11. The Color Black (alternate theme)
Rating: PG
Characters: Yuuri, Gwendal, Yuuri's mother, Wolfram, Murata
It was just way too hot in Shin Mazoku for this. Hadn't anybody thought about the fact that it was regularly above a hundred degrees in the summer when they were designing the Maou's royal attire?
"Gweeeeendal," Yuuri whined, laying his torso over the desk in the hopes that the marble top would cool down the black wool just a little. "I can't go on, I'm going to die!"
"No one ever died of wearing clothes in the summer," Gwendal informed him, setting another stack of paperwork in front of him.
"That's because no one ever wore this before me!" Yuuri snapped. God, this was unbearable, he was going to melt into a puddle, probably one that spelled 'Justice' and then they'd all be sorry!
"Aren't you done yet?" Wolfram demanded, strolling in the door, and Yuuri glared with open loathing at his white shirt with the sleeves rolled up. Not only did Wolfram get to go without his blue uniform jacket whenever he felt like it, heat didn't seem to affect the fire elemental anyway. Yuuri debated calling on the spirit of the original Maou to rain on his parade.
"No," he snapped. "And even if I was, it's too hot for sword practice! I'm dying and all I'm doing is sitting here!"
"Because you can afford to skip practice," Wolfram retorted. "It isn't like there hasn't been five duels, three attempted kidnappings, one successful kidnapping and one amphibious assault, and that was just in the last week."
"It wasn't an amphibious assault," Yuuri grumbled, snatching up his quill and signing several documents quickly. "It was one guy crawling out of the fountain, and he was only in the fountain because you threw him in."
"Doesn't mean he wasn't after you," Wolfram sniffed.
Just then, Murata came through the door with a pitcher of ice water.
"Murata!" Yuuri called, throwing down his quill with a grin. Gwendal rubbed his temples. "Just what I need, a nice cold glass of water!"
"Sorry about this, your majesty," Murata gave him an apologetic smile, "but Ulrike says it's an emergency."
Yuuri had barely opened his mouth to ask what was going on when Murata dumped the contents of the pitcher over his head. Yuuri's yelp was cut off by the usual swirling and rushing of water.
Coming too, Yuuri found himself sitting half in the sink in his own kitchen. His mother, who was stirring something on the stove, seemed nonplussed.
"Back again, Yu-chan?" she asked. Yuuri barely grunted a reply as he shoved himself out of the sink and began stripping off the hated wool uniform and flinging pieces in all directions. When he was wearing nothing but his Mazoku underwear, Yuuri flopped down onto the kitchen floor with a sigh of relief, spreading his arms and legs wide to touch as much of the cool tile as possible.
"Yu-chan," Jennifer said, and Yuuri cracked an eye to find her peering down at his remaining article of clothing, "as your mother, I try not to pry into your personal hobbies, but…"
"Mo-om!" Yuuri whined. "Not now, it's too hot!"
"Welcome back, your majesty," Conrad said as Yuuri stood up in the fountain and shook the wet hair out of his eyes.
"Hey, Wolfram!" Yuuri called as he climbed out, "take cover! It's an amphibious assault!"
"Fuck you, Yuuri," Wolfram grumbled, giving Yuuri a shove to send him tumbling back into the water. Yuuri grabbed his arm as he toppled backwards, dragging Wolfram down with him, and he and Conrad both howled with laughter at Wolfram's indignant spluttering.
"Your majesty!" Gunter exclaimed, coming running out to the courtyard just as Yuuri managed to get the whole way out of the fountain. He rushed over and squeezed Yuuri until Yuuri thought his eyes were going to pop out.
"Yes yes, Gunter, it's good to see you," Yuuri patted his arm and tried to wriggle free.
"But what are you wearing, your majesty?" Gunter asked, pulling back to get a good look at him. Although soaked, Yuuri's black t-shirt and shorts were none the worse for wear.
"About that," Yuuri said, giving Gunter his best Who's The Maou Now look. "We're going to have a talk about the Maou's summer wardrobe."
