Author Notes: Okay, I know I haven't been updating for quite some while. The truth is that I have been working on thousands of stories and juggling school work and studies and EC activites that it is impossible for me to update as often as before. Work load is piling on and it is tough for me, so please understand. Studying is very important to me and I write only during my free time. Please do not get mad because of my delay. Forgive me...hope this promising chapter makes it up to you!
Chapter Twenty-Three: "Do you have a problem with homosexual people?"
"Harry? Harry! You have come to save me! I knew you still loved me!" Cho exclaimed.
"Uh no...well, I have come to save you, but not because I love you. Just because you were a fellow D.A. member."
"Oh...well, that's not very romantic. Michael should have come."
"Oh I am sorry. I will try to be more romantic the next time I am saving you, you ungrateful swine."
"Fine! Let's just leave before that little man working for You-Know-Who finds us".
"I am not little!" exclaimed a figure behind them. "I just don't get a lot to eat."
"No! Harry! We are going to die! Cedric died in the hands of them too."
"You mean that pretty boy I killed two years ago? Ah, he's as gay as Lucius' son, what's-his-name Malfoy," replied Wormtail.
"You insulted two hideous people at once. Impressive..." replied Harry.
"Hey! That is my boyfriend you are insulting!" yelled Cho angrily. "Do you have a problem with homosexual people?" asked Harry questioningly.
"Well you got to admit, lassie, he is pretty girly if you think about it. I mean, what kind of guy names his son Cedric?" responded Wormtail.
"Why are you going Scottish on me all of a sudden? (gasp) You are Scottish? I never knew! Hey, do Scottish people eat haggis, or is it the Irish people?" said Cho.
"The Scottish are the ones with the funky skirts. The Irish eat haggis. I tried haggis at Sirius' bar mitzvah once. Tasted...unusual," replied Wormtail. "My mum is Polish and my dad is English."
"(Gasp) Sirius Black was Jewish?" asked Cho.
"Hey! I never knew that! No wonder he was a girl magnet!" said Harry.
"Why did you eat haggis?" asked Cho.
"Oh, I think that's because Sirius spiked the drinks with vodka. I got drunk, so I tried the haggis. Still can't get the ruddy taste out of my mouth!" responded Wormtail.
(A/N: No offence to all the haggis fans out there! This is my personal opinion)
"Oh my gosh! Cho, we should so spike the drinks for our school graduation party," yelled Harry.
"Hey! Did you know that the Weird Sisters are playing for that party?" said Cho.
"I went out with the lead singer of the Wierd Sisters a year after I left school. She broke up with me for the lead singer of Good Charlotte,(A/N: GOOD CHARLOTTE ROCKS! I luv Benji Madden!)" said Wormtail.
"Can't say I blame her. Joel is a hottie," muttered Cho.
"You can say that again," replied Wormtail. Harry and Cho stared at him for some while. "Do you have a problem with homosexual people?" Wormtail said innocently.
Meanwhile...
"What is taking them so long?" asked a furious Hermione.
"Maybe Harry decided he liked Cho after all," replied Ron.
"Ron...that's just sick. Especially in front of the headmaster," Hermione said looking disgusted.
"Oh! No problem! You two just go on chatting about whether Harry is doing it, and I will just stand here and examine this fine china. Pity Voldemort never invited me to dinner..." Dumbledore responded.
"Hey! Where did Neville and Luna go?" asked Ron. "Over here! Just snogging!" yelled Luna behind a large tree.
"Great! Is everyone except me, you, and Dumbledore snogging?" Ron asked. "And hey Luna! I thought you were going out with me! So what? I am too sexy for you anyway!" Ron yelled.Hermione put on a fiendish grin.
"No way! You are with the ferret remember?" Ron said, his eyes popping out in surprise.
"No! I meant you and Dumbledore."
"No thanks. I will just stick to snogging Seamus."
Hermione stared at him.
"Do you have a problem with homosexual people?" asked Ron innocently.
Meanwhile...
"You have a crush on Ashton Kutcher too? Wow! We have so much in common!" said Cho excitedly.
"Have you ever searched just 'Ashton' in google images? Just 'Ashton'. Unless you are perverted like me, you probably won't enjoy the first image," replied Wormtail. "You use the internet?" asked a baffled Harry.
"Duh! Who doesn't? Voldie lets me use his computer just as long as I don't read his mail. I do it anyway. He always mails to this girl named Jessica. "Oh Jess! You make me blush! Kiss me my darling."
"He can blush?" asked Cho.
"He can kiss?" asked Harry.
"When he is in the mood. I told him Goyle fancied him once. He blushed then. Oh, he can kiss, but he uses too much tongue."
"How do you know?" asked Harry suspiciously.
"Oh, Goyle told me. I am a match-maker, you know. Voldie and Goyle were made for each other."
"Is everyone in this story gay?" asked Cho.
"Pretty much, yeah," replied Harry.
"Sorry to break this up, but I think you guys should go leave now. You are supposed to be saving her, remember?" said Wormtail.
"Well, aren't you going to try and stop us?" asked Cho.
"Nah...I think I will watch some tennis. I fancy that Federer guy. He has nice tennis shoes."
"Ok! Bye! I'll call you! We can exchange recipies!" yelled Harry.
"Sure thing! See ya later!" responded Wormtail.
"Finally!" yelled Hermione when she saw Harry and Cho walk out.
"Did You-Know-Who find you?" asked Harry.
"Yeah, but he just flashed us and walked away. His butt looks disfigured," replied Ron.
"Too much information!" shouted Hermione.
"Right then! Let's go back!" said Dumbledore.
They all held on to the portkey and landed back in Hogwarts, safe and sound...or so they thought.
End of Chapter Twenty-Three
