DISCLAIMER: I don't own Harry Potter, any of the characters. Nothing. It all belongs to J.K. Rowling.
"Severus!" Severus Snape halted in his tracks at the sound of the outraged voice. He turned slowly, keeping his hands where they could be seen. When he saw Minerva McGonagall standing in the middle of the cooridor, visibly shaking with, what was it? Fear or anger? he cursed.
"Minerva, believe me when I tell you, its not what it looks like." Snape said, lamely. Minerva scoffed.
"Oh, of course it isn't. Well what else could it be, Severus? Miss Granger there with her shirt half off, and your hand up her skirt?" At this, Hermione Granger came out from behind the dark Potions professor, buttoning her blouse and straightening her skirt.
"Oh! Professor McGonagall." She said, blushing madly. Her irate head of house spun on her heel.
"Put those robes back on, Miss Granger. You and Severus need to have a little chat with Professor Dumbledore." And with that, the two admonished residents of Hogwarts castle followed the clicking heels of a very angry Gryffindor.
Professor Dumbledore sat behind his desk, his hands clasped serenely in front of him, his blue eyes dull, not twinkling like they normally were. He listened with an inclined head as Professor McGonagall described to him what she had seen. Finally, Dumbledore sent the chattering Professor away, promising to punish them both. When he had shut the door behind her, he turned to the other two occupants of his office. Both were looking at the floor with shame, every now and then sneaking a peek at the other.
"Look at me, Severus, Miss Granger." Both looked up, and were both relieved and astonished to see the old Professor smiling, the old twinkle in his eyes again. Both heaved a sigh of relief.
"Now, would you two like to tell me exactly what caused this?" Hermione and Severus exchanged glances.
"Well, it started like this"
"Oy! Hermione! What the bloody hell is this?" Ron Weasley sputtered indignantly when he saw the pile of parchments in front of him. Hermione smiled.
"N.E.W.Ts are coming up, you know." Was all she said. Ron and Harry exchanged worried glances.
"Uh, yeah, Hermione. In about 7 months." Hermione smiled serenely. "Uh oh, Ron, she has that look."
"I know that we have seven months. But why not use those to study? I want the two of you to get the best jobs possible." She glared at them for a moment. "I know you can." Ron and Harry groaned.
"But all this, on top of all the work the Professors give the seventh years, we'll be swamped. And me and Ron-"
"Ron and I." Hermione interjected.
"Fine, Ron and I, we have Quidditch practice. I'm the team captain, Hermione!" Harry said, his voice raising.
"Don't you raise your voice at me, Harry Potter. If your the bloody Quidditch captain...Oh bugger." She said finally. "I give up. Just promise me that after Easter break you'll both study more?" Both boys nodded. Hermione would have to be satisfied with that. She went back to revising her Potions essay while Harry and Ron discussed the latest Quidditch news. Hermione was awake long after those two had gone to bed, rewriting and adding to her essay.
The next morning, Hermione slept through breakfast. Only Ginny's jumping on Hermione's bed and threatening with a water spell woke her in time to dress and race to the Potions dungeon. She arrived breathless, rumpled, and 5 minutes late. Snape desended on her like a tiger to fresh meat.
"Glad you cared to join us, Miss Granger." He said, coldly. "I'll have to take 10 points from Gryffindor, for your, late, entrance." Hermione blushed but sat down in the nearest available seat. For once, she didn't share a table with anyone.
"Now, as I was saying before Miss Granger so rudely interrupted, this is a N.E.W.T level potion. Anyone interested in getting even at least an Acceptable in Potions must be able to correctly brew this potion." At this, Hermione sat up a little straighter, determined to pay attention. "Here are the instructions." Snape waved his wand at the board, writing appeared. Another wave of his wand opened all the cabinents. "You have an hour and a half. Begin."
Hermione hurried over to the cabinent, selected her ingredients, and then rushed back to her table, wanting to begin on the potion immediately. She stirred her potion together, then decided to rest her head on her book while the potion simmered. She knew she wouldn't fall asleep. And that's where she was, 10 minutes later, as her cauldron boiled over and Professor Snape gave her detention for falling asleep in class.
"Well now, I don't see how this tells me what is going on." Professor Dumbledore said as he took a sip of tea.
"Of course it doesn't, not yet anyway." Severus said, taking a bite of a buiscut. Hermione grinned.
"We're getting to that."
"Oh no! I'm late for detention!" Hermione cried as she jumped up from the Gryffindor table, and ran from the Great Hall. Professor Snape hadn't been at dinner, so she just knew that he was cooking up something nasty for her detention. Thoughts of what this could be filled her head as she ran down the staircase towards the dungeons. As she turned the corner, she ran right into Professor Snape.
Both tumbled to the ground, Severus almost rolling into a backflip. Hermione sat up, hands clasped over her mouth in horror as he stiffly rose to his feet and dusted off his robes.
"What were you thinking, Miss Granger? You could have injured me, running like that. Use your head, girl. Now, 20 points from Gryffindor for your clearless lack of thought. That will have to do for punishment right now, because I am needed elsewhere. You get to help me. Put these on." He tossed her a small pair of dragonhide gloves, and swept away in a billow of black robes.
"What happened, Professor?" Hermione asked, breathless from trying to keep up with Snape. He didn't bother to slow down.
"A dangerous potion spill. And apparently I'm the only one capable to clean it up." Hermione frowned.
"Well if you're the only one capable, why'd you bring me?" Severus actually laughed.
"Don't flatter yourself, girl. However, you are capable yourself, for a student, and you were serving detention anyway. It was convienient." They'd reached the fourth floor cooridor, and Hermione could see the spill. It wasn't really all that large, but she knew that it must be harmful if they were taking such precautions. The small area was roped off, and she and Severus stepped over the rope. Severus conjured a few muggle towels, and tossed one to Hermione. She was puzzled.
"Why don't you just use a cleaning spell, Professor?" Severus looked up from where he was already kneeling on the ground.
"Because it is an unknown substance, a spell might backfire. You of all people should know that some potions react negatively to magic, because of their makeup. Besides, if we clean it up this way, I'll have more than adequate samples to tell me what this is. Now, start scrubbing." Hermione scowled at him, but did as she was told, kneeling down on the cold stone floor, and keeping her robes out of the way of the potion.
When she had finished scrubbing up all she could reach, she stood to stretch and move to a new place. She wasn't watching where she placed her feet, and heard her professor's shout of "Watch out!" too late. She slipped and fell right on her bottom in the middle of the puddle of potion, splashing both herself and Severus with the potion. Severus jumped to his feet, yelling at the top of his lungs. He scrubbed his skin furiously until he noticed that there were no adverse effects to the potion. He stopped scrubbing, and stood there, puzzled. His mistake, however, was thinking that there were no adverse effects. He discovered this when he looked at Hermione. She still sat in the middle of the puddle, her knees bent, making her skirt ride up and expose a fair amount of thigh. Severus swallowed hard as he saw the lustful stare that Hermione was giving him, and then gasped as his body had a serious reaction to the view in front of him. The last thing he saw before he turned from her was the way her shirt tightened across her breasts, how those breasts strained against the fabric, just as he was straining against his pants right then. Both cursed at the same time.
"A lust potion!"
"Ah! The plot thickens!" Dumbledore said. Hermione smiled.
"You have no idea." Severus said.
"Oh no. Oh no oh no oh no." Hermione wailed, her head in her hands. She was standing now, her forehead resting against the wall.
"Oh yes. Oh yes oh yes oh yes, Miss. Granger." Severus said sarcastically, as he tried to clean the remains of the potion from his clothes. Hermione glared at him.
"I never want to hear those words from you again, Severus." 'Oh shit.' She thought as she bit her tongue. 'I just called him Severus!'
"Well, I don't like this anymore that you do, Hermione. However, until I know what this was made from, we won't know how long it will last." Severus replied.
"Hm. I thought that you had to drink a love potion for it to work." Severus nodded.
"That's the case with normal love potions. However, something is in this potion that causes it to work just by touching skin. I'll have to run some tests on it, to find out the exact components."
"That is, if you can find some time between shags." Hermione gasped as the words escaped her lips. Severus goggled at her, then blushed.
"I'll forget you said that, Hermione, as I'm sure it's just the potion talking." Hermione grinned in spite of herself. She was now leaning against the wall, and having taken off her robe since it was covered in potion, was now standing before him in a quite see through shirt and short skirt. His throat tightened as he saw the expanse of thigh that was uncovered, and how her shirt was gaped open at the neck, showing the delicate skin between her pert breasts.
"I don't see how you're taking this so well." She remarked. He swallowed hard.
"Well, even though all I can think about right now is shagging you senseless against one of these walls, I am showing some restraint." 'Augh.' Severus thought. 'Restraint...restraining trousers...Ow...' "I'd rather wait until we reached my rooms." Hermione grinned recklessly.
"Race ya"
Hermione's eyes glazed over and she aquired a goofy grin on her face. Severus knew that she was about to recount their first session of lovemaking. He clapped his hand over her mouth.
"Honey, I don't think that Albus will want to know about our sex life."
"On the contrary, I would rather, er, enjoy-" Severus glared at the Headmaster.
"Honey, Albus wouldn't like to hear this." Hermione nodded. Albus looked disappointed.
Hermione lay in the king size bed, surrounded by Slytherin green silk sheets, and naked Severus. She didn't know which one was better.
"Mmmm." She sighed. "That was great." Severus nodded in agreement. "Well, at least for a man who I'm sure hasn't had sex in what, twenty years?" At this, Severus withdrew his arm from around her, and she sat up, holding the sheet to her chest. "Oh wait, I'm sorry. Never?" Severus jumped out of the bed, appalled.
"I'll have you know, I used to be quite the ladies man. I just had to put my personal life on hold to protect the students here."
"Oh yes, we need a sexually frustrated Potions professor running around. That makes me feel LOADS better." Hermione grinned.
"I am NOT sexually frustrated, Hermione Granger." Severus spat out.
"Oh yes, I'm sure that wanking regularly quenches your thirst for the female body." Severus turned beet red.
"Oh well, who all have you shagged in your years at Hogwarts?" Severus asked. Hermione blanched.
"And why does my sex life have anything to do with it?"
"Oh I don't know, maybe because I just had sex with you! I hope you know that I could tell you weren't a virgin." Hermione paled.
"Fine. If that makes you feel better, I wasn't!" Severus stopped. He hadn't thought that she would say this.
"Who was it, then?" Severus asked.
"If you have to know, your darling Draco." Severus paled, then turned blood red with fury.
"If he raped you, if he laid one finger on you inappropriately-" Severus howled. Hermione bit back a grin.
"Of course not. I'd be more broken up about it then. No, my family was on holiday in France last summer, and we ran into each other there. Outside of school, we became good friends. So, naturally, we had a quick shag." Severus cocked an eyebrow at her nonchalant way of describing her sexual encounter with Draco Malfoy. "But if you want to know, he was the only other one. Besides you." Severus smirked.
"I don't know if that's supposed to make me feel any better." Hermione grinned.
"I don't know either. Oh, come here, you...increasingly attractive man, you." Severus smirked, and stretched himself over the bed, letting the sheet fall from his body, crawling seductively over to Hermione. He pressed his lips to hers, and-
"Severus!" Hermione squealed. "Professor Dumbledore does NOT want to know about our sex life!" Severus looked over at the elderly Headmaster, who had his eyes closed and was slowly rocking back and forth in his chair. Hermione shuddered, then reached over and banged her fist on the desk. Albus opened his eyes, and smiled.
"Continue"
Classes were getting harder...oh excuse me. More difficult for them to sit through. All Hermione had to do was look at her professor, and he would go all pale and sweaty, and excuse himself from the room for about twenty minutes. Hermione herself had trouble concentrating in class, and would therefore recieve more detention. But, what went on in those detentions would come back to visit her in class, making her daydream, and then get more detention. It was a vicious cycle, but one that neither of them minded too much. This went on for about a month, Hermione getting a detention a night. Her record was shot clean through. But did she care? Not a bit.
During this time, the two lovebirds, oh, excuse me, lustbirds, were doing countless tests on the makeup of the lust potion. At least, like Hermione had first stated, when they could find time between shags. At first they thought the potion had been brewed by an ignorant younger student at Hogwarts. But soon they discovered the complex makeup of the potion. Severus claimed that it was so complicated that he didn't think that Hermione could make it, which had angered her. They'd had a nice row before they'd finished that detention with a round or two of angry sex. But then he had ammended himself, saying that that let her off the hook, as he thought she'd made it. This made her mad too, but he was right. But then who could have made it, because Severus surely hadn't.
One day, as they were taking a walk through the deserted cooridors, they found a secluded niche in the wall. There they decided to take advantage of the deserted cooridor.
"And that's where Minerva came in." Severus said. Hermione nodded. "We hadn't gotten very far." Severus blushed at this.
"Well, that is a very interesting story, coming from the two of you. Who would have guessed, a simple lust potion would cause all this." Hermione and Severus exchanged glances. Dumbledore knew something that he was not telling.
"How much of that did you know?" Severus asked.
"I beg your pardon?" Albus asked, the twinkle still in his eyes. "How much of what did I know?"
"Oh come on, Professor. All the students and faculty know that you know more that you let on. About everything." Hermione said. Albus nodded.
"I hoped that you wouldn't figure this out. But since you're coming so close, I might as well tell you." Hermione gave Severus a worried glance.
"I planted the potion." Hermione stared, stunned, at the Headmaster. Severus jumped to his feet, outraged.
"You did what?" Albus just grinned.
"I did that. I planted the potion, made sure that you were the only one to go clean it up, along with Miss Granger, here. Let's face it, you two have something going on. You just needed a little help."
"But we've been under the effects of a lust potion. It doesn't count." Hermione countered.
"Have you ever heard of a lust potion that lasts this long? It's been over a month. It wore off two weeks ago." Hermione stared. She'd been willingly shagging Severus Snape for a fortnight now. And she didn't regret it. She stared at Severus, who had numbly sat back down next to her.
"So, there you have it. You may thank me later, when you've gotten everything sorted out." Albus got up, and left them both in his office, speechless.
"Did you...?"
"No. I had no idea."
"Wow." Hermione said.
"So now what?" Severus asked.
"I've been willingly shagging my Potions professor. Willingly!"
"And I've been willingly shagging a know-it-all, yet very brilliant, Muggleborn witch. Not that the Muggleborn part counts at all." Severus said.
"Wanna go at it again?" Hermione asked.
"What? Here?" Severus asked her. "No." Hermione's face fell. "Lets borrow some floo powder, and take this to my rooms." Hermione grinned, and beat him to the fireplace.
Seven years later...
"Mommy! Daddy!" A childlike voice called from outside. Hermione and Severus both poked their heads out of the door, and saw their six year old son hovering above the ground on his broomstick. He was holding something with fluttery wings in his hand.
"What have you got there, Sev?" Severus asked his oldest son. The little boy opened his hand, and a small sparrow fluttered out.
"I caught it, all by myself!" Hermione watched from the door, dumbfounded. Severus patted the boy on his knee, and he zoomed away, giggling. Severus walked back over to where Hermione stood. He put his arm around her, and smiled.
"He's going to be a Seeker, that's all there is to it. You didn't by chance shag Potter too, did you?" Hermione punched her husband on the arm.
"Ew, no! He's all your son, Sevvie. He's got the Snape hair and the Snape nose. Will be able to pass for you, someday, when he's older." Severus grinned, and then kissed his wife soundly, pulling her as close as he could, because her stomach was so large it was almost impossible to get close to her.
Severus broke the kiss, and pointed at her stomach.
"Beaters, those too. Feel how they kick!" Hermione grinned.
"Believe me, I know." Severus looked over in the corner, where his daughter played with her dolls.
"Think we can convice Anita to be a Keeper?" Hermione grinned.
"Then we'll need Chasers, too."
"Triplets coming up next, I suppose?" Hermione hit her husband lightly on the arm.
"Next time, you get to carry them."