the forest, you were there, YOU SAW IT. Besides, why did you think I was already there when you got there?" I smirked.
"I meant the Veela thing. It was a lie."
"So?" I'd kind of gotten it from a muggle book I saw at this store once. It was called 'How to Have Sex in the Woods'. It was actually quite amusing.
Granger sighed. Ginny went back to her quiz. I knew they loved my witticisms; they just didn't know it.
At dinner that night, I was describing in detail to Ginny just what her type was, since she had been complaining about how all the guys she knew were losers (obviously I wasn't included in this statement).
"And he's going to be a huge, burly, muscular type with all brawn and no brains, and all he'll talk about is Quidditch. That's why he'll like you, you see."
Ginny looked confused. "Why, because he likes Quidditch?"
"No, because he has no brain."
Ginny smacked me; and you know what, that girl packed a serious punch. She didn't hit as hard as Granger, of course, but thank God for that.
A few minutes later, Ginny looked up again from across the table. "Malfoy?"
"Weasley?"
She smirked at Granger, who was sitting next to her. "What do you think Hermione's type is?"
I thought for a moment, trying to decide what would annoy Granger the most. "A horny sex god, if you want to know what I think."
Granger choked on a roll. See what I mean? Choking, everyone's always choking around me. "Excuse me?"
"It's true, Granger. All those times you've been reading Hogwarts, A History, you thought I never saw that copy of Playwitch you're really looking at? I'm not blind you know."
"You are such a pervert."
"I know."
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And before I knew it (yeah right), it was August 31, and my precious summer was over. True, it was, like, the worst summer ever, but it was better than school.
Plus, I was going to miss the TV. I really was.
I was sitting on the counter in the kitchen, just minding my own business (for the time being). I was supposed to be looking for my advanced Herbology book, but I didn't feel like it.
Granger came marching in, looking panic-stricken. "Where's my Defense Against the Dark Arts book?"
I raised an eyebrow and looked at her. "Okay. HOW the hell would I know?"
Granger was annoyed. She turned around and stalked out of the kitchen.
At first I just figured that Tonks was rubbing off on her. Except instead of in the morning, she gets moody at night.
But then I reminded myself that one of her *books* was missing. After all, she was Granger.
Then I remember that my book was missing too, and I'd be uber screwed if I didn't find it, so I searched for it again.
On my quest, I came across God knows whose collection of Playwizard mags. I swear; if I'm not in the company of people that hate me, then it's sex maniacs.
Sometime after the Playwizards, I found my book. Go figure.
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I was arisen far too early the next morning. Ginny ran in (on Tonks' orders, no doubt, heartless peon) and started jumping on the couch and beating me up with a pillow.
On his way down the stairs, Potter saw this and took the opportunity to throw my radio at my head, then just leave.
I got hit in the head quite a few times, let me tell you.
Ginny dragged me off the couch (wooden floor, that's all I'll say) and trotted out the door. Giddiness sometimes makes me queasy in the morning.
Tonks force-fed me toast once I was in the kitchen, then stalked off somewhere, looking annoyed.
Lupin didn't even have to look up from his newspaper. "She needs some coffee."
"No kidding."
"Why don't you make some." It was quite obviously a command, not a question. Werewolves are such freeloaders. He only wanted it for himself.
"You know I'm banned from the appliances." I scowled. He so brought that up on purpose.
Lupin smirked. "Oh yes, I forgot." And all the Gryffindors thought he was nice.
"Sure ya did."
Granger looked up from the table, eyebrows raised. "Why aren't you allowed to use the appliances?"
"Tonks tried to kill me last time because I blew up the microwave and almost burned down the house," I said bitterly. It WASN'T MY FAULT.
"With a microwave?" Granger said incredulously.
"They're vessels of evil," I spat, glaring at the demon instrument.
Granger stared, I nodded. Lupin sighed and waved his wand. A pot of coffee appeared on the table. I tackled it and joyously poured some into a mug.
Potter, Granger, Weasel, and Weasley all stared at me as I spooned sugar into my coffee. "Can I help you?"
They didn't say anything? Tonks entered the room, her creepy magenta hair glaring spitefully at me. Or it would have been, could hair glare spitefully.
In a frightening likeness to myself, she attacked the pot of coffee. But nooo, did they stare at her? Nope.
I sometimes wonder why I always feel the need to include pointless cameos and details. Oh well.
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Sometime later, we found ourselves on the Hogwarts Express. I looked for the first opportunity that arose to finally escape from the Gryffindors, but alas, it was to no avail. For we had to go to some Prefect meeting.
And so, leaving Potter alone (haha), Granger, Weasley & Weasley and I departed for the meeting.
I don't really understand the point of Prefect meetings. It's not like we ever get anything done.
The second I stepped through the door, Pansy threw herself at me. She started going on about how much she'd missed me over the summer, but I wasn't really listening.
It wasn't like I could have cared less.
So I just sat there throughout the entire meeting, the Heads trying to make themselves heard over the screams of what's his face from Hufflepuff as Goldstein tried to choke/smother him with a quill.
We were kind of used to things like that randomly occurring. Don't ask.
I'll repeat my feelings on the Prefect meetings. We never do anything; it just doesn't make sense. Kind of like morning sickness. It doesn't even happen in the morning.
Actually, it does happen in the morning. But all the rest of the time, too. They should just call it all-the-time sickness.
But whatever. That's just my opinion.
Once Hufflepuff managed to escape, we assumed it was alright for us to take our leave.
Crabbe and Goyle were too stupid. Pansy was too clingy. And I wasn't in the mood for sitting alone and brooding about my life. So I went with Granger, Weasley, and Weasley.
You probably would have, too.
The thing I don't get is why everything always has to do with Titanic.
Which is why, somehow, I found myself in the midst of a heated debate with Granger about Jack's true sexual orientation. See, I honestly felt that he was gayer than gay, and that he only wanted to shag Rose because he wasn't prepared to come out of the closet yet. Granger, however, disagreed.
And that was why I felt the need to convince her that I was right and she was wrong, end of story.
"WELL then, Granger, if he was straight, then why was he so keen to shag her? Hmm?"
She rolled her eyes at me. "Malfoy, that made no sense. If he was gay, he would have wanted to shag the Italian bloke, not Rose."
And she was supposed to be smart or something. "See, that's the point. He didn't want his friend to find out, so he tried to cover it all up with Rose. Read between the lines." Or watch it. Details, details.
But no, she just refuse to see the truth. "How do you know?"
"It's easy to tell. Go watch the movie with your eyes open and you'll see what I mean. Why else would he shag her? I mean, she was a brat."
Granger rolled her eyes again and glared at me. "Maybe because he.oh, I don't know. Loved her? Not that I'd expect you to understand."
That was cold, Granger. But I ignored the insult; I had a point to make. An important one, at that. "After.what? A few days, at the most. And if you still don't think he's gay, I've only go tone more reason for the shagging, and I'll assure you, you won't like it."
Throughout all this, fortunately, Potter and Weasley remained engrossed in their Quidditch-themed conversation. Simple-minded peasants. Weasley II had abandoned here ever-present Quibbler copy for a much more satisfying form of entertainment: Granger and me.
"Oh really?" Granger's voice was thick with sarcasm. "And what's that?"
I smirked. "Sugar quills."
Weasley and I both started sniggering. Granger put her hand over her eyes. "You are such a moron, Malfoy."
"You're just mad because I won." I smirked again.
"Sure you did."
What with our stimulating debate, we hadn't realized how much time had gone by. In fact, just as Weasley was pulling out the latest edition of the Quibbler (I swear, I have no idea), we pulled into the station.
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A/N: *rolls eyes* I don't know, my mom has a Titanic thing. I just think it's funny. But the thing about Jack being gay is true (sorry Hermione, you're wrong), if you don't think he is.you're wrong too. Lol. I got three reviews!
demonic innocence: Hey thanks! The Titanic thing was actually written from my own experience.O.o heh heh don't ask. If you're still out there (not that I'd blame you if you're not reading this, it's bad!), I hope you enjoyed this chapter!
RikuNghts: Thanks, I was really worried about it being too OOC. But for anyone ELSE that's like "Blaaaaaaah this is stupid it's OOC" well you may be right, but remember, it's DRACO's POV! It'll be different! That wasn't meant toward you personally though, lol, thanks for the review. I'm glad you liked it.
fairy-princess7: Thank you for the compliment, but I deserve to beat myself up for calling this a story because it's STUPID! I'm sorry, like I said, I have a complex, I can't like anything I make. Thanks though.
You three rock! To anyone else that might be reading this, it'd be really cool if you could please take a sec (or two or three) to review. Thank you!