FIC: The Driving Lesson (3/4)

Author: Jill Disclaimer: nope, not mine, never will be; if I could I'd claim Gale though *g* Rating: R Pairing: B/A Category: Angst, Romance, Drama - all the good stuff Feedback: oh yes, please send it to Connemara.Scarlets@t-online.de Spoilers: none really, this is complete AU

I got the idea for this fic by - go figure - a Slash-story. It's called "Sleep While I Drive" by Jenn ( - the story is Clex (Smallville), just to warn you. If you are a fan of Clex - read it now. It's phenomenal.)

Cupping my palms to her face, I lifted her head. Her lashes fluttered, revealing her hazel eyes filled with confusion, but also with a desire she didn't know how to deal with. I whispered her name, then touched my mouth to hers. So sweet, so hot, so soft. I longed to take my time, to finally acquaint myself with the shape of her lips, the taste of her skin, the texture of her innocent kiss, everything I had dreamt of for a year.

I slid my tongue into her mouth, taking this first kiss to deeper levels, and she didn't object. I heard a faint moan, before she raised her hands to cling to my jacket, kissing me back.

And somehow that brought me back to reality and to what we were doing. I ended the kiss and pulled away. Breathing hard, I looked down at her, "We can't do this. It isn't fair." Was that my voice, harsh, barely functional?

First disappointment, then embarrassment, crept into her eyes, and she tried to get away, but I held her still, not wanting her to flee, not wanting her to understand wrong what just had happened between us. I had to remind myself that she was barely eighteen, and that I had to tread carefully with her. She was far too important to mess this up.

"Let me go," she demanded, her voice weak, her struggles against my hold even weaker. She avoided looking at me, by keeping her eyes cast to the ground.

"Buffy," I said softly, using one hand to cup her cheek. I wanted her to look into my eyes when I said it. "This isn't the place to do . get carried away. Also, I didn't bring you here to seduce you."

"You didn't?"

There was such disappointment in her voice, I barely suppressed a grin. She flooded crimson when she noticed what she'd just said.

"Well, not in the first place," I admitted after I was sure I wasn't going to laugh. If I was sure of one thing then it was that laughing out loud wouldn't get me any points in her book. "It's a little public anyway."

"Public." She coughed, then nodded. "Public, right." God, she was just so cute the way her blush spread to her ears and neck. I wanted to lean forward and lick . Bad, Angel. Very, very bad thought.

I cleared my throat. "Ah . Do you," I licked my lips, "have a boyfriend?"

"Huh?" She seemed completely confused, and also a little irritated with me.

"I asked-"

"I heard you." The confusion was gone, and her eyes were sharp again. "And if you have to know, it's entirely your fault that I don't." He voice was like a whip. "Not that I didn't have enough offers. There was Scott, and Xander," she started to count them on her fingers, "and Parker. Oh . and Riley. Don't forget Riley."

The question had been completely innocent, had been meant to distract her, but now I was sorry I had asked. I didn't want to hear those names, didn't want to think about the fact that each name stood for a living, full- blooded male lusting after . I frowned, "Xander? Isn't that the guy you always hang out with?"

"Yeah," she replied almost absently, chewing on her sexy lower lip. I had to take a deep breath, and still my groin tightened considerably. Suddenly she blinked, "Hey - how do you know Xander?" And a sly grin followed, "You have been watching me!"

I had, but I wasn't going to admit it. The situation was already complicated enough, without admitting that I had been stalking her. Well, not stalking, but watching . keeping an eye on her . well, something like that, and that the job had come in handy to do exactly that.

I still remember the first day of my assignment. I was standing there, wondering if Spike would show up when she suddenly appeared on top of the stairs. To say I was awestruck would be putting it mildly. The sun was shining down on her golden hair, her eyes were shining, and she was laughing. I know it sounds corny, but in the best dreams I hear that laughter and it's like my mother singing me to sleep when I was still little.

So there I was, an undercover agent, assigned to find evidence against a dealer, and I was falling head over heels for a high school student, a girl just barely seventeen. There wasn't a lot I could do, but grit my teeth and suffer through it. Of course, seeing her every day, hearing her laugh, didn't help a lot. But I somehow managed to keep myself in check, even though it was the worst kind of torture. At least I never saw her with a guy - apart from her friend Xander - which was a relief, albeit a small one.

I found myself wishing I could be at her side, wanted to hear her complaints, wanted to laugh with her about silly jokes.

I flinched when someone snapped fingers right in front of my face. "Earth to Angel. Are you still in there?"

"Huh?" I blinked and found Buffy frowning at me.

"You just went away . somewhere."

"Sorry." I sighed, annoyed at myself for daydreaming. Rubbing my nape, I looked at her, "You want some ice cream?"

"Is that another try to distract me?"

I sighed again. She didn't trust me and it wasn't really a surprise. "No. Just ice cream. Do you want some?"

She seemed to consider my offer, then finally she nodded. "Okay. But I want the biggest there is." Her head held high she stalked around the diner and entered the restaurant once again.

*****

I still remember when Greg came to live with us. He was almost fourteen and I had just left the diaper phase. I was too small to understand that he and my Dad didn't get along, but even if I had, I probably wouldn't have cared. He instantly became my hero, and until today I can hardly believe that he let me tag after him. But he did, and my worship grew.

It was just after my eighth birthday when he left. I was already old enough to hear the constant yelling and the occasional black eye. One day Greg came home and told us he had enlisted. Again my father yelled at him, but by then Greg was too big and strong for him to hit. Dad told Greg how stupid he was, that he could've gone to the academy and become an officer, but Greg looked at him, then went to his room and collected his bag. In the door he stopped, hugged me hard and promised we'd stay in touch.

That was the last time I saw him for five years. Despite his promise I heard nothing, not a call, not a letter. Only later I found out that it was because my parents prevented any communication. My father and I had out first serious confrontation after I found out what had happened. My father never even apologized. After that the relationship with my parents never really recovered. My mother and I talk on the phone from time to time, but I avoid my father whenever possible. The only regret I have is my little sister, Kathy. She's fourteen now and I wish I could talk to her more often.

"You're daydreaming."

Buffy's voice cut through my musings and slightly shook my head when I looked at her over the table. In front of her sat the most enormous cookie dough mint chip ice cream I'd ever seen. On top was whipped cream, decorated with hot fudge I could smell all the way across the table.

"You're actually going to eat that?"

She gave me an evil grin and picked up the spoon. "Just watch me."

I shuddered slightly, and suddenly remembered something. "Who is Riley?" He wasn't just Riley. Don't forget Riley, she'd said. I felt another stab of jealousy. Damn. I had it bad.

The spoon still in her mouth she narrowed her eyes at me. "Huh?"

The spoon left her mouth and the tip of her tongue followed, licking over the lips I had tasted not long ago. Heat rushed into my groin and I spoke a silent prayer of thanks that we were sitting, and nobody could see beneath my waistline. "Riley," I croaked, and had to clear my throat. "You mentioned someone called Riley."

Another spoon full of ice cream wandered into her mouth, and she closed her eyes to savor the taste. "Oh . hmmm . Riley."

This time jealousy was like a hot iron slamming into my gut, cooling my groin considerably. Hmmm . Riley? What the . "Yeah," I kept my voice as cool as a cucumber, "Riley."

Again her eyes narrowed as another spoon of ice cream disappeared in her mouth, "Hmmm . Why do you want to know about Riley? Are you jealous?"

I'd always guessed that Buffy was a smart girl. Unlike other guys, who were happy with a dumb Bimbo with a hot body, I was always attracted to girls who could do more than to just care for the size of their boobs. Right then, however, I wished Buffy didn't have such a sharp brain.

"Jealous?" I asked as if it was the most foreign concept, my voice sounding unnaturally high. "Dream on, little girl."

She shrugged, clearly not believing it. "Riley was . a college student."

A college student? I took a deep breath. "Good looking?"

Again ice-cream disappeared into her mouth. "Hmmm . I guess. Blond, blue eyes, over six foot .," she trailed off, licking whipped cream that had been left on her lower lip.

I, on the other hand, kept my hands beneath the table, clenching and unclenching my fingers as she added description after description of this unknown college student. Gritting my teeth, I managed to press out, "Sports?"

She shrugged again, "Yeah. Probably. I mean," she scoped up another spoon, "He had those really wide shoulders. "They were even wider than the chairs," she laughed, pearly, clearly enjoying the memory - and I wanted to pound good old Riley into the ground. The she let out a long sigh, "And now he's gone." The spoon clattered on the table and her eyes were suddenly blazing, "And whose fault is that? Huh?"

"Ah." I was speechless. In a flash she'd gone from temptress to tigress. Wow!

"It's yours."

Mine? "Uh . mine?"

"Yours!" She glared at me, her slim forefinger pointing at my nose. "Because you were always there. Giving me those looks."

I had given her looks? "I don't remember giving you any looks."

"You were SO giving me looks. And," she blushed a little, "okay, I was giving you looks. But that's *not* the point here. The point is, by pretending to be interested in me, you destroyed all my opportunities to lose my virginity before I wither and die."

As soon as the words were out, she turned the color of ripe tomatoes, her eyes went huge with shock and she clamped a hand over her mouth. She looked so cute, I wanted to reach over, pull her into my lap and kiss her senseless.

I had to bite down on the laugh that wanted to break free, and tried to keep a straight face instead. "I think it will be while until you wither and die, Buffy."

Avoiding my eyes, she muttered, "You don't know that."

"Buffy," I said softly, "look at me."

"I can't," she replied, her voice heavy with embarrassment. "God! I want to die right now."

This time I couldn't hold back the chuckle. "Buffy. Being a virgin at eighteen isn't something to be ashamed of."

"What do you know?" she attacked once again, embarrassment gone. "You probably lost your virginity at fourteen."

"What?"

"I mean, look at you." She gestured at me, waving her hand. "You probably were a babe magnet the moment you left your mother's womb."

I grinned. "Nice imagery. But no, I wasn't. Well, at least, I don't think so. I can't really remember."

Now she had to laugh as well. Throwing her napkin at me, she giggled, "You're impossible."

"So I've been told. And just so you know, I lost my virginity on the night of my seventeenth birthday." I shrugged when I saw her eyes widen, "Call me a late bloomer." It wasn't a memory I was particularly fond of. Greg was the only other person - apart from my father - who knew what had happened that night.

"Late bloomer, my ass," she shot back. "Seventeen!" It was almost like a wail, before she sighed. "Oh, well, Riley wasn't that great anyway."

Riley again. "So you . ah . never even considered ." I trailed off, wondering what had gotten into me that I was discussing a wanna-be - and never would be if I had a say in this - first lover with Buffy. I had to be insane. I sighed inwardly. No, I wasn't insane, just head over heels in love with this high school student. I was so far gone, it wasn't even funny anymore.

I was definitely insane.

She scooped another spoon of ice cream and cocked her head. "Honestly? Maybe for a minute. I mean, he was not bad. Kind of lame. But . Willow said he had a nice body, and he was . right. You know, responsible and all. Older, probably experienced." She sighed, and licked a drop of ice cream from the spoon.

I barely kept from pointing out that I was experienced as well. But fortunately I did, because I wasn't sure if it would get me any points in Buffy's book. Apart from the fact that it's bad style to bring up former lovers.

"So," Buffy went on after swallowing, "how was she?"

"Who?" I asked, pretending I didn't get it.

She rolled her eyes, calling my bluff. "The girl. The one who you slept with."

"Older." I winced, "Experienced."

Her eyes narrowed. "How much older?"

"Ten years."

Her eyes rounded, "Wow."

I wasn't sure it was awe I heard in her voice. "Yeah."

"How did you meet?"

I kept my voice emotionless. "My father brought us together."

For a moment she was silent. I even wondered if I had rendered her speechless, but then she almost shouted, "What? Your father ."

I nodded, the memory like a brick of ice in my chest. Talk about fatherly love. "He hired a prostitute. She seduced me. It was his birthday present. He wanted to make sure I was a real man." It still hurt to think about it. Like every other virgin I had been half way in love with the woman when it was over. Only to find out that it had been my father's doing all along.

"But . why?" She was still stunned, the concept obviously completely foreign to her. Thank God.

"I told you, girls usually came on to me. But I wasn't particularly interested. My father was afraid I might be gay, so he made sure I was properly introduced to the joys of female company." When she didn't say anything, I said, "I'm sorry. I shouldn't-"

"No," she interrupted me. "Don't be. I'm glad you trusted me enough to tell me." Her eyes were very gentle, very understanding, and so beautiful it hurt.

Greg once told me that love, when it happened, was the most beautiful thing in the world. I didn't believe him. But now I do. What the bastard never told me, however, was that it hurts like hell, too.

I had to draw a sharp breath to keep my emotions in check. "It's . uh . okay." I cleared my throat, "Anyway. Greg was there for me - again. He and my father got into a big fight because of what happened."

She took a sip from the coke she had ordered with the ice cream. "You gonna tell me again what a great guy he is?" Her eyes were a little weary and I decided to back off a little.

"No," I shook my head and smiled at her. "I'll rest my case. I told you what I thought you needed to know." And inwardly I cursed Greg for asking me for this favor.

It had seemed so innocent, his request to talk to Joyce's older daughter, apart from the fact that she was gorgeous, I had the hots for her, and the prospect of spending some time with her in a place far away from home looked promising. My ego was big enough to make myself believe that I could make her fall for me. I also had noticed the looks she gave me when she came out of her school. There was a spark between us and I had every intention to kindle it.

Only, the kindling wasn't going the way I had hoped. Instead she hated me for what I'd done. Okay, so maybe hate was a little too strong. I didn't really think she hated me, but she wasn't harboring the fondest feelings for me right now.

On the other hand, we had kissed and from where I stood she had enjoyed it as much as I.

"So," she asked after another silence. "Are you going to take me home now?"

Even though I didn't really want to end out time together, hoping maybe I could make her see I wasn't a bad guy after all, I also had to accept that she probably needed some time to digest what had happened today. So I nodded and stood, "Okay. Let's go."

She seemed surprised by the fact that I had agreed so easily, but she smiled nevertheless and followed me out of the diner. "Can I drive?"

I eyed her warily, "You promise not to wreck my car?"

She laughed. "I managed to get us here in one piece, right?"

"Yeah," I agreed. "But that was before you knew why we came."

She stopped and tilted her head, making her blond hair fall to one side and giving me a nice look at her slender neck. I had to keep myself from licking my lips, but I still saw images in front of my inner eye if myself licking said neck, nipping it, caressing it with little love bites.

I felt my groin tighten and quickly shut down my own private fantasy. It wasn't going to help if she became aware that I was sporting a raging hard on in bright daylight. She was only eighteen after all.

After a moment we walked on and reached the car that was standing at the far end of the parking space. "Okay," I said when we came to stand at the driver's door. "You can drive." I dangled the keys in front of her face and she snatched it from my hand and grinned.

"Thanks," she said and leaned back against the door. Closing her eyes she sighed, "I don't want this day to end." Her voice sounded sexy and I sucked in a sharp breath.

Huh? Had I missed something? How had she suddenly gone from being pissed to temptress? But hey, who was I to deny her anything. Especially if it meant she had stopped hating me. Looking down at her upturned face, I took a step towards her. "I don't want it to, either," I said and kissed her.

Instantly she pressed herself against me and opened her mouth underneath mine and touched my lips with her tongue. God, it was a turn on! I heard a groan and realized it was my own, while my arms seemed to tighten around her on their own account, pulling her even closer to me. Her mouth tasted wonderful, the lingering aroma of the ice cream still on them, and they were moist and warm and soft, just the way they'd been before.

Her hands came around my body and moved upwards, caressing my shoulder blades, while one of her legs pressed between mine, as if she was trying to get closer, even closer, to me.

I heard myself groan again, "God, Buffy-"

She pulled my head down, pulled my lips to her and kissed me again. For about half a second I wondered if I'd gone insane, this was broad daylight, and we were standing in the middle of a public parking space, but when she nearly crushed my mouth with hers, I didn't care anymore who might see or not see us, instead I started kissing her chin, her neck, wanting to taste every part of her.

I closed my eyes when she returned those kisses, her soft lips stroking the skin of my cheeks, my chin, then fluttering over my Adam's apple. I sighed deeply, losing myself in the sensations and .

Nothing.

Suddenly she was gone. My arms were empty, but I needed a moment to come down from the high I'd just flown to, and when I opened my eyes she grinned at me through the open window of my car. It was running already, the engine purring as usual.

I stared at her, "Wh-what?" What the hell was going on? Shaking my head to clear the daze my mind still seemed in, I started to walk around the car, but before I had a chance the car started to roll.

"Sorry, Angel," she said, her grin even wider than before. "Hope you'll find someone to take you back," she shouted, and floored the gas pedal.

to be continued .