Moonshine on Moonshadow

Drama/Angst

In which Harry watches Lupin and Luna, and changes his view of the world. Possibly.

It was a late night in Number 12, Grimmauld Place. Harry Potter walked along the corridors, hands protectively clutching a rather worn and tattered photo album, the conversation he'd overheard earlier replaying in his mind...

"...it doesn't help that he doesn't have anything to remind him of Sirius. No paintings, no photographs- all lost or given away. No sense of closure... poor Remus. Dumbledore'd said he'd do what he can, but even he-"

"Quiet! The Potter boy's just walking outside, he'll hear you!" Mad-Eye's distinctive growl was impossible to mistake.

"Harry? Gosh, better not worry him with this stuff- hey, but he should be asleep by now-"

The voice had fallen silent. Possibly Tonks? but the voice was indistinct; there'd been a wall in the way. Harry had wanted to hear more, but with Mad-Eye Moody probably watching him though the wall... he'd decided to walk back to his room, where Ron lay asleep. He'd intended to sleep, or at least some attempt at sleep; but the sight of his precious photo album open on his bed, worn with heavy use over the past few weeks, had stirred a plan into action...

Though the plan didn't seem quite as good now. Harry had intended to show his photo album to Professor Lupin, but misgivings were starting to twinge in his mind. He'd hoped that the professor might take some comfort from photos of Sirius, as Harry himself had done... but somehow, standing outside Lupin's door, Harry was loathe to part with the book. It was his last lifeline to Sirius, apart from his Firebolt. And the happy, smiling faces of his parents... vastly different from the snatches of sound and light and fury that was his only real memory of his parents, the memory of their death.

No, his mind supplied treacherously, not the only memory. A brief image from Snape's pensieve rose in his mind. His mother, furious, eyes cold, wand extended at 15-year old James...

Harry shuddered violently, and opened the album to his parent's wedding. His mother, eyes shining, arm in arm with his father, Sirius standing beside them. Young and in love and carefree, immortalised forever on paper. A glimpse of a life that could have been... How could he ever give it up?

"You're being unreasonable, Harry. Selfish. It's not like you," the inner Hermione of his conscience chided. But what did she know? She had parents, dentists both. Harry had neither. And the world was unreasonable anyway, expecting some scarred 16-year old orphan not even out of school to defeat some psychotic omnipotent Dark Lord with a swarm of Death Eaters at his beck and call. All alone, him against the darkness. All alone.

But another glance at the worn, tear-streaked page broke him out of his self-pity. Professor Lupin - Remus - was in the photo as well, standing in the sidelines, shooting happy, envious glances at the bridal couple. Remus... deserved a chance, a chance to remember Sirius and Lily and James as they were, as how he would want to remember them. And with that resolve, Harry opened the door wide and stepped inside. The photos were Harry's, undoubtedly, but he could... share them for awhile. For a few minutes, at least...

The instant he stepped into the room, however, he realised he had made a mistake. Moonlight streamed in bright into the room, illuminating a sleeping Remus, curled up at the foot of some curtains, paws next to a vial of dreamless sleep, cork stopper bit off. A still-smoking golden goblet rested gently on a table, the somewhat distorted heat haze above it reflecting Harry's inner confusion.

It had not occurred to him that it was nearly full moon. And, eyes resting on the goblet, it occurred to Harry that perhaps Snape wasn't the monster that he made himself out to be. Harry had promised himself, after Sirius's death, that he would never, ever forgive Snape - but observing Remus dozing comfortably on the floor, for once unmarked by by violent transformations, his resolve to hate Snape forever crumbled slightly. He'd have to stop hating Snape for awhile, then. Until his next Occlumency lesson, at least.

Harry admired Remus, peacefully sleeping. Just yesterday, Remus had appeared a broken man, haggard and disoriented. And yet somehow he'd managed to pull himself together. Although it was impossible to be certain, there appeared to be a smile on the werewolf's face. Dreamless sleep was just that, dreamless sleep, it didn't do anything for your emotional state, as Harry was all too well aware of. The smile on Remus's face was genuine, and Harry wondered at the professor's emotional strength -perhaps he wouldn't need to see the album then, Harry thought, then felt guilty about it.

He was tempted to stay, but he should get to bed. Turning, he left the room, when a glimmer of motion behind the curtain caught his eye.

Harry whirled, yanked at the curtain, and extended his wand to attack-

Sirius?

A rush of feelings overcame him. Shock. Surprise. Delight! Then horrified realization- it had to be an impostor, just another of Voldemort's plots against him!

Sudden rage boiled in Harry - for one glorious second he'd dared to hope that Sirius had returned. All the pain and anger he'd suffered for the past weeks rushed back in a microsecond. The intruder would pay dearly.

"STUPEFY!" he exclaimed, wishing in his heart for some darker, more powerful spell to utterly destroy the impostor.

He expected the fake-Sirius to block, or duck, or cast a shield. He hoped that the intruder would fall unconscious, or perhaps even dead-

As such, he was entirely unprepared for what happened next. The spell ricocheted off at a strange angle, narrowly missing his head, flew out through the window, then hit a wall and dissipated. This unexpected turn of events utterly confused Harry. At one level of his mind, he registered relief - the Decree for the Restriction Wizardry had been relaxed recently, but attacking Muggles in the street was certainly frowned upon. At another, he noted the vaguely disturbing resemblance between the thick shroud curtains and a certain veil. In a third, he realised that nobody, not even Remus, was awake, and that in this battle he was going to be on his own. In yet another, heart racing, he wondered why he wasn't dead yet.

And then, light shining onto the an elaborate gold frame with familiar engravings, Harry realized what he was seeing.

Third time lucky. He had once again stumbled upon the Mirror of Erised.

And in the mirror, his parents and godfather were waiting for him... a vague warning from the past rose in his head, but he ignored it. Nothing was going to stop him from staying right here.

Harry settled cross-legged on the floor, staring into the mirror, absently stroking the sleeping werewolf. Nobody else would come, to avoid disturbing Professor Lupin from his slumber. He'd have all night, free from Dark Lords and Dumbledores, safe with his family...


"That's a really interesting frame, you know."

Harry jerked up, breaking from his reverie. In a blur of motion his wand was extended, a curse on his lips-

and relaxed. A familiar pair of wide pearlescent eyes peered out of the darkness, reflecting the moonlight behind him. Harry fought an urge to blink.

"Luna? What are you doing here?" he asked, recovering. It was late at night, yet Luna's eyes were bright and alert as ever. For once, her long blonde hair was neatly tucked in place behind her wand ear, and she was wearing a long white nightgown. The glow of the moon reflecting off her dress contrasted spectacularly with the bright orange kangaroo pocket she'd apparently sewn onto the front. Odd, yet practical. Despite himself, a slight grin appeared on his face; only Luna would be entirely unconcerned at being held at wandpoint.

"Well, there's the Ministry hearing next week, you know. That should be interesting. I've got all manner of questions to ask them! There's just so much to ask about the Heliopaths! Wonder how they tame them... and what would you feed a spirit of fire? And their inexcusable conduct over the Goblin pies conspiracy, we'll certainly have to conduct a thorough investigation into that! And oh, so many other things, I've got a list somewhere here..." Luna began rummaging in her pocket. As she started removing various pens and bits of parchment onto the table, Harry idly wondered how she managed to sleep with everything on.

"I know that. Erm, I mean, what are you doing up this late at night?" he queried. Luna had a tendency to answer the wrong question at times... privately he wondered if she did it on purpose, to amuse. Harry was well aware of the Ministry hearing, it was the reason Luna, Ron, Ginny and Hermione were in Grimmauld Place. As for the sixth member of their little group, Neville's grandmother was arranging for him to join them in a few days.

Luna had gone to Sweden with her father over the holidays, but Luna had returned early to meet up with them, and for one Harry was glad for her company. In a house full of memories, each one a potential landmine of painful recollections, it was cheerful to have someone who didn't care if she sat in Sirius's usual seat, and who didn't tiptoe around him, and who'd accidentally set the house-elf heads on fire then Evanesco'd them away ("Honestly, Luna..."). She defused all the potentially painful memories with her madcap actions and hysterical laughter... Just occasionally, he wondered if she was really the same person who'd so solemnly and comfortingly spoken of death at the end of the last term.

Harry blinked. In his reverie, he'd missed Luna's response. Something about hot chocolate, and late night snacks. And now she was looking at the mirror!

For a brief moment, his heart stopped. Would she see the mirror, realize what it meant? Would she think him weak, unable to cope? Which was ridiculous. She'd already seen him broken, at the end of last term. And a certain curiosity fell over him. What would Luna Lovegood see? Herself as Head Girl?(Harry dismissed that immediately) A Crumple-Horned Snorkack? (Perhaps...) Ron? (She always acted a little more unusual around him, certainly... but somehow Harry was uncomfortable with the idea). Her family, all around her?

Her mother? At this thought, Harry felt a sudden rush of sympathy. He'd never known his parents. But to know a parent, and to have her taken away... was infinitely worse. If she saw her mother... would she be one of those trapped forever, under the mirror's spell? He should warn her...

But unsurprisingly, Luna surprised him yet again. Both Ron and Harry had been strangely attracted to the mirror, but Luna didn't even give it a second glance. She'd merely mussed her perfect hair into slight disarray, and continued peering at the mirror frame. Harry didn't know what to think of this. Try as he might, he couldn't think of anything to explain the lack of reaction. And with all the tragedies she'd suffered in life, Luna didn't exactly seem 'the happiest man', or rather girl, alive.

'I show not your face but your heart's desire' she mused, quietly. Harry was briefly surprised that she had worked out the mirror's secret, herself, in so little time. No, wait. A girl who could read upside-down would have few problems reading right-to-left... and the inscription above the mirror was beguilingly familiar.

"What do you see?" he asked. Luna looked nonplussed.

"A rather interesting gold-framed mirror, inscribed. Those certainly are unusual feet, aren't they? And, it's Professor Lupin!" she exclaimed, eyes bright. "And he seems much better than yesterday, too. And he's a wolf! Do you think he'd mind if I touch him?" Without waiting for a response, she swooped down excitedly and began stroking his fur. Thankfully, the sleeping potion held sway. Harry felt a brief surge of annoyance, he was certain Professor Lupin would not appreciate being manhandled in this manner.

"No, I meant in the mirror," he said. Luna gave him a look of blank curiosity, and gazed once more into the mirror.

"There's one Harry Potter, and one Luna Lovegood, and adorable Professor Lupin... do you think he'd let Daddy write an article about him? He seems so peaceful, sleeping there... not at all like what the Ministry says. They say" - eyes wide - "that werewolves go out of control during the full moon. But-"

"No, that's not what I meant! I mean..." Harry trailed off. What did he mean? "I mean, don't you see anything, erm, unusual?" he continued lamely.

A mischievous look spread over Luna's features.

"Don't worry, Harry. I won't tell anyone anything about the burn on the wall if you don't," she intoned, her solemn voice contrasting sharply with her impish looks and the delight dancing in her misty eyes.

Harry blushed. She'd noticed that?

"No... in the mirror, you don't see your mother?" he asked - then cursed himself for his choice of words. For an instant, the slightest suggestion of a shadow fell across her face- and then she blinked, and it was gone.

'Well, yes, sometimes, out of the corner of my eye... but I think it's always more important to want to see what's really there. That's what matters, really' she replied, a wistful smile flitting across her dreamy features. She reinforced her words with a slight nod, the tip of her wand dancing in the air.

Harry turned away, eyes closed, considering this. The thing Luna wanted above all... was to see the world as it was. There was a certain logic to her words... Had he dwelled too long on death, till he'd forgotten to live? Ron and Hermione lay asleep, upstairs, somewhere. Ginny'd be with them... they'd been worrying about him. And in the comfortable silence, Remus asleep, and Luna standing patiently beside him... No need to search in mystic mirrors; he still had family, alive and present. Waiting for him to see them.

To see the world the way it was...

In the mirror, he saw himself and Luna, Remus curled up on the floor. Though his parents and Sirius were still behind them.

Well, it's a start, he thought.

It was best to see what was really there... but then again, Dumbledore had once said that his father was alive in him. In a sense, they'd always be watching over him... and knowing this, he felt gently comforted.

His parents and godfather still smiled out of the mirror, but he wouldn't have it any other way.

"Thanks, Luna..." he trailed off, at a loss for words. She seemed to understand, though, and gave him another dreamy smile.

"You're welcome, Harry." she said simply. "And now... " she continued, happily, "hot chocolate!" She fished two spoons out of her pocket, and waved them excitedly at Harry. He smiled, and helped her gather up her scattered pens, papers and oddments...

As they prepared to leave, Harry watched Remus, tired and alone on the floor- and took out Hagrid's photo album. Sighing deeply, he slipped a few choice photos under the potion vial, where Remus would see them in the morning, and covered the cloth back over the mirror.